Daycare.com Forum Kidacare by Minute Menu Force of Nature Disinfectant HiMama Childcare App

Go Back   Daycare.com Forum > Main Category > Daycare Center and Family Home Forum

Daycare Center and Family Home Forum Daycare Center and Family Home owners, Directors, Operators and Assistants should post and ask questions here.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 08-02-2018, 12:38 PM
Unregistered
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Question Intentional puking

Need advice how do you handle a three yearold who pukes on purpose? Last week it was at snack and now at lunch. Need to nip this pronto! How to address this with the parent? Only have a few weeks left as this kid is headed to preschool Thank God! Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants. Advice please!!!
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 08-02-2018, 12:45 PM
Cat Herder's Avatar
Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 11,635
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
Need advice how do you handle a three yearold who pukes on purpose? Last week it was at snack and now at lunch. Need to nip this pronto! How to address this with the parent? Only have a few weeks left as this kid is headed to preschool Thank God! Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants. Advice please!!!
"Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants." - That is what I'd do. Send him home. Vomiting = Go home.

It would be up to the parents to make it NOT what he wants.

Parent: It's a verb.
__________________
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 08-02-2018, 12:46 PM
amberrose3dg's Avatar
amberrose3dg amberrose3dg is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: somewhere
Posts: 1,347
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
"Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants." - That is what I'd do. Send him home. Vomiting = Go home.

It would be up to the parents to make it NOT what he wants.

Parent: It's a verb.

same here
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 08-02-2018, 12:53 PM
boy_mom's Avatar
boy_mom boy_mom is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2017
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 198
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
"Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants." - That is what I'd do. Send him home. Vomiting = Go home.

It would be up to the parents to make it NOT what he wants.

Parent: It's a verb.
Say its again louder for the people in the back!!!!
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:01 PM
storybookending's Avatar
storybookending storybookending is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,476
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
Parent: It's a verb.
I am SO stealing this quote
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:12 PM
LysesKids's Avatar
LysesKids LysesKids is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: May 2014
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 2,836
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
"Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants." - That is what I'd do. Send him home. Vomiting = Go home.

It would be up to the parents to make it NOT what he wants.

Parent: It's a verb.
Yep... I send home for symptoms & vomiting, regardless of cause, is one of them
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:12 PM
Unregistered
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Question

How do you address it with the pissed parent who has to pick up a kid who isn't sick?
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:17 PM
Ariana's Avatar
Ariana Ariana is online now
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 8,240
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
How do you address it with the pissed parent who has to pick up a kid who isn't sick?
Ignore their tantrum. If they signed a contract that states that sick kids go home then they are responsible. I would treat this as if the kid is sick. Vomitting must mean they are sick.

Another option is to completely ignore this kids vomitting. I had a kid who would vomit to get attention from tantrumming and ignoring it made it stop.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:18 PM
Blackcat31's Avatar
Blackcat31 Blackcat31 is offline
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 18,567
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
Need advice how do you handle a three yearold who pukes on purpose? Last week it was at snack and now at lunch. Need to nip this pronto! How to address this with the parent? Only have a few weeks left as this kid is headed to preschool Thank God! Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants. Advice please!!!
Why does that matter to you as the provider?

I'm not being rude or snarky.....I genuinely want to know why a provider's feels this way. I know we don't like to "give in" to a child any more than a child likes to not have control but if the reason for not sending home is simply due to not giving the child what he/she needs then I think it's a silly reason.

Why can't he have what he wants (home)?
He's clearly figured out a way to get what he wants (you didn't teach him or support his methods) so if it works with his parents, why not remove yourself from the whole situation since you played no part in it and let the parents figure it out.... I mean, I certainly wouldn't want to clean up puke.

Regardless of whether it is illness puke or intentional puke.

Puke = call for pick up.

If parents protest, tell them you played no role in teaching him (or using consequences) that it works so why would they expect you to deal with it?

I send home due to symptoms NOT diagnosis and if a child pukes, I am not a doctor so I can't say whether it was due to illness or intent.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:22 PM
Blackcat31's Avatar
Blackcat31 Blackcat31 is offline
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 18,567
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
How do you address it with the pissed parent who has to pick up a kid who isn't sick?
When they tell you or express they are upset for having to come pick up a child that isn't sick say "Yeah, imagine how I feel having puke on my carpet from a child that isn't mine and don't know for certain isn't sick."

