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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Do Parents Pick Up Their Kids Randomly
dave4him 01:49 PM 01-26-2012
I realize of course she doesnt have much of a social or work life during the daytime hours, but its pretty annoying when my sil doesnt tell me in advance if there iis a doctor appt and shes going to be picking up her girl in the middle of nap time in the afternoon, it disrupts everyone else and she doesnt get to do her crafts or complete her day of activity and fun. Shes just been so random on pick up lately! OY
Breezy 01:51 PM 01-26-2012
Nope they are pretty much regular and on time! Or they call if something comes up and they're on their way
youretooloud 01:54 PM 01-26-2012
Mine never come during nap time without calling first. They are all pretty good about this and they understand.
For the most part, anything out of the ordinary, they always let me know.
For the most part, anything out of the ordinary, they always let me know.
Blackcat31 02:08 PM 01-26-2012
Mine all give me one weeks schedule with drop off times and pick up times that are VERY specific.
Late fees begin within minutes outside of those times.
Late fees begin within minutes outside of those times.
JenNJ 02:12 PM 01-26-2012
Nope. My parents email or text me if it is last minute but usually I know the night before or morning of. My clients are super considerate. If they pick up at nap, they text me from 5 minutes away so their kids are dressed when they pull up. Then when they pull up, I send the littles right onto the porch where mom or dad is waiting. My clients don't even come in when they pick up early! Love them!!
bunnyslippers 02:21 PM 01-26-2012
The only random pick-ups I get are also from my S-I-L! Too funny (and also too annoying). I am closed on snow days...and we have snow predicted tomorrow. She looked at me today and said, "Oh, so I can't bring him anyway? He IS your nephew!" Oh my. Love her, and my nephew. BUT, sometimes I wish she would choose a different child care. So hard to say no to your own family...
Meyou 02:30 PM 01-26-2012
Mine are very regular. If something unusual happens and they want to pick up early they call or text to let me know. It rarely happens though.
MissK 02:52 PM 01-26-2012
The only time I've ever picked up unexpectedly was honestly to kind of check in on my provider. It wasn't during nap time or anyting it was just about an hour early (4:15ish)
saved4always 02:55 PM 01-26-2012
Originally Posted by Breezy:
Nope they are pretty much regular and on time! Or they call if something comes up and they're on their way
Yep, me too. The kids get picked up on time or the parents let me know if they will pick up early.Nope they are pretty much regular and on time! Or they call if something comes up and they're on their way
Daycaremomof2 05:25 PM 01-26-2012
I have a family that does that. I had to ask them to let me know ahead of time, because I have babies that take some time to get to sleep, and I don't want to start sleep routing and have to do it again because I had to answer the door. I also had to put up a sign to knock first, because they always came, ringing the doorbell at 2:00.
Since then, it hasn't been a problem. I just let the child sleep and when they arrive I get him. It disrupts the schedule, and sometimes wakes up the others still, but I understand that they are off early and eager to pick up their child.
Still a pain though
Since then, it hasn't been a problem. I just let the child sleep and when they arrive I get him. It disrupts the schedule, and sometimes wakes up the others still, but I understand that they are off early and eager to pick up their child.
Still a pain though
seebachers 04:45 AM 01-27-2012
I believe a long talk with SIL is in order. She is taking advantage of her relationship to you and not seeing you or treating you as a professional. On the other hand, you are allowing/enabling her to take advantage by not correcting the behavior as it happens to come up. (Of course, this is directed at some of the other posts you have made about her and her lack of consideration - not just early pick ups)
It is absolutely wonderful that you are able to provide care for your kin and will have a lasting impression on the little own through the growing years. As time goes by, the relationship between you and SIL will begin to deteriorate if you don't air the problems now. I understand that she is a very young mom but you will be doing her a favor by teaching her how to handle herself in situations such as these - especially when little one starts going to school a few years from now.
Let her know that you love the little one but there are a few things that you would like to discuss (ie. not arriving during nap time if can be avoided, giving you heads up on appointments and the like, etc. It is common courtesy.
I am all for the parents arriving a little early sometimes to do a drop in inspection of care - most providers are quite happy to have little ones go home early
It is no different than when the state arrives for an unannounced visit and nothing really wrong with it, but does upset our routine.
It seems that she doesn't view what you are doing as a vital and important. Once you can set her straight that this is your profession and that it is your business, hopefully she will start treating you with the respect that you are due.
Good luck.
