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Old 10-28-2016, 02:17 PM
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Default How to Stop Disruptive Behavior

Hello all, I've been working at a Montessori daycare/preschool for about a month now. It's a different age for me, since I used to work with 1-3 year olds, and I'm having some trouble trying to handle disruptive behavior.

Most afternoons there's 3-4 kids. Two girls who are in kindergarten, and one boy who is 4. He is a really great kid, but he can be completely disruptive too. If the girls are playing a peaceful game, he'll come in and try to incorporate more aggressive games (not violent, just not games like house). We're trying to get the girls to incorporate him more, but sometimes I get burnt out so quickly from having to monitor him to make sure he doesn't become disruptive and try to knock their games down for example. Sometimes distracting works well, other times it doesn't.

Another issue that's my problem. I worry way too much than what I think is healthy and good for the children's development sometimes. For example, I worry that a child is going to get hurt while playing tag. Usually I let it happen and just monitor closely even though tow boys can get more aggressive with their tags. Or I worry that a kid is going to walk into a swing. Basically I'm still in that stage where I don't want the director to think I'm putting the children in danger, so I am very aware of the possible dangers around (even if it is only a swing). Does anyone have any advice to reassure me?

Thanks all!
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Old 10-28-2016, 02:36 PM
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Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
Hello all, I've been working at a Montessori daycare/preschool for about a month now. It's a different age for me, since I used to work with 1-3 year olds, and I'm having some trouble trying to handle disruptive behavior.

Most afternoons there's 3-4 kids. Two girls who are in kindergarten, and one boy who is 4. He is a really great kid, but he can be completely disruptive too. If the girls are playing a peaceful game, he'll come in and try to incorporate more aggressive games (not violent, just not games like house). We're trying to get the girls to incorporate him more, but sometimes I get burnt out so quickly from having to monitor him to make sure he doesn't become disruptive and try to knock their games down for example. Sometimes distracting works well, other times it doesn't.

Another issue that's my problem. I worry way too much than what I think is healthy and good for the children's development sometimes. For example, I worry that a child is going to get hurt while playing tag. Usually I let it happen and just monitor closely even though tow boys can get more aggressive with their tags. Or I worry that a kid is going to walk into a swing. Basically I'm still in that stage where I don't want the director to think I'm putting the children in danger, so I am very aware of the possible dangers around (even if it is only a swing). Does anyone have any advice to reassure me?

Thanks all!
Have you implemented "gluing and redirecting" methods?
How does he respond to that?
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Old 10-28-2016, 08:49 PM
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"For example, I worry that a child is going to get hurt while playing tag. Usually I let it happen and just monitor closely even though tow boys can get more aggressive with their tags. Or I worry that a kid is going to walk into a swing. Basically I'm still in that stage where I don't want the director to think I'm putting the children in danger, so I am very aware of the possible dangers around (even if it is only a swing). Does anyone have any advice to reassure me?"

Lol i understand how you feel, i was like that for almost my first year here. To be honest, there are times when you are doing your job and watching the kids and then a kid falls and hurt them self. The "bang-bang plays" are the only where we shouldn't really stress our self because we were doing our job and it happens that little Tony fell down or Tony accidentally run into Toby resulting in the kid getting a small boo boo. Kindergartens don't have the fineness motor skills lol, our Kinders are like drunken people ^_^ they take a walk and fall down, sometimes they can't even run without falling and then you try to pass the ball to them and the ball hits them in the face. My favorite memories was when we had a race and all the kindergartens all fell down one by one We all had a good laugh but mostly me

Don't stress yourself by putting pressure on yourself that may not even be there. I used to put pressures on myself because i felt that my boss was gonna think i was a bad staff but believe it or not, bosses were once in your shoes and they understand that things happen. Also its bad when we over think our self and that when we can sometimes become over protective. Like Kids are gonna be kids they are gonna fall and get hurt regardless even if you are the best teacher in the whole world! My old boss told me and thank pizza she did but i was like freaking out.. I was like a chicken running around without its head

