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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Is This Enough To Protect Me?
KristinsHomeCC 03:44 PM 07-31-2015
Me again. So this DCM is now sending me threats that I must remove all the pictures off my daycare FB and my phone by 7 pm. Not sure what my consequence will be...jeesh. anyways, I have it on my phone and now screenshot that I asked her if I could use pictures including DCB (not JUST him, him and other children) on my facebook and she said "Thats fine with me" with a thumbs up emoji. Im not sure if I could get in trouble for not "listening" or not, but I do have it in writing she gave me permission?? Thoughts? I really dont want to. They are awesome pictures of stuff we do in my program! !
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Mandy 03:52 PM 07-31-2015
If you have her permission in a text then yes that is enough to protect you. At least to me anyway. I have been reading your posts about the trouble this mother is giving you. I am not sure if you termed her yet today or not, but if you have, know that she said this to try to get you to let your guard down and take her back. Do not give in to her. If she threatens you in any way, save the conversations but do not engage her. Good luck sent your way
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Jujube835 03:58 PM 07-31-2015
Honestly, I would keep the pictures up. She's already so mad that she's reporting you anyways. No reason to bow down now. She gave permission, it's even "in writing" if you want to look at it that way.
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Mariahsaint 04:00 PM 07-31-2015
I can only reiterate what Mandy said. She gave you written permission to use those photos.

Granted, if she messages you again saying she changed her mind, then you will have to take them as well.
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midaycare 04:01 PM 07-31-2015
I would not engage her at all anymore. And I would blur dcb's face but keep the pics up.
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KristinsHomeCC 04:04 PM 07-31-2015
Originally Posted by Mandy:
If you have her permission in a text then yes that is enough to protect you. At least to me anyway. I have been reading your posts about the trouble this mother is giving you. I am not sure if you termed her yet today or not, but if you have, know that she said this to try to get you to let your guard down and take her back. Do not give in to her. If she threatens you in any way, save the conversations but do not engage her. Good luck sent your way
I have termed her this afternoon, didnt go smoothly at all. A slammed door, and rude text messages since then was the result. I will not engage at all, she is just being ridiculous. She posted a picture of herself crying on FB, which to me screams her maturity.
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Mandy 04:13 PM 07-31-2015
Originally Posted by KristinsHomeCC:
I have termed her this afternoon, didnt go smoothly at all. A slammed door, and rude text messages since then was the result. I will not engage at all, she is just being ridiculous. She posted a picture of herself crying on FB, which to me screams her maturity.
Just be careful and yes I agree with you on the fact she posted a picture like that on her FB. Also, if you need to, have your husband or someone you trust watch your phone so you can do something fun
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e.j. 06:59 PM 07-31-2015
Her behavior is ridiculous and immature but personally, I'd honor her request and take down any pictures of her child on my FB account regardless of any legal right to leave them up. (Not sure what the legalities are in this case.) I just might not get around to it before 7 pm, though!

In all seriousness....as a parent, I'd be very upset if I asked someone to remove my child's picture from a web site and they refused. I would treat her the way I would want to be treated and I would remove it - whether she deserves that consideration or not. Besides, not honoring her request will probably just invite more harassment from this woman. It wouldn't be worth it to me.
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Leigh 09:26 PM 07-31-2015
I would not take the pictures down. I'd go in and edit every one. I'd be tempted to edit with a balloon over the child's face that says "my mommy's crazy", but I wouldn't suggest that. I'd just blur the child's face or put a black dot over the kids face. I am one to go a little "Jr. High" in situations like this, though, so I'd BARELY cover the kid's face-just enough to say that I did it, but not enough to satisfy the mom. Like I said, I'm a jerk right back when someone treats me like that...I can't reach the high-road!
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childcaremom 01:59 AM 08-01-2015
Originally Posted by e.j.:
Her behavior is ridiculous and immature but personally, I'd honor her request and take down any pictures of her child on my FB account regardless of any legal right to leave them up. (Not sure what the legalities are in this case.)


I agree with this.

