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Old 01-20-2015, 09:45 AM
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daycarediva daycarediva is offline
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Default Lying 4 Year Old...

He is developmentally more like a 3. Just getting potty trained, expressive language is closer to his real age, but I strongly feel his receptive language is delayed. He can't follow a 2 step direction, and often has difficulty with a 1 step direction. He is diagnosed as ADHD, which I disagree with. There is a definite delay in gross and fine motor, social and self help skills. There are sensory issues as well. Because of this, I treat him as a young 3 and group him with the 2's and 3's and not my 4's during activities. His parents have noticed this, which is a whole different thread and I'll save you my rant on their assessment of his skills.

He is starting to say off the wall, impossible to be true things. It happened once in fall... he said dcb took him behind the playhouse and waved his (private part word) at him. 1. We were all playing kickball together. 2. There is no behind my playhouse, it's pushed right up against the fence to prevent blind spots in my supervision. 3. The dcb in question was in my eye sight the entire time we were outside. I emailed his mother about it, and addressed it with dcb. Difference between truth/lie, etc.

Now he is saying that certain kids are hitting him. Last week, out of NOWHERE he walked up to a child's parent at pickup time and said "E smacked me in the face today really hard!" the parent looked HORRIFIED as E is seriously the SWEETEST child in the world and has NEVER been physical. I said no, of course not. Discussed lying with dcb. Emailed parent. Parent wanted to know if it was possible and I had not seen it. Not really. I have a video monitor for when I plate lunch and potty, and dcb is VERY VERY fair, he marks up easily and is a screamer at the slightest injury.

Now it's different stories all the time, he is literally spinning tales all day. Today at circle during his share time, he shared that a ghost came into his house and cut his Dad's head off with a knife. I stopped the story there. His share time was over. He is lying CONSTANTLY about EVERYTHING. I didn't give him breakfast, C is spitting at him, D said a bad word, E is taking his toys. Of course, I'm watching for these things, and none of it is happening. I just emailed Mom again. I don't think he REALLY understands that what he is doing it wrong. He acts like a YOUNG 3. Of course, all it takes is ONE false allegation to make my life you-know-what.

Term? work with parents? There are other issues with both child and parent, but both have been workable thus far.
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Old 01-20-2015, 09:49 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daycarediva View Post
He is developmentally more like a 3. Just getting potty trained, expressive language is closer to his real age, but I strongly feel his receptive language is delayed. He can't follow a 2 step direction, and often has difficulty with a 1 step direction. He is diagnosed as ADHD, which I disagree with. There is a definite delay in gross and fine motor, social and self help skills. There are sensory issues as well. Because of this, I treat him as a young 3 and group him with the 2's and 3's and not my 4's during activities. His parents have noticed this, which is a whole different thread and I'll save you my rant on their assessment of his skills.

He is starting to say off the wall, impossible to be true things. It happened once in fall... he said dcb took him behind the playhouse and waved his (private part word) at him. 1. We were all playing kickball together. 2. There is no behind my playhouse, it's pushed right up against the fence to prevent blind spots in my supervision. 3. The dcb in question was in my eye sight the entire time we were outside. I emailed his mother about it, and addressed it with dcb. Difference between truth/lie, etc.

Now he is saying that certain kids are hitting him. Last week, out of NOWHERE he walked up to a child's parent at pickup time and said "E smacked me in the face today really hard!" the parent looked HORRIFIED as E is seriously the SWEETEST child in the world and has NEVER been physical. I said no, of course not. Discussed lying with dcb. Emailed parent. Parent wanted to know if it was possible and I had not seen it. Not really. I have a video monitor for when I plate lunch and potty, and dcb is VERY VERY fair, he marks up easily and is a screamer at the slightest injury.

Now it's different stories all the time, he is literally spinning tales all day. Today at circle during his share time, he shared that a ghost came into his house and cut his Dad's head off with a knife. I stopped the story there. His share time was over. He is lying CONSTANTLY about EVERYTHING. I didn't give him breakfast, C is spitting at him, D said a bad word, E is taking his toys. Of course, I'm watching for these things, and none of it is happening. I just emailed Mom again. I don't think he REALLY understands that what he is doing it wrong. He acts like a YOUNG 3. Of course, all it takes is ONE false allegation to make my life you-know-what.

Term? work with parents? There are other issues with both child and parent, but both have been workable thus far.
Definitely term. I wouldn't want the liability of this kid. Next time it's going to be touching his private parts or slapping him.
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Old 01-20-2015, 10:10 AM
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I couldn't keep a child that lied that much. It sounds like his parents know he is lying but what if he tells someone else a lie and they report you...a lot could go wrong
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Old 01-20-2015, 10:32 AM
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Kids lie but to go to the extent that this child is would make me want to term . The lie about the other child behind the shed is the scary part , who knows what lie would come out next .
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Old 01-20-2015, 10:33 AM
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His parents have noticed this, which is a whole different thread and I'll save you my rant on their assessment of his skills.

rant away.
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Old 01-20-2015, 10:52 AM
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you asked!

He's definitely got me stumped. He can recite a TON of information, but he can't actually apply any to real life (I strongly feel he is on the spectrum). Eg He can rote count to 100. Crazy, but he CANNOT count accurately to 3. He can recognize numerals, but he can't put them in order (eg. 3, 4, 5) He can spell his name, all of the other kids names, and knows all of the letters, but he can't answer simple questions. Eg. BLUE what letter does that start with? (shakes head or doesn't answer) if I showed him just the B or covered it, he would get it. He can't tell similarities or differences, and just started to be capable of marking a paper with a crayon. He seems to have a photographic memory sometimes, but at other times (short term memory) he struggles with 'What did we eat for breakfast?' at circle time 30 minutes later but he can tell you ACCURATELY and with detail, about a field trip that was months ago. He still does a lot of parallel play, where he appears to be playing 'with' another child... but actually isn't. He really struggles socially, won't listen to limits set by peers, won't alter play schemes, repeats word for word what I have said to him to help him get through sharing eg. "HISNAME would like a turn with that toy. Can HISNAME have a turn now?" He loses his train of thought during a direction and will wander aimlessly or just stand there halfway through. Eg he often forgets how to wash his hands, so when he finishes attempting to potty, he will just stand there until I give him SPECIFIC directions. He repeats tv shows/movies WORD.FOR.WORD.

My 4's are working on letter formation/sounds, sight words, and counting 10-20. His Mom picked up during centers one day, and saw him at the table with 2-3's. She got really upset when she walked over and saw him with manipulatives and a #5 card (he had to match 5 penguins to the penguins on the card. She emailed me about it, and I sent home the exact center he was using so she could see for herself. She responded back that evening. It was just too boring for him so he didn't want to do it. They think he has ADHD and is a GENIUS. I cannot even bring up an alternate idea without her scoffing and telling me how he said/did X, Y, Z. Conferences are.....interesting.
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