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  #1  
Old 11-03-2011, 01:19 PM
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Default Beating By Judge

Have you guys seen this? Unbelievable and sad that a judge who tries cases like this treats his own daughter like that. Good for her for releasing this video.

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/1...c1_lnk3|109662
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  #2  
Old 11-03-2011, 01:48 PM
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He totally lost control. While I admit that I have been hit by a belt by my father - it was ONCE.

It is so easy to password a computer and not allow a child to use it.

There was no need for excessive force in this situation. The man is not stable.

I hope they (mother and daughter) both have restraining orders against him. I hope that it is enough protection for them.
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  #3  
Old 11-03-2011, 01:57 PM
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I agree. And she has ataxic cerebral palsy...to make it even worse.
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Old 11-03-2011, 04:33 PM
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That is HORRIBLE
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  #5  
Old 11-03-2011, 05:00 PM
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sad sad sad...
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  #6  
Old 11-03-2011, 05:22 PM
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This is a sad situation. Buuuut, there is always more to the story than we see/hear in the media. This was a case of corporal punishment but IMHO, this girl could not have been too emotionally damaged by the situation since she waited 7 years to post it or report it.

She ONLY reported it AFTER her father took away her Mercedes and told her she needed to grow up and be financially self-reliant. If she was so terribly upset about this situation why did she continue to take money and support from her father after she was of legal age to not have anything to do with him?

She only had to wait for 2 years to be of legal age and yet she waited 7 ??? Doesn't make sense to me unless she was using the video for leverage or some other reason.

Had he continued to support her and let her have a fancy car and never be an self-sufficient adult, she would have just kept sitting on this video?

I do NOT condone beating your child with a belt or strap or beating them at all for that matter, but I just don't buy the whole "poor me" act this girl is putting on. I also understand that she is handicapped but she sure seems to play that hand when necessary.

The judge (father) claims the girl "warned" him she would do this if he took away her financial support.

There is definitely more to this story than a dad who beat his poor handicap daughter.

It is not as black and white as this girl wants people to believe.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/11/03/justic...-video-beating

Now media reports are stating the girl is tweeting that she is regretful for posting the video and ruining her father.

Last edited by Blackcat31; 11-03-2011 at 05:29 PM.
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  #7  
Old 11-14-2011, 02:25 AM
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I wrote a blog about this entitled "Everywhere you go - Everybody knows

http://daycare.com/nannyde/everywher...body-knows.htm
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Old 11-14-2011, 07:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
This is a sad situation. Buuuut, there is always more to the story than we see/hear in the media. This was a case of corporal punishment but IMHO, this girl could not have been too emotionally damaged by the situation since she waited 7 years to post it or report it.

She ONLY reported it AFTER her father took away her Mercedes and told her she needed to grow up and be financially self-reliant. If she was so terribly upset about this situation why did she continue to take money and support from her father after she was of legal age to not have anything to do with him?

She only had to wait for 2 years to be of legal age and yet she waited 7 ??? Doesn't make sense to me unless she was using the video for leverage or some other reason.

Had he continued to support her and let her have a fancy car and never be an self-sufficient adult, she would have just kept sitting on this video?

I do NOT condone beating your child with a belt or strap or beating them at all for that matter, but I just don't buy the whole "poor me" act this girl is putting on. I also understand that she is handicapped but she sure seems to play that hand when necessary.

The judge (father) claims the girl "warned" him she would do this if he took away her financial support.

There is definitely more to this story than a dad who beat his poor handicap daughter.

It is not as black and white as this girl wants people to believe.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/11/03/justic...-video-beating

Now media reports are stating the girl is tweeting that she is regretful for posting the video and ruining her father.
All of this. There are MANY sides to every story...
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  #9  
Old 11-14-2011, 07:58 AM
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Originally Posted by JenNJ View Post
All of this. There are MANY sides to every story...

It is black and white. Regardless of who she is, what her motives are or even if she's spoiled. To me, it's irrelevant.