I would take down the pictures. This dcm is upset and lashing out but I would still take the high road. It seems like this has the potential to escalate and I would be removing any opportunity for her to lash out. (photos gone, items organized and ready for pick up with a quick, short note to remind them that the items are ready, must be picked up by x day, and to please let you know when they are coming). And that would be the end of my communication with mom. I would not respond to any further texts/requests/demands.

I mentioned on the other thread about addressing this photo issue in the future in your policies. (I still remove most photos of a child who has been terminated.) I do think, though, that if a parent requests that the photos be removed, you would still need to remove them. I have no idea, though, just guessing.

I take photos of the children but I also take photos of the activities themselves (with maybe just an arm or two) of the children. That way, if someone decides to not have photos of the kids, I still have photos of what we did but can remove the child's photos if I decide to.
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MyAngels 06:37 AM 08-01-2015
Originally Posted by e.j.:
Her behavior is ridiculous and immature but personally, I'd honor her request and take down any pictures of her child on my FB account regardless of any legal right to leave them up. (Not sure what the legalities are in this case.) I just might not get around to it before 7 pm, though!

In all seriousness....as a parent, I'd be very upset if I asked someone to remove my child's picture from a web site and they refused. I would treat her the way I would want to be treated and I would remove it - whether she deserves that consideration or not. Besides, not honoring her request will probably just invite more harassment from this woman. It wouldn't be worth it to me.


I agree with this, too. Think how you would feel if the situation were reversed. I realize she is being childish and petulant, but that's no reason for you not to take the high road and be professional in this situation.

ETA: I would also think that her request for you to remove the photos would serve as a revocation of the permission given to use them in the original text message, if it came down to a judge deciding this question.
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KristinsHomeCC 08:07 AM 08-01-2015
The adult/parent in me will remove the photos or blur out his face. They are of my kid, too. None of JUST dcb. The pride/ego/child in me doesnt, because I dont want her to feel as though she demanded and I listened. Really, the pictures are all she has left to talk to me about. If i delete or edit them, she will have nothing left on me and nooo reason to text me again. So I am going to take the high road and get this over with. Jeez maneez. On a more positive note, I start the most beautiful little 16 month old girl Monday and I am so excited! I also start a 19 month old boy then, too. Moving on and loving my job again!
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Sugar Magnolia 08:16 AM 08-01-2015
Picture of herself CRYING on Facebook??? Are you kidding me???
What an incredibly ridiculous thing to do, just mind boggling.
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KristinsHomeCC 09:12 AM 08-01-2015
Originally Posted by Sugar Magnolia:
Picture of herself CRYING on Facebook??? Are you kidding me???
What an incredibly ridiculous thing to do, just mind boggling.
I kid you not! A picture of her and DCB, she has red puffy eyes with mascara and eyeliner down to her mouth saying how no matter what he keeps her strong. I rolled my eyes so hard it gave me a headache
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Blackcat31 09:30 AM 08-01-2015
Good job taking the high road.

It does suck sometimes but at least it feels good.

On the positive side removing all the pics of her child will remove all ties/evidence that she was ever a client.

Good riddance!

Glad you have some new enrolled!
Enjoy your weekend and look only onward!!!
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TomCopeland 10:43 AM 08-04-2015
Originally Posted by KristinsHomeCC:
I have termed her this afternoon, didnt go smoothly at all. A slammed door, and rude text messages since then was the result. I will not engage at all, she is just being ridiculous. She posted a picture of herself crying on FB, which to me screams her maturity.
This is a situation where a parent initially gave you permission and then took it back. In my opinion, you should honor the parent's wishes and take down any photos when they withdraw their permission. You don't want parents making complaints or bad mouthing you to other people. Maybe she would still do this if you took down the pictures, but I think the reasonable thing to do is to take down the pictures.
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littletots 11:54 AM 08-04-2015
I would take down the photos. Exact reason I don't do FB. It becomes a control issue. We (military dcp) are required to have signed photo release. Some opt to not release. It can be changed anytime (just resign with new date). Sorry, this is happening to you. We all dislike issues with dcparents. Life too short.
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KristinsHomeCC 12:45 PM 08-04-2015
Pictures have been edited to have a sticker over his face. She has since left me alone All is good now, and so far my new DCP are awesome
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