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Old 10-10-2019, 12:20 AM
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Unhappy Advice to Make Sure We’re Protected

My 3yo was dismissed from daycare for an injury caused to another child. My husband was informed verbally at pick up and In front of our child & when I asked to speak with my provider, I was informed via txt that there was nothing to discuss. Through txt, I was informed that my 3 yo doesn’t listen (along with the comment that she doesn’t listen to me or my husband). We were given two weeks but we made arrangements. My 3yo is aware of what happened and the consequences. I didn’t want to confuse her further. TBH she’d had a bad day a few weeks ago but there has been no indication that she doesn’t listen at all. The only details I have are from my 3yo. We had been debating moving to preschool since last spring & have enrolled her in one. We’d been at this daycare for 2 years and thought of them as family. I’m trying to juggle my child’s emotions (her dollie got hurt since she wasn’t being a good listener) with my own emotions (feel betrayed she spent more time with my kid then me). Advice on how to help my lo process this - she’s been super clingy since it happened. To date, I have not seen anything other than txt messages. We are focused on the excitement of starting preschool but I want to make sure that my family is protected. Should I have seen an incident report? Letter explaining termination? I don’t want to seem retaliatory - I want my lo to move on to preschool and remember her time in daycare fondly.
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Old 10-10-2019, 05:55 AM
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rosieteddy rosieteddy is online now
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As a provider for 25+years children act out.If I were in your shoes I would move on.Try not to discuss things in front of your child.Adults don't think kids listen but you would be surprised.She will miss her DC but in a short time forget all about them.Play up the new "school".If possible take vacation time instead of trying to fill in care while waiting for preschool.As far as the provider ,she must have had a reason ,maybe she let things slide and didn't tell you every little thing.I often dealt with the children myself as in taught them how to be nice and listen.Could have been the last straw and she terminated.Fill your days with fun and enjoy this next adventure with your child.
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Old 10-10-2019, 06:14 AM
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My 3yo was dismissed from daycare for an injury caused to another child. My husband was informed verbally at pick up and In front of our child & when I asked to speak with my provider, I was informed via txt that there was nothing to discuss. Through txt, I was informed that my 3 yo doesn’t listen (along with the comment that she doesn’t listen to me or my husband). We were given two weeks but we made arrangements. My 3yo is aware of what happened and the consequences. I didn’t want to confuse her further. TBH she’d had a bad day a few weeks ago but there has been no indication that she doesn’t listen at all. The only details I have are from my 3yo. We had been debating moving to preschool since last spring & have enrolled her in one. We’d been at this daycare for 2 years and thought of them as family. I’m trying to juggle my child’s emotions (her dollie got hurt since she wasn’t being a good listener) with my own emotions (feel betrayed she spent more time with my kid then me). Advice on how to help my lo process this - she’s been super clingy since it happened. To date, I have not seen anything other than txt messages. We are focused on the excitement of starting preschool but I want to make sure that my family is protected. Should I have seen an incident report? Letter explaining termination? I don’t want to seem retaliatory - I want my lo to move on to preschool and remember her time in daycare fondly.
I don't understand what you mean by making sure your family is protected. Protected from what?

Also what do you mean by not wanting to be retaliatory?

I agree with Rosie... I would simply focus on the exciting things to come in preschool and make the change towards big girl school the center of discussion etc. If you had been planning on moving to a preschool, I'd move along like nothing has changed.
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Old 10-11-2019, 03:34 PM
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I would be hurt, too, but I don't think you need to be worried about being protected. At 3 years old, I do not think you would be legally responsible for even the willful misconduct of your child while she was in someone else's care. Whoever is supervising her would be more liable, I would think, so perhaps that is why she felt the need to dismiss your child.

Just supposing here, but if she bit another child, then maybe the provider is worried about having to pay for a medical check up for the injured child or the loss of income if the family of the injured child leaves.

I would play up excitement of the new preschool. On a related note, you said she spent more time with the provider than you. I get it; I am a busy working mom, too. But, if at all possible, could other family members help out (grandma, aunt, dad, anyone) or can you juggle your work hours so that the person she spends the most time is with you? You are the biggest influence on your child, and she should have more one on one time with you than any other single person if at all possible at that age. Sometimes, that is just not possible, but if you can, something to consider.
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long hours in care, terminate - bad behavior, terminate - bad fit, violence in child care

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