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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>How Long Is Your "Mandatory" Quiet Time..
DancingQueen 11:19 AM 05-19-2011
What I mean is..

We all have our "quiet time" frame which is the time frame that kids go down until the last one wakes up.

But what if you have a kid that only stays down for 30 minutes. And hasn't the ability to keep quiet for the others?

I'm not having a major issue with this at the moment.. but I can see it in my future the way things are going.

I don't want to be a big meanie - so I want to be reasonable as to the amount of time they are "required" to stay on their quiet time/nap mat without talking or making loud noises.

Lately my 2 that nap on mats in the same room go down with no issue (I predicted MAJOR issues and have been pleasantly surprised). But one doesn't fall asleep until about 30 minutes into nap time (sometimes 40-45). The other falls asleep immediately and is awake in 1 hour normally and does not seem to have the physical ability to keep quiet.. so the other gets no more than 30 minutes nap (on a good day). He doesn't nap at all on the weekends so it isn't the end of the world. However, even though he wakes up in a great mood he is pretty fresh in the afternoons when his naps are cut short. He seems to require about 1 1/4 hour to set him up for the perfect afternoon. So that means he is down for about 30 minutes before he falls asleep so he could require being on that nap mat for about 2 hours in order to get the right amount of sleep for him to functional for the rest of the day.

I know that many have 2-3 hour nap times so this may seem comletely normal to have him on the mat for 2 hours.. but am I being fair to the other child who falls right to sleep and only naps an hour - to expect her to have continued quiet time for another hour?

If I allow her up she wakes everyone up. I don't have someplace else to bring her (1008sq ft house). If I go into the nap room and sit next to her I can just give her the "look" and she'll stay quiet but it is a lot of work and some days I don't know if it is worth it.

Today everyone went down at 12:15. She fell asleep by 12:20. He fell asleep at 12:55.
At 1:25 she was up making noises in the nap room. She talks to herself and that i she talks to him. She'll giggle and say "wake up G..." And eventually he'll wake and they'll play in the nap room.
Today I completely ignored them and let them continue to play until 2 hours were up. But they got pretty loud and woke up my (under 2) napper that naps in another room. And they were getting so loud I was terrified they'd wake baby who was in the living room pnp with me.
I will add that the other 2 that are napping require the full 2 hours as well.

So I guess it is 3 part question.

1) Is it fair to expect child #1 to remain on her nap/quiet mat quietly for the duration of the 2 hours. Which usually means almost another hour after she's woken up from her almost hour nap? If yes, do you have suggestions for a way for me to keep her quiet without staring at her for an hour (because let's face it - that really isn't fun LOL). If you do not think it is fair then do you have suggestions on a way to handle it that will be fair to all of my nappers (and me )?

2)
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Mrs.Ky 11:27 AM 05-19-2011
All kids in daycare HAVE to nap/ lay down for 2 hours no talking, no playing etc. no one gets up till 2pm no exceptions I dont have that problem of anyone waking before 2pm as I only have 2 toddlers in care right now plus mine but she is 3 and doesnt nap and my other 2 are in school.
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ChaserT27 11:40 AM 05-19-2011
Minimum of two hours depending on age and nap child usually takes.

I have separated the children by whom doesn't sleep and who does. If they cause a racket, they are in a room all on their own. The ones that either can be quiet or nap well can go together. I utilize my bed rooms for naps. :0) All but one of my DCK are over one and most are 2.5 and 3

No playing, no wacky business etc. for at least 2 hours. On occasion I have to revise my sleep plans as some all of a sudden can not be together but it is not often.
Mondays - I have an 8 month old whom screams bloody blue murder if not being held so he is in one room and i have to revise the sleep plan. :0( So hoping he grows out of it because Mondays I am always cranky after he has been here awhile - LOL
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AnythingsPossible 01:09 PM 05-19-2011
Curtains get drawn and light music goes on at 12:30, curtains are opened and music goes off at 2:30. If they wake up before the curtains are opened, they know that they need to rest quietly on their mat. As long as they are allowed to be active during the rest of their day, down time in the afternoon isn't going to hurt them.
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spud912 01:49 PM 05-19-2011
How do you all get them to actually stay down and quiet once they wake up?

