I have one child that is 18 months old. She is becoming quite difficult.

This morning at drop off, DCD was holding DCK and handed her to me. I hardly ever ever ever carry kids while standing, but DCD handed her off to me and I was caught off guard. I am standing there holding DCK and she throws her self back, head first and THANK GOODNESS for my superman (LOL JK) like reflexes, I catch her before she slams her head into a book case end.

She has been doing this more and more. She does it when we are on the floor too. I was reading a book to her this morning and she got up from my lap, stood up and then threw her head back busting my lip open. I told her no and set her on the floor and walked away from her. She is not phased by it, laughs and moves on.

I don't even know what to do here or how to stop her from doing this. I have never had a child do this...

Reply

I have a dcb who constantly will throw his head back when he is doing something wrong and I tell him not to do it. He will also bang his head on my wall or hit the wall or floor as hard as he can. It's so strange to me, it has to hurt!

It sounds mean, but I just tell the child what he is doing (for instance, "M. you are throwing my toys and could hurt someone") and then walk away and let him do it, I should say that do make sure he is on the carpet and not by things that he could get hurt on. If I try to stop him, he screams louder and will do it harder and at me. Hopefully one day he will realize that is hurts!

Reply

I've had many one year olds go through this phase. Especially when having to leave the park. This or the wet noddle phase where they won't let you stand them up. It's dangerous.

I've heard the little one below did just this - got upset, arched and threw self backwards. So sad

http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/...rticle4216287/

Reply

the thing is, is that she is not doing it when she is upset, she does it all the time with NO warning......

Reply

Unless there is an underlying disorder I just let them have at it.

Document with parents that it is occuring, that this is your plan and they're on board, and then just date and time everytime the child does it.

If you give it any attention at all you feed it. Ignore, and impress upon the other kids that youre going to go into the other room and do something fun to keep them from feeding into it too.

Definitely watch for triggers and do a scoop/hug if you see things about to go that direction but otherwise just let er buck. I would not kiss those boo-boos nor would I look at or talk to the child again until they had calmed all the way back down.

Reply

OMG that is soooooooo sad. UGH..... I told all of my asst that I don't want them holding any of the kids at all and that when she does it to tell her no, push her off of us and walk away.

I don't know how else I can prevent her from doing this, I know it is a phase.

Reply

thanks for the advise willow, but she is not doing it while upset, she just does it out of no where. NO warning, I don't even see it coming.

Reply

I doesn't sound like there is much you can do if you don't know when she is going to do it. Hopefully it is just a phase and doesn't last long!

Reply

at this point, I am thinking that maybe I am not going to hold her at all in my lap on the floor while sitting. I know she needs affection, but the last thing that I need is her doing what she did to me to anyone else.

Looks like I am leaving now to go get stitches in my lip from her hitting me with her head.

Reply

A lot of times moms, dads or relatives will make it a fun game for kids to fall back and then be caught/rescued. Or they find out if they squirm the way the child in the link did nearly causing them to fall it'll catch their attention.

I'd ask about that.

That it happened during a pass off would tell me they're somehow rooted in frustration, angst or manipulation (not always devious in nature, but in the sense that they've learned the behavior *will* get a reaction).

Reply

One of my guys right now (his last day today), started pitching his head back like that at about 12 months of age. Mainly to mom because he hit a stage where it became funny to hurt her. Strong kid, built like brick s#&thouse and very coordinated. I saw him crack her good a few times at pick ups if she lingered too long and once at home he almost busted her nose (came the next day with black eyes he hit her so hard!) I refused to pick him up or allow him to sit in my lap at that point, always held him at a distance if I had to move him down the stairs to get outside.

He tried it with his teenaged uncle and barely missed his nose. The next time he reared forward ready to fling his head back uncle looked down so booger cracked the back of his head full force on uncles bony forehead instead of the softness of facial features.

They didnt have a problem with him ever doing it again lol


Always keep her arms length away and keep fingers shes got a hard headed uncle around thats going to set her straight soon. I do hope your lip is going to be ok, that always smarts

Reply

I would try a firm NO

NO, you don't do that!

Not screaming but raise your voice up a level so she knows you mean business.

Wet noodle- I have one of those. He is 3 When he doesn't stand up, he is set wherever he is until he does. I just try not to feed into it. He gets no reaction from me for that behavior. He usually will come around.

Reply

just got back. 11 stitches in my lip....WONDERFUL.

thanks so much for the advise from all.

I am going to do as you all suggested. NO more holding, no more laps, we can give hugs and put our arms on her while she is sitting to make her feel secure and loved.

I will be raising my voice with a firm NO and walk away.

I also plan on telling DCP about it at pickup today. They are such a great family and I don't want them to feel bad for what happened to my lip. Gosh I don't want to tell anyone what happened. BUT you know kids, they will tell anyone who will listen.

they all saw it happen.

Reply

OMG 11 stitches in your lip???? my son had 6 stitches in his pinky and it was like half the length of his finger! Oh my! So sorry!!

Reply

Oh my goodness,11????

That must have hurt! I'm sorry!

I understand things happen but I termed a kid who threw his head back and got me under the chin. It knocked my teeth together and I couldn't see any thing but black for about 10 seconds.

If she throws herself back and seriously hurts herself, how do you think the parents will react?

Reply

I feel like a fish lip.....lol. My tooth went partly through, so I had 8 on the outside of my lip and 3 on the inside. There goes my whole plan of eating for my new work out....ugh I am going to probably lose weight now.....this stinks

Reply

The parents are really nice, I had their older child for 3 years. It's one of those things that people always start off nice, but then if something happens you never know how they will react.

I plan to talk to DCM about it and let her know that it is a huge concern for me and what we are doing here. I am going to ask her that she makes sure that she does not allow for her to do it at home and discourages it as much as possible.

I am pretty certain that they will be on board with me, we have never had anything like this happen before.

Reply

Wow! Sorry you had to get all those stitches!

Reply

My daughter tried it once when she was a year old but at the time, I was holding a hard toy and my Spider-man reflexes pulled up the toy in front of my face and WHAMMO!!! She never did it again.

My special dcg when she does something she shouldn't like try to climb on something and I go to move her, she'll wet noodle. So I just lay her on her back and walk away. She's hitting her terrible twos. Medically fragile child hitting terrible twos... This is going to be fun..

Sorry about your lip though!! Ice if it swells!!

Reply

Thanks for sharing your stories and glad to know that it really is just a phase. I really hope that it ends soon. Who knows what she will hit her head with next...

Reply

Generally, yes, it's a phase and it takes a natural consequence to get the point across quicker.

Reply

I hope that this natural consequence does not happen on my time, but happens soon because right now I am the only one suffering.....lol

Reply

Lol...well not lol.... But u know what I mean.

Yes, yu got the natural consequence this time.

But the point is that the CHILD gets it lol

Reply

My son did this. One day I just put my head, down and when he threw his head back, I was ready for it, and he popped into my head. It stung, but it wasn't too bad, and I was expecting it. He didn't do it again. I have a really hard head.

Reply

Were the parents apologetic? Sorry that happened to you

Reply

Yes the mom almost cried because she felt so bad.

She did tell me that her dady throws her upside down all the time like a game but will tell them no more.

She could not stop apologizing. I told her accidents happen.

Reply

Aw, someone should bring you some pie.

Reply

Lol. Hahahaha the pie thread.

Reply