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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Feeding Oreos to a 10 Month Old
Unregistered 11:44 AM 05-13-2015
I logged out, but I have posted on this family before. Baby is breastfed and was not drinking much, but just wanting table food. I kind of fixed that issue. He seemed to not like laying back for the bottle, so I sit him up so he can see everyone and he is now drinking a little more. New problem and still food related. Mom told me last night that dad feeds him oreos, so his poop may be extra dark! This is after she told me he got ahold of a botte of ranch dressing the night before and drank 3/4 of it! His diapers were terrible and I can only imagine how his little tummy felt. I am so confused. Mom is an attachment parent, extended breast feeding type mom, yet she has no issues giving him junk food. Cheetos, oreos, ice cream, ect. These are the ones that I know of. Low and behold, dcb won't eat veggies or anything remotely healthy that I serve. Because of this, I really push the BM, because he is getting no nutrition from mom and dad. I am just not sure what to do. I actually really like his parents, but they cannot be that clueless that it is not a good idea to feed a 10 month old so many oreos that their poop turns black! Mom also told me last night that he has been staying up till 11 and that he was so fussy last night, she put a crib mattress on the floor to sleep on and the baby slept in her bed. What?! I told her she needs to put that crib mattress in a crib and put baby in it! He sleeps here in a crib by himself with no issues. He is also the baby who is here 13 hours a day, so going to bed at 11 when he has to be brought here by 5:15 is ridiculous and I am just shaking my head at it. I think I just needed to vent, but any advice if you have been there, done that, would be appreciated!
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Lorna 12:01 PM 05-13-2015
i've had parents like that. Cheesies for breakfast. Its not my house or my kids I can only control what happens in my house. Now if the oreos come in your front door. Hand them back to the parent. But its none of your business what they feed their kids at home.
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TheGoodLife 12:14 PM 05-13-2015
Um, you're not even supposed to give chocolate to babies under a year, anyways!
Wow, sorry you are dealing with such bad food issues, so hard to do anything other than try to give advice if the parents don't get angry.
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Unregistered 12:22 PM 05-13-2015
Originally Posted by Lorna:
i've had parents like that. Cheesies for breakfast. Its not my house or my kids I can only control what happens in my house. Now if the oreos come in your front door. Hand them back to the parent. But its none of your business what they feed their kids at home.
I know I cannot control what they feed him at home, but it IS my business. I have this kid 13 hours a day, every day.

And mom does not take well to advice, so venting on here helps a little, since there is not much I can do about it. Mom is one of those first time moms who calls herself a "momma bear" and knows everything about kids. I guess my 17 years of childcare experience makes me an amateur compared to her!
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Play Care 12:45 PM 05-13-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I know I cannot control what they feed him at home, but it IS my business. I have this kid 13 hours a day, every day.

And mom does not take well to advice, so venting on here helps a little, since there is not much I can do about it. Mom is one of those first time moms who calls herself a "momma bear" and knows everything about kids. I guess my 17 years of childcare experience makes me an amateur compared to her!
I would probably look to replace. The fact is you have no control over what she's feeding him (or allowing him to get in to ) but you have to deal with the fall out.
She clearly is clueless and I imagine it will only get worse. I see this conversation in your future "I know he's only 18 months, but he refused to leave the house unless I gave him a can of Mountain Dew to drink! Isn't he so funny/clever/smart? Just in case he seems a little wild today!"
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hope 01:09 PM 05-13-2015
The fact that the child is with you 13 hours a day is reason enough to term.
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preschoolteacher 01:27 PM 05-13-2015
I agree. The fact that he's with you 13 hours per day would be a big problem for me. Plus the fact that they keep him up late/are enabling poor sleeping skills/are feeding him crap. I'm impressed you're dealing with it!

