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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Forced Vomiting, Ugh!!
daycare 08:11 AM 10-24-2012
I have a few DCK who are forcing themselves to vomit so that they don't have to eat at meal time.

I am so baffled by this and not too sure what to do. I have talked to all of the parents, but of course, they are all claiming this is only an issue here. Wait, actually one said DCK does it at home too.

So it started with only one kid doing it. I call him Mac Donalds Mike, because this is all that the kid will eat. I am on the food program and of course all I serve here is healthy foods. No junk of any kind.

Well Now that MAC MIKE is doing it, two other kids have joined him. As soon as I tell them it is time to eat and set them at the table, it's barf time. Yup! It starts with one and within 15 minutes 2-3 more kids have either tried to vomit or have. It's spreading like a wildfire and I don't know what to do to stop it.

I am so sick of cleaning puke off my floor every day! btw. it happens with each child at least one time a day, not at every meal. Other meals they will just scream and cry.

I also do not send home after one episode of vomiting. Maybe I should, but do you think that this is even something that the parents can make them stop doing??
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Blackcat31 08:30 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
I also do not send home after one episode of vomiting. Maybe I should, but do you think that this is even something that the parents can make them stop doing??
I would send home for ANY vomiting. No matter the cause.

Is it something a parent can stop making them do? Absolutely the parent can talk to their child and let them know they need to stop.

I would consider having a sit down meeting with the parents AND child and let them know EXACTLY how meal time goes at your house. Let them know the child needs to have the food offered to them but they can choose not to eat. I don't know if you have your kiddos stay seated until everyone is done or if they can get up if they don't want to eat, but I would talk with parents about it and they can talk with their child.

I think this would work for you because you only take preschool age children and they are perfectly capable of understanding the self-induced vomiting is NOT going to solve their issue for them.
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daycare 08:52 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I would send home for ANY vomiting. No matter the cause.

Is it something a parent can stop making them do? Absolutely the parent can talk to their child and let them know they need to stop.

I would consider having a sit down meeting with the parents AND child and let them know EXACTLY how meal time goes at your house. Let them know the child needs to have the food offered to them but they can choose not to eat. I don't know if you have your kiddos stay seated until everyone is done or if they can get up if they don't want to eat, but I would talk with parents about it and they can talk with their child.

I think this would work for you because you only take preschool age children and they are perfectly capable of understanding the self-induced vomiting is NOT going to solve their issue for them.
so the kids that are doing it are all 2. I think 2 of them are very aware of what they are doing and the other 2 do not.

Do you send home for only one vomit episode??
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Blackcat31 08:59 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
so the kids that are doing it are all 2. I think 2 of them are very aware of what they are doing and the other 2 do not.

Do you send home for only one vomit episode??
Yep. I don't do ANY kind of vomit.

I just can't.

The other end, I can deal with. Hate but can deal with. Vomit, I can NOT.

Once = bye bye.
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Meeko 09:06 AM 10-24-2012
Calling their parents to pick up may make it worse, as most kids would love going home early with Mom and Dad.

I would get the parents on board with this plan.......call the parents to let them know it happened again, but don't have them pick up. That way you cover yourself if the child says they threw up and the parent is upset you didn't let them know.

Every time they do it, they get to lie down for the rest of the day because they're "sick". No crafts, no music time....just lay still and do nothing.

As they protest and say they're not sick, remind them that they vomited, so they must be ill and therefore need to rest.

I think the novelty of vomiting and the associated chaos will soon wear off.
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littlemissmuffet 09:10 AM 10-24-2012
I send home after two espisodes. However, I would be letting the parents know TODAY that if this keeps ups (i.e. happens again tomorow) the child WILL be sent home after doing it once. This is a disgusting behvaiour and I wouldn't have anything to do with it. Mac Mike being the instigator would be put on a 2 week probationary period - if the behvaiour doesn't cease, termination would result.
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MamaBearCanada 09:10 AM 10-24-2012
The two that aren't aware might be doing it because their gag reflex is triggered by the sound/smell of the others doing it. I know if I hear/smell vomit I start too so they may not be at fault... Just something to consider when you address it with parents. It's not fair to be upset with them if it's out of their control. Could you get the ringleader picked up before lunch & see if you can regroup the others then just deal with Mike later? I would get kids picked up for even 1 episode.
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littlemissmuffet 09:12 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Meeko:
Calling their parents to pick up may make it worse, as most kids would love going home early with Mom and Dad.