The man is an animal. There is no excuse for how he behaved. It is not possible that it "was not as bad as it appeared".

this man and people like him need to be held accountable. This issue is something that needed to be brought to light and spoken about.
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  #10  
Old 11-14-2011, 08:01 AM
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Originally Posted by JenNJ View Post
All of this. There are MANY sides to every story...
The camera doesn't have a side.

http://rogercanaff.com/site/2011/11/...ower-of-light/

Because sometimes it takes a camera in the right place at the right time to truly expose what lies beneath far more facades of normalcy than most of us understand. A camera won’t flinch. It won’t turn away. It will simply record with passive silence, and in situations like this one perhaps its growing ubiquity in our lives is a positive thing.

Last edited by nannyde; 11-14-2011 at 08:09 AM.
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  #11  
Old 11-14-2011, 08:43 AM
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I'm not saying what he did was ok AT ALL. What I am saying is that there is more to the story.
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  #12  
Old 11-14-2011, 09:06 AM
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Losing control like that is never right.

Why did she wait so many years to expose this? $$$ Daddy cut off her money so she retributed by destroying his political career.
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  #13  
Old 11-14-2011, 09:10 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
This is a sad situation. Buuuut, there is always more to the story than we see/hear in the media. This was a case of corporal punishment but IMHO, this girl could not have been too emotionally damaged by the situation since she waited 7 years to post it or report it.

She ONLY reported it AFTER her father took away her Mercedes and told her she needed to grow up and be financially self-reliant. If she was so terribly upset about this situation why did she continue to take money and support from her father after she was of legal age to not have anything to do with him?

She only had to wait for 2 years to be of legal age and yet she waited 7 ??? Doesn't make sense to me unless she was using the video for leverage or some other reason.

Had he continued to support her and let her have a fancy car and never be an self-sufficient adult, she would have just kept sitting on this video?


I do NOT condone beating your child with a belt or strap or beating them at all for that matter, but I just don't buy the whole "poor me" act this girl is putting on. I also understand that she is handicapped but she sure seems to play that hand when necessary.

The judge (father) claims the girl "warned" him she would do this if he took away her financial support.

There is definitely more to this story than a dad who beat his poor handicap daughter.

It is not as black and white as this girl wants people to believe.

http://www.cnn.com/2011/11/03/justic...-video-beating

Now media reports are stating the girl is tweeting that she is regretful for posting the video and ruining her father.
Black,


You know I love ya sistah... so this is why I stayed away from this when you posted it. I know you a bit IRL so I know you are a sweetie and tenderhearted. I'm going to pretend I'm not talking to you with this response so you don't get the girlfriend discount. for this one post. Don't take it personally.. just maybe consider this:

This was taken in 2004 off a video camera. Did you have the technology in 2004 to put up a video of seven minutes? Youtube didn't even get big until 2007ish.

You think the technology she has had has made it possible for her to do that as an 18 year old? You think the technology that took the video in the first place is compatible with what she had three years ago or five years ago?

We think the internet is this awesome thing where anything goes... but you have to remember that it wasn't like this just a few short years ago and the technology to record was vastly different seven years ago.

He was SUPPORTING her as a college student. She's only 23. Was she supposed to walk away from THAT? He CONTROLS an inheritance that pays for her schooling. THAT is now at risk.

You know anything about abused kids? You know how incredibly difficult it is to come to ANY understanding of "how bad" it was and how "normal" it was when you have NOTHING in your life to compare it to? You know the SHAME that comes with the beatings.... that goes all the way into adulthood. Even WITH proof... she KNEW ... SOMEBODY would say she deserved it or it wasn't THAT bad... or he just went a ......little....... too far. So she gets a healthy dose of shame again and again...

He HAS the opportunity to share "his side". We get 848 words... 8 of them say what he did. 840 say what she did and caused.

He can make his own 7.5 minute youtube video and share his little feelings. He can do it for free.

Tap Tap Tap Tap.... we are WAITING.

