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KBCsMommy 09:13 AM 01-12-2012
So Ive decided to terminate my DC baby. Im giving notice today since dcm has a 4 day weekend. Ive given them a 2 week notice with the last week of January as their day.

Should I have a meeting with dcm. Ive written up a general letter that says:

Dear DC Family,

I regret to inform you that I can no longer provide dadycare services for @@@@. It has been a pleasure watching him grow and working with your family. It is with a heavy heart that I have come to this decision.

Sincerely,
Daycare Provider



Should I just give them the letter when dc baby gets picked up.

Is it going to be weird for the next few weeks?

Im just wondering because I raised my rates in January and when I gave the family notice in November dcm didnt talk to me for 2 days. I guess she got over it because they signed the contract and didnt question it.

How have families reacted when you gave them 2 week notices?
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beachgrl 09:42 AM 01-12-2012
Good luck with it, I havent had to term anyone yet but am just getting started . The one dcb I had thought about letting due to behavior and the dcp being pita..just didnt come back once I insituted contracts for care, never even came and got his stuff..good riddance on that one honestly but thNkfully my other families so far are awesome!
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pfund2233 09:55 AM 01-12-2012
I gave a 2 week term notice back in April of 2011 for a DCB who was 9mo. He would scream ALL day and got to the point where I couldn't even get him to stop or eat. I was so stress along with the other kids and I knew it wasn't fair to the little guy either. I gave a 2 week term notice on a Thursday and got a call that night that he wouldn't be back at all... So just be ready for her to pull completely.
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Blackcat31 10:11 AM 01-12-2012
Originally Posted by KBCsMommy:
So Ive decided to terminate my DC baby. Im giving notice today since dcm has a 4 day weekend. Ive given them a 2 week notice with the last week of January as their day.

Should I have a meeting with dcm. Have you already brought to mom's attention the reasons why you are terming? Are they behavior related or are you just downsizing?

Ive written up a general letter that says:

Dear DC Family,

I regret to inform you that I can no longer provide dadycare services for @@@@. It has been a pleasure watching him grow and working with your family. It is with a heavy heart that I have come to this decision.

Sincerely,
Daycare Provider



Should I just give them the letter when dc baby gets picked up. I always give my term letters at pick up AND accompanied by a little chat so they have a bit of forewarning...kwim?

Is it going to be weird for the next few weeks? This depends on your current relationship with them. If you are terming because of something you don't see eye to eye on, it may be weird. Sometimes families opt to not use the final two weeks and sometimes they do, like i said, it is dependant on what the situation is.
Im just wondering because I raised my rates in January and when I gave the family notice in November dcm didnt talk to me for 2 days. I guess she got over it because they signed the contract and didnt question it.

How have families reacted when you gave them 2 week notices?
I have had families that beg me to keep their child, not care that I termed, been angry to the point of altercation and having to tell them to leave, had parents that were ok with it and completely understanding and had mom's react by being silent but angry. I guess I have had them all.
I answered in bold.

Oh, and wishing you luck for a smooth process....
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Ariana 10:13 AM 01-12-2012
Good luck I've never termed outside of my "integration period" so have never given notice. Not sure how it would work but hopefully everyone remains mature about it.
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Cat Herder 10:37 AM 01-12-2012
IME, they take it as personal rejection.

Each seem to take it a bit differently but most get angry.
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KBCsMommy 11:28 AM 01-12-2012
Thanks for responding ladies...

Im terminating because this child is just not happy here. He doesnt sleep. He screams and cries all day long because he has the worst seperation anxiety I have ever seen. He is so stressed out by the end of the day his little hands are shaking from nerves.

The other kids are now affected by it. Everytime he starts crying, the others start crying.

My own kids are affected by this, the first thing they say when they get home is how was **** today?

Also dcmom keeps saying shes going to quit her job so she can stay home too. So I never know if they are coming back or not!!!

Ive had several conversations with mom about him. She says hes fine at home and has no problems with him at all. And he sleeps like an angel.
I have a very hard time believing her.

I think this child would be much better off with a nanny or with grandma so he can be coddled and get the attention he needs.

I hope they are not surprised, if they are surprised then all my conversations have fell on deaf ears, and I feel sorry for this child to have parents that are not understanding of his needs.
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Blackcat31 11:34 AM 01-12-2012
If you word your response to mom with the child's needs as your main concern (which they obviously are) she may be hurt and intially upset but ideally, as a parent how can you not respect someone who is trying to do what is right for your child?

It is probably not healthy for him to be in a situation that affects him so much. Poor little fella. I quit my job for that same reason. My child needed me.

If I were you, I would simply talk with mom and tell her what you said here. Tell her how physically upsetting this is to her son. This might be the push she needs to do what she already knows needs to be done.
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DaisyMamma 11:47 AM 01-12-2012
Have a chat with her when she comes. Make sure she knows that your concerns are about his well being.
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KBCsMommy 12:44 PM 01-12-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
If you word your response to mom with the child's needs as your main concern (which they obviously are) she may be hurt and intially upset but ideally, as a parent how can you not respect someone who is trying to do what is right for your child?

