I am so mad right now I'm shaking, maybe I shouldn't be and shouldn't let it bother me but I have this one dc dad who is just always annoying and rude and I really just can't stand him, but I like his son. I've had them for over a year. I can go on and on about stuff he's done but to today.. 2 weeks ago I changed something and let everyone know in a newsletter, I used to allow kids to bring toys from home and now no longer allow it starting today, (which they knew this 2 weeks ago), instead we are having "show and tell" one day a week, I have been talking with the kids about this the last 2 weeks and although a couple of them may not understand just yet until we actually do it. So this morning he comes up here with 2 toys in his hand, dad is trying to get it from him with no luck, (why did he even let him leave their house with them???) He's the parent tell him no, so he says fine let Michelle tell you, so he comes up to the door and he says she'll tell you you can't bring them, I reminded him that we weren't bringing toys from home and told him about the "show and tell" we've been talking about and said dad will need to take them home, he starts screaming and running back to the car, his dad says, it really sucks that rules are always put on us. I said rules are every where we go, we all have rules, when he goes to school he is not going to be allowed to take toys to school. He says oh I know I'm not mad, and as he's walking to go get his son he says it's your rules and you have a right to enforce them. so he pulls his son back up to the door screaming, pulling the stuff out of his hands saying I'm sorry I know it's not fair, I said thanks make me look bad and not being supportive, if you don't like the rules then he interrupts and says oh no it's cool, whatever, so I take off his shoes he's screaming and crying and kicking, dad turns around and leaves, I looked at the dcb and said you have a choice, you can either stop acting this way and go play with my toys or you can go sit in here, he didn't answer so I picked him up set him down and he continued to throw his tantrum for over 10 min.
Why can't parents tell their kids, no, why can't they be the parent and say this is the rules, why do they have to make ME tell them. I don't get people at all, not to mention this particular dad is always just saying and doing things. I'm sure his dad is laughing going, well at least I didn't have to deal with it, it's HER rule, instead of tell me telling him no and listening to him scream and cry all the way to her house, she can tell him and listen to it. I just don't get it. My husband said I need to let him go but I can't afford it.
Then another parent who can't tell her son no did the same thing!!!! At least she said it isnt' fair so you need to give it to me, but again why can't people tell their kids at home NO!!!! Am I going to have to deal with this every day??? What a way to start out my monday.

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Sorry that happened. Some parents have no clue. I know you dont want toys in the daycare, I dont allow it either. Some kids bring them in the morning ( because their parents cant say no.) and I just let them say a quick goodbye. Then I explain to the kids once parents are gone that they are not allowed to bring toys to my house, and must stay in their cubby until it is show and tell time, or pick up time. NONE of them have a problem with that. Then at pick up I gently ( note sarcasm) remind parents that no toys are allowed here.

Good luck. I understand about wanting to let him go, but not being able to afford it. Do you always deal with dad? Can you remind mom? If always dad then I would tell him at pick up, that to make tomorrows drop off easier, it would be great if they would follow the rules.

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If it happens at drop off tomorow id tell dcd that he has to stay with his son untill he is able to join the rest of the daycare since his dad is the one that caused the issue by allowing the toys out of the house. I also dont allow toys drinks or food from home, the kids usually are quick to understand that the rules at home are not the same as at daycare. Can you advertise for a new kid and as soon as you get one give the pita dcd his two weeks notice?
Kiddie Care

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Thanks, I thought about letting them put it in their cubby if they bring it BUT toys always cause problems at pickup then, the kids all want to see it and then the one who's getting picked up starts acting out, you know the whole, acting out when parents come, only a couple of mine but still, it just makes it easier to not even bring it at all. I always have to deal with dad, he's always pushing the rules always, it really makes me so mad. His son behaves very well for me, most of the time but he knows the "rules" here and is a great boy. Dad comes and it's back to screaming and crying, his dad can't even get his coat on because he throws a fit and he just lets it go, he doesn't ever take control, at least not in front of me. He's pushed the rules of my closing time, my payments, he even had the nerve to say that our huge camping trailer is a hazaard in our driveway because HIS son almost runs into it, but his dad always parks right next to it, we have a long drive way he can avoid parking right next to it, he can pull up, not pull up so far, he can even park over further from it, but he insists on lining his car door up right with it. I told him all of that. He was asked not to block my whole drive way shortly after he started, I had to tell him twice, he wouldnt' listen to me, so my husband told him and he stopped. He's just an A** he doesn't like rules apparently or maybe by me a female. I don't know. Thanks I just needed to vent a little

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I agree with previous poster- I say start advertising right away, so that you can tell him professionally that at your house, we have rules. If the rules are not supported by the parents, then it causes unnecessary stress on the kids. Let him know that you expect him to adhere to your policies, and that includes the hours that you provide care to his son. Let him huff and puff, and either adjust to it or find a program that is a better fit.