I would get the parents on board with this plan.......call the parents to let them know it happened again, but don't have them pick up. That way you cover yourself if the child says they threw up and the parent is upset you didn't let them know.

Every time they do it, they get to lie down for the rest of the day because they're "sick". No crafts, no music time....just lay still and do nothing.

As they protest and say they're not sick, remind them that they vomited, so they must be ill and therefore need to rest.

I think the novelty of vomiting and the associated chaos will soon wear off.
I like this plan. Alot.

But I do disagree with the sending home w/ mom and dad will make the problem worse. Most parents would be livid having to continually leave work to pick up and tend to a child that is not even sick... and the kids are going to pick up on this and realize that they're not spedning quality time w/ mom or dad so it was better being at daycare!
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daycare 09:13 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Meeko:
Calling their parents to pick up may make it worse, as most kids would love going home early with Mom and Dad.

I would get the parents on board with this plan.......call the parents to let them know it happened again, but don't have them pick up. That way you cover yourself if the child says they threw up and the parent is upset you didn't let them know.

Every time they do it, they get to lie down for the rest of the day because they're "sick". No crafts, no music time....just lay still and do nothing.

As they protest and say they're not sick, remind them that they vomited, so they must be ill and therefore need to rest.

I think the novelty of vomiting and the associated chaos will soon wear off.
this is a very good point, and one that I did not think about... You are right in saying that sending them home would be a reward.

I do like your plan of action, the only thing that I may have to think through, is that if I tell them they are ill and other children hear this, then they will go home and say mom macdonald mike was at daycare sick today..

I think that the parents would be either calling me to ask why I had an ill child here or would think that they can send their ill child here.

I have all preschoolers, so they talk non-stop. no such thing as confidently here at all when it comes to the kids doing things.
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Blackcat31 09:20 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
I like this plan. Alot.

But I do disagree with the sending home w/ mom and dad will make the problem worse. Most parents would be livid having to continually leave work to pick up and tend to a child that is not even sick... and the kids are going to pick up on this and realize that they're not spedning quality time w/ mom or dad so it was better being at daycare!
I like Meekos plan too but I would still be tempted to send home. It isn't MY problem that the child has such poor eating habits that I should have to deal with it. I honestly don't care if the child starts relating throwing up to being able to go home because eventually the parent will have to correct or address the issue and the issue is more than likely caused by them in the first place by not setting up healthy eating habits at home.

If it starts because of behavior at home, then the behavior can be dealt with at home.

Ask me this same questions 10 years ago and I would probably have had a different answer but I am so beyond fixing issues parents create.
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daycare 09:24 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by MamaBearCanada:
The two that aren't aware might be doing it because their gag reflex is triggered by the sound/smell of the others doing it. I know if I hear/smell vomit I start too so they may not be at fault... Just something to consider when you address it with parents. It's not fair to be upset with them if it's out of their control. Could you get the ringleader picked up before lunch & see if you can regroup the others then just deal with Mike later? I would get kids picked up for even 1 episode.
the thing is, even though mac donald mike is the instigator of starting it, he's more like the teacher of it.. sometimes the other kids will be the first ones to do it on a particular day. So while it could be the case when several do it at one meal, but it is different kids doing it at different meals.

Its like they all take turns..sooo frustrating...
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Zoe 09:33 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
the thing is, even though mac donald mike is the instigator of starting it, he's more like the teacher of it.. sometimes the other kids will be the first ones to do it on a particular day. So while it could be the case when several do it at one meal, but it is different kids doing it at different meals.

