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jojosmommy 11:10 AM 04-16-2012
This is related to the earlier posts about technology.

I am in my 20's, grew up surrounded by technology however my family was never wealthy enough to over indulge us with too much and we never had enough $$ to by new best of the best.

I think the current obsession with technology is way over the top. I have a dck who has cried every morning at drop off since mom got an iphone because he hates having to leave it behind to come to daycare. He is 4, can't tell you how to spell his name, doesn't know all his shapes and is Not ready for k in any way. Mom does nothing but allow him to play on her iphone or computer, he has also memorized every word to both cars movies and is tv obsessed. He never plays anything that is not tv related, turns everything into some tv character. My other dcf has dvds installed in both vehicles and dcg watches on the way here (walking distance for crying out loud!!!!)

My ds just turned 3 and he has two pieces of technology. Gma got him an ixl computer which he is allowed to read on/play 15 min max per dc day and never on the weekends. The other is a leap Frog book thing which we got from the thrift store and he reads about 1x per week. Hubs and I are hesitant to allow him to indulge in any of this as I know there are way better ways to learn and play as a kid.

I do not doubt that he will get his fair share of technology once he enters kindy so I feel like pre k technology exposure is a waste of precious learning time. Am I nuts? Am I alone here? Am I acting like an 80 year old? or am I somehow trying to justify the fact that we are middle class and do not have the $$ to buy an iphone let alone allow my kids to play with it?
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Heidi 11:24 AM 04-16-2012
nope, you are not nuts and you are not acting like an 80 year old.

The fact is that our children do need to know more about technology than we ever did, but that does not mean that a child under 5 needs to be spoon-fed crap from some sort of screen every waking minute.

My own kids are pretty technology obsessed, but that's balanced with lots of outdoor play time, camping, dances (my daughter), school, a school play & choir, reading, and more. Once in a while, I have to reign in the screen-time, but it also depends on the time of year. In the winter, they tend to spend more time with electronics. In the summer, they hardly touch them.

My 14 year old spends a lot of her computer time writing on blogs and "fan fiction" sites. She has a tv in her room, but hardly watches it. My 11 yo boy, on the other hand, just wants to play Minecraft..
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:39 AM 04-16-2012
I think along the same lines that you do.

Our teenager only uses the computer for researching purposes/typing papers for school.
He uses DH's iPad when he has to wait at DH's job.
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Michael 12:03 PM 04-16-2012
My son sat on my lag at the computer when he was 2 years old and never left it. He is a 4.0 in college and just got an internship at JPL this summer. There is no getting away from the future and technology. There DOES need to be limitations and supervision. I think as long as they are using the technology for constructive purposes I'm ok with it.

I only allowed my daughter to have an iPhone at 12. She is homeschooled and it allows her to communicate with her friends. We make her aware of the threats and pitfalls of the real world and I think that makes her aware and helps in knowing that we trust her. It goes both ways.
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Country Kids 02:30 PM 04-16-2012
I actually have read some articles and different things and saw some very interesting things. Drs. are seeing earlier and earlier signs of alzhimers in people and seeing a link between it and technology.

Really looking at it I can see how its happening. If you think about it our brains really don't need to store information now. Everything but our brain holds the information. Our cell phones really hold all numbers we need so why remember them. I'm actually having more and more trouble remembering phone numbers anymore.

Also, we have computors that we can go back, back, and back some more for the information we need. Everything is at our fingertips so why have to remember/memorize anything anymore. Also, we sometimes run so much information through our brain in a single day from the computor that our brain starts to fizzle faster from all of it.
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Ariana 02:37 PM 04-16-2012
I have zero problems with technology or it's use even for kids. I DO have a problem when technology is used as a babysitter and takes the place of plain old interaction. This is the real problem.

My DH was addicted to video games as a kid and I played my fair share as well and watched a LOT of tv. I think we both turned out fairly well. It doesn't always destroy you.

