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Unregistered 05:50 AM 02-18-2011
As a parent would you be upset if you found out that your provider went out drinking with friends every friday night after work? That she was having a beer or two after work here and there? Would this be a red flag for you or would you care?
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jen 06:02 AM 02-18-2011
Uhmmm...I hope you aren't serious?

Why in the world, if it isn't illegal, would it be any of your business what she does after hours?
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DCMomOf3 06:05 AM 02-18-2011
As a parent and a provider, (and as one who has recently taken to meeting up with my neighbors Friday nights), no. Getting out with friends, and drinking a beer or two on a Friday after work should not ever be a concern for parents. IF they show signs of abusing alcohol that is different but a couple of drinks on a weekend is not a parents business. JMO.
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nikia 06:11 AM 02-18-2011
Why would you be upset? She isn't working and she is allowed to have a life outside of taking care of kids. If it doesn't effect her doing her job its none of your business. I say this as a parent who took my kids to daycare and as someone who runs there own daycare now.
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KEG123 06:13 AM 02-18-2011
Seriously? No.. As long as she's not drinking on the job, WHO CARES what she does?! In fact, I've posted a link to this before... and we all got a laugh out of it! http://www.cafepress.com/+youd_drink...hirt,261379758
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bgmeyers 06:17 AM 02-18-2011
I used to have a mom who was my last pickup every Friday. She'd bring me a bottle of wine and tell me to enjoy. I am a responsible adult, who cares what I do after hours? I'm not doing anything illegal or immoral.
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Angelwings36 06:19 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by KEG123:
Seriously? No.. As long as she's not drinking on the job, WHO CARES what she does?! In fact, I've posted a link to this before... and we all got a laugh out of it! http://www.cafepress.com/+youd_drink...hirt,261379758
Oooo KEG123 I love it! I'm gonna save that link to show my gf when she gets here after work. She fills in for me from time to time if I have apts and what not so she will appreciate this lol!
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Little People 06:26 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
As a parent would you be upset if you found out that your provider went out drinking with friends every friday night after work? That she was having a beer or two after work here and there? Would this be a red flag for you or would you care?
I don't drink so I can't answer this. But, why would a dcp want to be in her providers after hours and weekend business? It would be the same thing if a dcp saw a provider at the store buying thongs, would a dcp have the right to tell a provider what kind of undies she could wear??

What if a dcp saw a provider at the river and provider had on a skimpy swim suit, would the dcp have the right to tell her to wear a cover up??

So the dcp's BOSS FROM HER WORK saw her at a place having a few beers would the boss have a right to FIRE her or would he see this as a red flag?

I say STAY out of daycare providers after hours business!!
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Blackcat31 07:17 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
As a parent would you be upset if you found out that your provider went out drinking with friends every friday night after work? That she was having a beer or two after work here and there? Would this be a red flag for you or would you care?
HOW do you know she is out drinking with friends every Friday night after work...Ummm, did you see her in the bar? You mean you were there too and it is okay for you to be there but not for her? Or is it hearsay? Which in my opinion is gossip...so either way you have NO business barking up this tree.....what anyone who lives in a free country does outside of actual business hours is NO ONES business but theirs!!!
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daycare 07:30 AM 02-18-2011
I am laughing so hard right now its not even funny!! This is a real post? Or a post to see who drinks?

Well either way, i dont thinks its anyones business what one does after they are off the clock. However, if they are posting crazy stuff on Face Book of them doing beer bongs with a tub full of jello in the back ground, then that might be a whole different post/story.........lol

just becuase you don't agree with what one does with their life, does not mean that they are a bad person, nor are they wrong.

Look at it this way...as long as your child is being loved and cared for by this person, who cares what the provider does in her free time....
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dEHmom 07:46 AM 02-18-2011
hmmm....I have a treasure chest under my bed with lots of fun stuff

does this affect how I take care of children? NOPE

I have a cupboard filled with alcohol, shooters, etc and I drink most weekends...

Does this affect how I take care of children? NOPE

I like to use the F word alot...

Would I use it during daycare hours? NOPE

It's maintaining a professional life, and a personal life with a clear line, and not crossing that line.

It's none of your business, don't know why you would think it was your business.
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Blackcat31 07:48 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
hmmm....I have a treasure chest under my bed with lots of fun stuff

does this affect how I take care of children? NOPE

I have a cupboard filled with alcohol, shooters, etc and I drink most weekends...

Does this affect how I take care of children? NOPE

I like to use the F word alot...