Any man that can come up with "Lay down or I'll spank your F'in face" is big enough... strong enough... a man enough... to get his SIDE out. He didn't have any problem doing it seven years ago. Let's see it now.

Okay rant over... huggles to you
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  #14  
Old 11-14-2011, 09:13 AM
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Originally Posted by sharlan View Post
Losing control like that is never right.

Why did she wait so many years to expose this? $$$ Daddy cut off her money so she retributed by destroying his political career.
She's probably not the most emotionally stable individual, granted.

I'd probably have been fairly vengeful too had a been raised by a crazy freaking brute.
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Old 11-14-2011, 09:39 AM
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Losing control like that is never right.

Why did she wait so many years to expose this? $$$ Daddy cut off her money so she retributed by destroying his political career.
She was in college. He controls her inheritance she has for her college. It was inherited thru her fathers father.

He told her to put it up without seeing it. She offered to show it to him BEFORE she posted it.

No worries for him... go ahead he said

Doesn't matter anway... if she posted it in anger... or because he looked at her sideways. He did what he did.
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  #16  
Old 11-14-2011, 09:53 AM
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I did not see anything in that video I did not see in my own home growing up. It is still very common. I may not have seen the whole thing though, it kept getting locked.

(Deleted rest of comment...Irrelevant after HEARING tape.)

Edit: So the audio finally loaded. He did lose it. I wonder why this did not go to court as evidence during the divorce? Hmm.... odd story
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  #17  
Old 11-14-2011, 11:11 AM
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Originally Posted by nannyde View Post
Black,


You know I love ya sistah... so this is why I stayed away from this when you posted it. I know you a bit IRL so I know you are a sweetie and tenderhearted. I'm going to pretend I'm not talking to you with this response so you don't get the girlfriend discount. for this one post. Don't take it personally.. just maybe consider this:

This was taken in 2004 off a video camera. Did you have the technology in 2004 to put up a video of seven minutes? Youtube didn't even get big until 2007ish.

You think the technology she has had has made it possible for her to do that as an 18 year old? You think the technology that took the video in the first place is compatible with what she had three years ago or five years ago?

We think the internet is this awesome thing where anything goes... but you have to remember that it wasn't like this just a few short years ago and the technology to record was vastly different seven years ago.

He was SUPPORTING her as a college student. She's only 23. Was she supposed to walk away from THAT? He CONTROLS an inheritance that pays for her schooling. THAT is now at risk.

You know anything about abused kids? You know how incredibly difficult it is to come to ANY understanding of "how bad" it was and how "normal" it was when you have NOTHING in your life to compare it to? You know the SHAME that comes with the beatings.... that goes all the way into adulthood. Even WITH proof... she KNEW ... SOMEBODY would say she deserved it or it wasn't THAT bad... or he just went a ......little....... too far. So she gets a healthy dose of shame again and again...

He HAS the opportunity to share "his side". We get 848 words... 8 of them say what he did. 840 say what she did and caused.

He can make his own 7.5 minute youtube video and share his little feelings. He can do it for free.

Tap Tap Tap Tap.... we are WAITING.

Any man that can come up with "Lay down or I'll spank your F'in face" is big enough... strong enough... a man enough... to get his SIDE out. He didn't have any problem doing it seven years ago. Let's see it now.

Okay rant over... huggles to you
Oh, I hear ya! Don't get me wrong, I am IN NO WAY condoning what this man did to his daughter. I think he deserves to be punished and am saddened by the fact that there will be no charges filed against him for this.

I am only stating that I think like any media story, that there is more to the story. There are more details that we, as the public, are not privy to. I am not saying anything he did (or she did) is how it should have been done, only that we do not know the WHOLE story.

There were so many other ways this whole thing could have and should have been dealt with.

Yes, viral uploading to youtube and other media outlets were not as prevalent then as they are now, but this girl had the knowledge and ability to set up a video camera with the intent to "catch" her father in the act. That action tells me that she was smart! Smart enough to do it, smart enough to catch it all on tape and smart enough to sit on it long enough to make sure it was used as a bargaining chip in what she wanted.