Oh and to answer your question, my parents have an expected drop off time and pick up time and if it changes, I am to receive a text or a phone call confirming.
It is absolutely wonderful that you are able to provide care for your kin and will have a lasting impression on the little own through the growing years. As time goes by, the relationship between you and SIL will begin to deteriorate if you don't air the problems now. I understand that she is a very young mom but you will be doing her a favor by teaching her how to handle herself in situations such as these - especially when little one starts going to school a few years from now.
Let her know that you love the little one but there are a few things that you would like to discuss (ie. not arriving during nap time if can be avoided, giving you heads up on appointments and the like, etc. It is common courtesy.
I am all for the parents arriving a little early sometimes to do a drop in inspection of care - most providers are quite happy to have little ones go home early
It is no different than when the state arrives for an unannounced visit and nothing really wrong with it, but does upset our routine. It seems that she doesn't view what you are doing as a vital and important. Once you can set her straight that this is your profession and that it is your business, hopefully she will start treating you with the respect that you are due.
Good luck.
Oh and to answer your question, my parents have an expected drop off time and pick up time and if it changes, I am to receive a text or a phone call confirming.
Cat Herder 05:01 AM 01-27-2012
She may be following the recommendations from ALL the parenting magazines about doing random drop-bys....
BUT this is your family so, IMHO, she is being a passive aggressive drama queen. Now, at 17 she IS acting developmentally appropriate....
My greater concern would be your MIL's manipulation of her......
My advice...take it or leave it.......would be to assist her in finding another provider. It is your first month and you already have a few "My SIL" AND "My MIL" posts.....
This cannot be good for you and your Wife. It just can't..... It will take it's toll on your whole family and is just NOT WORTH IT. Please, just think about it....
BUT this is your family so, IMHO, she is being a passive aggressive drama queen. Now, at 17 she IS acting developmentally appropriate....
My greater concern would be your MIL's manipulation of her......
My advice...take it or leave it.......would be to assist her in finding another provider. It is your first month and you already have a few "My SIL" AND "My MIL" posts.....
This cannot be good for you and your Wife. It just can't..... It will take it's toll on your whole family and is just NOT WORTH IT. Please, just think about it....
dave4him 12:19 PM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by Catherder:
She may be following the recommendations from ALL the parenting magazines about doing random drop-bys....
I keep reading your user name as She may be following the recommendations from ALL the parenting magazines about doing random drop-bys....
'catheter' OY
I am going to have to go with the simple answer that its probably just her being herself. She doesnt think to call ahead when shes got to pick her up for an appointment because shes used to a bigger daycare where they didnt care. And i love my niece too much to kick her to the curb for that reason anyway... though i am looking for another kid to add to the two i am watching so far. Our income is dropping next month as a whole and its either this or i go back to work and have to find a place for my own... which i am not willing to do. Thanks Cat
KEG123 12:23 PM 01-27-2012
One of my families will sometimes get off work early on Fridays and will pick up their son if so. I know it's a possiblity, but he always reminds me if he thinks it's more definite (normally it's only 30 minutes early or so)
The other family bases their schedule on mom's work schedule, since dad's hours are variable. If dad gets off early or something, he will pick up. He always texts me when he'll be here baout 10 minutes since his twins act ROWDY at pickup if they're not ready.
But for your situation, doctors appointments, etc, they always let me know.
The other family bases their schedule on mom's work schedule, since dad's hours are variable. If dad gets off early or something, he will pick up. He always texts me when he'll be here baout 10 minutes since his twins act ROWDY at pickup if they're not ready.
But for your situation, doctors appointments, etc, they always let me know.
dEHmom 12:46 PM 01-27-2012
I would simply advise that without prior notice of an unscheduled drop in, the door will not be answered. All visitors must be expected for safety reasons.
Also, the fact that without you knowing they are coming at an unscheduled time, you may not be home. we go on walks at whatever time works for us. we try to schedule these in at specific times, but sometimes we go off of our schedule here. like today, 2 of my infants needed a morning nap. which threw off our whole day.
Also, the fact that without you knowing they are coming at an unscheduled time, you may not be home. we go on walks at whatever time works for us. we try to schedule these in at specific times, but sometimes we go off of our schedule here. like today, 2 of my infants needed a morning nap. which threw off our whole day.
Unregistered 02:07 PM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
I would simply advise that without prior notice of an unscheduled drop in, the door will not be answered. All visitors must be expected for safety reasons.
