Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Teaching Kindness
Josiegirl 02:27 AM 02-23-2017
Nice topic for a training I attended last night. But my question is this-is it possible to teach kindness to a 2 yo? 3 and 4's may grasp some of the ideas but can a 2 yo who hits or pulls hair for the attention of another? I would LOVE to teach the 2 yos in my care but I've been trying and trying. They're just not 'getting it'. But of course they're thriving on the drama of the 3 yo's reaction because she's their main target.
Reply
Cat Herder 05:34 AM 02-23-2017
* We teach kindness and empathy by modeling the behaviors we want to see. >unicorn dust and butterfly's<

At my training I was told that is why we can't punish, anymore. We discipline using kindness, empathy and patience.

"Oh, Timmy. I see you really want to yank hair and like to hear them yell. Pull this ribbon tied to a fence post and sound this air-horn, instead. I think you may like it as much."

Or something like that, I was pretty hungry and the class ran long.

There is truth in there, somewhere. We just need to use some common sense with the adaptations and discipline plans we implement, I think.
Reply
Blackcat31 05:47 AM 02-23-2017
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
* We teach kindness and empathy by modeling the behaviors we want to see. >unicorn dust and butterfly's<

At my training I was told that is why we can't punish, anymore. We discipline using kindness, empathy and patience.

"Oh, Timmy. I see you really want to yank hair and like to hear them yell. Pull this ribbon tied to a fence post and sound this air-horn, instead. I think you may like it as much."

Or something like that, I was pretty hungry and the class ran long.

There is truth in there, somewhere. We just need to use some common sense with the adaptations and discipline plans we implement, I think.
That's because cake doesn't really fill you up!

I totally agree that we role model and teach these types of things by example. I don't think it's a concrete thing we can see or measure for each child like sitting up or learning to talk but it's something we see over time.

I do think it's part of discipline and guidance but it's also part of playing with friends, circle time, lunch time and every other activity we participate in.
Reply
Cat Herder 05:59 AM 02-23-2017
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
That's because cake doesn't really fill you up!

I totally agree that we role model and teach these types of things by example. I don't think it's a concrete thing we can see or measure for each child like sitting up or learning to talk but it's something we see over time.

I do think it's part of discipline and guidance but it's also part of playing with friends, circle time, lunch time and every other activity we participate in.
True, true.... but boy was it fulfilling. Who can resist warm, fresh chocolate pound cake from the farmers market, anyway. Life is short, eat the cake.

** Just this morning I saw my 18 month old DCG hand a 22 month old DCB a toy he dropped when he tripped. As she walked past him to the bookshelf she ran her hand through his hair, wiping it back from his eyes the exact way I do. They do pick it up.....
Reply
daycare 06:15 AM 02-23-2017
I think any child of any age can pick it up. If only YOU provide the opportunities for them to learn.

Think of it like this. A child at 10-12months wants something to drink. The have no vocabulary yet to tell you with their words. So the infant goes and finds a cup, takes your hand and walks you over to the fridge, hands you their empty cup.

You know they want something to drink and they didn't say a word. They learned this by watching you, us, parents.
It's amazing that they watch every little thing we do.
Reply
daycarediva 10:45 AM 02-23-2017
Modeling. YES! I have had amazingly kind toddlers. I have a dcb, now 2, that would pat friends backs, offer hugs, go get his rest time blanket to comfort a child, etc. All things *I* do with/for them.

I model and speak for the ones with limited speech.

"OUCH! It hurts when you X, it makes me sad to see Susie hurt. You want to play with Susie? I can tell, she's a nice friend to play with. Susie, can we play with you? That's so nice. I feel happy when my friends play gently with me. Do you feel happy?"

repeat, over and over and over.
Reply
Ariana 04:01 PM 02-23-2017
Model and catch them when they ARE kind and really emphasize it. I have a small dog who gets mauled by the kids. Some kids are just rough and violent with him but I show them how to be gentle, hand over hand, and then really priase when they are being gentle. "Wow johnny I really like how you are touching his fur lightly right now, give me five for being gentle with the doggy". Or showing them the consequences of their actions "well the doggy doesn't like to be chased so he went away from the playroom and you can't play with him now". Soon the kids will show you they are being gentle because they enjoy the praise. Even if they are doing it for praise at first it becomes a way of being after that because I will remind them that the nicer they are the more the dog will hang around. I think this is very transferrable to other people as well.
Reply
Josiegirl 10:15 AM 02-24-2017
One of our spur of the moment activities this a.m. involved using cotton balls and sandpaper. The 3 yos totally got it but the 2 yos are off in their own little world.
Cotton balls=soft words, kind actions, etc. that feel nice, can help and don't hurt.
Sandpaper=rough, scratchy and hard actions/words that can hurt and make us sad.
I also read Should I Share My Ice Cream? by Mo Willems and Giraffes Can't Dance by Giles Andrae(I probably goofed his name up). Then we spent all of lunch time talking about those books.

I just need to keep this at the forefront of our mornings to start off on the right foot and keep our day straight and narrow, Instead of opening my door in the morning with an anticipation of more hitting, more pushing, egad, is it Friday yet, Calgon take me away NOW type of attitude.

Lord please grant me more patience every day. Wait. Make that every second.
Reply
Tags:discipline - positive
Reply Up