Why would she not show her mother?, her guidance counselor? her pastor?, her teachers at school? a friend? Why did she not show it to anyone who could have intervened and made sure she would not lose her financial support (that was entitled to her)?

Why sit on it for so long and then only release it when she was financially "cut off"?

It simply feels to me that she was using it to blackmail the father and IF (and I say IF) that was her motive, then she is just as wrong as he is.

Yes, I have worked with emotionally AND physically abused children. They will do whatever it takes to protect themselves without the rational thinking of "normal" person. I am only saying that with what little info we, as the public, are being told that if she is rational enough to know and understand blackmail, then she is not 100% the victim she is portraying herself to be.

I honestly am not following the story and basically just feel that it was a sad situation in the first place but the point I was making was just that there are always three sides to every story

His side
Her side

and the truth.

and FWIW~ Yes, you make some valid points and I do agree. I am just a natural born skeptic....

But I do still love ya!!
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  #18  
Old 11-14-2011, 11:17 AM
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I did not see anything in that video I did not see in my own home growing up. It is still very common. I may not have seen the whole thing though, it kept getting locked.

(Deleted rest of comment...Irrelevant after HEARING tape.)

Edit: So the audio finally loaded. He did lose it. I wonder why this did not go to court as evidence during the divorce? Hmm.... odd story
The parents were divorced before she disclosed the video. The Mom has known about it since April but didn't see it until the week before she posted it.

There is a custody issue with the ten year old. The Mom now has a temp restraining order on him until the last week of November.
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Old 11-14-2011, 11:35 AM
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The parents were divorced before she disclosed the video. The Mom has known about it since April but didn't see it until the week before she posted it.

There is a custody issue with the ten year old. The Mom now has a temp restraining order on him until the last week of November.
Funny though the mom is in the video also so even though she didn't "see" it she definetly knew what happened.
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Old 11-14-2011, 12:10 PM
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Funny though the mom is in the video also so even though she didn't "see" it she definetly knew what happened.
Oh sure. She just didn't see a video of it until then. She didn't even know the girl had it until April of this year.

The Mom is also doing the press with the daughter and ADMITTING what she did and apologizing for it. She's trying to make it right.
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Old 11-14-2011, 12:42 PM
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Yes, but if the Judge goes down so should the mom. Just because you say your sorry doesn't mean the law about abuse shouldn't stand up. I find it funny that they girl is alright with the mom but not the dad? I think she knows dad has alot more to lose than mom so why not! Picking favorites isn't a smart thing to do in a case like this.
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Old 11-14-2011, 12:43 PM
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He doesn't need to apologize to the public. Neither does the mother. I assume that since the daughter is so distraught over how this played out in the public eye, that her father and her were on good terms after this incident.

In my opinion, this is a spoiled, entitled young woman looking to get revenge on her father because he was going to cut her off. She got the revenge she wanted and now she is asking the public to stop judging him. She got her 15 minutes of fame. Now she sees how it has impacted HER lifestyle (she can't possibly get a new car from Daddy if he doesn't have a high paying job).

I think what he did was horrible. But as someone mentioned above, this is not a victim crying out for help. If she wanted help, she could have taken it to the police, a school counselor, her religious leader, a mentor, a women's shelter, family member, teacher at school, etc. She could have EASILY released this to the media when she taped it. All she needed was an envelope and some stamps. But she didn't. She sat on this. She waited. She had a plan from day 1. It makes me wonder if she didn't bait him into this by intentionally acting out for a long period of time. By taping constantly and hoping that one day he would lose it and hit her and she would have her blackmail evidence.

Like BlackCat said -- there are always three sides...
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Old 11-14-2011, 12:44 PM
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Also, I think it is odd that in regard to the defense about not having the media outlets in 2004 as we do now....that the beating occurred when her father was punishing her for using the internet "to acquire music and games that were unavailable for legal purchase at the time," illegally downloading and sharing musical files with others.....Which to me says she knew plenty about what to do with this (video) type of evidence.