Would I use it during daycare hours? NOPE

It's maintaining a professional life, and a personal life with a clear line, and not crossing that line.

It's none of your business, don't know why you would think it was your business.

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daycare 07:49 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
hmmm....I have a treasure chest under my bed with lots of fun stuff

does this affect how I take care of children? NOPE

I have a cupboard filled with alcohol, shooters, etc and I drink most weekends...

Does this affect how I take care of children? NOPE

I like to use the F word alot...

Would I use it during daycare hours? NOPE

It's maintaining a professional life, and a personal life with a clear line, and not crossing that line.

It's none of your business, don't know why you would think it was your business.
Im coming to your house!!! lmao great post!!
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dEHmom 07:50 AM 02-18-2011
come on over, I make a mean dirty hooker!
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daycare 07:56 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
come on over, I make a mean dirty hooker!
lmao TGIF MAMA!! I am so happy to wake up this morning and able to read your ladies crazy ,funny, over the top pee in my pants (ok not yet) post!!

thanks..... btw whats in a dirty hooker......sounds so mysterious.....
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AfterSchoolMom 08:00 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by daycare:
I am laughing so hard right now its not even funny!! This is a real post? Or a post to see who drinks?

Well either way, i dont thinks its anyones business what one does after they are off the clock. However, if they are posting crazy stuff on Face Book of them doing beer bongs with a tub full of jello in the back ground, then that might be a whole different post/story.........lol
....
Even IF they posted pics of them drinking, etc. on facebook...the only way I'd think it would be a problem would be if there were children standing around in the background watching, or if they posted about doing drugs or other illegal activities. There's a difference between someone who drinks on weekends and someone who is an alcoholic and can't do her job during the week.

I think there's a definite line between our professional and personal lives. I'm a grown up and I'll do what I please (within legal boundaries, of course) on my own time.
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dEHmom 08:01 AM 02-18-2011
who said it was something with ingredients? jk.


sometimes, if I'm running out of stuff, I put whatever I want in it. usually those are the meanest ones.
I'll post the recipe elsewhere....
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daycare 08:02 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
who said it was something with ingredients? jk.


sometimes, if I'm running out of stuff, I put whatever I want in it. usually those are the meanest ones.
I'll post the recipe elsewhere....
lmao its not even 9am here yet....lol I just can't stop laughing...
Ok you can PM the recipe later... gotta run kids are starting to come..
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daycare 08:03 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
Even IF they posted pics of them drinking, etc. on facebook...the only way I'd think it would be a problem would be if there were children standing around in the background watching, or if they posted about doing drugs or other illegal activities. There's a difference between someone who drinks on weekends and someone who is an alcoholic and can't do her job during the week.

I think there's a definite line between our professional and personal lives. I'm a grown up and I'll do what I please (within legal boundaries, of course) on my own time.
yes you are right...I did leave that out.... no kids in the jello tub while drinking...lol JK I know what you mean and yes I think your post hit it right on the head...
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dEHmom 08:10 AM 02-18-2011
oh shoot.......

note to self.....


don't make the kids jello cups at same time as the adult jello cups...
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Cat Herder 08:17 AM 02-18-2011
Only if:

1. She purposefully lied to me during the interview, before I signed the contract, knowing it was one of my hot button issues. (if it were)

2. She had a history of alcoholism that she informed me of during her interview process.

3. My child was contracted in care during evening and weekends when this was going on.

4. Her background check showed prior DUI arrests. This would signify a person who makes irresponsible/reckless life choices, IMHEO.

Other than that it is really none of my business.
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littlemissmuffet 08:39 AM 02-18-2011
It's Friday!! As soon as my door closes at 5:30pm, I am having a beer! I deserve it, and not one of my parents would think of saying otherwise.
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JenNJ 08:43 AM 02-18-2011
OP, I'm not sure what you do as a job but I'm going to ask these questions.

Do your clients/co-workers/supervisors drink when not working? Do you? Does your spouse drink when not working? Does alcohol consumption on a Friday night still leave a person intoxicated by Monday morning?

A beer or 2 does NOT indicate an alcohol problem. Butt out of your providers PERSONAL life. It doesn't matter if your provider told you this, you saw it on FB, or you heard it through local gossip. It is none of your damn business. And if you are so uptight that you can't deal with it - get a new provider.
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daycare 08:49 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by JenNJ:
OP, I'm not sure what you do as a job but I'm going to ask these questions.

Do your clients/co-workers/supervisors drink when not working? Do you? Does your spouse drink when not working? Does alcohol consumption on a Friday night still leave a person intoxicated by Monday morning?