I have my dd and a dck who cry very loud when they first wake up (1-1 1/2 hours into the nap time) and if I don't allow them up they will wake up everyone. My walls in my house are paper thin and if someone makes barely any noise it is heard throughout the house.
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AnythingsPossible 01:55 PM 05-19-2011
Frankly I don't know "how" i do it. It's kind of like when parent's ask "how" i get them to all nap at the same time. It's just what we do. I have all long term kids who start young and stay till kindergarten or later. So maybe it's just because it is how I've raised them??
When they are young, if they wake up crying, I go and sit by them and rub their back to calm them down, then whisper to them that their friends are still resting and they need to just lay quietly on their mats. Then if they get noisy, I just do a quiet shhhhhh. I have a 2 year old right now who is usually one of the first ones up, she usually looks around to see if anyone else is up, then lays her head on her pillow and zones.
I rarely start kids when they are over 3, but the ones I have I just have to give gentle reminders of the way we do things here. When it is dark, quiet and peaceful it isn't to hard to keep them that way.
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Crystal 02:44 PM 05-19-2011
My children generally all fall asleep and stay asleep for about two hours. On those days when I have a non-napper or an early riser, they are allowed books, puzzles, drawing, etc.

I would NEVER make a child lie quietly for two hours and would be LIVID if anyone ever made my child do so. Children's bodies know what they need, so if they are tired and given a space conducive to resting, they will sleep.

Some kids just don't "need" a nap at all. Others may only need half an hour to refresh and recharge. I am really surprised at how many providers insist that their children lay quietly for two hours.....seems like it would be more work enforcing that than allowing quiet activities.
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DancingQueen 04:34 AM 05-20-2011
Originally Posted by :
I am really surprised athow many providers insist that their children lay quietly for two hours.....seems like it would be more work enforcing that than allowing quiet activities.
If you ask around it really IS the norm. At homes and at centers.

I don't have a problem with a child that doesn't need the sleep waking up and having a quiet activity if it weren't at the expense of another child's sleep. As you mention some kids don't need as much sleep but some kids DO.

Not all providers have the luxury of having a home large enough to accomodate the quiet play kids and the nappers.

Even in the daycare centers that I've used for my own children. quiet time was 2 hours. And no one was allowed off their mat before quiet time because they are all in one HUGE room and the wake ones would wake the nappers.

It really isn't that surprising LOL
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WImom 05:01 AM 05-20-2011
Once mine wake up they come into the other room and I have nap time bins for them with quiet items. They only get one bin a day and if they are loud they go back to their mat.

I have a new girl that is awake the last 45 minutes of nap and she is having trouble with this concept. She plays with the bin for 15 minutes and then packs it up and just looks at me like okay, I'm done, now what. I just tell her she needs to sit down and play with items in the bin. So far she's been okay with lots of 'quiet' reminders.

I have another DCG that is up for the last hour of nap and she's totally content with the nap bin she gets.

They have to be quiet until the shades go up in the nap room. Some of my nappers will still nap with the shades up and noise all around. Makes me wonder if they dont' get enough sleep at home since my nap time is 12:45-3:00/3:15 so I feel they get enough here.
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melskids 05:06 AM 05-20-2011
i have to agree with crystal. and i dont have a large home AT ALL.

we do what we gotta do to make it work. especially on the days the SA are here, and dont nap at all.

could you possibly keep her up a little longer, with a quiet activity and then lay her down later with the others who are already sleeping? i have one 4 yr old (all the rest are WAY younger) and this is what i do. she sits and colors or reads for almost an hour before she goes and lays down. sometimes i even give her quiet chores, or she helps me clean up in the kitchen for a bit before she lays down.

to me, and this is just my opinion, the hassle of making them lay there and be quiet isnt worth it to me. i've got bigger hills to climb

jmo, of course
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Cat Herder 07:01 AM 05-20-2011
Originally Posted by DancingQueen:
But what if you have a kid that only stays down for 30 minutes. And hasn't the ability to keep quiet for the others?

