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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Need Advice On A Potential Client
tbutler 04:39 PM 08-30-2011
I may be making a mountain out of a mole hill, but, here's the situation:

Family came by a few Saturdays ago for tour & interview that lasted about 45 minutes. They were touring a few home day cares and said they would let me know their decision that Monday. Monday the mom called and said she wanted to enroll her kid and would come by that Saturday to pay and turn in all paperwork. She never showed Saturday. She called last Tuesday and asked if she could stop by Wednesday about 4:45. Wednesday she was no call and no show. I waited on her til 5 cause my one dcg had already been picked up. Just got a text from her saying if it was ok for her to stop by tomorrow.

I've heard a lot about "red flags" on this forum. I'm wondering if this same behavior is to follow in the future re: late payments and pickups. My dh says just respond to her with "are you sure you can come by tomorrow?" lol.

Should I mention her disregard for my time, not mention anything, not enroll her kid?

Thanks for listening to me vent or reading it anyways!
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daycare 04:58 PM 08-30-2011
this is a tuff one for me too. I look at it like this. You know the old saying fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me? OR something like that...lol

I personally would not take someone who flaked that many times. Once ok I get it, but more than that NO THANKS. First impressions mean alot to me, however, we all know that when you have kids that things come up and things happen out of our control.

If you really need the money and can deal with the possible drama, I would say that when the parent comes to finally enroll that you make sure that you are very clear about your polices. Perhaps even go over them with the parents word for word. Do you have a parent handbook?

Good luck with this one....sorry I am not that much help.
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Blackcat31 05:11 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by tbutler:
I may be making a mountain out of a mole hill, but, here's the situation:

Family came by a few Saturdays ago for tour & interview that lasted about 45 minutes. They were touring a few home day cares and said they would let me know their decision that Monday. Monday the mom called and said she wanted to enroll her kid and would come by that Saturday to pay and turn in all paperwork. She never showed Saturday. She called last Tuesday and asked if she could stop by Wednesday about 4:45. Wednesday she was no call and no show. I waited on her til 5 cause my one dcg had already been picked up. Just got a text from her saying if it was ok for her to stop by tomorrow.

I've heard a lot about "red flags" on this forum. I'm wondering if this same behavior is to follow in the future re: late payments and pickups. My dh says just respond to her with "are you sure you can come by tomorrow?" lol.

Should I mention her disregard for my time, not mention anything, not enroll her kid?

Thanks for listening to me vent or reading it anyways!
My advice? Communicate with her. Ask her what the issue with no showing you is. Find out what the situation is that caused her to behave that way. I would use this opportunity to set up the environment with her so that she is aware that this is not the type of behavior that you find acceptable in clients. Use this as a chance to set up some ground rules with her. When you take the time to have this conversation you will find out more about why she no showed and will be able to make a better decision on whether she is someone you want as a daycare parent or not.

Sometimes starting off on the wrong foot isn't a bad thing....I look at it like an opening for discussion and use it to my advantage to get to know the whole story/family. Flags are't always red...some times they are simply yellow ya know?
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sharlan 05:12 PM 08-30-2011
I would really be torn on this one. It sounds like important things like payment and on-time arrivals and departures would be an issue.

I had one mother set up an appt. It had to be on a Sat so dh could come. 1 hr before they were supposed to be here, I sent her an email saying I was looking forward to our meeting. She emails back, sorry, something came up.

She rescheduled for last weekend. 5 mins AFTER she was to be here, she sends me another email, sorry, baby is ill. Can I come next week when you have kids. I replied no, no first interviews during daycare or dinner hours. First it was had to be scheduled when dh could come, now she wants to come alone and observe.

I deleted all of her emails.
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mismatchedsocks 05:27 PM 08-30-2011
I like what blackcat is saying. I think being honest, giving her a chance to explain. Tell her you understand things come up but NEED open communication for it to work. Ask her how she feels comfortable communicating.
Good luck!
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kendallina 05:31 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
My advice? Communicate with her. Ask her what the issue with no showing you is. Find out what the situation is that caused her to behave that way. I would use this opportunity to set up the environment with her so that she is aware that this is not the type of behavior that you find acceptable in clients. Use this as a chance to set up some ground rules with her. When you take the time to have this conversation you will find out more about why she no showed and will be able to make a better decision on whether she is someone you want as a daycare parent or not.