A beer or 2 does NOT indicate an alcohol problem. Butt out of your providers PERSONAL life. It doesn't matter if your provider told you this, you saw it on FB, or you heard it through local gossip. It is none of your damn business. And if you are so uptight that you can't deal with it - get a new provider.
I am singing ...............go jen....go jen.....go jen.............. lmao

I can see you shaking your head as you say this.....love it
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lil angels 08:49 AM 02-18-2011
OMG is she supposed to sick like a lady and cross her legs and put her hands in her lap. Really she is OK she can enjoy sometimes or your kids wouldn't want to be around her. We all have to have things to look forward to right? Let her be it is her time off of work.

You prob didn't think you would get picked apart like this for posting but REALLY! Unless you smell booze on her when you arrive monday morning Don't think anything of it!!!!
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dEHmom 08:53 AM 02-18-2011
who knows, maybe its your kid causing her to need that friday night alcoholic beverages!
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daycare 09:04 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
who knows, maybe its your kid causing her to need that friday night alcoholic beverages!
i thought it........................but glad you wrote it.............................sorry too funny....

later this weekend if I decide to have a drink I am going to be thinking of you.....umm yeah that sounded kinda bad...........
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dEHmom 09:08 AM 02-18-2011
I deleted it before. I had wrote it. Thought better about posting it, but then changed my mind.

IT's simply the truth.

And honestly, IMHO (yay I used it!) the parents who are uptight, and think their children are the perfect little angels, are so dead wrong. All their overbearingness has caused the children to become so rebellious when parents aren't looking that we HAVE TO drink or do something to stay sane.
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DCMom 09:22 AM 02-18-2011
To the op ~ why are you asking this?


Obviously we are all a bunch of lushes but that is besides the point

In the summer, most Fridays I have 'Happy Hour Under the Deck' and nearly half of my daycare parents participate. So that kinda sums up how I feel about it, lol.
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dEHmom 09:25 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by DCMom:
In the summer, most Fridays I have 'Happy Hour Under the Deck' and nearly half of my daycare parents participate. So that kinda sums up how I feel about it, lol.
Happy Hour UNDER the deck? Not sure what I am picturing is what was meant :P
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DCMom 09:30 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
Happy Hour UNDER the deck? Not sure what I am picturing is what was meant :P
LOL ~ no that's not where we end up!

My daycare is in the walkout lower level of my house and the deck comes off my main level so there is room underneath. It's the only shade on a hot summer day...

Now I am longing for a happy hour under the deck....
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melskids 09:34 AM 02-18-2011
i think i'd be more upset if i found out she watches FOX news.



sorry i couldn't resist
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dEHmom 09:35 AM 02-18-2011
hahahaha.

One of my dcm's is hilarious once we got over the awkwardness of everything. And once facebook friended, we discovered our hubs used to hang out and party together! omg lol!

We have become very close and now friends (although I wouldn't do this normally). They are leaving really soon, she is prego. They just bought a house close to mine so we will be hanging out when she's on mat leave.

She would be the one parent I truly see this happening with. She's already admitted we will be drinking together after baby is born. lol.
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daycare 09:35 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by DCMom:
LOL ~ no that's not where we end up!

My daycare is in the walkout lower level of my house and the deck comes off my main level so there is room underneath. It's the only shade on a hot summer day...

Now I am longing for a happy hour under the deck....
ahhhhh wow I just cant stop laughing at both of your post...

No thats not where we end up.............now this was a funny vision...

yes a friday thread is needed...this is some funny funny stuff...
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dEHmom 09:37 AM 02-18-2011
although I'm suffering from PINKEYE! GAAAAWWWWWWWSHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

I am in a great mood today. Must be the homemade butter on soda crackers. HAHAHAHA. I can justify it though because I shook 1 L of cream to make 2 cups of butter. So I'm just putting back on what I took off making it.

Snow day so I don't have to go outside to take/get kiddies from school.

No daycare kids. And i did enough laundry yesterday for a week, so I don't have to do anything but vacuum half hour before hubby gets home.
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DCMomOf3 09:39 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by daycare:
yes a friday thread is needed...this is some funny funny stuff...
i still wish we could pull off the daycare provider 'educational' cruise.
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dEHmom 09:54 AM 02-18-2011
Closest to that I could afford is my monthly internet bill.

