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BGM 12:12 PM 04-11-2019
Sorry for any typos, but I just need to throw this up somewhere...

So,

I was contacted earlier this week by a mom who seemed like she needed care, like yesterday. She wanted to start the next day, but I require an interview, so I allowed her to come by way past closing, at around 7:30 pm. That's already unusual because I don't normally conduct business past 6:30, but I figured, hey, everyone needs a little help here and there.

So, she gets here a couple minutes late to the interview with her husband, no kids. The interview goes okay. They mentioned receiving help from the county to pay for daycare, which I do accept. Then they told me the time they would need care. Their oldest (7 yo boy) would need after care from 3:30-close (5:30); their youngest (4 yo boy) would need care all day on Monday, then Tues-Fri 7 am-11 and 3:30-5:30.

Now listen folks, my usual group doesn't come rolling in until 7:30-8, so I've gotten reeeaaaal used to taking my time and having a really relaxed morning, so I wasn't too excited about that, but those are the hours I advertise for, so sucks for me.

The older boy goes to school all day and the younger one goes to preschool for a half day. The parents said they had a system to transport them where they needed to go. I say okay! I ask them to read the policy before they enroll and fill out the paperwork to make sure this is a good fit and they guarantee that they will. I told her to read the policy like three times. She even made a joke about obviously it's really important to me to read the policy.

After the interview, I sent them a thank you email with a link to some paperwork and the policy handbook as well as instructions on how to pay (cash or check due upon drop off on their first day). I told her this in person as well. I also told them the amount that was due.

The night before they're supposed to come, the mom calls me...at 10:53 PM, just as we're dozing off to sleep to ask if I accept CashApp. I shortly tell her no and that I'm sleeping. My husband wakes up at 3:30 am to go to work. Usually when you get a call that late, it's something very important, so I answered. We were both pretty pissed.

Fast forward to the day they're supposed to come. They don't. She tells me they're going to start the next day instead at around 7:20. Fast forward to today. They're supposed to be here at 7 and the older boy is supposed to get picked up by a cab to take him to school at 7:40. I wake up early and get ready to greet them at 7. I have to poop at 6:59, but I hold it in. It's 7, 7:15, 7:30. I poop and then text the mom to see if they're coming. She texts oh, their dad is going to bring them. They should be there soon. The cab comes at 7:40. They get there around 8.

~~Things you can learn from reading the policy or the email I sent them are in italics~~

Dad hands over the paperwork and asks how much they need to pay. He only has the registration fee. Then, dad asks if can I get him something to eat because he didn't get a chance to take him to McDonald's this morning. I tell him snack is at 10 and he looks surprised and says, okay I'll come back to get him something. I love that he cares enough to come back to feed his kid, but outside food is not allowed.. I take into consideration it's his first day, so I say I'll feed him. We go in and I now have to stop everything we're doing to get everybody some cereal because it's only fair.
Mom calls. I answer, she refers to me as "young lady" and proceeds to ask about payment because the government is supposed to pay for them, so why does she have to pay me now? I tell her the money is due on the first day. The government payments are not set up yet, so she has to pay. She says okay and we hang up. Mom calls again and tells me her older son has a half day TODAY and will be coming right before nap time for the rest of the day.

There's more, but I'm tired of typing. Needless to say, these guys will not be here long.

I try to give everyone a chance, but I think I need to start turning people down

Would you guys give it another week? The mom wants to know if this will work by tomorrow instead of giving herself the 2 week trial period. I know they're still working out some kinks in their plan, but jeez!
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Vesta 12:23 PM 04-11-2019
She's giving you an easy out. I would take it.
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LostMyMarbles 12:27 PM 04-11-2019
Oh my gosh! I am dying laughing about you having to hold it in.

On a serious note, I wouldn’t keep that family. It sounds like they are going to continue to push the bar.And besides, we don’t want to interfere with your bathroom routine in the morning
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Ac114 12:36 PM 04-11-2019
That’s a hard pass for me! Glad they showed their true colors early on!
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happymom 12:50 PM 04-11-2019
Originally Posted by LostMyMarbles:
Oh my gosh! I am dying laughing about you having to hold it in.
Me too! Mom is definitely giving you an easy (quick) out, you don't even have to continue the trial period at this point!
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Rockgirl 12:52 PM 04-11-2019
No way! I would’ve turned them away at the door, since they didn’t have full payment.
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Blackcat31 12:58 PM 04-11-2019
If you had asked me if I'd consider keeping them 10 yrs ago, I would have absolutely kept them. Like you said, everyone needs some help/support now and then. I would have chalked all their chaos up to not really knowing how this whole daycare thing works....

But since you asked today... I would have told mom to just come get both kids right now as any parent that:

is just way too much drama, work and/or stress for my liking.

Since mom wants to know by end of day if they will be able to stay permanently I'd say NO.
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sharlan 01:16 PM 04-11-2019
Nope, Nope, Nope!

There is no way I would be responsible for a 7 yo child being picked up and dropped off by a cab. I see too many possible scenarios there.