Country Kids I had never heard of this. I have actually heard the opposite. Games (like iPhone games etc) actually help the brain form new neural pathways that ward off Alzheimers.
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Country Kids 02:41 PM 04-16-2012
I guess that would be true if you had those. I don't have a Iphone and really don't play any online games.

I'm thinking they are talking about brain overload with so much information being at us everyday. After awhile your brain just can't handle it anymore or your not using it to its full potential because you know you can go back and get the information in a matter of seconds.
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sharlan 02:44 PM 04-16-2012
I think it's wrong when a child can't play without using some type of computer technology. I don't have a problem with kids using it, but I think they're not learning how to think and entertain themselves.

I have a 9 yo who cannot entertain himself for 5 mins. All I hear is, I'm bored. I have 3 seperate tables set up with various craft/paint supplies. I have tons of play dough, Legos, K'Nex, cars, games, a bike for him, yet there's nothing to do. He's asked and been told no for almost 9 mos to play on my computer. He will grab my Kindle and hand it to my 4 yo to play so he can attempt to get his hands on it. Grandma tells me that he gets up at 6 so he can play on the computer before school.
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Country Kids 02:48 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by sharlan:
I think it's wrong when a child can't play without using some type of computer technology. I don't have a problem with kids using it, but I think they're not learning how to think and entertain themselves.

I have a 9 yo who cannot entertain himself for 5 mins. All I hear is, I'm bored. I have 3 seperate tables set up with various craft/paint supplies. I have tons of play dough, Legos, K'Nex, cars, games, a bike for him, yet there's nothing to do. He's asked and been told no for almost 9 mos to play on my computer. He will grab my Kindle and hand it to my 4 yo to play so he can attempt to get his hands on it. Grandma tells me that he gets up at 6 so he can play on the computer before school.
See all of that is just wrong. His mind must just never shut off and then they wonder why there are so many problems with him.
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Blackcat31 02:54 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I have zero problems with technology or it's use even for kids. I DO have a problem when technology is used as a babysitter and takes the place of plain old interaction. This is the real problem.
My DH was addicted to video games as a kid and I played my fair share as well and watched a LOT of tv. I think we both turned out fairly well. It doesn't always destroy you.

Country Kids I had never heard of this. I have actually heard the opposite. Games (like iPhone games etc) actually help the brain form new neural pathways that ward off Alzheimers.
I agree!

I also think the biggest problem is when there is too much passive learning done with electronics and not enough active learning to go along with it.

I did however hear that the brain games you mention about warding off alzheimers is a theory for adults and not for children. Apparently adult brains are very different than young brains just now creating those neural pathways. I think the brain games are meant to keep the already form pathways open, which wouldn't be much help if the pathway hasn't been formed at all yet.
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Crazy8 05:21 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Michael:
My son sat on my lag at the computer when he was 2 years old and never left it. He is a 4.0 in college and just got an internship at JPL this summer. There is no getting away from the future and technology. There DOES need to be limitations and supervision. I think as long as they are using the technology for constructive purposes I'm ok with it.
I only allowed my daughter to have an iPhone at 12. She is homeschooled and it allows her to communicate with her friends. We make her aware of the threats and pitfalls of the real world and I think that makes her aware and helps in knowing that we trust her. It goes both ways.
I agree with what Michael said. I think the anti-technology families are going to be at a disadvantage as the kids get older. I see it with friends my age who don't know squat about computers, phones, facebook, itunes, etc. Their kids are learning on their own but there is NO supervision. That is when there is a problem!!

There are LOTS of educational apps out there for the iphone/ipad. I allow my just turned 6 year old to play on them when he asks. He is awesome at addition and subtraction already and I really think a good portion is due to an app on the ipad!! But he's also a super active kid - plays soccer, football and just today went for a 5 mile bike ride through our reservior!!