Michael will have to create a page on here for us with a cruise ship, maybe an interactive style like SIMS! lol. Am I asking too much?
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momofsix 10:13 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
As a parent would you be upset if you found out that your provider went out drinking with friends every friday night after work? That she was having a beer or two after work here and there? Would this be a red flag for you or would you care?
OK...I must be really slow, or it's still the strep clouding my thinking. When I read this I seriously thought it was a provider asking the question to parents. Like she went out and was worried her parents might not like it.

My answer would still be the same though.
A provider is held to a higher standard than other people and SHOULD NOT EVER drink in public! Or smoke, dance, gamble, wear a bikini... She may get totally wasted in private though!



JUST KIDDING!!!!
Unless she does something totally irresponsible like drinking and driving, which would mean she has a problem with alcohol, it shouldn't matter in the least what she does on her own time.
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MARSTELAC 10:24 AM 02-18-2011
who wants to meet up tonight for a beer? LOL! I don't drink beer, but I will for tonight, just for kicks and giggles
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dEHmom 10:25 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by momofsix:
My answer would still be the same though.
A provider is held to a higher standard than other people and SHOULD NOT EVER drink in public! Or smoke, dance, gamble, wear a bikini... She may get totally wasted in private though!
You are very right even though you were joking.

Same with teachers. I mean what you do in your personal life is fine. But honestly, would you want a stripper watching your child? Likely not.
Would you want an alcoholic watching your child? Likely not.

But I also know alcoholics who are top notch lawyers. They will have their downfall one day though, sooner or later.

I agree though, as a professional, you need to watch how you behave, dress, etc outside of business. Not saying you cannot wear a bikini, but keep it decent. What if little timmy sees you at the beach, and you're barely covering your nipples and buttox! Get my drift?

If you are drinking in a bar, not likely Tommy will see you, and if his parents do, well they are in the bar too! But behave properly. Don't be a donkey.

Your private life is separate from your business life, but you do have to carry a certain professionalism outside of your business.

To me, this is all the same as the latest gossip about celebrities. You have to remember, that your personal life can and sometimes will carry over into your professional life. So behaving appropriately is always the way to go. Absolutely nothing wrong with drinking, as long as it's responsibly.
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dEHmom 10:27 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by MARSTELAC:
who wants to meet up tonight for a beer? LOL! I don't drink beer, but I will for tonight, just for kicks and giggles
SERIOUSLY! MICHAEL we need a SIMS website for us who are providers. And it must include a bar!
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Cat Herder 10:34 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
SERIOUSLY! MICHAEL we need a SIMS website for us who are providers. And it must include a bar!
Ok, I will be the one who lives under a rock..... WTH is a SIMS website????
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dEHmom 10:37 AM 02-18-2011
you don't know who the SIMS are?

It's a game thingy dingy where you create your own person, and you walk around in like a virtual world. But you interact with OTHER people. You can go shopping, dining, etc. It would be fudging awesome if we could go to the bar, or on a cruise together! FOR REAL but Virtually. lol.

Google SIMS
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Blackcat31 10:40 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
Ok, I will be the one who lives under a rock..... WTH is a SIMS website????
Don't feel bad because I am going to be the dumb blonde and say yeah, what is a SIMS website? I play and LOVE The Sims 2 and 3 (EA computer games), but can't figure out how they would relate to this?!!?!? I must be over-(or under)thinking things today........must be the hangover from last night!
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Lilbutterflie 10:42 AM 02-18-2011
I just got around to reading this thread.

You ladies crack me up!
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Cat Herder 10:44 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
you don't know who the SIMS are?

It's a game thingy dingy where you create your own person, and you walk around in like a virtual world. But you interact with OTHER people. You can go shopping, dining, etc. It would be fudging awesome if we could go to the bar, or on a cruise together! FOR REAL but Virtually. lol.

Google SIMS
Ok, I googled....

Fan-freaking-tastic......

My 14 year old daughter bought a couple of those computer cd games with Christmas Money, but I did not know she could be interacting with other people like on facebook (where I can see who she is talking to with her password)...

Grrr.... I miss Zoo Empire.... This is getting too hard.

Sorry, op....back to your topic....
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daycare 11:11 AM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by MARSTELAC:
who wants to meet up tonight for a beer? LOL! I don't drink beer, but I will for tonight, just for kicks and giggles
I really wish i could but I am so sorry to tell you that I am busy tonight ... going to be watching fox news.......lmao sorry I couldnt help it
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DCMomOf3 12:10 PM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by MARSTELAC:
who wants to meet up tonight for a beer? LOL! I don't drink beer, but I will for tonight, just for kicks and giggles
I'm supposed to be going out with my girls tonight to have a beer.... You are welcome to come too.
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SilverSabre25 01:19 PM 02-18-2011
This thread is hysterical!