I will term a child who consistently disturbs the rest of the children in care after a reasonable amount of redirection/intervention attempts, over a set time span, without success.

Obviously the child would need a different environment if this is a continued issue. In group care the needs of the entire group trump the needs of the individual. I am not being a "meanie", I just understand the reality of daycare.

I cannot allow one child to keep me from meeting the needs of the rest of the group.


1) Is it fair to expect child #1 to remain on her nap/quiet mat quietly for the duration of the 2 hours. If yes, do you have suggestions for a way for me to keep her quiet without staring at her for an hour (because let's face it - that really isn't fun LOL). If you do not think it is fair then do you have suggestions on a way to handle it that will be fair to all of my nappers (and me )?

Yes, but given a quiet activity such a a book, magna-doodle, dry erase board and marker, aqua-doodle, crayons/coloring book, headphones/storybook on tape, puzzle, etc.... I used do it everyday when I had kiddos in the 3-4 year mark. Right now I have all 2 and under so don't have an issue.

Originally Posted by DancingQueen:
Even in the daycare centers that I've used for my own children. quiet time was 2 hours. And no one was allowed off their mat before quiet time because they are all in one HUGE room and the wake ones would wake the nappers.

It really isn't that surprising LOL
We are all required to be in one large room here. Naptime is supervised time. That is why they have to stay on their mat, not because I enjoy the power trip of being "mean" .

If I allow them up and around then I will not be meeting the needs of the younger children in care.

IME the "early riser" naptime problems don't typically start until age 3.5. To me, If by that age they don't have the ability to quietly sit on their mat and do one of my MANY options (they get to pick ) then the issue is not so much "doesn't need sleep", it is more about "control". YKWIM?

There is always the exception to every rule and I adapt with the goal of meeting the needs of the GROUP.
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boysx5 07:32 AM 05-20-2011
I do two hours rest time as well they all sleep or rest in the same room babies on one side in the cribs and the others on nap mats I put on a movie to start and once they all fall sleep I put on some music they usually will fall asleep and if I have one that doesn't she will stay on her nap mat and just rest. Its something that we have done from the start so they know the routine
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Unregistered 08:27 AM 05-20-2011
All my kids nap from 12:15-2:45 (or 3). Almost everyday I wake them all up at 2:45 and some still are cranky. All the parents know I enforce nap time and quiet time and agree their kids need it. If they get up early they have books next to their mat they can read. I put them out after the kids fall asleep and rarely are they ever used.


I have one child who sleeps 3 hours one day and 1.5 hours the next. I intentionally keep him up 30 min past the others (read/snuggle etc eith him) so that IF he gets up after 1.5 hours he doesnt bother the rest for too long. He stays in bed and reads/snuggles with his stuffy.
I do regular checks and the kids in my care know they arent allowed to get up until nap time is over. I gently remind them its quiet time, read your books, rest, snuggle your buddy etc if they wake. They quickly get the routine.

If I had a child who after lots of effort could not get with the nap routine I would consider dropping them. I have kids in every room of the house already to keep them quiet and resting but if someone screams you couldn't avoid the others hearing it. I think it's unfair to say one child only sleeps 30 min so the rest of the kids have to sufffer and get up too. Children need to learn routines and sometimes that means resting/reading/ being quiet for other peoples sake. Now, if NONE of my group slept more than 30 min or I found they were all awake most of nap time I would adjust accordingly. Nap time for me isnt my 3 hour break, its what the kids need to make it through the rest of the day and evening and I know my parents respect and honor that.
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momma2girls 11:38 AM 05-20-2011
Originally Posted by boysx5:
I do two hours rest time as well they all sleep or rest in the same room babies on one side in the cribs and the others on nap mats I put on a movie to start and once they all fall sleep I put on some music they usually will fall asleep and if I have one that doesn't she will stay on her nap mat and just rest. Its something that we have done from the start so they know the routine
When I have older children, this is what I do as well.
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