Also, in a CNN report it says that: "if she felt she was raised by a tyrannical father, a claim shared with no one until five years after adulthood, why she insisted on living with her father and not her mother from the time of her parent's divorce, until she moved out on her own. Hillary Adams has been living on her own for some time, and has been an adult for almost six years, so why post the video in late 2011?"

As for her financial support; Asked on "AC360" to respond, Hillary Adams said, her father, while assisting, was not her primary source of financial support.


If the mother is admitting to what she did and apologizing for it, why is that enough? Why is she not being held just as accountible as he is. Granted he was the one who did 95% of the punishing, but she still participated and said NOTHING until the daughter did. Why did she not apologize sooner? Why apologize only AFTER the video was released?

So back to what I originally stated.....there is A LOT more to this story.
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Old 11-14-2011, 01:17 PM
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Yes, but if the Judge goes down so should the mom. Just because you say your sorry doesn't mean the law about abuse shouldn't stand up. I find it funny that they girl is alright with the mom but not the dad? I think she knows dad has alot more to lose than mom so why not! Picking favorites isn't a smart thing to do in a case like this.
The Mom is accountable for what she did. She doesn't say otherwise. She's working on her relationship with her kid. She's going on with her publicly and admitting her part. She's taking a beating in the press.
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Old 11-14-2011, 01:41 PM
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Also, I think it is odd that in regard to the defense about not having the media outlets in 2004 as we do now....that the beating occurred when her father was punishing her for using the internet "to acquire music and games that were unavailable for legal purchase at the time," illegally downloading and sharing musical files with others.....Which to me says she knew plenty about what to do with this (video) type of evidence.

Also, in a CNN report it says that: "if she felt she was raised by a tyrannical father, a claim shared with no one until five years after adulthood, why she insisted on living with her father and not her mother from the time of her parent's divorce, until she moved out on her own. Hillary Adams has been living on her own for some time, and has been an adult for almost six years, so why post the video in late 2011?"

As for her financial support; Asked on "AC360" to respond, Hillary Adams said, her father, while assisting, was not her primary source of financial support.


If the mother is admitting to what she did and apologizing for it, why is that enough? Why is she not being held just as accountible as he is. Granted he was the one who did 95% of the punishing, but she still participated and said NOTHING until the daughter did. Why did she not apologize sooner? Why apologize only AFTER the video was released?

So back to what I originally stated.....there is A LOT more to this story.
She did apologize sooner. She did make amends sooner. She did take her responsiblility. She made amends to the point where her daughter accepted it.

What difference does it make where the child lived after the divorce? If you have your life invested in a school... friends... work... and the mother moves away from that... it's hard to give up. Specially when Daddy controls your college fund.

He's praying everyone starts asking motivation questions because that's how the light shines away from him. He speaks to the public ONCE in a written statement and took ZERO accountability. The Mom.. sat side by side with her on every interview and took the hit. They are TRYING to get help. They are willing to do what it takes. That's HOPE. That's a world away from... "well why don't you ask Hillary why she lived with ME after the divorce if I was so bad?"

Can you tell me a single website where you could upload video from a video camera in 2004... 05... 06? If they existed I don't know about them. I don't even think the networks were doing video that far back. I don't think netflix did on demand video at that time.

Maybe Michael knows that. I think youtube started in 06 IIRC

Aquiring video and games in 2004 is a HELLUVA lot different than being able to upload your own stuff from your own video cameras.
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Old 11-14-2011, 01:48 PM
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I do believe something like that excisted but can't pinpoint it right now. What did she upload this onto a phone, video camera, the computer? The reason I think that something like that excisted is why would she do all this then. I mean if there wasn't a way to put it the computer back then why do all the video taping? That wouldn't make sense to me to do all that and then have no way to show it.
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Old 11-14-2011, 01:53 PM
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My husband bought me a video camera for Christmas in 2005. I used to upload videos on that thing all the time. And I was WAY behind the times technologically...
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  #28  
Old 11-14-2011, 02:37 PM
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She did apologize sooner. She did make amends sooner. She did take her responsiblility. She made amends to the point where her daughter accepted it.