I don't drink because I don't like the taste of alcohol but I don't begrudge any other adult their fun so long as it's responsible. A couple drinks on a Friday night are nothing. Even a couple drinks on a Monday night wouldn't bother me...
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MommyMuffin 01:27 PM 02-18-2011
I took the question to be from a provider asking parents.

And I agree, it should not matter.
If I brought my kids to daycare and the provider didnt drink on weekends I would wonder. j/k


Its my birthday next friday and I really wish I could have a bloody mary but I cant..boo..I'm pregnant..so I will have to wait until next year.
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daycare 01:32 PM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by MommyMuffin:
I took the question to be from a provider asking parents.

And I agree, it should not matter.
If I brought my kids to daycare and the provider didnt drink on weekends I would wonder. j/k


Its my birthday next friday and I really wish I could have a bloody mary but I cant..boo..I'm pregnant..so I will have to wait until next year.
I will have one for you.... now thats love!!! lol

congrats on the baby!!
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Live and Learn 02:51 PM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
It's Friday!! As soon as my door closes at 5:30pm, I am having a beer! I deserve it, and not one of my parents would think of saying otherwise.
Me too!
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MARSTELAC 02:54 PM 02-18-2011
Me as well! Let's all raise our glasses (mine is filled with wine) and have a "group" daycare toast! CHEERS!!!!!!!
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KEG123 04:31 PM 02-18-2011
I'll raise my glass of orange juice. No alcohol for this preggo either. (although MAN I wish I had some wine!!!)
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kendallina 05:01 PM 02-18-2011
I'm drinking wine right now! De-lish!

Happy Friday everyone!
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DCMomOf3 05:33 PM 02-18-2011
I didn't get to go out with the girls, family game night instead. I'm cracking open a bottle now though.
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momatheart 06:06 PM 02-18-2011
Originally Posted by melskids:
i think i'd be more upset if i found out she watches FOX news.



sorry i couldn't resist
OMG you all are so fun!

As a daycare person and a parent No way would I be upset. 2nd of all I have some of parents who's kids are in my care at my center and they invite me out to join them. infact I have before. So there! I do not think any less of them for working all week having their child in daycare and going out for a few drinks on the weekend. What am I supose to think humm what a bad mommy for working 40 hours and and going out on a saturday night instead of being with her child? NO WAY! Is she still a good mom HECK yeah!
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momatheart 06:07 PM 02-18-2011
OH YEAH CHEERS!!! !
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dEHmom 06:15 PM 02-18-2011
wow, lots of pregos around here!

Glad it's not me for once!!!!

Cheers! Captain and sprite!
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Kaddidle Care 04:24 PM 02-19-2011
Originally Posted by KEG123:
I'll raise my glass of orange juice. No alcohol for this preggo either. (although MAN I wish I had some wine!!!)
Aww - I remember those days. Fill a nice wine glass with some white grape juice and pretend it's the real thing. Enjoy and kudos to you for not drinking while pregnant!

(Also, if you use regular purple grape juice and put a bit of apple cidar vinigar in it it sort of tastes like wine. Being pregnant you may not be able to tolerate it but it's supposed to be good for lowering cholesteral for those of us that indulge in too much chocolate.)
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E Daycare 05:44 PM 02-19-2011
Man, its almost like some people dont think that providers are actual people. We arent specially molded to come out and only think about kids and coloring and play dough. We dont fold our hands into our laps when the doors close and sing songs while a angels plays the harp.

Im maid of honor in a wedding in a few weeks. One of my jobs is to plan a crazy bachelorette party. Its on a Saturday night, Ill be plenty ready to deal with kids come Monday. Not once did I think "Oh noes I watch other peoples children, I should just stay at home putting out new puzzles all weekend because if I go out and drink I must be some lush".

Now if I do end up going out and becoming a lush for the night and then show up at the dck homes all belligerent THEN maybe there will be a issue. Then again, with some days I have with other peoples children, these dcp could use a dose of lushed up dcp.

My life is not my work. I do it to pass the time and help my kid socialize. Im able to stay home and help with bills. Once my doors close, all the clothes come off, the rain falls from the ceiling and I ooga booga it down.