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Thanks, I told him that he needs to follow the rules like everyone else, he said oh I know, I understand I just think it's sucks that we all have rules put on us, but by telling his son when he's crying and throwing a fit, it's ok, I know it's not fair, he's not supporting what I am doing which makes me so angry. Unfortunetly I have 2 openings that I'm currently advertising for. I have 2 kids leaving one for school, well both and one staying with grandma for summer, so it's hard to fill 2 spots at once, if I get rid of him I'd have 3 spots. The other bad thing is timing. The 2 are still here, so one is leaving end of june, the other is leaving tomorrow. I get alot of calls but all for infants and I'm not taking infants. I think if I fill these spots I just may give them the boot, even though I'll feel bad for his son because he's really a good kid and I'm sure not so healthy being with dad all day (his dad doesn't work, probablly cuz he doesn't like following the rules. Thanks for the advise and letting me get it off my chest.

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Then it sounds like what you might need to tell him is just that- When he does it again (in front of his son) you can remind him. I would say something like, "You need to realize that I expect to be supported by parents in front of the children at all times. If you are going to complain about my rules, you need to bring it to my attention in private, but I will not tolerate the example you are setting for disrespect in my house."
Some dads are just little boys with children that have not matured as they have aged. They try to push it all the time, and you can just picture them behaving that way as a child, can't you?

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No toys etc from home is in my policies that parents sign up front- I explain its harder to enforce sharing, fights result- things get misplaced or broken etc. & to not bring it AT ALL. I'm not spending 15 mn at pickup looking for some dumb Mcd's toy they brought and stuck somewhere that the kid wont go home without. I would explain it is the dad's responsibility to follow policies & rules, including updates like the one about toys. Perhaps a "Surely you understand as his parent that your example determines his success for a lifetime, and you are setting him up for a failure because you can't handle a couple days fuss at your home to leave the toy behind. Thats not dcb's fault- It's yours." Make sure you right up and print an ADDENDUM TO POLICIES/CONTRACT for all to sign. If he tries that crap again- I would flat out at the door say "those temper fits might work on dad, but they don't work here. I'm sorry your dad made this morning harder for you by not observing the rules and leaving it at home. Stop now or go to the timeout. Let dad & child know right then at the door that 3rd times the charm- one more am episode like that and there will be a consequence- like a 1 day paid suspension for not complying with policy, or missing out on an upcoming fieldtrip or event because they can't be trusted to control their behavior.

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I would just wait till Dad walked out the door and take the toy. Put it in a box or a bucket outside at the end of your sidewalk. When they leave they can stop by and pick it up. That way it's out of your house and away from your door.

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I don't have parents dress or undress kids. I do it all. I don't want the fight. We dress the kids a few minutes before parents are to arrive. If the parent comes early I don't answer my door until I have the kid dressed. Really speeds up arrivals and departures.

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I totally agree with this. I started doing this about 4 yrs. ago, it does speed things up, and you don't have kids acting up all the time, running around, etc. when parents try to dress them. I start about 10 min. before clsoing time, if anyone is still here then. It has really helped out a ton!!!!!!

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Good idea! I only have them ready & waiting if a parent is late... Kinda gives them a hint lol. I have kids that come before 7 & get picked up in the 3-3:30 range, and 2 families that are here longer- 1 from 7:30 til anywhere from 5:15 to 5:30 -the county worker who works 10 mn away( It depends on if she stops for cigarettes on her way, I think) and a construction worker& nurse couple who pick up anywhere from 4:30 to 5:30, depending on the season/where he's working. It seems like it might be difficult to implement consistently when you have multiple pick up times.

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I like that idea, putting the toy at the sidewalk and telling them to pick it up when he leaves, however I have alot of little neighbor kids that would probablly snatch it, guess his problem. I also dress the kids before parents arrive, and shoes on. This dad doesn't hardly ever leave a coat here, because apparently he can't get it on him, but he'll bring it when he gets here and then there's the fight, he gives up and just doesn't put it on him, hmmm

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Tell dcd and boy, Any toys brought into my house are donations to my daycare.

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Too funny!

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