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Old 09-07-2012, 06:18 AM
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MsMe MsMe is offline
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Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 712
Default LEGIT Baby Fever!

Good Morning ladies!!

This week I started a new baby!!! She is the third child from this daycare family and is as wonderfull a baby as the two before her! Because she comes from a DCF I have had for 5 years and she is so much like her brother and sister the transition has been seamless and ofcourse communication with Mom is excellent. I am LOVING every second with this perfect little one!!

....and that leads me into the reason for my post....

for the first time I have LEGIT BABY FEVER.

I have always 'wanted' children (hint:I do daycare) but for the very first time I am in a possition to ACTUALY have one of my own!!

I am 28 and getting married in December and we have talked about having children soon after. I am as 'prepared' as anyone possibly could be...but the up all night still scares me.

We would also prefer that I stay-at-home with children. I currently do daycare in a seperate house w/ my Mother. I have thought before about shutting down and as much as I want a family it would break my heart to say good-bye to my families. I know if I cont daycare I would be with my baby all day but I wouldn't get my own chores at home done and I would still be rushing out of the house in the morning and rushing home to do dinner at night. Then when my child is sick I would have to stay home, leaving my Mother in alone or bring a sick/simi sick child to daycare. That is not the Mother I always dreamed of being.

LOTS to think about.

Was it difficult for any of you to make the leap and have your first child?
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Old 09-07-2012, 08:08 AM
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Sprouts Sprouts is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: New York
Posts: 801

I say go for it, your body is telling you that you're ready...everything falls in place...maybe you can work part time when the baby arrives and while your pregnant your mom can find a reliable assistant and you can be the sub if needed....eventually you will have kids , so why not now? This is the best age !
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Old 09-07-2012, 12:14 PM
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jojosmommy jojosmommy is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: MN
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Do what your heart and your family feels is right. If your ready God will find a way. Some of your kids might leave before then or some how your hours will change or something. Don't live solely for your daycare. It will work.
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Old 09-07-2012, 02:27 PM
Willow Willow is offline
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Join Date: May 2012
Posts: 2,607

Holy buckets do I hear you lol

I have two babies that started a few weeks ago, both under three months of age. I. AM. SMITTEN. DH and I just got married end of July and have thrown trying to conceive into overdrive lately. I blame it all on the does he. They really should put a warning label on licensing paperwork......***DOING DAYCARE, ESPECIALLY FOR CUTE BABIES, CAN RESULT IN PREGNANCY*** :P

My kids are 8 and nearly 10 years old. I had zero intention of ever starting over. I liked that at this point they can get up and make their own breakfast on Saturday mornings and pick up after themselves. Seeing those babies though brought me back to how sweet and fun all the years leading up to this point have been. I'm sure it's selective memory, I'm sure a lot of it also drove me nuts, but I have those wonderful bebe blinders on and frankly, I don't care! I choose to only remember the smell and the snuggling and the sweetness

****Long rant ahead, ignore if you'd like......****

I know that I'll keep doing daycare through pregnancy (God willing) and beyond. Although DH makes enough for me to quit if I'd want to I like how contributing financially to our household makes me feel. Add to that I think it would be great fun for a little one to grow up with friends that come and play with him or her for 8-9 hours a day. My daughter and son had me all to themselves until they were both nearly in school, although they love one on one time they also look forward to their friends coming here everyday now (even if they are younger than they are they still have a blast and actually enjoy the leadership role the kids seem to put them in naturally).

When they were very young I was initially very overwhelmed, but as they got older and more independent I got incredibly bored with my only role being taking care of them and the household.

Just so you know, you have so many options beyond what you listed in your original post.

It's not keep on and feel overwhelmed and torn with a sick kiddo and a dirty house -or- quit everything and avoid all of that.

If you keep on you can always get a sub if your child gets sick, housework can be re-divvied up with your husband so when you get home you're not so overwhelmed, you could even re-locate and just do daycare out of your home so you're not having to run out the door in the morning (that's one of my favorite parts of doing daycare out of my home...goes along with not having to scrap my windows in winter or travel in inclement weather!)

On the flip side being a straight stay at home mom can become incredibly redundant, the same tasks, every day, you may grow weary...most SAHM's have far less adult interaction day to day which can be a struggle mentally, you may grow resentful if all of the housework seems to fall to you and you lose that balance partners typically share, when baby is colicky or teething or hitting those terrible twos you'll essentially have very little time away AND you'll be largely alone in dealing with the stress until hubby comes home. For some women that's heaven, for others they end up ripping all their hair out trying to live that life.

I will say this. Being a stay at home mom was HANDS DOWN *THE* HARDEST job I've ever held. I may still "stay home" now but the work licensed daycare provides gives me focus, daily challenge, a sense of achievement and a much needed sense of purpose beyond what motherhood could offer me.

Not to rain on your parade as you may be one of those women that revels in that lifestyle but it always surprises me when women assume becoming a stay at home mom will afford them a sparkling house, constantly happy child and dinner on the table with a smile on hubby's face when he walks in the door each night. That's not really realistic thinking. I had much less motivation to play Martha Stewart when I was a stay at home mom than I do now. Doing daycare during the day now I look forward to 5 o'clock and that alone time with my family. I love to put a good meal on the table, go outside and play with them, sit down with a game or good movie. Come 5'oclock before just meant my kids' father was coming home and I could get the heck away from them all. I hated having all the household responsibility to myself and there was never a difference between day and night, never a difference day to day, week to week, month to month. It was the same exact routine every single day and blurred together with no end in sight. Drove. Me. Nuts.

Being pregnant in and of itself can be a great challenge for the body, and when baby is born you will definitely lose an insane amount of sleep. Your personal hygiene will take a backseat for awhile and so will your housework. You will feel rushed, you will not want to make dinner. You will get crabby sometimes. You'll be in a constant state of hyper awareness over baby's health and well being. BUT - that will happen whether you have a job outside of motherhood or not. That's just what becoming a mother is.

The best part though is, IT DOES GET BETTER!!!!!!!! No matter what you decide things will sort themselves out, and you'll hopefully find a routine that makes you happy and gives you the happy family life you're shooting for.

Sorry for the ramblings. You just sound a lot like I did back before I took the plunge. I only wish someone would have warned me then!!!! I felt like a failure for a long time because I was unrealistic about what motherhood was supposed to be. About the woman I was supposed to be. When I finally got a grip and learned to juggle everything proficiently I still wasn't happy and didn't understand that.

You just have to keep chipping away until you find what works for YOU. That may take several revisions over the years, and that's ok. Just don't put a cap on your options, there are so many and you'll be entitled to change your mind if things don't work out as you originally anticipate they will.

Either way you go, best of luck to you!
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fever - policy, teething

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