They should be embarrassed and feel bad for you.

Not the other way around.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:25 PM
Ariana's Avatar
Ariana Ariana is online now
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 8,240
Default

I had a mom who tried to convince me that her crying kid should not be sent home because she is getting what she wants. I termed her two weeks later A mom who does not want to deal with their kids behavioral issues is not someone I want in my daycare.
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:39 PM
Blackcat31's Avatar
Blackcat31 Blackcat31 is offline
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 18,567
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ariana View Post
I had a mom who tried to convince me that her crying kid should not be sent home because she is getting what she wants. I termed her two weeks later A mom who does not want to deal with their kids behavioral issues is not someone I want in my daycare.
This is really no different than any other behavioral issue (other than the ick factor).

Provider's shouldn't be the ones that have to deal with a LEARNED behavior. Especially one that is clearly reinforced (intentionally or unintentionally) by the parent.

Intentionally puking IS a learned behavior.

If this were any other learned behavior such as spitting, hitting, swearing etc.....the child would be terminated if it happened on a regular basis. Some would be immediate termination.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:42 PM
Cat Herder's Avatar
Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 11,635
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
How do you address it with the pissed parent who has to pick up a kid who isn't sick?
I tell them I understand parenting is hard, I've raised 3 myself. That, hopefully, they can get it under control quickly since it is a pretty common behavioral issue in preschool and younger elementary aged kids. I tell them they have it better than those parents whose kids figure out that if they mess their pants, become violent with friends or destroy property, they get to go home, too.

They generally crack a smile, here, and relay a story of themselves or their sibling faking sick to get out of doing something they did not want to do.

None of the discussion would ever be done in front of the child. It would be on the porch, before entering the playroom. THAT is very important.

It is about the kids needs for parenting. Not the parents want for convenience. It is one of the very first hurdles to public school attendance. Behavioral expectations. Parenting.
__________________
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 08-02-2018, 01:44 PM
Cat Herder's Avatar
Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 11,635
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by storybookending View Post
I am SO stealing this quote
Steal away. It is not mine. It is Gerry Brook's. He wants everyone to steal it. https://www.facebook.com/gerrybrooks...7834137426182/

I bought the T-Shirt. With sparkle letters.
__________________
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 08-02-2018, 02:13 PM
amberrose3dg's Avatar
amberrose3dg amberrose3dg is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: somewhere
Posts: 1,347
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
I tell them I understand parenting is hard, I've raised 3 myself. That, hopefully, they can get it under control quickly since it is a pretty common behavioral issue in preschool and younger elementary aged kids. I tell them they have it better than those parents whose kids figure out that if they mess their pants, become violent with friends or destroy property, they get to go home, too.

They generally crack a smile, here, and relay a story of themselves or their sibling faking sick to get out of doing something they did not want to do.

None of the discussion would ever be done in front of the child. It would be on the porch, before entering the playroom. THAT is very important.

It is about the kids needs for parenting. Not the parents want for convenience. It is one of the very first hurdles to public school attendance. Behavioral expectations. Parenting.
Excuse my language but why the hell should you be cleaning up puke? I wish a parent would get mad about coming to get their child that just puked all over my house.
That is their issue to sort out, not yours. It continued. I'd terminate.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 08-02-2018, 02:24 PM
Meeko's Avatar
Meeko Meeko is online now
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Utah
Posts: 4,196
Default

Puke is puke. Nasty, dirty stuff and you can't have it around the other kids in your care. Junior goes home. Every. Single. Time. Until said time his parents figure out how to stop it. That's not your job.
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 08-02-2018, 02:35 PM
Meeko's Avatar
Meeko Meeko is online now
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: Utah
Posts: 4,196
Default

Many. many moons ago (before I did daycare), my husband's brother and family came to stay with us for a couple days on their way across country. My brother-in-law was a brat and unfortunately his kids were even worse.

His son was about three or four and used throwing up as his way to get anything he wanted. We were going to dinner in the car and the kid started wailing for something (I don't even remember what about...just that it was silly)

My no nonsense, military husband had had enough. He quickly pulled over, stopped the car, turned around and said (loudly)
"If you puke in my car, I will come round there, get you out of the car and leave you on the side of the road and you can walk home. Do. you. understand. me?"

It was met with vigorous nodding.

(This was pre daycare/politically correct days)

According to my brother-in-law...he never did it again.

Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 08-02-2018, 03:06 PM
e.j.'s Avatar
e.j. e.j. is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 3,340
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
It would be up to the parents to make it NOT what he wants.
I really like how you think!

This thread reminds me of a 3 year old dcb I had years ago. He was my neighbor's nephew and I agreed to take him as a drop in one day. My neighbor asked what I was giving the kids for lunch and when I told her, she said, "Oh no! He hates that! He's going to make himself puke."

Sure enough, as soon as I put his plate in front of him, he started trying. I looked him in the eye and quietly but firmly said, "Don't. You. Dare. If you puke, I will not pick it up for you. You will be the one who picks it up." I think I had the element of surprise on my side; I doubt he expected me to react the way I did and so quickly. We had a stare-off for a few seconds and then he settled in and ate his entire lunch! I was so glad my neighbor had warned me and that dcb didn't test me! It was when I first started out doing day care so I probably would have kept him instead of calling his parents. I wouldn't do that now.
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 08-02-2018, 03:17 PM
Leigh's Avatar
Leigh Leigh is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 3,794
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by e.j. View Post
I really like how you think!

This thread reminds me of a 3 year old dcb I had years ago. He was my neighbor's nephew and I agreed to take him as a drop in one day. My neighbor asked what I was giving the kids for lunch and when I told her, she said, "Oh no! He hates that! He's going to make himself puke."

Sure enough, as soon as I put his plate in front of him, he started trying. I looked him in the eye and quietly but firmly said, "Don't. You. Dare. If you puke, I will not pick it up for you. You will be the one who picks it up." I think I had the element of surprise on my side; I doubt he expected me to react the way I did and so quickly. We had a stare-off for a few seconds and then he settled in and ate his entire lunch! I was so glad my neighbor had warned me and that dcb didn't test me! It was when I first started out doing day care so I probably would have kept him instead of calling his parents. I wouldn't do that now.
This is exactly how I stopped the 2 kids I used to have who pooped their pants when they were told no or didn't get their way (4 year olds). They actually did clean it up. The pooping stopped.
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 08-02-2018, 09:40 PM
AmyKidsCo's Avatar
AmyKidsCo AmyKidsCo is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 3,539
Default

Honestly, if he's headed to preschool it won't be your issue anymore. I exclude for symptoms and puking is a symptom. Not to mention unsanitary for the other children. ITA with everyone else - let it become the parents' problem. Besides, the one time you decide not to send him home so he won't get what he wants he'll probably really be sick and get everyone else sick too.
Reply With Quote
  #21  
Old 08-02-2018, 09:55 PM
Unregistered
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Meeko View Post
Many. many moons ago (before I did daycare), my husband's brother and family came to stay with us for a couple days on their way across country. My brother-in-law was a brat and unfortunately his kids were even worse.

His son was about three or four and used throwing up as his way to get anything he wanted. We were going to dinner in the car and the kid started wailing for something (I don't even remember what about...just that it was silly)

My no nonsense, military husband had had enough. He quickly pulled over, stopped the car, turned around and said (loudly)
"If you puke in my car, I will come round there, get you out of the car and leave you on the side of the road and you can walk home. Do. you. understand. me?"

It was met with vigorous nodding.

(This was pre daycare/politically correct days)

According to my brother-in-law...he never did it again.

My brother did that once. He stuck his finger down his throat to get out of something. I can't remember what. My dad made him eat it. Honestly, I feel we baby kids too much now a days.
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 08-03-2018, 11:37 AM
daycarediva's Avatar
daycarediva daycarediva is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 11,377
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Meeko View Post
Many. many moons ago (before I did daycare), my husband's brother and family came to stay with us for a couple days on their way across country. My brother-in-law was a brat and unfortunately his kids were even worse.

His son was about three or four and used throwing up as his way to get anything he wanted. We were going to dinner in the car and the kid started wailing for something (I don't even remember what about...just that it was silly)

My no nonsense, military husband had had enough. He quickly pulled over, stopped the car, turned around and said (loudly)
"If you puke in my car, I will come round there, get you out of the car and leave you on the side of the road and you can walk home. Do. you. understand. me?"

It was met with vigorous nodding.

(This was pre daycare/politically correct days)

According to my brother-in-law...he never did it again.

Quote:
Originally Posted by e.j. View Post
I really like how you think!