So on behalf of all the pregos here, I raise a glass and say OOGA BOOGA!
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QualiTcare 08:48 PM 02-20-2011
when childcare providers start getting paid more than mcdonald's employee's then MAYBE parents can have a say in if they drink or not!

when i was teaching, i ran into children (with their parents) while i was eating dinner and having a drink and it was no big deal. i wasn't into a "party scene" at that point - but if i was, it shouldn't matter!

to be honest, if parents had known what i have done in my past, they'd probably drop over dead.
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marniewon 09:56 PM 02-20-2011
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
to be honest, if parents had known what i have done in my past, they'd probably drop over dead.
I think many of us can say that!! I know I can.

Since the OP was unregistered, and we haven't heard a word from him/her, I'm thinking this is just a troll. Maybe just trying to stir things up. I hope he/she is having fun with this, especially since we are all pretty much in agreement that what we do on our own time is none of their business!!
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melskids 03:09 AM 02-21-2011
remember when we all thought teachers lived at school...lol


i went to catholic school, and the priest smoked right in front of us (outside, of course). he called it holy smoke. and we all knew it wasnt plain 7up in his flask.
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Unregistered 09:42 AM 02-21-2011
Unless a provider is getting her drink on during daycare hours and in front of the kids, then I would say that the parents need to mind their own business. Heck, even if the provider drinks a beer or 2 each and every night after all of the kids leave, it's still not the parents business unless it happens while the provider is on the clock.
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DCMomOf3 10:07 AM 02-21-2011
Originally Posted by E Daycare:
We dont fold our hands into our laps when the doors close and sing songs while a angels plays the harp.
What? We don't??
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dEHmom 04:24 AM 02-22-2011
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

I love this thread!

I fold my hands in my lap after dck's leave!

And I still believe teachers live at the school....don't they?
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Unregistered 06:09 PM 02-22-2011
This is hilarious! I'm laughing so hard I peeded in my pants!!!!!!
My dear hubby will have a nice, cold glass of wine poured & sitting on the cupboard for me almost everyday after my last child has left. After a day of screaming, poopy and hyper kids,you deserve a glass of something. It is no one's business what you do after their child has left your home. I can't believe someone really asked this question! What business is it of anyone to tell you how to live your life on your own time,so what if you go out with friends and have a good time and have a few drinks! That is your personal life! Now if the provider was drinking during the day while your child was there, that is another story, but not anyone's concern after they have left. I still can't believe that this was even brought up!
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Unregistered 08:38 PM 04-02-2011
I personally don't drink and feel uncomfortable around people who drink. This is due to some bad memories of adults drinking around me as a child and not liking who they turned into when they drank. Anyway a whole nother story but here is two stories of professionals and how it may make you think wow! My husband and I were having an early dinner out one evening (5:00 or so) during the week. We were in the restaurant but could see into the bar part and low and behold there sits the principal of my childs school. OK you say but its after school hours, no problem. Well child was still at childcare and needing picked up, does the childcare release the child to the parent or not-shes been drinking and will be driving. Also she was known to leave work early alot and this makes me think what was she doing when she left early. Most principles don't get to leave early. She is no longer at the school and actually moved out of state.

Second story-daycare provider calls parents and says "I can't work today-I'm not feeling well with this hangover I have." She drank on Sunday and couldn't work on Monday. One of her parents is in the childcare division offices. Clients did leave from this including the childcare division parent. DCP was is well known in our area but not well respected now.

"Remember your behavior in public, it can bring you down quick." We are no different than the Congressman, Pastor, Actor/Actress, etc. that make headlines when they screw up. We may not make the headlines but our name can become well known in our communities if we do something that seems inappropriate.

Also for the providers that may drink with daycare parents after hours at your house, do you allow those parents to also drive with those children after they have been drinking? Do the children see you drinking? Probably wouldn't look good if someone was hurt and then people found out that everyone had been drinking at a childcare providers home. Even after hours might not be good for business.
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cheerfuldom 09:06 AM 04-03-2011
We don't drink or have alcohol in the house ever. Thats just our personal conviction. However, it is not the parents rights to dictate what you do over the weekend and off daycare hours UNLESS it is directly affecting the service you provide (such as hangovers Monday morning). I do think there is something to be said in keeping up appearances though. I personally think it is very unprofessional to hang out with DC parents and drink and that sort of thing. As a parent myself, I would have a problem with it although others may not. I wouldn't advise discussing the party you went, your favorite mix and that sort of thing which can lead to parents feeling uncomfortable with what you do in your free time. No they don't have the right to say what you can and can't do but you actions do affect the way a person thinks about you.
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texascare 06:00 AM 04-04-2011
I can't believe this questin is up for discussion. Do our daycare parents go out and drink and meet their friends? Do our kids teachers, does my Orthopedic sugeon? Just because we are in the daycare profession does not mean we have to live like a nun! Seriously. This is just even crazy to bring up. I wonder what else we shouldn't be doing?
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dEHmom 07:34 AM 04-04-2011
Originally Posted by texascare:
I wonder what else we shouldn't be doing?
we shouldn't be swearing EVER
we shouldn't be having S.E.X
we shouldn't get pregnant because then it might raise some questions
we shouldn't pick our noses
we shouldn't wear bikinis