IMPO, she accepted her father too UNTIL he fincially cut her off. I also think (and this is only my opinion) that mom decided to side WITH the daughter now out of or fear of legal action being filed against her as well.

I also think if they do charge the father, they need to charge the mother with failure to protect her child or with failure to get her child the help that was needed. THAT is her responsibility as a mother. You don't leave your child to live with the absuive father that you divorced....just doesn't make sense.


What difference does it make where the child lived after the divorce? If you have your life invested in a school... friends... work... and the mother moves away from that... it's hard to give up. Specially when Daddy controls your college fund.

But that's the thing, I don't think he was the single (or biggest) contributor to her college fund. I think he was assisting her but not her primary source. And even if he was, why would you continue to live with someone who abused you? She didn't have to. She could have lived with mom and petitioned the court to make sure that she continued receiving financial support for her needs.

He's praying everyone starts asking motivation questions because that's how the light shines away from him. He speaks to the public ONCE in a written statement and took ZERO accountability. The Mom.. sat side by side with her on every interview and took the hit. They are TRYING to get help. They are willing to do what it takes. That's HOPE. That's a world away from... "well why don't you ask Hillary why she lived with ME after the divorce if I was so bad?"

Then why is the daughter now tweeting that she regrets uploading the video? Why is now sorry that she did what SHE did? If her motivation was to get her father help, why would she be sorry? I think she is sorry because he called her bluff.

Can you tell me a single website where you could upload video from a video camera in 2004... 05... 06? If they existed I don't know about them. I don't even think the networks were doing video that far back. I don't think netflix did on demand video at that time.

Youtube began accepting videos in February 2005. Also, in order to have the know how to download video games and music illegally, she would have to have been pretty saavy with the technical gadgets. I absolutely do not buy that she didn't know how to handle the tech part of this. Plus, as a PP'er said, there are dozens of other options that she could have taken to let someone know about this abuse.

Maybe Michael knows that. I think youtube started in 06 IIRC

Aquiring video and games in 2004 is a HELLUVA lot different than being able to upload your own stuff from your own video cameras.

Actually downloading video games and music IS a lot more complicated than we think. It is alot easier now than it was back then. There are so many programs out there now that most my preschool dck's can figure out how to access on-line files/downloads. Back in '04 my brother was the only person I knew who could "get" music and video games online (without purchasing them) and he worked for Hewlitt Packard and is a computer forensic specialist.

I answered some in bold above.

I can't remember where I heard this but someone brought up the fact that as an abused child, one would think that you comply with the requests of an abuser not continue to say things to make him angrier.

DISCLAIMER: This is all off the "girlfriend" grid too....NOTHING personal because I really do see your point. However, today has been a loooooong day and rather than take my frustrations out on anyone human, I am acting out in an argumentative manner instead.
Unfortunatley, I have the sometimes annoying habit of continuing to argue for one side of the story...even when I do not agree wholeheartedly.
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  #29  
Old 11-14-2011, 08:22 PM
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What occurred on this video was abuse-there is no question in my mind about that.

With that being said, I still have to side with BlackCat and JenNJ on this. This girl had planned all along to use this video as leverage. This was blackmail at its finest.

I am not trying to make the dad the victim here, just trying to point out that this girl is sneaky deaky.
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Old 11-14-2011, 09:24 PM
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This is an abusive home and a manipulative and controlling man in my opinion.
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Old 11-15-2011, 04:10 AM
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http://thenextweb.com/shareables/201...nternet-video/


This thing called the internet
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  #32  
Old 11-15-2011, 08:21 AM
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Originally Posted by squareone View Post
What occurred on this video was abuse-there is no question in my mind about that.