I can just imagine a cranky, poorly-slept, poorly-fed baby with big, gross diapers because of all the junk they're feeding him with me for 13 hours per day. It would be horrible. I'd be looking to replace immediately.
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mommyneedsadayoff 01:31 PM 05-13-2015
Originally Posted by Play Care:
I would probably look to replace. The fact is you have no control over what she's feeding him (or allowing him to get in to ) but you have to deal with the fall out.
She clearly is clueless and I imagine it will only get worse. I see this conversation in your future "I know he's only 18 months, but he refused to leave the house unless I gave him a can of Mountain Dew to drink! Isn't he so funny/clever/smart? Just in case he seems a little wild today!"
Lol! That is what I was thinking too! My only issue with terming is that I realy care about this little dude. I have had him since 6 weeks and when his mom asked if I could do the new schedule, I was super wary and told her I would have to think on it. I decided to do it and we came to a payment agreement, so I get paid well and they always pay on time. I just feel bad for him, because they are feeding him crap. Then when she comes in the morning, she says he was fussy all night and didn't sleep well and she thinks it is a growth spurt or the infamous teething. I am like, NO, it is the bottle of ranch dressing he just drank and the oreos he had for dessert! I feel like the fact that he is at my house so long is actually better for him food wise, since it is the only place he gets healthy food, minus breast milk at home. I guess I will just continue to do what I feel is right for him and hope they take my subtle hints about a healthy diet and sleep habits.
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mommyneedsadayoff 01:33 PM 05-13-2015
I guess I forgot to log out on my last post, but at this point, maybe they will read this board and realize they are in for some issues if they keep up these habits.
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rosieteddy 02:16 PM 05-13-2015
I always print out the guidelines for feeding toddlers chart.I give it to parents and stress that it is the best way to feed.There is really nothing else you can do but feed him well at daycare.
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Shell 06:08 PM 05-13-2015
Ugh! I also was told no chocolate before one.

These parents are a disaster! I know you feel you are feeding him good foods and it does sound like he does better with you (sleeping and eating specifically).

However, they are likely doing whatever is easiest to get them through their very limited time with their child. You can have a firm talk with them about foods that are better, and how they are only making the sleeping situation worse, but some parents will take the easy way out no matter what.

I would also be looking for a replacement- I can't work with parents that aren't willing to work with me, kwim?!
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Josiegirl 02:36 AM 05-14-2015
Have you had an upfront and honest conversation with them? Tell them how bad this junk is for his growing body? Give them some good articles on the relationship between foods, growth, sleep, etc. Is she claiming to be a helicopter parent to make herself sound caring? Yet giving the 10 month old oreos?
No, you cannot control what they do at home but maybe these are young first-time parents who need a little firm guidance to how baby's body grows and needs the good stuff to develop and what the bad stuff can do to their health.
And the sleeping issues...ugh not my favorite thing to deal with. Right now I have 2 dcms who sleep with their kids(ages 2ish) because they'll do anything to keep their child quiet and go to sleep faster. And I'll admit I did the same thing when mine were little, because my dh would get very irritable when they woke him up. One of the dcks does fine here sleeping but the other one takes forever to fall asleep and wakes up if you sneeze.
If you truly want to keep this little one, you need to have an open frank discussion with the dcps, tell them exactly how you feel, because you know what they're doing will affect his sleeping and eating with you too. And it will become more difficult.
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childcaremom 02:45 AM 05-14-2015
The poor little guy.

I agree with above: have a convo about nutrition with mom. Even frame it as it would help him with his stomach and sleeping issues. So not healthy for the little guy.

Personally, I could not work with a family like that. It will get much worse as he gets older
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Unregistered 05:51 AM 05-14-2015
This the OP and I think one of the issues is that dad watches him on the weekend if mom works, and he is so lazy and puts im in his high chair and just loads him up with crap. I will keep mentioning how his tummy seems to hurt, and make some mention of healthy eating, but I have a feeling it will fall on deaf ears. Mom is kind of a know it all, so I will tread lightly, but we have a good relationship, so I may be able to slip it in during conversations with her.

She dropped this morning and told me dcb went to bed at 7 last night and woke up at 1 am and after trying to get him back to sleep for an hour, she gave up and went and laid down in the living room while he played! At 2 in the morning! She said she woke up at 3 and found a bunch of toys int he toilet. (dcb has been walking for a month or so). I laughed it off, but in my head, I was shocked that she would A) let baby get up at 2 am and play and B)fall asleep and leave him to wander the house unsupervised. He needs to be in a crib in his own room! He can play, cry, or do jumping jacks int here for all I care, but the baby monitor would be off and I would have my ear plugs on. At least he would be safe and when he is ready to sleep, he will pass out and sleep. Mom is working long shifts off very little sleep...this won't last long if she doesn't put her foot down. She also said he is comfort nursing at night so much that her nipples are bleeding. I asked her if he is doing it for food or comfort and she told me comfort and I was like, give him his paci and give your boobs a rest lady!
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Tags:attachment parenting problems
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