Sometimes starting off on the wrong foot isn't a bad thing....I look at it like an opening for discussion and use it to my advantage to get to know the whole story/family. Flags are't always red...some times they are simply yellow ya know?
Very well said!
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Crazy8 05:31 PM 08-30-2011
how bad do you need the child/income??? I am thinking one of two things... either she was stalling you waiting to hear back from another daycare OR she was stalling you because she didn't have the money to give you the deposit but didn't want you to give the spot away. Either way, I would be hesitant to take them on but my decision would be based on a conversation about it (not texts/emails) AND how the actual interview went, the feelings I got from mom and child then.
In 10 years and many families I have NEVER had the issue of receiving payments, etc. that so many here have mentioned - so I am probably a little more trusting than some others.
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tbutler 07:43 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by daycare:
this is a tuff one for me too. I look at it like this. You know the old saying fool me once shame on you, fool me twice shame on me? OR something like that...lol

I personally would not take someone who flaked that many times. Once ok I get it, but more than that NO THANKS. First impressions mean alot to me, however, we all know that when you have kids that things come up and things happen out of our control.

If you really need the money and can deal with the possible drama, I would say that when the parent comes to finally enroll that you make sure that you are very clear about your polices. Perhaps even go over them with the parents word for word. Do you have a parent handbook?

Good luck with this one....sorry I am not that much help.
Yes, I do have a parent handbook. I went over some of it with her during our visit. She even took a copy with her. The first impression was a great one (during our interview). But the three no calls and no shows make we not want to deal her. I'm big on communication. I even have a section for it in my handbook. Now that I'm thinking about it, she is not abiding by policies prior to enrolling her child.
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tbutler 07:47 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
My advice? Communicate with her. Ask her what the issue with no showing you is. Find out what the situation is that caused her to behave that way. I would use this opportunity to set up the environment with her so that she is aware that this is not the type of behavior that you find acceptable in clients. Use this as a chance to set up some ground rules with her. When you take the time to have this conversation you will find out more about why she no showed and will be able to make a better decision on whether she is someone you want as a daycare parent or not.

Sometimes starting off on the wrong foot isn't a bad thing....I look at it like an opening for discussion and use it to my advantage to get to know the whole story/family. Flags are't always red...some times they are simply yellow ya know?
Great advice. And you gave me a new way to look at things. But Blackcat, my intuition is telling me there's going to be more lacking of communication. I'm very new to running my own business. But, I'm considering enrolling the child for the potential learning experience. That way if this yellow flag pops up with another parent and my intuition proves to be true, I won't accept that family.
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Meeko 07:51 PM 08-30-2011
If you ask why she missed her appointments with you and her excuse is "I forgot"..then run a mile.

But maybe it's something like she's taking care of a terminally ill parent or something.

It wouldn't hurt to just ask!
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tbutler 08:08 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by sharlan:
I would really be torn on this one. It sounds like important things like payment and on-time arrivals and departures would be an issue.

I had one mother set up an appt. It had to be on a Sat so dh could come. 1 hr before they were supposed to be here, I sent her an email saying I was looking forward to our meeting. She emails back, sorry, something came up.

She rescheduled for last weekend. 5 mins AFTER she was to be here, she sends me another email, sorry, baby is ill. Can I come next week when you have kids. I replied no, no first interviews during daycare or dinner hours. First it was had to be scheduled when dh could come, now she wants to come alone and observe.

I deleted all of her emails.
I feel the same way Sharlan. My gut tells me not respond to her text. I'm TORN on what to do.
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tbutler 08:09 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by lilrugrats:
I like what blackcat is saying. I think being honest, giving her a chance to explain. Tell her you understand things come up but NEED open communication for it to work. Ask her how she feels comfortable communicating.
Good luck!
Thanks Amber. If I decide to enroll her child, this is exactly what I'll do.
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tbutler 08:16 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by LittleDiamonds:
how bad do you need the child/income??? I am thinking one of two things... either she was stalling you waiting to hear back from another daycare OR she was stalling you because she didn't have the money to give you the deposit but didn't want you to give the spot away. Either way, I would be hesitant to take them on but my decision would be based on a conversation about it (not texts/emails) AND how the actual interview went, the feelings I got from mom and child then.
In 10 years and many families I have NEVER had the issue of receiving payments, etc. that so many here have mentioned - so I am probably a little more trusting than some others.
I would love the income because it will help. But I don't want the strong possibility of stress that may come. My first thought was that she doesn't have the money hence the no shows but continuous calls to make sure all spots weren't taken. My second thought was that I don't accept child care assistance and she just got approved and off the waiting list. Why come to me to pay full tuition when she can go elsewhere and pay a percentage out of pocket. But I most definitely will be having a conversation about it before I take any money or paperwork from her.
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tbutler 08:20 PM 08-30-2011
Originally Posted by Meeko60:
If you ask why she missed her appointments with you and her excuse is "I forgot"..then run a mile.

But maybe it's something like she's taking care of a terminally ill parent or something.

It wouldn't hurt to just ask!
Lol to "I forgot"..then run. I will definitely take that advice. I do hope that she has enough sense not to say that to me even if that is what happened.
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Tags:parents - don't appreciate, potential client, red flag
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