Also, the fact that without you knowing they are coming at an unscheduled time, you may not be home. we go on walks at whatever time works for us. we try to schedule these in at specific times, but sometimes we go off of our schedule here. like today, 2 of my infants needed a morning nap. which threw off our whole day.
In my state by law parents can drop by anytime their child is in care and can inspect the parts of the house that are open to the daycare. When I was a parent with a child in daycare I would often pick up an hour or two early because I had a very flexible work schedule and I liked to check in every once in a while to make sure that what I saw at regular pick up time was what I'd see all the time. If we had a specific appointment or something I would let them know at drop off. Now as a provider I expect parents to do the same and have no problem with it. If we leave for a walk I put a note on the door with my cell number in case they come early. Whether it interrupts your schedule or is just annoying matters little, these are their children and they can check in on them when they want and can certainly pick them up when they want. If I showed up at my child's daycare and the door wasn't answered I'd call the police!I would simply advise that without prior notice of an unscheduled drop in, the door will not be answered. All visitors must be expected for safety reasons.
Also, the fact that without you knowing they are coming at an unscheduled time, you may not be home. we go on walks at whatever time works for us. we try to schedule these in at specific times, but sometimes we go off of our schedule here. like today, 2 of my infants needed a morning nap. which threw off our whole day.
youretooloud 02:47 PM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by MissK:
The only time I've ever picked up unexpectedly was honestly to kind of check in on my provider. It wasn't during nap time or anyting it was just about an hour early (4:15ish)
That's a good idea too!The only time I've ever picked up unexpectedly was honestly to kind of check in on my provider. It wasn't during nap time or anyting it was just about an hour early (4:15ish)
sharlan 03:24 PM 01-27-2012
My 9 yo gets picked up anywhere from 3:05 to 5:15. It all depends on who is picking him up and where they're coming from.
jojosmommy 03:51 PM 01-27-2012
Yes, my SIL is the worst for this too. I finally got snippy and told her she had to tell me what time. Lock your doirs, then when she knocks answer with " oh, I thought you were coming at ***x time". Then clearly tell her why you need to know the time, her child will be right in the middle of something, or whatever the reason.
Good Luck, family turns out to be the worst clients to have, especially if they dont respect you.
Good Luck, family turns out to be the worst clients to have, especially if they dont respect you.
Zoe 04:14 PM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by sharlan:
My 9 yo gets picked up anywhere from 3:05 to 5:15. It all depends on who is picking him up and where they're coming from.
Ditto. It's just this one family and it doesn't really bother me since they're contracted until 5 and never come during nap time. And I think they've actually picked up at 5 once in the year and a half since I've had them.My 9 yo gets picked up anywhere from 3:05 to 5:15. It all depends on who is picking him up and where they're coming from.
If it was a family that gave me grief about something, I'd mind, but this is an angel family so it's honestly ok with me.
If it bugs you, talk to her about it.
e.j. 06:09 PM 01-27-2012
[quote=Unregistered;191020]In my state by law parents can drop by anytime their child is in care and can inspect the parts of the house that are open to the daycare. QUOTE]
This is true in my state, too. As much as I appreciate being told ahead of time if a parent is planning to come early for pick-up, my dc parents are all aware they are allowed, by law, to drop in at any time.
In all the years I've been doing child care, I've only had one family who used to drop in unexpectedly to visit or pick up early. I definitely got the feeling they were trying to catch me doing something wrong because they'd do things like sneak around my garage into the backyard instead of going directly to the backdoor to knock, they'd quietly open the door and tiptoe through the kitchen (until I started locking it)... that kind of thing. The sneakiness used to drive me crazy more than the unexpected visits/pickups! All of my other parents let me know ahead of time, though.
This is true in my state, too. As much as I appreciate being told ahead of time if a parent is planning to come early for pick-up, my dc parents are all aware they are allowed, by law, to drop in at any time.
