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  #1  
Old 01-07-2015, 06:40 AM
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Default DCKs with SAHPs

I've had DCKs enrolled before with stay at home parents, usually just wanting to socialize their children and get errands done. But the one I have now, just kind of confuses me??? Their 3yo comes here while they keep their 1yo home. She takes the 1yo to playgroups and such, and runs errands with that child. The 3yo is a good DCK, but does have delayed speech, their reasoning for putting DCK in daycare in hopes they'd pick up more from other children. DCK isn't aggressive, but does hit and push a lot, I think due to lack of verbal skills. I've mentioned AEA several times to them so see if there is something more they or I could do to help, but they've still never contacted them. And this DCK is always here...drop her off knowingly sick....and take forever to come pick DCK up after I refuse to just give her Tylenol and keep her.(twice admitting they knew DCK had a temp of over 102, but just thought it was cause she had too much cake that weekend? And not enough sleep another?) and today schools are canceled with a 30 below wind chill...but DCK is still here...DCD dropped off on his way to work because DCM didn't want to go out in this weather. The family is actually very nice, but I just don't get why you'd keep one child home and not the other. DCK isn't bad by any means. Anyone else have a DCF like this?
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Old 01-07-2015, 06:48 AM
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They don't seem too nice if they make their sick kid go to daycare when mom is home. I understand the wanting their kid to have socialization, but IMO kids learn proper speech from adults/parents, not from other kids. Other kids are hard to understand, have poor pronounciation...that doesn't really make sense to me.
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Old 01-07-2015, 06:56 AM
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Is it a gender thing? Does dcm favor one over the other? Could it be that she prefers babies and has no idea what to teach an older child so she leaves it in the hands of a professional (you)? I don't understand parents like this either- I never want my kids to be watched by anyone but me, but not everyone is cut out for parenting, and I guess it's better they know it, and send them to us, kwim?
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Old 01-07-2015, 07:06 AM
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I agree the sending the child in ill isn't nice.

I do wonder if they've bought the line of daycare as school and think the child is getting more instruction in your care ("school") then just being home, KWIM?
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Old 01-07-2015, 07:06 AM
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At first, it sounded to me like the family is trying to help the 3 year old develop his/her speech and social skills by being around the other children in daycare, which to me says they are being good parents.

Then when you said they refuse to get help for the child's speech problems and take the child to you when he/she's sick, it says the complete opposite. It might be that the parents are not the type of parents who should have a special needs child. They sound like they don't have the patience, ability, interest in dealing with a child who needs extra help/attention.

If that's the case, then the child is probably safer with you than being forced upon parents who can't handle their needs. As far as the speech goes, I know it's better to get them speech therapy as soon as possible, but if the parents won't contact anyone, there's nothing you can do. When the child goes to school, the school will get involved and get the child with a speech therapist.
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Old 01-07-2015, 08:07 AM
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If the child has delays and aggressive behaviors, that seems why mom doesnt want to keep them home. She can do the fun things with her normal, well behaved child that she cant do with the older in tow. She doesnt want the older around, period. No matter how nice they come across......it is a very unhealthy relationship when a SAHP brings their child to daycare open to close, when sick, and neglects obvious needs like addressing delays and poor behavior. She might be a nice person but she isn't being a good mom right now. I would insist on evaluation and a plan of action for behaviors and put this all back on mom's plate or they can find a new daycare.
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Old 01-07-2015, 08:28 AM
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I do. Working dad. Sahm. Bring 4 yr old kid here to pick up verbal skills. 3 other children at home do not attend daycare. They only come part time. Typically 2 days/week. Good kid for the most part, but speech delayed. I kinda feel honored that they feel my program would benifit their child when there are other options.
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Old 01-07-2015, 08:40 AM
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I dont care what a parent does or does not do while their child is with me.....The only thing I care about is if the child fits in my program and the parents follow all of my rules and policies.