should I keep going?
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MsMe 09:59 AM 04-04-2011
Twice in the six years I have done daycare I have seen a DCP while out at a bar. Both times I have been terribley embarassed (and they were as well). I was not out having a wild and crazy time just a few drinks with friends. They made it VERY clear that it did not in anyway change their opinion of me (I was very upset they saw mw drinking) they also both made the comment that they hoped I didn't think poorly of them for leaving their kids while they went out (I don't have kids)

We are all human.....
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Unregistered 12:06 PM 04-04-2011
What I find so,so sad is that these children are away from their parents all week, then the parents feel they need a break in the evenings and go out. When do these children ever spend time with the parents. I guess if it was only once or twice a month it wouldn't be to bad but some parents do it every weekend. I feel so bad if I do something outside of the house because even though I'm home for and with my child its not just them. They are having to share my time with everyone else.
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marniewon 06:56 PM 04-04-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
What I find so,so sad is that these children are away from their parents all week, then the parents feel they need a break in the evenings and go out. When do these children ever spend time with the parents. I guess if it was only once or twice a month it wouldn't be to bad but some parents do it every weekend. I feel so bad if I do something outside of the house because even though I'm home for and with my child its not just them. They are having to share my time with everyone else.
When I was a young mom, my dh worked at a bar near our house. Many weekend nights I would meet him after his shift and we'd stay and listen to the band, do karaoke, etc. Every time this happened, my kids were in bed and sleeping long before the sitter came and I left. I don't see how that could, in any way, take time away from them.

In keeping with the theme of this thread, most people who spend time at bars don't go until later in the evening. Children should be in bed by the time most people going to bars would leave.

When I got re-married 9 years ago, during our pre-marital counseling, our pastor told us something that made a lot of sense. (We were combining families, each had 3 children, so it was a little different than two single, childless people coming together). Anyway, he told us to "put God first, each other second, and the family will fall into place". I tried my best to do that, and things were always well with our family when we did. All this to say, parents need "adult/alone" time to keep their marriage strong, and if that means getting a sitter for one night a month (or even one night a week!) then that's what they should do. Who are we to judge what goes on in their homes - we aren't there, we don't know.
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dEHmom 05:11 AM 04-05-2011
Originally Posted by marniewon:
All this to say, parents need "adult/alone" time to keep their marriage strong, and if that means getting a sitter for one night a month (or even one night a week!) then that's what they should do. Who are we to judge what goes on in their homes - we aren't there, we don't know.
yep! AMEN!

I am lucky, because my mom usually take all 3 of my kids approx once a month to 3 months (depending on how busy everyone is) for the weekend (usually 1 to 2 nights at a time).

We desperately need this (well I do more than hubs) because it is our time to reconnect. We usually do cleaning and major work (painting, home improvements, car repairs, etc) that we just cannot do with the kids home.

Even if parents chose to go to the bar, or to dinner/movie, etc every friday night, that is still 6 nights a week they are with their children. I believe some parents don't deserve to have kids and definitely do not spend enough time with them. It's not bad parenting to take 1 night a week for date night.
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Unregistered 10:18 AM 04-05-2011
What I find funny is how in the last 10-15 years parents need to have a date night. What did people do before this? I remember babysitting as a teenager but it wasn't the rage for parents to have "date nights". It seems like back then family time was valued also. Now everything is about "me" time.

Yes to the comment about if parents take one night for themselves then there are six others. True, if the parents aren't going those other six nights also. I have parents that have sport nights for themselves, going back to work after picking up little one, night out with the girls, the list could go on. Yes, also to the commenter about going to bed after the kids go to bed-I know of children that parents put to bed at 7:30 (older children 7+ years) So you spend 2 1/2 hours with your child out of 24 and then still need to go out.