In all the years I've been doing child care, I've only had one family who used to drop in unexpectedly to visit or pick up early. I definitely got the feeling they were trying to catch me doing something wrong because they'd do things like sneak around my garage into the backyard instead of going directly to the backdoor to knock, they'd quietly open the door and tiptoe through the kitchen (until I started locking it)... that kind of thing. The sneakiness used to drive me crazy more than the unexpected visits/pickups! All of my other parents let me know ahead of time, though.
cheerfuldom 06:16 PM 01-27-2012
I understand the thought behind checking up on your daycare but is that really necessary in this case? This is a SIL and sounds like the OP has been more than willing to accommodate her in numerous ways and since they are family, its not like he is a stranger. Am I way off base? Do you really need to be keeping tabs on a your family? It sounds like the OP would love to start a daycare but at this point, is just watching kids from within the family (correct?) so its not like the SIL doesn't know who is there, who her kids are playing with and such.
saved4always 06:22 PM 01-27-2012
[quote=e.j.;191069]
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
In my state by law parents can drop by anytime their child is in care and can inspect the parts of the house that are open to the daycare. QUOTE]
This is true in my state, too. As much as I appreciate being told ahead of time if a parent is planning to come early for pick-up, my dc parents are all aware they are allowed, by law, to drop in at any time.
In all the years I've been doing child care, I've only had one family who used to drop in unexpectedly to visit or pick up early. I definitely got the feeling they were trying to catch me doing something wrong because they'd do things like sneak around my garage into the backyard instead of going directly to the backdoor to knock, they'd quietly open the door and tiptoe through the kitchen (until I started locking it)... that kind of thing. The sneakiness used to drive me crazy more than the unexpected visits/pickups! All of my other parents let me know ahead of time, though.
I could understand if they wanted to show up once in a while at a different time to check up on the provider. But being sneaky about coming in is not right. That would scare me to death if someone just "tiptoed" in and snuck up on me in my home. I think I am going to make sure from now on that my doors are always locked when I am not expecting anyone. In my state by law parents can drop by anytime their child is in care and can inspect the parts of the house that are open to the daycare. QUOTE]
This is true in my state, too. As much as I appreciate being told ahead of time if a parent is planning to come early for pick-up, my dc parents are all aware they are allowed, by law, to drop in at any time.
In all the years I've been doing child care, I've only had one family who used to drop in unexpectedly to visit or pick up early. I definitely got the feeling they were trying to catch me doing something wrong because they'd do things like sneak around my garage into the backyard instead of going directly to the backdoor to knock, they'd quietly open the door and tiptoe through the kitchen (until I started locking it)... that kind of thing. The sneakiness used to drive me crazy more than the unexpected visits/pickups! All of my other parents let me know ahead of time, though.
Unregistered 06:35 PM 01-27-2012
Originally Posted by dave4him:
I realize of course she doesnt have much of a social or work life during the daytime hours, but its pretty annoying when my sil doesnt tell me in advance if there iis a doctor appt and shes going to be picking up her girl in the middle of nap time in the afternoon, it disrupts everyone else and she doesnt get to do her crafts or complete her day of activity and fun. Shes just been so random on pick up lately! OY
I always used to let parents pick up kids whenever, even during nap. I would not allow them to ring the doorbell and I would always bring the child to them. I would never tell a parent they can't p/u early, this is their child. I would have more of a problem if they are p/u late, though, because now that is MY time they are taking from my family. But if they want their child early, you can't really object to that. As a parent, I always try to call if I'm going to be earlier than a 1/2 hr.I realize of course she doesnt have much of a social or work life during the daytime hours, but its pretty annoying when my sil doesnt tell me in advance if there iis a doctor appt and shes going to be picking up her girl in the middle of nap time in the afternoon, it disrupts everyone else and she doesnt get to do her crafts or complete her day of activity and fun. Shes just been so random on pick up lately! OY
beachgrl 07:54 PM 01-27-2012
My parents typically let me know if they will be picking up early and one dcm has been a couple hours early a few times but just bc she was off work and went ahead and came by whichnidps great by me. Her hubby even told me she would prolly pick up early at drop off one day and bc it was sooo nice out we were outside enjoying the sun and so nap was a little later than normal and he was still sleeping 5 min before she came, as soon as he heard the door he popped up and brought his bed and blanket to me lol...
My parents know around when naptime is so donypt usually pickup then. One has a dr appoint nxt week so she told me she would pick upmearly that day, they have all been pretty good w communication. I usually ask them to pick up before or after nap if they are going to so not to disturb the others, my silly dogs bark now when they hear my deadbolt bc they think someone is at the door they have gotten do used to hearing me unlock the door at normal pick up time lol
My parents know around when naptime is so donypt usually pickup then. One has a dr appoint nxt week so she told me she would pick upmearly that day, they have all been pretty good w communication. I usually ask them to pick up before or after nap if they are going to so not to disturb the others, my silly dogs bark now when they hear my deadbolt bc they think someone is at the door they have gotten do used to hearing me unlock the door at normal pick up time lol
Crazy8 08:25 PM 01-27-2012
I try to "discourage" nap time pick ups but like another poster said, by law you can't NOT let them come. I do routinely ask that if they must pick up during nap time to text me so I can have the child ready and quietly hand them out the door. If they are scheduled for a 5pm pick up and show up at 4:20 unannounced no big deal - but if you are going to wake up 4 other kids you need to let me know you are coming!!!