Like BC says, i would have taken that family years ago, not today.
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LostMyMarbles 01:27 PM 04-11-2019
About the cab....I don’t live in a big city. Is calling a cab for your child to go to school common practice in your area?
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Meeko 01:39 PM 04-11-2019
The cab thing is terrifying! They want you to hand over their small child to a complete stranger and just wave goodbye?....on a regular basis??????
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Mom2Two 02:01 PM 04-11-2019
Originally Posted by BGM:
Sorry for any typos, but I just need to throw this up somewhere...

So,

I was contacted earlier this week by a mom who seemed like she needed care, like yesterday. She wanted to start the next day, but I require an interview, so I allowed her to come by way past closing, at around 7:30 pm. That's already unusual because I don't normally conduct business past 6:30, but I figured, hey, everyone needs a little help here and there.

So, she gets here a couple minutes late to the interview with her husband, no kids. The interview goes okay. They mentioned receiving help from the county to pay for daycare, which I do accept. Then they told me the time they would need care. Their oldest (7 yo boy) would need after care from 3:30-close (5:30); their youngest (4 yo boy) would need care all day on Monday, then Tues-Fri 7 am-11 and 3:30-5:30.

Now listen folks, my usual group doesn't come rolling in until 7:30-8, so I've gotten reeeaaaal used to taking my time and having a really relaxed morning, so I wasn't too excited about that, but those are the hours I advertise for, so sucks for me.

The older boy goes to school all day and the younger one goes to preschool for a half day. The parents said they had a system to transport them where they needed to go. I say okay! I ask them to read the policy before they enroll and fill out the paperwork to make sure this is a good fit and they guarantee that they will. I told her to read the policy like three times. She even made a joke about obviously it's really important to me to read the policy.

After the interview, I sent them a thank you email with a link to some paperwork and the policy handbook as well as instructions on how to pay (cash or check due upon drop off on their first day). I told her this in person as well. I also told them the amount that was due.

The night before they're supposed to come, the mom calls me...at 10:53 PM, just as we're dozing off to sleep to ask if I accept CashApp. I shortly tell her no and that I'm sleeping. My husband wakes up at 3:30 am to go to work. Usually when you get a call that late, it's something very important, so I answered. We were both pretty pissed.

Fast forward to the day they're supposed to come. They don't. She tells me they're going to start the next day instead at around 7:20. Fast forward to today. They're supposed to be here at 7 and the older boy is supposed to get picked up by a cab to take him to school at 7:40. I wake up early and get ready to greet them at 7. I have to poop at 6:59, but I hold it in. It's 7, 7:15, 7:30. I poop and then text the mom to see if they're coming. She texts oh, their dad is going to bring them. They should be there soon. The cab comes at 7:40. They get there around 8.

~~Things you can learn from reading the policy or the email I sent them are in italics~~

Dad hands over the paperwork and asks how much they need to pay. He only has the registration fee. Then, dad asks if can I get him something to eat because he didn't get a chance to take him to McDonald's this morning. I tell him snack is at 10 and he looks surprised and says, okay I'll come back to get him something. I love that he cares enough to come back to feed his kid, but outside food is not allowed.. I take into consideration it's his first day, so I say I'll feed him. We go in and I now have to stop everything we're doing to get everybody some cereal because it's only fair.
Mom calls. I answer, she refers to me as "young lady" and proceeds to ask about payment because the government is supposed to pay for them, so why does she have to pay me now? I tell her the money is due on the first day. The government payments are not set up yet, so she has to pay. She says okay and we hang up. Mom calls again and tells me her older son has a half day TODAY and will be coming right before nap time for the rest of the day.

There's more, but I'm tired of typing. Needless to say, these guys will not be here long.

I try to give everyone a chance, but I think I need to start turning people down

Would you guys give it another week? The mom wants to know if this will work by tomorrow instead of giving herself the 2 week trial period. I know they're still working out some kinks in their plan, but jeez!


I so feel your pain, but thank you for sharing. That. was. so. funny.

I about lost it at the part about McDonalds. So funny.

And how do they afford a cab? Are they paying for preschool or is it free in your state? Doing basic common core 3 Rs is so easy with 4 yo kids that I wonder why anyone pays for preschool when the child is already in a good daycare environment.

I have been in your shoes a few times, and I know now that I do need to get a lot pickier about who I accept. I also need to get back into having a trial period.
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Rockgirl 02:04 PM 04-11-2019
The cab part freaked me out, too!
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e.j. 02:10 PM 04-11-2019
Originally Posted by BGM:
The mom wants to know if this will work by tomorrow instead of giving herself the 2 week trial period.
I doubt if this situation is going to get any better. She's make it very easy to say, "I really don't think this is going to work out." I think I'd jump at the chance.
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284878 03:13 PM 04-11-2019
Originally Posted by sharlan:
Nope, Nope, Nope!

There is no way I would be responsible for a 7 yo child being picked up and dropped off by a cab. I see too many possible scenarios there.

