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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCD Picking Up Later And Later And Later...
KBCsMommy 07:59 AM 06-11-2015
Hello ladies and gentleman!

I have a wonderful family that I have NEVER had any issues with what so ever. DCM is very friendly and we chat most mornings before she leaves in the morning. Kids are very well behaved for the most part. They pay on time and follow rules to the T.

My issue is that DCG #1 is 2yo and dcd picks up everyday and was always here between 3:45 and 4:15 occasionally would come at about 4:20 if he was running really late picking up. Not an issue..... DCM has a baby DCB#2 he is now 4 mo. As soon as DCM went back to work he was picking up everyday at about 4:25. This is a lot later than he normally does.

I casually mentioned it to DCM and she asks DCD about it and he says he's been going in later so he has to stay later. Then DCD starts coming at 4:30. He then says he's been going home to the bathroom then coming to pick up kids.

This week he has been showing up at 5 to pick up the kids. They are the first ones here at 7:15 and the last ones to leave by 30 minutes to 45 minutes....
I am getting fed up with it.

Today I am going to have a chat with DCD about picking his kids up ASAP after work. He tells DCM he doesn't understand what the big deal is and he doesn't understand what the problem is.

What can I say to him to make him understand what the big deal is about spending quality time with his kids........
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nanglgrl 08:06 AM 06-11-2015
IMO there is nothing you can say to make him understand quality time with his children is important. He either gets it or he doesn't. It depends on your contract. Do you do contracted hours or do people pay a flat fee and can come open to close? If so, is he arriving past your closing time or is he just arriving later than he used to? Even if you were to tell them that their children are the first to arrive and the last to leave it usually won't matter. Most clients will see it as time they are paying for and use it.
If you allow open to close then most parents will eventually take advantage of it. If you do contracted hours then you need to have a late fee and enforce it (if you haven't already).
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mommiebookworm 08:26 AM 06-11-2015
I ran into this same thing last year, it was even to the point that DCD was lying on the sign-out sheet about the time! (Because DCM would check the sheets) Honestly, I think he didn't want to be alone with both of his kids for that long before DCM got home.
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Unregistered 09:12 AM 06-11-2015
Originally Posted by nanglgrl:
IMO there is nothing you can say to make him understand quality time with his children is important. He either gets it or he doesn't. It depends on your contract. Do you do contracted hours or do people pay a flat fee and can come open to close? Even if you were to tell them that their children are the first to arrive and the last to leave it usually won't matter. Most clients will see it as time they are paying for and use it.
If you allow open to close then most parents will eventually take advantage of it.
Yes to this. I have two dcfs that are here open to close even on the days they are not working. The sad thing is these two children are developmentally behind in speech and have some sensory issues. I spend more time with them that one of the dck call me mommy. The only times they stay home or go home early is when I say they are sick or I call for pick up because they are sick. I know what dcps do on their own time shouldn't matter since I get paid either way, however it is sad that they go to the beach, etc without their children to give them that experience. I know for a fact after pick up they only have two hours with their child because they will comment dck goes to sleep at 6pm and sleeps for 13 hours so dck shouldn't be tired. They were coming a few minutes late here and there even on their days off. So now I charge my late fee if they are one minute late.
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Leigh 09:20 AM 06-11-2015
Originally Posted by mommiebookworm:
I ran into this same thing last year, it was even to the point that DCD was lying on the sign-out sheet about the time! (Because DCM would check the sheets) Honestly, I think he didn't want to be alone with both of his kids for that long before DCM got home.
BINGO. I have a DCD who gets off 90 minutes before DCM. DCM always picks up. ALWAYS.
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Unregistered 12:19 PM 06-11-2015
Originally Posted by KBCsMommy:
Hello ladies and gentleman!

I have a wonderful family that I have NEVER had any issues with what so ever. DCM is very friendly and we chat most mornings before she leaves in the morning. Kids are very well behaved for the most part. They pay on time and follow rules to the T.

My issue is that DCG #1 is 2yo and dcd picks up everyday and was always here between 3:45 and 4:15 occasionally would come at about 4:20 if he was running really late picking up. Not an issue..... DCM has a baby DCB#2 he is now 4 mo. As soon as DCM went back to work he was picking up everyday at about 4:25. This is a lot later than he normally does.

I casually mentioned it to DCM and she asks DCD about it and he says he's been going in later so he has to stay later. Then DCD starts coming at 4:30. He then says he's been going home to the bathroom then coming to pick up kids.

This week he has been showing up at 5 to pick up the kids. They are the first ones here at 7:15 and the last ones to leave by 30 minutes to 45 minutes....
I am getting fed up with it.

Today I am going to have a chat with DCD about picking his kids up ASAP after work. He tells DCM he doesn't understand what the big deal is and he doesn't understand what the problem is.

What can I say to him to make him understand what the big deal is about spending quality time with his kids........
Day Care Dad,
The PROBLEM with YOU not respecting MY time is that I have a LIFE. You are off, so there is NO reason to be LATE. Your employer would probably FIRE you if you showed up late on a daily basis, and you would DESERVE it. So now, you need to be on time, or I WILL fire you myself.

(That's the mean version)
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AmyKidsCo 12:34 PM 06-11-2015
What is your closing time, and what is their contracted pick up time? You can't make a parent want to spend time with their child, but you can enforce your policies.

