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LittleScholars 11:28 AM 06-09-2017
This has probably been answered, but I can't seem to find the answer.

Mom and dad are unmarried and broke up. Mom filed for an order of protection against dad earlier this week. He RARELY picks up and never unannounced; however, today mom said if he shows up to call her and not let him in. I've done some googling and it seems unclear to me whether the order of protection also protects the children (some legal sources seem to say yet). I feel completely comfortable managing the situation, but I want to make sure I am managing it the correct way. I'm in NY if that helps.

Additionally, I feel like I'm being set up to help mom get custody. I'm not interested in being part of this at all. Any advice on that topic?
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Laurie 11:46 AM 06-09-2017
I'm not sure what NY laws are, but here in CA, we must have the court documents in hand stating the father is not allowed to pick up the child from daycare. If we do not have anything from the courts, the father had every right to pick up his child.

It kinda sounds like you don't have any court orders. I personally would call the mother and let her know you must have a court document before doing anything against the father. I bet NY is the same as CA, but I'm not a lawyer!

As for being put in the middle of a divorce or custody battle. I make it very clear to each parent that I won't become involved. I'm here for the child and will only look out for the child and follow the states court orders.

Hope that helps a little
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LittleScholars 11:54 AM 06-09-2017
Originally Posted by Laurie:
I'm not sure what NY laws are, but here in CA, we must have the court documents in hand stating the father is not allowed to pick up the child from daycare. If we do not have anything from the courts, the father had every right to pick up his child.

It kinda sounds like you don't have any court orders. I personally would call the mother and let her know you must have a court document before doing anything against the father. I bet NY is the same as CA, but I'm not a lawyer!

As for being put in the middle of a divorce or custody battle. I make it very clear to each parent that I won't become involved. I'm here for the child and will only look out for the child and follow the states court orders.

Hope that helps a little
It totally does. I told her I was pretty certain this was the case. I'll talk to her this evening and ask for documentation (should she wish to provide it).

Thank you!
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mommyneedsadayoff 12:27 PM 06-09-2017
Originally Posted by LittleScholars:
This has probably been answered, but I can't seem to find the answer.

Mom and dad are unmarried and broke up. Mom filed for an order of protection against dad earlier this week. He RARELY picks up and never unannounced; however, today mom said if he shows up to call her and not let him in. I've done some googling and it seems unclear to me whether the order of protection also protects the children (some legal sources seem to say yet). I feel completely comfortable managing the situation, but I want to make sure I am managing it the correct way. I'm in NY if that helps.

Additionally, I feel like I'm being set up to help mom get custody. I'm not interested in being part of this at all. Any advice on that topic?
As mentioned, my understanding is that unless there is a court order, dad can pick up his child. I would let mom know and if she wishes to pick the child up early to avoid an issues, it may be a good idea until she can get things legally settled.
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Leigh 12:31 PM 06-09-2017
You MAY not have an obligation to release to an unmarried father. I have heard that some states automatically "give" full custody to the mother in unmarried situations unless the father petitions for a custody/visitation order. MAYBE licensing can help you with this? Maybe Tom Copeland could help with the answer?
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Snowmom 01:42 PM 06-09-2017
Are you licensed?
I would call my licensor asap to see what you can/cannot legally do.
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Blackcat31 01:47 PM 06-09-2017
Originally Posted by LittleScholars:
This has probably been answered, but I can't seem to find the answer.

Mom and dad are unmarried and broke up. Mom filed for an order of protection against dad earlier this week. He RARELY picks up and never unannounced; however, today mom said if he shows up to call her and not let him in. I've done some googling and it seems unclear to me whether the order of protection also protects the children (some legal sources seem to say yet). I feel completely comfortable managing the situation, but I want to make sure I am managing it the correct way. I'm in NY if that helps.

Additionally, I feel like I'm being set up to help mom get custody. I'm not interested in being part of this at all. Any advice on that topic?
Did she provide you with a copy of the order for protection?

Usually (not positive on NY laws) when this occurs, the parent lists the minor child also. Especially if they are in the situation Leigh mentioned about the father not being legally recognized as the father.

So I am wondering if the child is listed by name on the order or not?

If not, I wonder why mom wouldn't have included the child if she didn't want him to have contact with the child either.....unless she has no issue with him having contact and IF that is the case, they will have to have some sort of custody arrangement ON PAPER to provide to the child care.
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daycarediva 02:01 PM 06-09-2017
Court order on file or the child is released to the parent.
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bklsmum 07:01 AM 06-10-2017
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
Court order on file or the child is released to the parent.
^
This.
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Meeko 03:05 PM 06-11-2017
It is considered kidnapping to keep a child from their parent here in Utah unless you have proper documentation.

I make sure parents know that unless I have a certified copy of a court order banning a parent from picking up at daycare...that I will hand over the child, no questions asked. I will call the other parent afterwards...but will not stop a biological parent from taking their child.
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hwichlaz 08:22 PM 06-11-2017
I'll release the child either way. I'm not law enforcment and I'm not putting myself or the other kids at risk.

First I'll call 911, then answer the door. I'll let the parent know that I have a documented restraining order in my file and that I've got 911 on the line. If he/she still takes the child, I'm not going to fight them...but the police will be on the way and they will do THEIR job.
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Tags:custody battle, restraining order
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