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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Please Advise - Just Found Out That I Have Breast Cancer
Unregistered 11:19 PM 11-08-2011
Hi ladies, I could really use your advice here. I currently provide full time care for 3 DCKs. I just found out that I have breast cancer. I will see the surgeon on Thursday for more information. Do I go ahead and tell the DCP or wait until I find out about treatment and such before I say anything? I feel numb. I hope I can continue to keep these kids but I just really don't know what lies ahead. Has anyone been through this before and continued on with daycare while taking treatments? Thanks for listening.
Jan
Jan
Michael 11:28 PM 11-08-2011
Sorry to hear about that. I wish you all the luck with your surgery. You should check back in tomorrow when the forum gets busier. Also consider registering. that way you can post un-moderated and freely.
PitterPatter 03:39 AM 11-09-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Hi ladies, I could really use your advice here. I currently provide full time care for 3 DCKs. I just found out that I have breast cancer. I will see the surgeon on Thursday for more information. Do I go ahead and tell the DCP or wait until I find out about treatment and such before I say anything? I feel numb. I hope I can continue to keep these kids but I just really don't know what lies ahead. Has anyone been through this before and continued on with daycare while taking treatments? Thanks for listening.
Jan
I'm so sorry to hear that! You and your health come first. If you are not up to par then it will reflect in daycare. If you can I would take some time off at least until you get things in order and begin the necessary procedures. During this time you need to minimize your stress as much as possible. Is there anyone who can come in and help you? May God bless you and heal your body soon!Hi ladies, I could really use your advice here. I currently provide full time care for 3 DCKs. I just found out that I have breast cancer. I will see the surgeon on Thursday for more information. Do I go ahead and tell the DCP or wait until I find out about treatment and such before I say anything? I feel numb. I hope I can continue to keep these kids but I just really don't know what lies ahead. Has anyone been through this before and continued on with daycare while taking treatments? Thanks for listening.
Jan
boysx5 03:43 AM 11-09-2011
so sorry I would wait to hear to what they say but your health should always come first
Francine 04:01 AM 11-09-2011
I'm so sorry! I guess if it were me I would wait until I hear what the Doc says but like the others have said, your health comes first you have to take care of yourself. Hope all goes well, you will be in my prayers!
themoorethemerrier 06:02 AM 11-09-2011
Oh, I'm sorry!
I would wait for the appt to see what will be entailed and then talk to the DCFs. I would think that they would be understanding, but they will still need care for the times that you are unable to.
Praying strength for you and yours and speedy recovery for your body!
I would wait for the appt to see what will be entailed and then talk to the DCFs. I would think that they would be understanding, but they will still need care for the times that you are unable to.
Praying strength for you and yours and speedy recovery for your body!
Zoe 06:21 AM 11-09-2011
Do you have a good sub? I had a teacher friend of mine go through the same thing you are going through. She was able to continue teaching but had a great sub to fill in during her chemo treatments. I'm so sorry you're going through this! Hugs to you!
KEG123 06:30 AM 11-09-2011
I'd personally wait to tell until you have a plan in place. That way you can be more direct with them, in what is going to happen. I'd also personally get a sub/assistant to be there both when you have appointments and at "busier" times of the day, maybe even all day if needed. Yes, it would likely result in a loss in income because of having to hire the assistant, but some income is better than no income.
big :hugs:
big :hugs:
youretooloud 06:34 AM 11-09-2011
I am SO sorry!!!!!
I have never been through this. But, I have friends who have survived who DID go through this not too long ago. They had to quit daycare right away.
If you'd like to talk to them, send me an email and I'll get you in touch with them so they can tell you what to do. I've had cancer scares (just little scares) and these ladies helped me with that. So, I know they are awesome at talking you through what you will be experiencing this year.
It's going to be a lousy year....but, you can handle this! I promise.
I have never been through this. But, I have friends who have survived who DID go through this not too long ago. They had to quit daycare right away.
If you'd like to talk to them, send me an email and I'll get you in touch with them so they can tell you what to do. I've had cancer scares (just little scares) and these ladies helped me with that. So, I know they are awesome at talking you through what you will be experiencing this year.
It's going to be a lousy year....but, you can handle this! I promise.
beachgrl 07:03 AM 11-09-2011
So sorry to hear about this, I would personally wait until I learned more about what and all would need to be done so I would know what I could and couldn't do and have more concrete explanation for the parents. A co-worker of mine when I taught had to have treatment, her's was not very far along and she had to do radiation treatments and take meds but for the most part she continued teaching. She had to get a sub a few times to fill in for appointments but for the most part she was able to keep working.