If their contracted pick up time is 5 and you close at 5 or after you really can't do much except tell them that as of (date) you will no longer be able to care for their children after 4:30 (or whatever time you want) and are amending their contract. They can decide to go along with it or find other care.
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cheerfuldom 04:01 PM 06-11-2015
If they are the last family there, move up your closing time to 430 permanently because you know they can make it there by then. Tell them your business hours have changed but you know it wont be a problem because it never was in the past.
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lovemykidstoo 06:30 AM 11-19-2015
I agree with others, if you charge per day and not contracted hours, then you're kinda stuck unless you change your hours. I would absolutely change your hours. It will be the best thing for ya!! Good luck!
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Snowmom 07:08 AM 11-19-2015
I don't necessarily agree that "you're stuck" if you charge by day instead of contracted hours.
You have been caring for dck#1 for some time, so even if you never discussed contracted pick up times, there is an implied "needed" time that you have in place from your past history with these parents.
I would simply say "Hey parents, we need to talk about pick up times. When I agreed to take on dck#2, I was under the assumption that pick up time would be by 4:15, the way it has for X (amount of time you've had dck#1). Lately, the pick up time has been creeping up to 5pm and honestly, I'm not happy with this arrangement. There are 2 options I have for you. #1: you go back to your original pick up time of 4:15 or #2: I will charge an extra $X for the extra time since I ONLY have your children here past 4:15.
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Ariana 07:10 AM 11-19-2015
I had this exact same situation happening to me. Moms contracted hours were for 4:15pm and that turned into 4:30, then 4:45 until she was consistently here at 5pm. I contacted her and we revisited the contract and I started charging her more. Turns out mom is too cheap to buy a second car seat for her car so goes home and gets their other car that the dad has in the morning. Buying another carseat is way cheaper than paying me! She'd rather pay that extra money in daycare because the truth is she doesn't want to come early. For example she is off on Friday but is bringing DCG anyway. Whatever The vast majority of parents spend as little time as possible with their kids.

He is probably going home for some "bathroom" time on the internet if you catch me
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lovemykidstoo 07:15 AM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
I don't necessarily agree that "you're stuck" if you charge by day instead of contracted hours.
You have been caring for dck#1 for some time, so even if you never discussed contracted pick up times, there is an implied "needed" time that you have in place from your past history with these parents.
I would simply say "Hey parents, we need to talk about pick up times. When I agreed to take on dck#2, I was under the assumption that pick up time would be by 4:15, the way it has for X (amount of time you've had dck#1). Lately, the pick up time has been creeping up to 5pm and honestly, I'm not happy with this arrangement. There are 2 options I have for you. #1: you go back to your original pick up time of 4:15 or #2: I will charge an extra $X for the extra time since I ONLY have your children here past 4:15.
That's a good option too. I guess "stuck" wasn't really an appropriate word that I used.
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KIDZRMYBIZ 07:45 AM 11-19-2015
Originally Posted by Snowmom:
I don't necessarily agree that "you're stuck" if you charge by day instead of contracted hours.
You have been caring for dck#1 for some time, so even if you never discussed contracted pick up times, there is an implied "needed" time that you have in place from your past history with these parents.
I would simply say "Hey parents, we need to talk about pick up times. When I agreed to take on dck#2, I was under the assumption that pick up time would be by 4:15, the way it has for X (amount of time you've had dck#1). Lately, the pick up time has been creeping up to 5pm and honestly, I'm not happy with this arrangement. There are 2 options I have for you. #1: you go back to your original pick up time of 4:15 or #2: I will charge an extra $X for the extra time since I ONLY have your children here past 4:15.
This ^^ . This happens to me with almost every single kid enrolled here. When I interview, they all tell me one parent is off around 4:00, and will be here to pick up immediately after. Then, after attending for 2 weeks or so, the pick up time creeps steadily towards closing time. I think they just get comfortable with daycare and are happy to leave their children in our care for as long as they possibly can. If I had your situation and had just one DCF picking up later than everyone else, I would talk to them about it, and phrase it just as Snowmom did.


And Ariana! I think you hit the nail on the head! When I read OP saying he went home "to use the bathroom," I immediately thought that, too! Even if it is just to poo, I find that quite odd, and odder still to tell your provider that.
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daycarediva 10:22 AM 11-19-2015
I changed to contracted hours. I charge late fees for going outside of their contracted hours. PERIOD. If you only have those two kids there, I would officially change your closing time to 4:30. Pick ups beyond that time are not an option.
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Blackcat31 11:14 AM 11-19-2015
It's not really old (and as always still contains pertinent information) but just in case no one has noticed.... this thread is from June...
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laundrymom 11:42 AM 11-19-2015
A few months ago I had a dad who was late 30 minutes a couple days a week. He would say "I gave a friend a ride after work" or "I had to finish something after work."
I talked to him several times about it but one day he just didn't show. I called mom. Who used his iPhone locate app. Turns out he was giving a friend a "ride". And finishing "something" after work. He never lied to me. However, he left out the parts about his mistress being who he was with. Apparently they fell asleep after and mom woke him when she banged on the house door.
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Cat Herder 03:09 PM 11-19-2015
I have had something similar a few times, laundrymom. Typically starts with either parent putting the carseat/s into the trunk after drop offs. Just get's worse from there.....
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laundrymom 03:52 AM 11-20-2015
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
I have had something similar a few times, laundrymom. Typically starts with either parent putting the carseat/s into the trunk after drop offs. Just get's worse from there.....
Yes. Agreed. And the kids suffer.
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Tags:late fee, late fee policy, late pick up fee, late pickup
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