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Old 02-04-2016, 08:37 PM
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Preschool/daycare teacher Preschool/daycare teacher is offline
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Default Moving. How to tell this particular family

It is official now, it looks like. My husband and I will be moving across the country. It is a ministry opportunity that we really feel we need to do, although we don't want to at the same time (very long story). All of our family and friends are in this area. And I'm going to have to say goodbye to these families I worked so hard to enroll after just moving here in May One of these families has been with me since dcg was only 15 months old and her family has always just went out of their way to keep dcg with me. Dcg is 7 years old now and it seems like she should be part of my family. I can't stand the thought of leaving her and having to let her family know I won't be able to take care of her anymore. I almost feel like I'll be leaving my own child. Not quite, but you know what I mean. This family is beyond just a daycare family. They are my friends after all this time, and we have a really good bond with each other. My family and this family even know each other. I'll be recommending my sister to them for taking care of dcg (my sister "babysits" as she calls it), and dcg knows her and her kids well. But how do I break this news to them, given the personal relationship? I can't even give a month's notice And because dcg is in school and has a bunch of snow days to make up, I'm not even scheduled to have her again before I have to move
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Old 02-05-2016, 07:01 AM
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Originally Posted by Preschool/daycare teacher View Post
It is official now, it looks like. My husband and I will be moving across the country. It is a ministry opportunity that we really feel we need to do, although we don't want to at the same time (very long story). All of our family and friends are in this area. And I'm going to have to say goodbye to these families I worked so hard to enroll after just moving here in May One of these families has been with me since dcg was only 15 months old and her family has always just went out of their way to keep dcg with me. Dcg is 7 years old now and it seems like she should be part of my family. I can't stand the thought of leaving her and having to let her family know I won't be able to take care of her anymore. I almost feel like I'll be leaving my own child. Not quite, but you know what I mean. This family is beyond just a daycare family. They are my friends after all this time, and we have a really good bond with each other. My family and this family even know each other. I'll be recommending my sister to them for taking care of dcg (my sister "babysits" as she calls it), and dcg knows her and her kids well. But how do I break this news to them, given the personal relationship? I can't even give a month's notice And because dcg is in school and has a bunch of snow days to make up, I'm not even scheduled to have her again before I have to move
Because you ARE more than just client-provider, I'd just be honest and tell them you "have" to do this. You stated in the beginning of your post that you didn't want to but have to. I am assuming it is more of a calling if it's ministry related. If so, just be honest with them then.

Im sure it was a super hard decision to make but one you feel you HAD to. It will be hard to tell them but if the pull to do this is that strong, and the know you (really know you) they are going to be sad for sure but will understand.

I would just ask them if they have the time to stay a bit longer at pick up and then invite them in for coffee and tell them. As friends (above being just clients) they will, like I said be sad but they will more than likely totally understand the situation.

Telling them IS the hard part. But it will be okay.

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Old 02-05-2016, 07:17 AM
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The problem is, since dcg is school age and her family doesn't need after school care, I only have her now when there's no school. So I'm not supposed to have her anymore before we move. I know they will understand since they know my husband is in ministry and they're Christians as well, but it's still hard to actually tell them. I don't want to do this over the phone or e-mail or anything, but I'm not supposed to have her again this month. Maybe I'll ask dcm if she can stop by after work. I live out of the way for her, but I'm sure she'd rather hear it in person.
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Old 02-05-2016, 07:18 AM
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I completely agree with BlackCat. Invite them in for a sit down and maybe a cry! It will be tough all around but that is life as providers and daycare families. Wishing you all the best in your new state and ministry
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Old 02-05-2016, 10:13 AM
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I would (as with anything) pray first! Then, maybe ask if you can meet the family for coffee, at a park etc. Once there you can explain. Being obedient to God and following his calling is so, so, important. They'll understand I will pray for you as well!
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Old 02-05-2016, 07:19 PM
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I would (as with anything) pray first! Then, maybe ask if you can meet the family for coffee, at a park etc. Once there you can explain. Being obedient to God and following his calling is so, so, important. They'll understand I will pray for you as well!

My heart aches for you just reading this. It's like I could feel you being pulled in two opposite directions and the pain that causes. It will be hard to tell them, but since you guys are so close I think they will understand. Maybe you could schedule a special playdate as a chance to say goodbye for a while before you go? Sometimes its so hard to do what we know we're called to do, but it is always worth it. Praying for peace!
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Old 02-05-2016, 07:26 PM
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Oh, you all have no idea how much the support and prayers mean to me! It has been a rough day. I really appreciate it! Mamamanda, you hit it right on the head. Pulled in two different directions is exactly what it feels like.
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Old 02-06-2016, 02:50 AM
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My heart goes out to you because this is one of the hardest parts of this profession. Sometimes these children do become almost like a member of the family to us and even if we only lose them by aging out, it still leaves a big gap.

If it were me, I think I'd meet with them family to family, and tell them all together. Maybe bring dcg a special gift. Arrange to definitely keep in touch. And let them know how much they've touched your lives. You will cry. They might cry. There will be hugs and tears galore. But make a pact to write often, send pictures, remain there for each other. You never know when you'll be heading back to your current area. Distance in miles does not have to mean distance in the heart.

And Good Luck with your move!!!
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