I think it depends on case by case and how you are feeling as you start treatments, wait and see what and all is recommended to do and even talk to your doctor about what to expect and if you would be able to continue care with the kids. Wish you the best!
I think it depends on case by case and how you are feeling as you start treatments, wait and see what and all is recommended to do and even talk to your doctor about what to expect and if you would be able to continue care with the kids. Wish you the best!
youretooloud 07:18 AM 11-09-2011
Also, if you want to talk to these friends of mine, but, don't want to let me know your name, tell Michael, and I'll send the info to him. I'm all about anonymity, and don't want to make anybody uncomfortable.
sharlan 07:28 AM 11-09-2011
You are strong and will get through this.
I am a breast cancer survivor. I was originally diagnosed with advanced 3rd stage in Oct 91. I was given about 6 mos to live. Here I am 20 years later, doing just fine. I was again diagnosed with a second bc, different type, in April of 2005. 6 yrs later, I'm doing just fine.
I was able to continue doing my daycare because my daughters were able to help me out. I took 2 wks off the first go 'round because I was in the hospital for a week. I didn't take a single day off the second time. My kids learned which nurses I liked and which ones I didn't and would be sure to tell me who they saw.
This adventure you are about to take will be harder on your family and friends than it will be on you. I'm not saying that it won't be hard, it will be. But remember that they are going through it, too. Allow people to help you, by running errands, taking your kids for the day, cooking meals, whatever you want.
Stay positive, it will go a very long way in your healing process.
Please feel free to pm me if you would like.
I am a breast cancer survivor. I was originally diagnosed with advanced 3rd stage in Oct 91. I was given about 6 mos to live. Here I am 20 years later, doing just fine. I was again diagnosed with a second bc, different type, in April of 2005. 6 yrs later, I'm doing just fine.
I was able to continue doing my daycare because my daughters were able to help me out. I took 2 wks off the first go 'round because I was in the hospital for a week. I didn't take a single day off the second time. My kids learned which nurses I liked and which ones I didn't and would be sure to tell me who they saw.
This adventure you are about to take will be harder on your family and friends than it will be on you. I'm not saying that it won't be hard, it will be. But remember that they are going through it, too. Allow people to help you, by running errands, taking your kids for the day, cooking meals, whatever you want.
Stay positive, it will go a very long way in your healing process.
Please feel free to pm me if you would like.
MarinaVanessa 07:45 AM 11-09-2011
I'm sorry that you are going through this 
.
If you don't want to stop doing DC and the DC kids don't add to the stress of your diagnosis then I would wait and see what the doctor tells you. It really depends on what the treatment is. Once you know what the next step is then you can decide when to tell your DC families. Obviously if you'll be getting surgery, radiation or chemo you'll want to stop doing DC until you've finished and are feeling better but there is no need to say anything yet (unless you want to).
Also, when you do decide to tell your DC families don't feel that you need to tell them your diagnosis. That's something private that you don't have to share. You can always just say that due to medical reasons you will no longer be able to offer DC services.
You're in our thoughts and prayers. Stay strong.
. If you don't want to stop doing DC and the DC kids don't add to the stress of your diagnosis then I would wait and see what the doctor tells you. It really depends on what the treatment is. Once you know what the next step is then you can decide when to tell your DC families. Obviously if you'll be getting surgery, radiation or chemo you'll want to stop doing DC until you've finished and are feeling better but there is no need to say anything yet (unless you want to).
Also, when you do decide to tell your DC families don't feel that you need to tell them your diagnosis. That's something private that you don't have to share. You can always just say that due to medical reasons you will no longer be able to offer DC services.
You're in our thoughts and prayers. Stay strong.
Unregistered 09:44 AM 11-09-2011
Thanks to all of you who replied! You ladies are great! Thanks so much for the encouragement and advice. I have just been a mess the last 2 to 3 days searching for the best way to handle this. I will wait until I have seen the surgeon and had surgery and will go from there. Right now my mother can sub for me. I guess the fear of the unknown is always frightening.
Sharlan - Thanks for sharing your story with me. It always helps to hear from someone who has been through it. I am so proud that you are cancer free today. May God continue to bless you.
Please keep me in your prayers. I really have learned a lot from 'lurking' on this forum. You ladies ROCK!!! I really love my DCKs and DCFs and I don't want to put them in a bad situation...they have been so good to me! Thanks again for your help.