Like BC says, i would have taken that family years ago, not today.
No cab here either. I had a sibling group when I was fostering. Two went one school by bus to one school in one direction and another one went to another school but that school wouldn't supply a bus, they were going to send a cab. At first I thought they were joking but found that the weren't. I refused to let a cab take any child any where. We eventually came to an agreement to have a case worker drive her there and they paid my sister to bring her home. I couldn't drive her as I had to be home when the bus came.
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storybookending 08:48 PM 04-11-2019
Aren’t 7 year olds still in car seats these days? It was 8 and 80 lbs last I checked. Is that just waived in a cab? Oh heck no.
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Msdunny 04:44 AM 04-12-2019
I worked for the public school system before re-opening this year, and cabs are contracted to transport some students - usually those who either have special needs or who have been deemed 'homeless' and have moved out of their school's area, but they are provided transportation to continue at the school and not have more disruption in their lives. (not that either applies here, but they are the common reasons for a cab.) The driver is consistent, so is like a bus picking up every day.

That said, I don't give up my time lightly, and would already be over waiting for someone to show up. If you tell me you need me at 7, you'd better be here at 7, KWIM? I think this family would be a hard pass for me.

Edited to add: If she called me 'young lady', I might just ask for pick up right then. That just doesn't hit me well. It seems very condesending.
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BGM 04:53 AM 04-12-2019
Yeah...you all gave awesome points. It's almost comical how much of a mess this is.

I woke up this morning feeling wishy-washy about terming and my husband was like, "You should read your post on the forum again."

I'm going to let whoever picks the kids up today know this will be their last day.
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Ariana 05:37 AM 04-12-2019
Oh my goodness Those poor kids, this sounds like total chaos! Reminds me of my sister in law having to send her 5 year old on a City bus to get to daycare

As for not reading policies that is just par for the course in my experience! Most people do not take our jobs seriously enough to read a policy book. I have posted menus and still had parents ask me what we had for lunch

The only way I would go forward is if I had a very confrontational face to face conversation with them letting them know you are *this close* to letting them go if they don’t get their act together. Once parents know you mean business and realize they need YOU more than you need THEM they shape up
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BGM 06:55 AM 04-12-2019
After the mess of a day yesterday, I was once again expecting them to come today at seven. By 8, I texted mom and dad to see if they were coming:

Me:Good morning,
Are the boys coming today?

Dad: No there not.

Me:Okay, thanks for letting me know.
Unfortunately, I will not be able to take care of the kids from here on out. I will email you a receipt for yesterday's tuition.

Dad: Okay

The End...Hopefully.

I guess I'm glad we didn't have some kind of huge confrontation, but it's kind of like studying all night for a test that the teacher decides not to have the next day.
Oh well.
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Blackcat31 07:00 AM 04-12-2019
Yikes... I wonder what in the world....

Sounds like they have a super chaotic lifestyle and you just don't need to invite that into your life...

Their monkeys, their circus!

Glad you are done with all that!
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mommyneedsadayoff 07:40 AM 04-12-2019
Yowza! What a hot mess! The cab thing would be a definite no for me, but so would all of the other issues. I doubt you will see any money, but not having to deal with them anymore would be payment enough for me!
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happymom 08:28 AM 04-12-2019
Originally Posted by BGM:
I guess I'm glad we didn't have some kind of huge confrontation, but it's kind of like studying all night for a test that the teacher decides not to have the next day.
Oh well.
That's EXACTLY what it is like!! How anti-climactic! I'm sure they saw it coming...

I'm glad it worked out

Poor kiddos though!
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Ariana 08:55 AM 04-12-2019
Wait until mom finds out!!! Hopefully she is as equally apathetic
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Laugh and Learn 09:48 AM 04-12-2019
Glad it worked out. And you didn’t have to worry about the confrontation. Sounded like that family was going to be way too much to deal with!
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Gemma 10:02 AM 04-12-2019
Glad they moved on before the situation got any uglier.
Now...got any other stories to tell us?
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sharlan 10:07 AM 04-12-2019
I think you dodged a lot of mental exhaustion with that one.
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DaveA 10:08 AM 04-12-2019
Glad they’re out of your hair. Don’t be surprised if you get a call from DCM either mad at you or begging for a few days they “really need” care for.
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BGM 05:20 PM 04-12-2019
Originally Posted by Gemma:
Glad they moved on before the situation got any uglier.
Now...got any other stories to tell us?
If I think of any more, I'll let you know
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Josiegirl 03:29 AM 04-13-2019
Sounds like a parent who it's all about them. Or maybe she needed care to cover a providers' unexpected time off? Also sounds aggravating. Glad it's over for you.
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Mom2Two 11:56 AM 04-15-2019
Originally Posted by BGM:
my husband was like, "You should read your post on the forum again."


Originally Posted by Ariana:
Wait until mom finds out!!! Hopefully she is as equally apathetic


Originally Posted by sharlan:
I think you dodged a lot of mental exhaustion with that one.


Originally Posted by Gemma:
Glad they moved on before the situation got any uglier.
Now...got any other stories to tell us?

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Mom2Two 11:57 AM 04-15-2019
Yeah...the taxi...the odd communications... Some people just seem to register high on the "creep me out" meter.
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Tags:blackcat, chaotic, crazy, parents - changing things, parents - don't communicate, red flag
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