I would personally like to keep mine up a little bit later, work on homework, read and just be together than worry about it I'm getting me time. I knew when I had children that it was for at least 18 years. If I was worried about myself I shouldn't have had children.
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jen2651 08:10 PM 04-05-2011
I am responding to the poster who said that parents need date nights...you certainly don't have to go out to do that. A few years ago (after our 1st son was born) both my husband and I were having a rough time. We both made a commitment that every Wednesday evening was our night. We never actually went anywhere for the most part, and if we did, we took our son. Now I know that seems contradicting but the biggest thing was we devoted that night to us. Sometimes we would go eat supper together (son was 4 months so still easy!) and then put baby to bed and play monopoly, or scrabble, or rent a movie, or have a beer. BUT, there was no interrupting our night. The only thing that got in the way of our nights was church during Easter!

I know it sounds dorky and super old lady, but this truly was what saved our relationship. There are times now that I whip out the Monopoly game and we both understand that we have been putting ourselves on the back burner. Things are much more hectic with a 3.5 year old and a 7 month old, but the Monopoly game does it every time!

I think it is important to have time, but sometimes it can be at home! After all, isn't that where all the fun happens anyway?!
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dEHmom 04:56 AM 04-06-2011
Originally Posted by jen2651:
I am responding to the poster who said that parents need date nights...you certainly don't have to go out to do that. A few years ago (after our 1st son was born) both my husband and I were having a rough time. We both made a commitment that every Wednesday evening was our night. We never actually went anywhere for the most part, and if we did, we took our son. Now I know that seems contradicting but the biggest thing was we devoted that night to us. Sometimes we would go eat supper together (son was 4 months so still easy!) and then put baby to bed and play monopoly, or scrabble, or rent a movie, or have a beer. BUT, there was no interrupting our night. The only thing that got in the way of our nights was church during Easter!

I know it sounds dorky and super old lady, but this truly was what saved our relationship. There are times now that I whip out the Monopoly game and we both understand that we have been putting ourselves on the back burner. Things are much more hectic with a 3.5 year old and a 7 month old, but the Monopoly game does it every time!

I think it is important to have time, but sometimes it can be at home! After all, isn't that where all the fun happens anyway?!

My dh and I don't have a lot of extra money to go out anywhere. So paying a babysitter, going for dinner and a movie just really doesn't happen. But for bday's or other presents family often gives us dinner gift cards, and movie vouchers etc. So hubs and I drop the kids off with the family member who gave it to us, and we go. That's like 1 or 2 times a year, lol! it's sad!

But we basically do everything as a family. We enjoy taking the kids for bike rides, walks, tobogganing, to play soccer in the field, etc. and it's all free!

For us it's more important to create the memories for our children, and to show them that family is the most important thing in the world.

But I still think a date night for mom and dad is necessary to keep the harmony. I don't think it has to mean going out anywhere. DH and I will often rent 2 movies, watch one with the kids, put them to bed, and then watch ours alone. or something like that.

When times get really rough (like they are now, where dh and I are ready to strangle each other), my mom usually takes them, and we have a weekend to bond together again. I am spoiled as I mentioned earlier, in that I have a mom who will take them. All the other grandparents are too old, and always have an excuse, and dh's mom who is younger than any other grandparent says she cannot handle all 3 kids at once! BS! she ran a daycare for 15 yrs, lol, and she can't handle 3 kids who dress themselves, go the the potty themselves (minus 1 who can't wipe his butt yet!), and they feed themselves, love to clean, etc. But that's ok, because we'd have to visit with her if she took the kids.
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JenNJ 08:04 AM 04-06-2011
EVERYONE needs me time! Parents included. I hardly consider working each day "me time" so I don't consider it that for my clients either. I think it is SOOOO important not to peg yourself as a mother/father ONLY and forget who you are a as person or as a couple. Everyone needs time to follow their interests, passions, and goals in life. Including parents!

My husband and I work a lot of hours combined. After my doors close for the night and H arrives home, we are all about the kids and family time. We eat dinner together as a family, we do a fun activity or a quick trip to the park with the dog, etc. Twice a month, my parents or my in-laws babysit my kids on a Friday or Saturday night so that my husband and I can go out and have fun as a couple. I hardly think that makes us selfish.

Happy parents = happy kids. Here is a study to prove it:
http://www.independent.co.uk/life-st...s-2263974.html

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normad 04:07 PM 04-15-2011
I understand your worry as a mother but honestly its nothing to worry about as long as your provider doesn't drink WHILE actually taking care of your child or getting drunk out in the streets being inappropriate and what not then that shouldn't be a problem. hey we all need some break every once in a while maybe its your provider's way of relaxing after a hard week's work, its Friday night anyways.
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