With that being said, I still have to side with BlackCat and JenNJ on this. This girl had planned all along to use this video as leverage. This was blackmail at its finest.

I am not trying to make the dad the victim here, just trying to point out that this girl is sneaky deaky.
I agree with all three of you on this.

There seems to be a cycle at work here - the girl was raised by the father, after all. Hopefully they can all get the help they need to break the cycle of abuse and dishonesty in this family so that it does not continue into the next generation.
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Old 11-15-2011, 08:40 AM
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I am doing this unregistered as I am a regular on the board.

I am the mother of an adult sociopathic son. I have spent 30 years trying to love someone who doesn't feel anything at all.

This whole story has me frustrated. The father is an abusive SOB who deserves no respect at all from anyone.

That said...the daughter disturbs me even more. I see signs in her of sociopathic behavior. She comes across as manipulative and cold. Her emotion seems forced. That's because sociopaths don't have true emotions like we do...they mimic. They can come across as charismatic and intelligent. My husband and I have watched the news reports and we have just looked at each other and nodded because we see our son when we see her.

This girl recorded her father abusing her (nobody can argue that he did, in fact abuse her) But she did not record it to protect herself from abuse. She did not record it to show to authorities and STOP the abuse. She recorded it, so she could use it as blackmail at a later date. This is a sociopath at their finest.

Our son has stolen and cheated and manipulated his way through life. Some people think he is the most wonderful young man on the planet...because he wants them to see that. Others lives have been destroyed by him and he couldn't care less. Doctors have told us to stay as far away from him as possible. To have a sociopath in your life is living hell.

I have no doubts that if the money had kept coming, the video would have stayed hidden.

The father is scum. But his daughter is dangerous.
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Old 11-15-2011, 10:25 AM
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Quote:
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I am doing this unregistered as I am a regular on the board.

I am the mother of an adult sociopathic son. I have spent 30 years trying to love someone who doesn't feel anything at all.

This whole story has me frustrated. The father is an abusive SOB who deserves no respect at all from anyone.

That said...the daughter disturbs me even more. I see signs in her of sociopathic behavior. She comes across as manipulative and cold. Her emotion seems forced. That's because sociopaths don't have true emotions like we do...they mimic. They can come across as charismatic and intelligent. My husband and I have watched the news reports and we have just looked at each other and nodded because we see our son when we see her.

This girl recorded her father abusing her (nobody can argue that he did, in fact abuse her) But she did not record it to protect herself from abuse. She did not record it to show to authorities and STOP the abuse. She recorded it, so she could use it as blackmail at a later date. This is a sociopath at their finest.

Our son has stolen and cheated and manipulated his way through life. Some people think he is the most wonderful young man on the planet...because he wants them to see that. Others lives have been destroyed by him and he couldn't care less. Doctors have told us to stay as far away from him as possible. To have a sociopath in your life is living hell.

I have no doubts that if the money had kept coming, the video would have stayed hidden.

The father is scum. But his daughter is dangerous.
I have personal experience with sociopaths as well. You just may be right. They do make other peoples lives a living hell.
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Old 11-15-2011, 11:43 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
I am doing this unregistered as I am a regular on the board.

I am the mother of an adult sociopathic son. I have spent 30 years trying to love someone who doesn't feel anything at all.

This whole story has me frustrated. The father is an abusive SOB who deserves no respect at all from anyone.

That said...the daughter disturbs me even more. I see signs in her of sociopathic behavior. She comes across as manipulative and cold. Her emotion seems forced. That's because sociopaths don't have true emotions like we do...they mimic. They can come across as charismatic and intelligent. My husband and I have watched the news reports and we have just looked at each other and nodded because we see our son when we see her.

This girl recorded her father abusing her (nobody can argue that he did, in fact abuse her) But she did not record it to protect herself from abuse. She did not record it to show to authorities and STOP the abuse. She recorded it, so she could use it as blackmail at a later date. This is a sociopath at their finest.