Its like they all take turns..sooo frustrating...
I think no matter what you do you write a letter or verbally tell all of the parents of your new plan so that there's no confusion if jr. comes home and tells their parents of what you did. They will understand that you are trying to solve the problem and not allowing "sick" kids at your daycare.
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countrymom 09:45 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Yep. I don't do ANY kind of vomit.

I just can't.

The other end, I can deal with. Hate but can deal with. Vomit, I can NOT.

Once = bye bye.
me either, I even bought a rug shampooer but it doesn't help.
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countrymom 09:50 AM 10-24-2012
their actions need consequences.
you can get the kids to assist you in cleaning it up, there is nothing wrong when puking is done on purpose.

you can send them to the naughty corner, because thats bad manners and you don't need to put up with it.

don't send them to play, its a reward, calling home is a reward. You need to do something that is a hard consequence.

and micki d's mike, gets to sit at the table wether he eats or not.
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rhymia1 09:56 AM 10-24-2012
Ugh. I had to let kids go because they would sit and gag at the table rather than eat. I remember thinking "God, please throw up!" so I could send them home. They never did

I also agree about sending them home every single time. My own child was a frequent flier at the school nurse until I nipped it in the bud. But you would need the parents on board.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 10:26 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Meeko:
Calling their parents to pick up may make it worse, as most kids would love going home early with Mom and Dad.

I would get the parents on board with this plan.......call the parents to let them know it happened again, but don't have them pick up. That way you cover yourself if the child says they threw up and the parent is upset you didn't let them know.

Every time they do it, they get to lie down for the rest of the day because they're "sick". No crafts, no music time....just lay still and do nothing.

As they protest and say they're not sick, remind them that they vomited, so they must be ill and therefore need to rest.

I think the novelty of vomiting and the associated chaos will soon wear off.
I like it.


We had one that used to look at the food and start gagging. If he started gagging he would throw up. We would look him directly in the eyes and tell him, "Stop. You are fine." in a very firm voice. It did and he now will eat just about anything. Praise the Lord because the throwing up icked me out.
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makap 11:43 AM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Meeko:
Calling their parents to pick up may make it worse, as most kids would love going home early with Mom and Dad.

I would get the parents on board with this plan.......call the parents to let them know it happened again, but don't have them pick up. That way you cover yourself if the child says they threw up and the parent is upset you didn't let them know.

Every time they do it, they get to lie down for the rest of the day because they're "sick". No crafts, no music time....just lay still and do nothing.

As they protest and say they're not sick, remind them that they vomited, so they must be ill and therefore need to rest.

I think the novelty of vomiting and the associated chaos will soon wear off.


I had a 3 year old who used to do this and this is exactly how I handled it. it worked!
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clep 12:29 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Meeko:
Calling their parents to pick up may make it worse, as most kids would love going home early with Mom and Dad.

I would get the parents on board with this plan.......call the parents to let them know it happened again, but don't have them pick up. That way you cover yourself if the child says they threw up and the parent is upset you didn't let them know.

Every time they do it, they get to lie down for the rest of the day because they're "sick". No crafts, no music time....just lay still and do nothing.

As they protest and say they're not sick, remind them that they vomited, so they must be ill and therefore need to rest.

I think the novelty of vomiting and the associated chaos will soon wear off.
Yup, I have done this in the past and it worked perfectly. Also, if I have a child that has gone for a week without eating anything here, I will implement the sick theory. Since they are unwilling to even try their food, they must be sick and I will put them on a cot. Of course if they start feeling better, and feeling hungry, their food is waiting for them. Then I just ignore them and have the children do one of their favorite activities. They start eating very well and soon.
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daycare 12:44 PM 10-24-2012
So I just took video of DCK#2 screaming at the top of their lungs, then forcing themselves to vomit at lunch time.

All of the other dck sat with their hands over their ears and one was crying with hands over ears. I sent it to the DCD and said come get your child.

Boy is DCD mad...He is on his way now, so curios to hear what he has to say....
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SunshineMama 12:50 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
So I just took video of DCK#2 screaming at the top of their lungs, then forcing themselves to vomit at lunch time.