I don't know you, but i have a feeling in my stomach that says that you have the best interest for the kids and that alot of the stress comes from you not wanting to see the kids get injure. Or maybe the feeling in my stomach was from the pizza I ate?
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Old 10-28-2016, 08:51 PM
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He does well generally when redirected but only temporarily. I've found that a lot of it stems from boredom sometimes or unwillingness to find a work to entertain himself. Usually when this happens I tell him that he can choose something to work with, or I will choose for him. The problem is I have other children to work and watch as well. I can't be focusing 100 percent of my energy on constantly redirecting him when its an issue. I guess I'm just struggling on trying to give him the attention he needs without it detracting from other day care kids experiences. I've never tried the gluing method, but I know the director generally does't like us hovering over the children too much.
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Old 10-28-2016, 08:52 PM
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Have you implemented "gluing and redirecting" methods?
How does he respond to that?
He does well generally when redirected but only temporarily. I've found that a lot of it stems from boredom sometimes or unwillingness to find a work to entertain himself. Usually when this happens I tell him that he can choose something to work with, or I will choose for him. The problem is I have other children to work and watch as well. I can't be focusing 100 percent of my energy on constantly redirecting him when its an issue. I guess I'm just struggling on trying to give him the attention he needs without it detracting from other day care kids experiences. I've never tried the gluing method, but I know the director generally does't like us hovering over the children too much.
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Old 10-28-2016, 09:01 PM
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Have you try letting him pick one activities? when kids get the chance to give their input they tend to behavior more and specifically they are the kids that get bored and cause trouble. If possible try doing things that all of the kids like, which is really hard but its really gets them busy so that you don't have to stress yourself as much.
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Old 10-28-2016, 09:25 PM
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Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
Hello all, I've been working at a Montessori daycare/preschool for about a month now. It's a different age for me, since I used to work with 1-3 year olds, and I'm having some trouble trying to handle disruptive behavior.

Most afternoons there's 3-4 kids. Two girls who are in kindergarten, and one boy who is 4. He is a really great kid, but he can be completely disruptive too. If the girls are playing a peaceful game, he'll come in and try to incorporate more aggressive games (not violent, just not games like house). We're trying to get the girls to incorporate him more, but sometimes I get burnt out so quickly from having to monitor him to make sure he doesn't become disruptive and try to knock their games down for example. Sometimes distracting works well, other times it doesn't.

Another issue that's my problem. I worry way too much than what I think is healthy and good for the children's development sometimes. For example, I worry that a child is going to get hurt while playing tag. Usually I let it happen and just monitor closely even though tow boys can get more aggressive with their tags. Or I worry that a kid is going to walk into a swing. Basically I'm still in that stage where I don't want the director to think I'm putting the children in danger, so I am very aware of the possible dangers around (even if it is only a swing). Does anyone have any advice to reassure me?

Thanks all!
I may be the odd person out but I don't worry too much about the kids getting bruises or scrapes. In my mind, a kid without bruises or scrapes is a kid who isn't moving enough or taking enough *risks*. I worry about things like broken bones and other major injuries, and the activities that are likely to cause them. It's very unlikely that a game of tag would result in a major injury.

I would also let him disrupt the girls a bit (but not all day, every day) and see if they can *handle* him. I would only step in if it's likely to be headed towards violence. Part of socialization is learning to cope with unpleasant people (without an adults help). You can also coach the girls on how to deal with him (what words to use). I would absolutely not try to get the girls to include him if they really don't want to. Give them the freedom to not have to play with him.
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Old 10-28-2016, 11:21 PM
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I may be the odd person out but I don't worry too much about the kids getting bruises or scrapes. In my mind, a kid without bruises or scrapes is a kid who isn't moving enough or taking enough *risks*. I worry about things like broken bones and other major injuries, and the activities that are likely to cause them. It's very unlikely that a game of tag would result in a major injury.

I would also let him disrupt the girls a bit (but not all day, every day) and see if they can *handle* him. I would only step in if it's likely to be headed towards violence. Part of socialization is learning to cope with unpleasant people (without an adults help). You can also coach the girls on how to deal with him (what words to use). I would absolutely not try to get the girls to include him if they really don't want to. Give them the freedom to not have to play with him.
Man I wish I was like that! Hopefully I get more comfortable soon, I've just never worked with the preschool age before. They're so tricky at that age because they want to play all the rough and tumble games but can't understand the immediate repercussion of playing tackle football, for example lol

I usually let him interact with the girls, until I see that they're getting a little too stressed by his refusal to listen to them. I only stop it right away if its something like disturbing their puzzle pieces or picking up players in a game they're playing. Usually I'll end it with saying something along the lines of, "I'm not sure that you and dcgs are playing the same game. Maybe ask them what they're doing so you can play also." Usually at that point he goes away because he doesn't have an interest playing their games. I totally agree that it's part of their socialization, but the differences in age can also be a slight problem as the ages range from 3-6.
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Old 10-28-2016, 11:25 PM
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Have you try letting him pick one activities? when kids get the chance to give their input they tend to behavior more and specifically they are the kids that get bored and cause trouble. If possible try doing things that all of the kids like, which is really hard but its really gets them busy so that you don't have to stress yourself as much.
Usually I give him the option. For example, some days after outdoors time he tells me he's just going to wait for him mom after he's done running outside. When I express doubt, he promises that he wont be "boring" lol. I'm pretty confident he means bored. If he starts being disruptive I'll tell him that he's acting like he's bored and if he continuous to show me that he's bored, I'm going to find and choose an activity for him. Sometimes this works for the remainder of the afternoon, but sometimes I had to keep reminding him of this several times. I feel like I'm being too needling, since Montessori is somewhat of a hands off approach of lets the kids entertain themselves, but when he's damaging other children's experiences I can't ignore it.
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