This thread reminds me of a 3 year old dcb I had years ago. He was my neighbor's nephew and I agreed to take him as a drop in one day. My neighbor asked what I was giving the kids for lunch and when I told her, she said, "Oh no! He hates that! He's going to make himself puke."

Sure enough, as soon as I put his plate in front of him, he started trying. I looked him in the eye and quietly but firmly said, "Don't. You. Dare. If you puke, I will not pick it up for you. You will be the one who picks it up." I think I had the element of surprise on my side; I doubt he expected me to react the way I did and so quickly. We had a stare-off for a few seconds and then he settled in and ate his entire lunch! I was so glad my neighbor had warned me and that dcb didn't test me! It was when I first started out doing day care so I probably would have kept him instead of calling his parents. I wouldn't do that now.

***CLAPPING***

Natural consequences.

I had a child do this recently (and still starts once in a blue moon...)

I looked him straight in the face and calmly said "If you vomit, you'll clean it up. Understand me?"

He stopped.

He pulled it at pick up in my entryway when I refused to give him 'a treat' and Mom didn't have one in the car. Mom went to coddle/baby him and was reassuringly telling him they would GO GET A TREAT when I interrupted and said "CHILD'SNAME, ENOUGH."

He stopped immediately.
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 08-16-2018, 03:29 PM
Lissa Kristine's Avatar
Lissa Kristine Lissa Kristine is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2017
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 57
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
"Can't send him home because that would be giving him what he wants." - That is what I'd do. Send him home. Vomiting = Go home.

It would be up to the parents to make it NOT what he wants.

Parent: It's a verb.
I would probably have too much fun punishing a child who tried to pull this on me.

First off, any dairy products are now off-limits. No milk. No cheese. No yogurt.

No sweets or treats of any kind.

While waiting to be picked up, he's kept away from the other kids. He might want to play whatever game is happening, but he needs to be kept away because he's "sick."

If it's my own kid and I have to pick him up from school, it's the BRAT diet [which I've heard isn't even the best thing to give to a sick kid, but I feel like "I know you want ice cream, but you're sick and ice cream isn't good for your tummy" would help to drive the point home.


When I was 6, I had a major anger management problem. I had a hard time controlling my temper, and we had a system in place to help me. One of the things in my plan was that if I had two strikes where I lost my temper (I had a little yellow triangle that I could take off the blackboard; it was my hall pass to go to the guidance counselor if I caught myself, but if I was TOLD to get my triangle twice in one day, I had to be sent home). I agreed beforehand that if I was sent home, my punishment would be that I had to stay in bed all day. No books (I was reading chapter books at that time- my favorite were "The Babysitter's Club Little Sister" series books), no toys, NOTHING. I was allowed to leave my bed to eat and to use the bathroom.

I was sent home once, and my mom followed through. She had my friends over (she was their babysitter) and I wasn't allowed to play with them. I was stuck in bed with nothing to do until it was time to go to school the next morning. (And I'm sure the first thing I had to do when I arrived at school was apologize to my teacher.

That was the first and last time I was ever sent home from school for losing my temper.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
intentional vomiting, parenting, puking on purpose, purposeful vomiting, throw up, vomiting

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
How Do You Deal With Intentional Damage? Unregistered Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 13 06-05-2018 12:47 PM
Own child puking Indoorvoice Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 2 02-01-2016 09:59 AM
Day 3 of NO puking! AuntTami Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 1 10-15-2014 05:45 PM
puking cara041083 Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 5 02-28-2014 09:08 AM
No Sleeping, Crying, Eventually Puking! Unregistered Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 1 02-01-2010 04:08 PM


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 04:02 AM.



Daycare.com         Find A Daycare         List Your Daycare         Toys & Products                 About Us

Daycare.com
Please read our Disclaimer before continuing.

Topics pertain mainly to the following States:

Alabama Alaska Arizona Arkansas California Colorado Connecticut Delaware District of Columbia Florida Georgia Hawaii Idaho Illinois Indiana Iowa Kansas Kentucky Louisiana Maine Maryland Massachusetts Michigan Minnesota Mississippi Missouri Montana Nebraska Nevada New Hampshire New Jersey New Mexico New York North Carolina North Dakota Ohio Oklahoma Oregon Pennsylvania Rhode Island South Carolina South Dakota Tennessee Texas Utah Vermont Virginia Washington West Virginia Wisconsin Wyoming