These people do NOT respect you or your program. NO way in the world would I be ok with someone dropping their child off sick and thy knew it... I would have termed that day.

DOn't let your parents make excuses as to why a child may be sick, cake...hahah that's a funny one. YOu need to exclude for the symptoms, not the reasons. We have other children and families to care for and keep safe and we can't do that when parents lie, bring a child sick. It goes to show that they are only thinking about themselves.

Sorry, I am not one to always say TERM, but in your case I would. I would start advertising now and let that family go.
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Old 01-07-2015, 08:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by daycare View Post
I dont care what a parent does or does not do while their child is with me.....The only thing I care about is if the child fits in my program and the parents follow all of my rules and policies.

These people do NOT respect you or your program. NO way in the world would I be ok with someone dropping their child off sick and thy knew it... I would have termed that day.

DOn't let your parents make excuses as to why a child may be sick, cake...hahah that's a funny one. YOu need to exclude for the symptoms, not the reasons. We have other children and families to care for and keep safe and we can't do that when parents lie, bring a child sick. It goes to show that they are only thinking about themselves.

Sorry, I am not one to always say TERM, but in your case I would. I would start advertising now and let that family go.
I would have done that immediately after they admitted to knowingly dropping the kid off sick!

I have SAHM's kids enrolled FT. Not something I would be willing to do again most likely, it's completely unnecessary.
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Old 01-07-2015, 08:58 AM
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Originally Posted by daycarediva View Post
I would have done that immediately after they admitted to knowingly dropping the kid off sick!

I have SAHM's kids enrolled FT. Not something I would be willing to do again most likely, it's completely unnecessary.
I have several families that don't work and their kids are with me full time. Great families too.

BC said that we can't call them SAHM, because they are not staying home to be a mom....lol I thought that was funny.

But yes, I would have termed on the spot too
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Old 01-07-2015, 09:23 AM
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Quote:
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I have several families that don't work and their kids are with me full time. Great families too.

BC said that we can't call them SAHM, because they are not staying home to be a mom....lol I thought that was funny.

But yes, I would have termed on the spot too
That wasn't me.

I still call the SAHMs because they are still moms.

If not having kids present in your home determined your status as a mom, I wouldn't be allowed to use that title either as my children do not live in my home anymore but I am still a mom.

I do recall that conversation/thread on the forum though a while back....it was a good one.
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Old 01-07-2015, 09:32 AM
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Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
That wasn't me.

I still call the SAHMs because they are still moms.

If not having kids present in your home determined your status as a mom, I wouldn't be allowed to use that title either as my children do not live in my home anymore but I am still a mom.

I do recall that conversation/thread on the forum though a while back....it was a good one.
That would also make me a mom for 12 hours a day while kids are here but I'm not a mom at all lol
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Old 01-07-2015, 09:52 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post
That wasn't me.

I still call the SAHMs because they are still moms.

If not having kids present in your home determined your status as a mom, I wouldn't be allowed to use that title either as my children do not live in my home anymore but I am still a mom.

I do recall that conversation/thread on the forum though a while back....it was a good one.
lol.....sorry I thought that it was you.
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  #14  
Old 01-07-2015, 10:04 AM
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lol.....sorry I thought that it was you.
no worries...

I remember lots of things but rarely remember why.
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  #15  
Old 01-07-2015, 10:35 AM
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She probably wants one on one time with her youngest without the demands of a 3 year old. I completely get it! When I first had my second daughter it was hard to focus any attention on her because my 3 year old was sooooo demanding...and she didn't have delays! When my oldest went to half day kinder it was a Godsend. I could finally give my youngest the one on one attention that I had been able to give my eldest. She probably uses daycare for that reason.

Sending her in sick however is a whole other kettle of fish! Not cool at all
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  #16  
Old 01-07-2015, 10:46 AM
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I have had many families like this. I can't claim to understand it beyond thinking that the Mom's feel really overwhelmed with parenting more than one child.
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