It is probably not healthy for him to be in a situation that affects him so much. Poor little fella. I quit my job for that same reason. My child needed me.

If I were you, I would simply talk with mom and tell her what you said here. Tell her how physically upsetting this is to her son. This might be the push she needs to do what she already knows needs to be done.
Thank you Blackcat for understanding.

She knows she needs to be home with him, she keeps saying maybe next month, and has been saying that for awile.

Im hoping she will see it this way. I do have his best interest at heart, although it is driving me crazy. I thought about sticking it out but its not getting any better.
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MNMum 01:19 PM 01-12-2012
I termed a baby after 4 months of trying to make him happy here. Mom was soooooo mad, she never spoke to me again. Dad was understanding. I worded it with her child's best interest in mind. Termed on a Friday, she had a nanny by Monday!
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Breezy 01:27 PM 01-12-2012
You would think a mother would be devestated her child is so upset. I know I would be! Poor baby!!

Good luck!!
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PitterPatter 06:06 PM 01-12-2012
Originally Posted by KBCsMommy:
So Ive decided to terminate my DC baby. Im giving notice today since dcm has a 4 day weekend. Ive given them a 2 week notice with the last week of January as their day.

Should I have a meeting with dcm. Ive written up a general letter that says:

Dear DC Family,

I regret to inform you that I can no longer provide dadycare services for @@@@. It has been a pleasure watching him grow and working with your family. It is with a heavy heart that I have come to this decision.

Sincerely,
Daycare Provider



Should I just give them the letter when dc baby gets picked up.

Is it going to be weird for the next few weeks?

Im just wondering because I raised my rates in January and when I gave the family notice in November dcm didnt talk to me for 2 days. I guess she got over it because they signed the contract and didnt question it.

How have families reacted when you gave them 2 week notices?
Have you already had dicussions with DCM about the problem that brought this up?

I try to work around issues as much as possible and let parents know the possibility of terming. If things don't get better and I absolutley have to term then I do so with at least 2 week notice and try to make it on a Friday at pick up so they have the weekend to cool their jets so to speak. I speak with them and hand them the written term letter.

I haven't termed much but when I have it's ugly. They take offense no matter how much I sugar coat it. Even with using a time change that they could not possible fit in for the excuse DCM still snapped. BUT I know others who have termed and it went well.

Good luck to you hope it goes well!!
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PitterPatter 06:08 PM 01-12-2012
Originally Posted by KBCsMommy:
Thanks for responding ladies...

Im terminating because this child is just not happy here. He doesnt sleep. He screams and cries all day long because he has the worst seperation anxiety I have ever seen. He is so stressed out by the end of the day his little hands are shaking from nerves.

The other kids are now affected by it. Everytime he starts crying, the others start crying.

My own kids are affected by this, the first thing they say when they get home is how was **** today?

Also dcmom keeps saying shes going to quit her job so she can stay home too. So I never know if they are coming back or not!!!

Ive had several conversations with mom about him. She says hes fine at home and has no problems with him at all. And he sleeps like an angel.
I have a very hard time believing her.

I think this child would be much better off with a nanny or with grandma so he can be coddled and get the attention he needs.

I hope they are not surprised, if they are surprised then all my conversations have fell on deaf ears, and I feel sorry for this child to have parents that are not understanding of his needs.
Sorry I really must starte reading the whole thread of replies before I respond.