Our son has stolen and cheated and manipulated his way through life. Some people think he is the most wonderful young man on the planet...because he wants them to see that. Others lives have been destroyed by him and he couldn't care less. Doctors have told us to stay as far away from him as possible. To have a sociopath in your life is living hell.

I have no doubts that if the money had kept coming, the video would have stayed hidden.

The father is scum. But his daughter is dangerous.
(((hugs))) to you. I can feel your pain and sympathize with you immensely.

The bolded part above is what I had trouble digesting. It just didn't sit right. You put into words what I was beating around the bush about.
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Old 11-15-2011, 12:09 PM
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This girl recorded her father abusing her (nobody can argue that he did, in fact abuse her) But she did not record it to protect herself from abuse. She did not record it to show to authorities and STOP the abuse. She recorded it, so she could use it as blackmail at a later date. This is a sociopath at their finest.

Or: she recorded it because she feared one day she would be beaten to death and wanted proof of what he was capable of doing.

She wanted PROOF. Even WITH proof... one hundred percent proof... it's not enough now. You think that it would have been enough then?

It's always the same. Someone gets raped and the first question is "what were you wearing?"

Why she recorded it... when she released it... why she released it....

None of that speaks to that seven minutes of an UNDENIABLE savage beating.

I'm waiting for the day when our society can say "he beat her"... with no "buts" afterwards.

He deserves what he gets.
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Old 11-15-2011, 01:14 PM
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Originally Posted by nannyde View Post
This girl recorded her father abusing her (nobody can argue that he did, in fact abuse her) But she did not record it to protect herself from abuse. She did not record it to show to authorities and STOP the abuse. She recorded it, so she could use it as blackmail at a later date. This is a sociopath at their finest.

Or: she recorded it because she feared one day she would be beaten to death and wanted proof of what he was capable of doing.

She wanted PROOF. Even WITH proof... one hundred percent proof... it's not enough now. You think that it would have been enough then?

It's always the same. Someone gets raped and the first question is "what were you wearing?"

Why she recorded it... when she released it... why she released it....

None of that speaks to that seven minutes of an UNDENIABLE savage beating.

I'm waiting for the day when our society can say "he beat her"... with no "buts" afterwards.

He deserves what he gets.
I agree the father is scum. He's an abuser.

BUT (yes, there it is!) the daughter is not what she appears to be.

She IS the victim of physical abuse. Nobody can deny that.

But she has chosen to manipulate and steer the situation to her advantage which is not the actions of a victim. She is in charge. I can't help but get the feeling from watching her that she in enjoying every second of the attention. I have spent 30 years watching the exact same facial expressions on my own son.

Sociopaths thrive on attention. They LOVE to be a victim and have people fawn over them. My son would tell people stories about how his friend died in his arms. He would cry and be completely believable. I would get so angry as innocent, well-meaning people would tell me what a terrible time my son had etc.etc. I used to change the subject because telling them it was all a pack of lies would have opened a whole can of worms.

My husband never laid a hand on our son, but I know for a fact that was what my son WANTED on more than one occasion. And I'll be honest and say that there are times it was all I could do not to fly at him with my fists pumping in rage. He wanted something to hold over us. He wanted to be in charge. We had to try hard not to give it to him.

Sociopaths will deliberately put themselves in dangerous situations because it's one way to "feel". Bad situations are just as exciting as good ones and if they can use the situation to forward themselves, then so be it.

The judge is destroyed. AND SO HE SHOULD BE. But the daughter is one to watch very carefully.

Sociopaths cannot be helped. Therapy does more harm than good. Several therapists told us they could do nothing for our son and that we needed to distance ourselves from him for our own sanity. Do you have any idea how hard that is for a mother to hear? He is my first born.

All therapy does is teach them more about human vunerability (sp) and how to manipulate it further.

Of course I am only seeing what the media lets me see on TV. But when I see her and her body language and her facial expressions....I see my own son staring back at me and quite frankly, she creeps me out.
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