Jan
Sharlan - Thanks for sharing your story with me. It always helps to hear from someone who has been through it. I am so proud that you are cancer free today. May God continue to bless you.
Please keep me in your prayers. I really have learned a lot from 'lurking' on this forum. You ladies ROCK!!! I really love my DCKs and DCFs and I don't want to put them in a bad situation...they have been so good to me! Thanks again for your help.
Jan
karen 10:43 AM 11-09-2011
I am sorry you are going through this as well. What tough decisions you have to make. If it was me I wouldn't say anything to the parents until I knew for sure what was going to happen.
STAY STRONG STAY POSITIVE AND YOU CAN BEAT THIS!!!!
STAY STRONG STAY POSITIVE AND YOU CAN BEAT THIS!!!!
wdmmom 11:03 AM 11-09-2011
I'm so sorry! How terribly scary for you!
I would suggest talking to your surgeon/doctor and find out whether surgery is an option, how invasive it will be, whether chemo or radiation will be necessary, etc.
Until you get all of the information on treatment, recovery, etc. I wouldn't say anything.
I would suggest talking to your surgeon/doctor and find out whether surgery is an option, how invasive it will be, whether chemo or radiation will be necessary, etc.
Until you get all of the information on treatment, recovery, etc. I wouldn't say anything.
Christian Mother 11:25 AM 11-09-2011
Jan,
I pray that God's healing hand rests on your body. That he cradles you in his arms so that all worry and fears diminish. Stay strong in this battle. It will be a tough road but you'll NOT be a lone in it.
I pray that God's healing hand rests on your body. That he cradles you in his arms so that all worry and fears diminish. Stay strong in this battle. It will be a tough road but you'll NOT be a lone in it.
CheekyChick 01:02 PM 11-09-2011
I am so sorry to hear this. You are in my prayers.
You are in my prayers.
jen 01:32 PM 11-09-2011
Hugs and prayers! You are in our prayers and I hope that you will keep coming back for encouragement and a place to vent when needed.
Sprouts 01:51 PM 11-09-2011
Stay strong, I am so sorry to hear...
I just watched two documentaries: beautiful truth and The Gerson Miracle
i would check them out, http://gerson.org/
a lot of people gave very convinving testimonies of how they recovered from cancers using thising this method, its worth a shot...
I just watched two documentaries: beautiful truth and The Gerson Miracle
i would check them out, http://gerson.org/
a lot of people gave very convinving testimonies of how they recovered from cancers using thising this method, its worth a shot...
sharlan 02:03 PM 11-09-2011
You may find that your daycare families will provide you with a lot of support.
I had one mother who took a day off to stay with all the kids while my dh and daughters went to my last chemo with me the first go 'round. Another mother took me to the hospital for blood tests when I was too tired to drive. Another mother took the day off so that she could sit in the hospital with me all day while I had chemo. One took my kids shopping and out to lunch one Sat so I could sleep all day. Others brought my family dinner when they picked up their kids.
Not all families are that giving, I understand. I did have one family that termed because their 3 yo was already having night terrors and knowing that I was going to die would be too hard on him. (OK, I had no plans on dying.)
You will also have people coming out of the woodwork like cockroaches to provide you with unsolicited advice. Be sure to take it all with a grain of salt. Do your own investigating.
You will also have friends pull away as if they're afraid that cancer is contagious. It's not. My best friend pulled away. I finally called and confronted him. He said it was because he didn't know what to say to me anymore. I asked what did he usually say when he saw me - hey, how's your day going. I said that was what I wanted to continue hearing.
I had one mother who took a day off to stay with all the kids while my dh and daughters went to my last chemo with me the first go 'round. Another mother took me to the hospital for blood tests when I was too tired to drive. Another mother took the day off so that she could sit in the hospital with me all day while I had chemo. One took my kids shopping and out to lunch one Sat so I could sleep all day. Others brought my family dinner when they picked up their kids.
Not all families are that giving, I understand. I did have one family that termed because their 3 yo was already having night terrors and knowing that I was going to die would be too hard on him. (OK, I had no plans on dying.)
You will also have people coming out of the woodwork like cockroaches to provide you with unsolicited advice. Be sure to take it all with a grain of salt. Do your own investigating.
You will also have friends pull away as if they're afraid that cancer is contagious. It's not. My best friend pulled away. I finally called and confronted him. He said it was because he didn't know what to say to me anymore. I asked what did he usually say when he saw me - hey, how's your day going. I said that was what I wanted to continue hearing.
grandmom 02:13 PM 11-09-2011
Praying for strength and peace that passes all understanding.