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Sweet pea 12:12 PM 10-09-2017
I have a 18mth old who I have had for 1yr now. She always waves bye bye to mum and gives kisses. This week mum hangs around and distracts her from playing and then dcg g screams and cries at her leaving. Mum text this morning to say it breaks her heart when she's like that. I replied that she needs to give her kisses whilst she's playing and make the drop off quicker. Is there any other tips I can use?? I'm at a loss as dcg is happy once mums out of sight. It's like a switch
Blackcat31 12:37 PM 10-09-2017
Originally Posted by Sweet pea:
I have a 18mth old who I have had for 1yr now. She always waves bye bye to mum and gives kisses. This week mum hangs around and distracts her from playing and then dcg g screams and cries at her leaving. Mum text this morning to say it breaks her heart when she's like that. I replied that she needs to give her kisses whilst she's playing and make the drop off quicker. Is there any other tips I can use?? I'm at a loss as dcg is happy once mums out of sight. It's like a switch
Ugh! That is so tough! What I do in those situations is tell the parent that they (both parent and the child) know you well enough now that if you need the parent during the day you will call and let them know but otherwise drop offs need to be short and sweet. I also tell "problematic" parents that linger until the child cries that if they do that (make a happy child cry) they must take the child back outside (car or wherever) and return again once the child has stopped crying. I have a 18mth old who I have had for 1yr now. She always waves bye bye to mum and gives kisses. This week mum hangs around and distracts her from playing and then dcg g screams and cries at her leaving. Mum text this morning to say it breaks her heart when she's like that. I replied that she needs to give her kisses whilst she's playing and make the drop off quicker. Is there any other tips I can use?? I'm at a loss as dcg is happy once mums out of sight. It's like a switch
NOT fair to you or the child to enter happy only to have mom purposely make her cry before departing.
Parents usually do that for their own satisfaction/attention.
This is usually how a parent sees it:
If the child cries = they miss/love/need parent
If child doesn't cry = they like DC provider more or don't miss parent.
Reassure mom things will be just fine.
If she makes child cry make mom deal with it.
Sweet pea 12:40 PM 10-09-2017
Yes, thank you.. I think she may be problematic like you say. I am going to see if she has listened to text and makes drop off quicker tomorrow but if not and she waits fir the dcg to cry then yes, she can take her back and bring her in happy again 😁
Mom2Two 02:23 PM 10-09-2017
I have a dcg who started at 14 mths with just a little bit of crying at drop off, but at 18 mths she went back to quite a lot of separation problems for maybe six weeks. I remembered from my ages and stages class that separation anxiety is pretty normal at 18 mths for many children.
I remembered it because I was confused in the class about why 8-10 months was an age for separation anxiety but then 18 months was also listed as an age for it. Now that I've seen it, I believe it!
I remembered it because I was confused in the class about why 8-10 months was an age for separation anxiety but then 18 months was also listed as an age for it. Now that I've seen it, I believe it!
Ariana 03:50 PM 10-09-2017
You may have to usher her out the door as well! I have had to do the whole “ok bye mom, see you soon” as I basically push her out the door. I always send a text apologizing for pushing them out but that prolonged good byes make calming her child harder for me. Basically the more worked up they are the worse it is to calm them.