All of the other dck sat with their hands over their ears and one was crying with hands over ears. I sent it to the DCD and said come get your child.

Boy is DCD mad...He is on his way now, so curios to hear what he has to say....
OMG I cannot believe that this is something that you have to go through! I don't handle throw up. One and done. If you are going to keep the kid that started all of this then I love the idea of telling them that they must be sick and need to go and lay down. Then I would walk them right up to bed. I am SO sorry that is going on for you right now! I cant wait to hear what dcd has to say!
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Country Kids 12:54 PM 10-24-2012
Please keep us updated on what dcd has to say! I'm so curious that if I was a cat it would kill me-
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clep 12:56 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
Please keep us updated on what dcd has to say! I'm so curious that if I was a cat it would kill me-
Yup me too. Can't wait to hear how this turns out.
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daycare 01:07 PM 10-24-2012
Oh wow.....

so DCD shows up and says he is very sorry. He tells me that this has been an issue at home and that mom is the blame. he completely throws his wife under the bus, but i am happy he did.

He told me that ever since he started working nights that DCM will give into him not eating the dinner that dcd cooked and instead will give him fruit roll-up or fruit snacks, or whatever dck wants to eat just so she does not have to deal with DCK. Yeah way to go mom....NOT

He told me that DCK went to grandparents over the weekend to his moms house and that she called him 4 times about the eating issues. So he said he was aware that it is an issue.

So dcd said I don't mean to put you in the middle of this, I will take him home today and see that he eats and follows all of your table rules, but next time, mom needs to come and pick him up, please be sure to call her. He then told me better yet, isn't it in your policy that they can't come back for 24 hours after they vomit?? I said yes, but I know he's not sick. So DCD says well I think he needs to stay home so that mommy can miss her girls day out tomorrow and have to deal with the monster that she created.............high 5 DCD..

So DCK is not coming back tomorrow and mommy gets to deal with it. I am so thankful that I have a DCD that has some sense of logic. I just hope that they don't start arguing in front of DCK.......CUZ DCD was pissed
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Country Kids 01:11 PM 10-24-2012
Go DCD-

That makes me so excited for you that you have such an awesome awesome dad likes this and one that knows/follows your policies.
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daycare 01:20 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
Go DCD-

That makes me so excited for you that you have such an awesome awesome dad likes this and one that knows/follows your policies.
yeah I was a little shocked , but super happy....I was laughing deep down inside that he's being so sneaky like this.
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SunshineMama 01:24 PM 10-24-2012
DCD is awesome wow!!! I love it!
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Blackcat31 01:30 PM 10-24-2012
See? An issue created at home needs to be addressed at home.

Totally NOT cool to make it your problem..... I still stand by my send them home advice. I would use an alternate method of dealing with the situation IF it was started and reinforced at home and had this been an illness type throw up incident.

This is a behavioral issue.

Nice to see that DCD and DCM will HAVE to fix this together, and that DCD was understanding of the position this type of behavior puts you in
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daycare 01:36 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
See? An issue created at home needs to be addressed at home.

Totally NOT cool to make it your problem..... I still stand by my send them home advice. I would use an alternate method of dealing with the situation IF it was started and reinforced at home and had this been an illness type throw up incident.

This is a behavioral issue.

Nice to see that DCD and DCM will HAVE to fix this together, and that DCD was understanding of the position this type of behavior puts you in
very true BC......lol dcd just sent me a text and said......

don't tell dcm that I was the one that said he can't come back for 24 hours, I don't want to sleep on the sofa tonight, my back already hurts.......lol

I said no worries, it is policy afterall..
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e.j. 02:58 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by EntropyControlSpecialist:
We had one that used to look at the food and start gagging. If he started gagging he would throw up. We would look him directly in the eyes and tell him, "Stop. You are fine." in a very firm voice. It did and he now will eat just about anything. Praise the Lord because the throwing up icked me out.
Before I moved to where I live now, I had a neighbor who also did day care. I ended up watching her behaviorally challenged nephew one day when her day care was closed. She asked me what I was serving for lunch and when I told her, she said, "Oh, he doesn't like that. Every time I serve it, he makes himself vomit." Sure enough, once I started handing the kids their plates and he saw what we were having for lunch, he started to make himself gag and vomit. I looked him right in the eye and in my quietest, firmest voice said, "Don't. You. Dare!" He was caught off guard and stopped immediately. He ate his lunch and I never had a problem with him again.