Michelle 06:17 AM 01-28-2012
We have an open door policy and welcome the parent to come anytime to pick up their child so they feel totally comfortable with me.
Nap time would be an issue though, especially if they ring the doorbell
Nap time would be an issue though, especially if they ring the doorbell
Meeko 03:38 PM 01-28-2012
Originally Posted by Michelle:
We have an open door policy and welcome the parent to come anytime to pick up their child so they feel totally comfortable with me.
Nap time would be an issue though, especially if they ring the doorbell
We have an "open door" policy too....except the door isn't open! We have an open door policy and welcome the parent to come anytime to pick up their child so they feel totally comfortable with me.
Nap time would be an issue though, especially if they ring the doorbell
Parents can pick up any time they like (although I discourage it at nap time).
However, my door is locked. Parents must respect that this is still a private home and they cannot wander in at will. If they can, so can a stranger. For the safety of THEIR children, the door is locked.
As for inspecting the day care...they can do that at interview time. They can inspect every single, individual lego if they want. Once their child is enrolled, they don't need to know what everyone else is doing, just their child. So parents are not allowed to wander around at will. If a parent wanted to see in our back classroom for example, they would be accompanied and allowed to peek in, but not enter while other children were in care.
Michelle 06:07 PM 01-28-2012
Originally Posted by Meeko60:
We have an "open door" policy too....except the door isn't open!
Parents can pick up any time they like (although I discourage it at nap time).
However, my door is locked. Parents must respect that this is still a private home and they cannot wander in at will. If they can, so can a stranger. For the safety of THEIR children, the door is locked.
As for inspecting the day care...they can do that at interview time. They can inspect every single, individual lego if they want. Once their child is enrolled, they don't need to know what everyone else is doing, just their child. So parents are not allowed to wander around at will. If a parent wanted to see in our back classroom for example, they would be accompanied and allowed to peek in, but not enter while other children were in care.
I totally agree! We have an "open door" policy too....except the door isn't open!
Parents can pick up any time they like (although I discourage it at nap time).
However, my door is locked. Parents must respect that this is still a private home and they cannot wander in at will. If they can, so can a stranger. For the safety of THEIR children, the door is locked.
As for inspecting the day care...they can do that at interview time. They can inspect every single, individual lego if they want. Once their child is enrolled, they don't need to know what everyone else is doing, just their child. So parents are not allowed to wander around at will. If a parent wanted to see in our back classroom for example, they would be accompanied and allowed to peek in, but not enter while other children were in care.
We do the same thing.
Nellie 04:19 AM 01-29-2012
I have my families just come on in the door. I can't hear the knocking and I really don't want them to have to wait out in the cold at drop off. On one occation I was the one who mess up when I read the schedule. I thought DCB was going to be here until 5 when he was actually getting picked up at 3. Normally I'm kind of listening for the door, but I wasn't that day. DCD started walking threw the house and scared the living crud out of me. I was screaming and jumping and started hyperventilating. He felt bad(wasn't his fault) and I felt stupid. He calls now even if he is going to be 15 mins early. I was surprised with the first phone call and he did state that he didn't want to scare me.
Sunchimes 07:13 AM 01-29-2012
One of mine is regular, one tries to be regular, but her job ending time can vary a little, so she's sometimes a little late (not a problem for me-part of the deal). the 3rd one can show up at any time. When she goes to work in the morning, she has no idea what she is going to be doing that day. Some days, she is finished in 2 hours, some days, she works 8 or 9. She pays for a full day, and if she only works 1/2 day, it's a bonus. If the drapes are open, she knows every is awake. If the drapes are closed, she knows someone is sleeping and knocks gently and tiptoes in.
I did finally have to put up a "Knock gently, baby sleeping" sign. Now, even the UPS man taps gently on the door.
I did finally have to put up a "Knock gently, baby sleeping" sign. Now, even the UPS man taps gently on the door.
Checkinkids.com 06:44 PM 01-31-2012
Some try to. But if it gets to be a problem, my wife tells them to at least call first so she can make a quiet exit if it's naptime.