bluemoose_mom 11:35 AM 08-24-2012
What is your guys policy on hitting and kicking YOU?
And do you believe that hitting from a nearly 4 year old is considered normal behavior?
What is your policy on hitting other children, at the same age range?
How long do you give to resolve hitting?
daycare 11:41 AM 08-24-2012
I may sound harsh, but if a child hit or kicked me they would be on the one way train outta here...No way would I deal with that.
As for the other kids, depends on the age of the child and how often it is occurring, as well as if the parents are willing to work with me on stopping the behavior.
I have a zero tolerance for violence policy, so I don't think that I would hang on to a child too long who was violent.
However, I would try my best to help the child and try to find the root of the problem. The last thing that you would want is to lose another child over a child like this.
bluemoose_mom 11:49 AM 08-24-2012
No hitting or kicking other children (yet) just me.
It's only happened 3 times in 3 months, two of those being this week.
Root of the problem: this kid has never been disciplined. Mom never does time out (cause he won't sit for her, I barely get him to sit), doesn't spank, doesn't take away privileges, just ignore's ALL wrong behavior until he redirects himself. Old daycare provider put up with way too much naughty behavior, so he didn't get much there either.
She also thinks it's normal behavior.
We're working on it, and mom says she's going to start being more consistant, and do time out...we shall see.
Most of the time, he's a good kid. Only needs time out...maybe 2 in a good week, up to 4 or 5 on a bad week. Good weeks are more common.
For the record, I have very little tolerance for this type of behavior. The only reason he is still here is that he's not hit anyone (yet), the other children aren't copying him, and mom says she's willing to work together.
I sent him home at 10 am this Wednesday after he kicked me.
I have a 10 m dcg, 17 month dcg (sister of 4 year old), part time 12 m dcb, 3 yr dd, and nearly 4 yr dcb (the hitter).
daycare 11:52 AM 08-24-2012
At 4 years old they know hitting is wrong.
For me I could not tolerate being abused by anyone child or adult.
How long has mom been trying to help u and how is she ??
bluemoose_mom 12:28 PM 08-24-2012
We talked on wednesday when she came to get sister, so we have only been working on it since then.
She says she's going to be more consistent with him, and do time outs.
I'm not sure how that is going to work, I see him really resisting, and mom caving...which is only going to make things worse.
They don't make him listen, ever. For example, he's told by dad to stay inside until dad is ready but often dcb goes outside any way. Dad just lets him, instead of making him come back inside.
Mom also insinuated that since I'm a daycare provider, I should just "deal" (expect) it. GRRR. Not going there.
daycare 12:32 PM 08-24-2012
Originally Posted by bluemoose_mom:
We talked on wednesday when she came to get sister, so we have only been working on it since then.
She says she's going to be more consistent with him, and do time outs.
I'm not sure how that is going to work, I see him really resisting, and mom caving...which is only going to make things worse.
They don't make him listen, ever. For example, he's told by dad to stay inside until dad is ready but often dcb goes outside any way. Dad just lets him, instead of making him come back inside.
Mom also insinuated that since I'm a daycare provider, I should just "deal" (expect) it. GRRR. Not going there.
if that is the mentality of the mom, I don't think that this situation is going to improve.
If thats the way the mom wants to be, the next time that child hits you, I would be calling her to pick him up and telling her, now its your problem.
In my experience, if the family is not on the same page as you now, they never will be and this whole saga will only continue. YOu need to tell the DCP that this CAN NOT continue this way. Either she and dad help put stop to it or find other care.
I know that this is not what you probably wanted to hear, but you have two options. Deal with it and be miserable about the situation or you can make the problem theirs, because it is there problem, not yours....