Originally Posted by daycare:
very true BC......lol dcd just sent me a text and said......

don't tell dcm that I was the one that said he can't come back for 24 hours, I don't want to sleep on the sofa tonight, my back already hurts.......lol

I said no worries, it is policy afterall..
You have to love this DCD! Too bad he can't be cloned.
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countrymom 06:45 PM 10-24-2012
Originally Posted by daycare:
Oh wow.....

so DCD shows up and says he is very sorry. He tells me that this has been an issue at home and that mom is the blame. he completely throws his wife under the bus, but i am happy he did.

He told me that ever since he started working nights that DCM will give into him not eating the dinner that dcd cooked and instead will give him fruit roll-up or fruit snacks, or whatever dck wants to eat just so she does not have to deal with DCK. Yeah way to go mom....NOT

He told me that DCK went to grandparents over the weekend to his moms house and that she called him 4 times about the eating issues. So he said he was aware that it is an issue.

So dcd said I don't mean to put you in the middle of this, I will take him home today and see that he eats and follows all of your table rules, but next time, mom needs to come and pick him up, please be sure to call her. He then told me better yet, isn't it in your policy that they can't come back for 24 hours after they vomit?? I said yes, but I know he's not sick. So DCD says well I think he needs to stay home so that mommy can miss her girls day out tomorrow and have to deal with the monster that she created.............high 5 DCD..

So DCK is not coming back tomorrow and mommy gets to deal with it. I am so thankful that I have a DCD that has some sense of logic. I just hope that they don't start arguing in front of DCK.......CUZ DCD was pissed
omg that is the bestest dcd in the whole wide world. Good for him, I want to give him a hug!
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littlemissmuffet 09:16 PM 10-24-2012
I am really pleased that this DCD was so honest with you, acknowledges there is a problem and also wants to help put an end to it. That's wonderful. I hope with all the advice from here and mom/dad working with you this issue will be solved in no time... and you can move on to the next
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nanglgrl 11:19 PM 10-24-2012
This dad gives me hope for the future. . Go dad!
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canadiancare 06:14 AM 10-25-2012
I have one kid who *crosses fingers* seems to have outgrown this. She is 2, extremely underweight and fed at home whatever she wants (even pizza for breakfast) although it isn't truly pizza since she doesn't eat dough it is more tomato sauce and cheese.

She over stuffs her mouth, holds the bolus of food in there and starts to cry. I try to do a finger sweep to put her down for a nap and she clamps her teeth so hard that I am afraid for my fingers.

She made herself throw up 3 days in a row and I washed her up every day. She hates having her hair washed so I added that to the routine saying "I have to wash your hair because you are covered in vomit"

I started to give her even smaller portions than before and try to preemptively say "ah, show me that your mouth is empty" "oh good girl!!!"

Now for the past 2 weeks she starts to cry at the beginning of lunch but gets down to the business of eating, says "all done, ah" and then gets her positive reinforcement. I figure throughout the day here if she is eating 300 calories that is about it. I told her mother that we need to work as a team to make sure that the calories she is getting are the best calories possible- food value wise.

I have very little patience with kids who don't have good eating skills/habits. I know the food I serve is quality and tastes good. I have a dream to be a restauranteur so I put in a lot of effort in my menu planning and meal preparation and, while I shouldn't I do take offense when it is treated like I served them a pile of steaming dog crap. I know I shouldn't and that kids have particular tastes, issues with texture etc. but I think parents who get too rushed, impatient etc end up giving in and encouraging the behaviours just because it is easier. (this does not, of course apply to children who have physiological impairments that affect their eating).
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