I think the Mom will understand since it's for the best interest of her own child.
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saved4always 06:29 PM 01-12-2012
I was actually thinking about terming a DCF last week but they "fired" me first. They were not happy that I changed my contract for 2012 saying that they would have to pay for "snow days" (all my clients are teachers and I am still here willing to watch their kids if there is a snow day for thier district) and also that they would have 3 "free" sick days and then would have to pay me half a day for every sick day after that. Before this, they only paid when their children were here. Snow days and sick days (theirs, not mine...they still don't have to pay if I am sick, on vacation or if there is a holiday) killed me financially last year. Then, the mother decided that DCB who is 2 1/2 is going to be potty training over break. She insisted he would come after break in underwear and I was to "put him on the potty" every 30 to 45 minutes. I had the audacity to say that every 30 to 45 minutes could not happen because I have other children to care for here, that we could "try" it with underwear and I would remind him to go after each transition, but that he would have to go back into diapers or pull ups if he had accidents. This caused a "lively" email exchange that resulted in the silent treatment from mom and dad calling to tell me the kids would not be there the following week; grandma was going to stay the week and watch them. The following weekend, dad called again to say they were "going in a different direction with childcare". I told him I was actually thinking about quitting because of the angry vibes I was getting from them. He seemed a little surprised. Anyways..I am sooooo happy not to have them. There was no way I was going to let any child pee all over my house because mom read that pull ups are bad and feels that "as HER childcare provider" I should help her with this. We never even got as far as me suggesting pull ups over the underwear...it was her way of the high way. I am currently working on a potty training policy for my other families that will not include me putting a child on the potty every 30 minutes nor will it include underwear before stayting dry for a period of time.
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momma2girls 06:47 PM 01-12-2012
Originally Posted by ALM:
I was actually thinking about terming a DCF last week but they "fired" me first. They were not happy that I changed my contract for 2012 saying that they would have to pay for "snow days" (all my clients are teachers and I am still here willing to watch their kids if there is a snow day for thier district) and also that they would have 3 "free" sick days and then would have to pay me half a day for every sick day after that. Before this, they only paid when their children were here. Snow days and sick days (theirs, not mine...they still don't have to pay if I am sick, on vacation or if there is a holiday) killed me financially last year. Then, the mother decided that DCB who is 2 1/2 is going to be potty training over break. She insisted he would come after break in underwear and I was to "put him on the potty" every 30 to 45 minutes. I had the audacity to say that every 30 to 45 minutes could not happen because I have other children to care for here, that we could "try" it with underwear and I would remind him to go after each transition, but that he would have to go back into diapers or pull ups if he had accidents. This caused a "lively" email exchange that resulted in the silent treatment from mom and dad calling to tell me the kids would not be there the following week; grandma was going to stay the week and watch them. The following weekend, dad called again to say they were "going in a different direction with childcare". I told him I was actually thinking about quitting because of the angry vibes I was getting from them. He seemed a little surprised. Anyways..I am sooooo happy not to have them. There was no way I was going to let any child pee all over my house because mom read that pull ups are bad and feels that "as HER childcare provider" I should help her with this. We never even got as far as me suggesting pull ups over the underwear...it was her way of the high way. I am currently working on a potty training policy for my other families that will not include me putting a child on the potty every 30 minutes nor will it include underwear before stayting dry for a period of time.
I placed this in my contract about 2 yrs. ago, and I am so glad I did.
I will assist with potty training, this needs to be started at home, and child making good progress and totally understnad the concept of it, before I will assist with it here.Pullups/diapers are required at all times, untill totally potty trained(this means goes on their own, without assistance and reminders from myself, and accident free for quite some time.
I think this is so great, I had to share it with you all!!!
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KBCsMommy 07:45 PM 01-12-2012
I talked to dcm and things went surprisingly well. I told her dcb wasn't happy here, and he is too stressed. She agreed and said they knew he wasn't happy either. She even asked what I thought they should do with him.
I told her he would do really well with a nanny or a family friend they trusted and dcb was familiar with. So it went pretty well!!

I really hope we are all able to stay friendly. The lil guy is a doll when hes all by himself, I would take him back in a heartbeat when hes over his seperation issues!!
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KBCsMommy 07:47 PM 01-12-2012
Originally Posted by ALM:
I was actually thinking about terming a DCF last week but they "fired" me first. They were not happy that I changed my contract for 2012 saying that they would have to pay for "snow days" (all my clients are teachers and I am still here willing to watch their kids if there is a snow day for thier district) and also that they would have 3 "free" sick days and then would have to pay me half a day for every sick day after that. Before this, they only paid when their children were here. Snow days and sick days (theirs, not mine...they still don't have to pay if I am sick, on vacation or if there is a holiday) killed me financially last year. Then, the mother decided that DCB who is 2 1/2 is going to be potty training over break. She insisted he would come after break in underwear and I was to "put him on the potty" every 30 to 45 minutes. I had the audacity to say that every 30 to 45 minutes could not happen because I have other children to care for here, that we could "try" it with underwear and I would remind him to go after each transition, but that he would have to go back into diapers or pull ups if he had accidents. This caused a "lively" email exchange that resulted in the silent treatment from mom and dad calling to tell me the kids would not be there the following week; grandma was going to stay the week and watch them. The following weekend, dad called again to say they were "going in a different direction with childcare". I told him I was actually thinking about quitting because of the angry vibes I was getting from them. He seemed a little surprised. Anyways..I am sooooo happy not to have them. There was no way I was going to let any child pee all over my house because mom read that pull ups are bad and feels that "as HER childcare provider" I should help her with this. We never even got as far as me suggesting pull ups over the underwear...it was her way of the high way. I am currently working on a potty training policy for my other families that will not include me putting a child on the potty every 30 minutes nor will it include underwear before stayting dry for a period of time.
"Anticipation" Training is training for adults not for kids!!!!
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saved4always 12:19 PM 01-16-2012
Originally Posted by KBCsMommy:
"Anticipation" Training is training for adults not for kids!!!!
I always call it "parent-training"....lol! The parent is trained to put the child on the potty to avoid accidents.
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