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MsLaura529 09:21 AM 08-26-2014
Is it wrong for me to let a family go because mom is pregnant and I just cannot handle another infant?

I love this family, they are awesome. DCB is 2.5 ... he has had his troubles, but is also sweet and hilarious. DCM is pregnant, due in Feb, and I have come to the conclusion that I do not want to care for infants anymore. It stresses me out to have an infant here (right now I have a 10 month old DCG, she's been here since she was 3 months). It completely throws off our routine and schedule, and changes the type of atmosphere and care I want to do. I am nauseas just thinking about telling them this ...

Anyone done this before? Any key words or things I should say to help this go smoothly?
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Laurel 09:26 AM 08-26-2014
Originally Posted by MsLaura529:
Is it wrong for me to let a family go because mom is pregnant and I just cannot handle another infant?

I love this family, they are awesome. DCB is 2.5 ... he has had his troubles, but is also sweet and hilarious. DCM is pregnant, due in Feb, and I have come to the conclusion that I do not want to care for infants anymore. It stresses me out to have an infant here (right now I have a 10 month old DCG, she's been here since she was 3 months). It completely throws off our routine and schedule, and changes the type of atmosphere and care I want to do. I am nauseas just thinking about telling them this ...

Anyone done this before? Any key words or things I should say to help this go smoothly?
I would just say that I have decided not to take infants anymore...any infants. "It's nothing personal. I'd love to keep older child but I can understand if you'd rather have them somewhere together." If she asks why no infants I'd just tell her that the two age groups together don't make for a harmonious day and you've decided that it just doesn't work for you. Then let her decide if she wants to keep the older child with you.

Laurel
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Blackcat31 09:30 AM 08-26-2014
Also you could let the DCM know that you are no longer taking infants but if she wants to make other arrangements for the infant until they are older, you will take the child then and still keep the older sibling

I used to not take any infants and when I had a current family that was expecting, they just made alternate arrangements for the infant until they were old enough to attend.

Now I ONLY take infants of currently enrolled families and only then at 6 months so everyone makes other arrangements until then.
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TaylorTots 10:48 AM 08-26-2014
Do what's best for you, regardless of whether it's "wrong" in someone else's eyes, as long as it doesn't break your policies - and if it does then edit your policies before hand and have parents sign to the updates before you do what you need to do.


I have a family pregnant due in December. In January I plan on terming a family of two 3-year-old twins that used to be good playmates with my DD but now just cause fights all.day.long. so give one of their spots to the infant.
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Lucy 11:17 AM 08-26-2014
Originally Posted by MsLaura529:
Is it wrong for me to let a family go because mom is pregnant and I just cannot handle another infant?

Not at ALL!!!

I had a girl from age 1 through 3. Mom was expecting, and asked if I'd take the baby. I had previously decided not to take any more newborns, so I said, "Congratulations!! Unfortunately, I'm not taking newborns anymore. I'm betting you don't want to split the kids up, but (3yo) is welcome to continue attending!"

She didn't stay, which I figured would happen. But it went very smoothly.
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Go play! 11:41 AM 08-26-2014
All the infants I have taken as siblings so far, the mom gets back to work and realizes it's not worth the money. I always cheer them on to stay home with the kids but I have lost 2 kids after holding infant spots twice. Don't feel bad. I don't think I will be taking them anymore either.
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AmyKidsCo 01:06 PM 08-26-2014
The other thing to consider is that when you have siblings it's a larger loss of income if/when that family leaves. My group center friends don't understand my panic when a child leaves care until I point out that for me 1 child is almost 20% of my total enrollment and income.
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cheerfuldom 01:43 PM 08-26-2014
When is the baby's start date? I wouldnt say anything now in case she pulls both kids. I would wait it out and let her know like 8 weeks before start date. You may change your mind before then but either way, you will have the older for sure till then.
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MsLaura529 07:29 AM 08-27-2014
Thanks for the support ladies. I am just feeling so sick about this, but I know that I absolutely do not want another infant coming through here.


Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
When is the baby's start date? I wouldnt say anything now in case she pulls both kids. I would wait it out and let her know like 8 weeks before start date. You may change your mind before then but either way, you will have the older for sure till then.
See, I almost feel like this would be a jerk move, and would seem like I'm almost trying to pull one over on them. Finding a home childcare around this area is tough, and they will have to find something for 2. I want to give them plenty of time to handle the situation, even if it means pulling early. I can always advertise for an open spot in the mean time.
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MsLaura529 07:35 AM 08-27-2014
Now another question - I HATE confrontation. It gives me great anxiety. Or being the bearer of bad news. Do I have to do this as a face-to-face thing? I know I probably need to, but in situations like this, I tend to ramble and cry. However, since I really like this family, I don't want to just hand them a short "I will no longer be able to provide care for ...." letter and call it a day. What do I do??
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Daycaregranny 06:58 PM 08-27-2014
I would ramble and cry. Haha. They know you and how much you care.
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cheerfuldom 06:08 AM 08-28-2014
Originally Posted by MsLaura529:
Thanks for the support ladies. I am just feeling so sick about this, but I know that I absolutely do not want another infant coming through here.




See, I almost feel like this would be a jerk move, and would seem like I'm almost trying to pull one over on them. Finding a home childcare around this area is tough, and they will have to find something for 2. I want to give them plenty of time to handle the situation, even if it means pulling early. I can always advertise for an open spot in the mean time.
They dont have to find places for two as you could offer to keep one and if you insist on doing it now, just tell them in person. You have decided to make some changes to the daycare and will no longer be accepting infants. This gives them plenty of time to find infant care. If they want to find a spot for both kids at the same place, you understand, but you will require notice for the older sib per your contract. You are also willing to keep big brother.

Its not a big deal. I think you are way over thinking this. just rip that bandaid off and let it be.
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MsLaura529 06:45 AM 08-29-2014
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
They dont have to find places for two as you could offer to keep one and if you insist on doing it now, just tell them in person. You have decided to make some changes to the daycare and will no longer be accepting infants. This gives them plenty of time to find infant care. If they want to find a spot for both kids at the same place, you understand, but you will require notice for the older sib per your contract. You are also willing to keep big brother.

Its not a big deal. I think you are way over thinking this. just rip that bandaid off and let it be.
hah, story of my life
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knoxmomof2 08:36 AM 08-30-2014
OT question here, but: I'm fairly new to this - almost 2 years.... Why no infants? I'm considering taking on a 4th in a couple of months and thinking am infant would be nice. Please tell me more.
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Crazy8 06:27 PM 08-31-2014
I would leave it up to them when the time comes. I wouldn't type up a formal letter or anything about it. Does she ever mention bringing the new baby to you?? If she does I would use that opportunity to say that you've really thought about it and (like a post above said) let her know it is nothing personal but you won't be taking on any more infants, and explain your reasoning. Let her know you know this may put her in a bind but if she'd like to find another daycare for the baby until they are 12 months (or whatever age you'd take them) that you would love to keep older sibling, or that you understand if she'd like to keep them together and find another arrangement for both of them. I would just talk to her - communication is key. She may decide to keep the sibling with you and find something else for baby. You never know! Let her know they are a wonderful family and its nothing personal, its just the baby thing!!
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