He also comes down and checks the weather on my ipad every morning - simple skill but he understands that 40° is cold and 70° is warm. Just little things like that where he is actually learning something that interests him. Personally I think its better than my little weather chart in the playroom that just says "its sunny" today.
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Ariana 05:33 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I did however hear that the brain games you mention about warding off alzheimers is a theory for adults and not for children. Apparently adult brains are very different than young brains just now creating those neural pathways. I think the brain games are meant to keep the already form pathways open, which wouldn't be much help if the pathway hasn't been formed at all yet.
Gosh I've never heard this!! I did a google search but wasn't able to find anything about it. I'm learning some of this stuff in my studies right now so I find it fascinating Kids actually have millions more pathways than adults so it will be interesting to see the studies and what they mean.
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Michael 05:44 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Ariana:
Gosh I've never heard this!! I did a google search but wasn't able to find anything about it. I'm learning some of this stuff in my studies right now so I find it fascinating Kids actually have millions more pathways than adults so it will be interesting to see the studies and what they mean.
I'll just play more poker when I get that old! I think card games play a big part in helping memory with older folks. Anyone play Canasta? www.CanastaMaster.com
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MrsB 06:06 PM 04-16-2012
Originally Posted by Ariana:
I have zero problems with technology or it's use even for kids. I DO have a problem when technology is used as a babysitter and takes the place of plain old interaction. This is the real problem.

My DH was addicted to video games as a kid and I played my fair share as well and watched a LOT of tv. I think we both turned out fairly well. It doesn't always destroy you.

Country Kids I had never heard of this. I have actually heard the opposite. Games (like iPhone games etc) actually help the brain form new neural pathways that ward off Alzheimers.
I'm with you.

My son has PDD-NOS and ADHD. And technology and computers can be used to help and hinder him.

He is amazing with techonology and has been since he was 2. Since he always seems to be labeled as different by his peers. His advanced technology skills give him an edge and an "in" with his peers that he may not have otherwise had. His teacher is always asking him for help. He now has an Ipad at school that the school provided him because he was failing writing. He is an amazing writer but his brain was going way to fast when writing than his hand could keep up with and his handwriting was aweful. He uses the speak to text app in school and has won a few local and state essay contests since. I am thrilled that some of his teachers are starting to use these tools to help kids that would have otherwise fallen through the cracks or been labelled as "bad" or "dumb".

On the otherside of the coin. Almost all the technology has really hindered his ability to be patient and motivate himself. With all the technology kids are getting to where they get an automatic response. This in some ways have made kids lazy. They are used to being externally motivated all the time and receiving a quick response to their requests which never teaches them how to internally motivate themselves. I have seen where my son doesnt get the concept of delayed gratification. If there is no instant gratification, he automatically thinks failure and defeat.

As a parent, I am always trying to find the delicate balance between the two.
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WImom 06:25 PM 04-16-2012
I have a set of twins that came to me and didn't know how to play. They just watched tv all day. The one DCB anytime I'm on my laptop he is looking over my shoulder, drives me nuts! I usually just say "go play toys". We do have computer time with me a few times a week where I have some kids doing table toys and some with me and he can't do the table toys, has to keep walking over to see what we are doing. I will usually make him go last when he does this. I don't know if he is just nosey or what. Both him and his sister know very well how to use the computer mouse and they are three so I assume they watch tv and play computer alot at home. These are also my two that I can't have any electronic toys out because they just hit buttons over and over and don't really play with the toy. So I got rid of the very few items I did have. It's like they have to hear the sound or somthing. The instant gratification thing is interesting since they are also my only two that throw themselves on the floor craying everyone time they can't do something the first time. Wonder if that has anything to do with it.

I'm happy my own kids (7.5y and 9y) can go a whole day without tv. They love to play outside and play pretend stuff in their playroom. They have great imaginations! Now I will say they do play Wii, DS and computer but are not obsessed with it. I think they are well rounded.
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My3cents 11:05 AM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by Michael:
My son sat on my lag at the computer when he was 2 years old and never left it. He is a 4.0 in college and just got an internship at JPL this summer. There is no getting away from the future and technology. There DOES need to be limitations and supervision. I think as long as they are using the technology for constructive purposes I'm ok with it.

I only allowed my daughter to have an iPhone at 12. She is homeschooled and it allows her to communicate with her friends. We make her aware of the threats and pitfalls of the real world and I think that makes her aware and helps in knowing that we trust her. It goes both ways.
I agree with this and I feel balance is what is needed. If you have a child that is angry after watching TV and won't transition into other things........well it is probably too much and an overload. Keeping a good balance is the key with anything- For me my daughter is an honor student, outgoing, for the most part a good child- she has her moments as all do. We trust our daughter, its the knuckleheads out there we don't trust. I like how you put it Michael, There is no getting around it.....moving forward in life is what we all strive for- just have to do it with caution.

Now I understand why your daughter has an iphone.....she prob uses it for looking information up with schooling. For me my daughter doesn't need that. She has an ipod. I don't have that type of phone. I have a penny phone. She wishes for a better phone but until she can pay for it herself, she is stuck with whatever plan we offer her and what phone we feel is right for her. Her phone is better then ours....lol, but not the internet and all the bells and whistles. Every family is different and whatever works for you .......great.
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jojosmommy 11:12 AM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by Michael:
My son sat on my lag at the computer when he was 2 years old and never left it. He is a 4.0 in college and just got an internship at JPL this summer. There is no getting away from the future and technology. There DOES need to be limitations and supervision. I think as long as they are using the technology for constructive purposes I'm ok with it.

I only allowed my daughter to have an iPhone at 12. She is homeschooled and it allows her to communicate with her friends. We make her aware of the threats and pitfalls of the real world and I think that makes her aware and helps in knowing that we trust her. It goes both ways.
I think the key difference between your example and my dck who can not function without something electronic telling him what to do next is parenting. You obviously took interest in WHAT and HOW MUCH technology your kids are involved in. It wasn't used as a sitter-like someone else mentioned- but a tool to move forward in life.

I like the checking the weather idea. Good way to teach a life skill and planning ahead.
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countrymom 11:25 AM 04-17-2012
I think the key word is "balance" we have lots of techy stuff in our house and its all about balance. I have a dcb (he's 6) so he only comes on days off or the summer. Well he's so into his games that when they went on vacation, his chip for the ds broke, that he had a melt down for 2 hours that mom and dad almost had to come home (gma was watching them) like who does that, and when he comes, all he does is play his ds. My ds loves techy stuff but he does things with it (he makes amazing videos and he's only 9)
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countrymom 11:27 AM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by bbo:
nope, you are not nuts and you are not acting like an 80 year old.

The fact is that our children do need to know more about technology than we ever did, but that does not mean that a child under 5 needs to be spoon-fed crap from some sort of screen every waking minute.

My own kids are pretty technology obsessed, but that's balanced with lots of outdoor play time, camping, dances (my daughter), school, a school play & choir, reading, and more. Once in a while, I have to reign in the screen-time, but it also depends on the time of year. In the winter, they tend to spend more time with electronics. In the summer, they hardly touch them.

My 14 year old spends a lot of her computer time writing on blogs and "fan fiction" sites. She has a tv in her room, but hardly watches it. My 11 yo boy, on the other hand, just wants to play Minecraft..
what is fan fiction. my dd is reading stories from some "word" site, I don't know the name of it but she said the stories are really good. She is 14 also.
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Crazy8 11:35 AM 04-17-2012
Originally Posted by countrymom:
what is fan fiction. my dd is reading stories from some "word" site, I don't know the name of it but she said the stories are really good. She is 14 also.
no offense to you countrymom, but you NEED to know the name of the sites your DD is reading on!!!

fanfiction are stories/books made up by "fans" of a show/movie/character. For instance for all the Twilight fans there are HUGE amounts of stories made up using the characters Edward & Bella. Some are true to the "real" story - others are completely different. Many are R or even nearly X rated. This is why parent involvement/supervision is so important!!!!

www.fanfiction.net is a big one where people post stories for all different types of fanfiction!
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