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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Another Baby Question...Sorry Yall
Hunni Bee 03:37 PM 09-23-2013
I'm sorry for inundating all the boards with baby questions, but you all are the perfect audience for my questions. When I asked my mom, she was all "its not that hard and if you don't do it you'll ruin your baby"...so I don't like asking her things.

My 2 month olds schedule sucks. I go back to work in less than two weeks, and I need to fix it. Here's how it goes:

Her nighttime feedings are usually at 1, 4 and 7 am. She gets up for the day around 8:30. I change diaper, clothes, open curtains. We play, sing, eat...until about 11:30/12. Cranky, falls asleep. Cue sleeping ALL DAY. She wakes up for bottles and falls right back asleep. At about 7 pm she wakes up rarin' to go. I try to do sleepy things - book, bath, bottle. I usually get her to bed between 8:30 and 9, but she lies there awake and pulls her paci out and screams every ten minutes. Rinse and repeat til around 11.

Or variation: wakes up from afternoon nap around 3, falls back asleep around 6 and then wakes back up at bedtime. Wayyy worse than version 1.

Most people (like my mother) will say "just wake her up". She is extremely hard to wake up and even harder to keep up. If she is anywhere comfy she will sleep. If I put her somewhere not as comfy, like the bare carpet or in her bouncer, she just cries and cries. Taking her outside or on errands just makes her sleep more.

Basically if she wants to sleep and I try to keep her up, she screams. She doesn't like toys, so if you try to get play with her with them, she shuts down and sleeps or cries. Music, noise, light has no effect on her.

Is there anyway to reverse this in two weeks. I'm willing to work hard!!
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LoraJenkins 04:37 PM 09-23-2013
I remember those days with my last child. Up all night, slept all day no matter what I tried! And believe me, I tried making her stay awake during the day, it just left me with an over tired crying baby all night. She finally switched her schedule on her own at about 3 months old. Wish I could offer you some magical advice, but I can just sympathize
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Luvnmykidz 04:49 PM 09-23-2013
Sorry.. I dont have any advice either but I just continued trying to keep my kids up more in the day time and establish a bed time routine.. just like youre doing. by 3-4 months old it was magical.. They were on a really good schedule and it has continued on for years.
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Brooksie 05:19 PM 09-23-2013
She was premature right? My advice? Never wake a sleeping baby! At 2 months old (technically less if she is premature) there is no "getting her on a schedule". She makes the schedule because its what she needs. She will eventually adjust and figure out when is day and when is night. Try to keep her engaged during the day, run errands, play games with her, talk to her a lot when she is awake. When she is up at night keep it calm and quiet. She will start to realize nothing interesting goes on at night and that's when she should be sleeping. I've even heard not to turn on lights during night time changes. Literally get her up, feed her, change her, lay her back down and rub her head until she falls back asleep; All of this should still be done in the dark or with a small night light.

Besides that: GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK. You will NOT ruin your baby. You are giving her what she needs. Its just time and patience that you need. My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was (seriously) like 15 months old, even though a lot of that had to do with her allergies. And as far as a "schedule", she created her own and that wasn't until maybe 4-7 months. I can't remember exactly. Best advice is to feed her when she is hungry, let her sleep when she is tired, keep the lights low at night, and snuggle and lover her always. Good luck!
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jenn 05:29 PM 09-23-2013
Originally Posted by Brooksie:
She was premature right? My advice? Never wake a sleeping baby! At 2 months old (technically less if she is premature) there is no "getting her on a schedule". She makes the schedule because its what she needs. She will eventually adjust and figure out when is day and when is night. Try to keep her engaged during the day, run errands, play games with her, talk to her a lot when she is awake. When she is up at night keep it calm and quiet. She will start to realize nothing interesting goes on at night and that's when she should be sleeping. I've even heard not to turn on lights during night time changes. Literally get her up, feed her, change her, lay her back down and rub her head until she falls back asleep; All of this should still be done in the dark or with a small night light.

Besides that: GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK. You will NOT ruin your baby. You are giving her what she needs. Its just time and patience that you need. My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was (seriously) like 15 months old, even though a lot of that had to do with her allergies. And as far as a "schedule", she created her own and that wasn't until maybe 4-7 months. I can't remember exactly. Best advice is to feed her when she is hungry, let her sleep when she is tired, keep the lights low at night, and snuggle and lover her always. Good luck!
This exactly.
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melilley 07:32 PM 09-23-2013
Originally Posted by Brooksie:
She was premature right? My advice? Never wake a sleeping baby! At 2 months old (technically less if she is premature) there is no "getting her on a schedule". She makes the schedule because its what she needs. She will eventually adjust and figure out when is day and when is night. Try to keep her engaged during the day, run errands, play games with her, talk to her a lot when she is awake. When she is up at night keep it calm and quiet. She will start to realize nothing interesting goes on at night and that's when she should be sleeping. I've even heard not to turn on lights during night time changes. Literally get her up, feed her, change her, lay her back down and rub her head until she falls back asleep; All of this should still be done in the dark or with a small night light.

Besides that: GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK. You will NOT ruin your baby. You are giving her what she needs. Its just time and patience that you need. My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was (seriously) like 15 months old, even though a lot of that had to do with her allergies. And as far as a "schedule", she created her own and that wasn't until maybe 4-7 months. I can't remember exactly. Best advice is to feed her when she is hungry, let her sleep when she is tired, keep the lights low at night, and snuggle and lover her always. Good luck!
I agree! My ds is 14 months and still gets up at night sometimes. I have no idea why, he just does.
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Heidi 09:00 AM 09-24-2013
I'm going to say the opposite:

That being up from 8:30 to 11:30 is way too long for such a young baby, and that is causing her to sleep such long stretches later in the day.

If she's up at 8:30, her first nap should be at around 10:00. Even if she doesn't act tired then, try that for a few days and see if it helps. 1 1/2 hours is a decent stretch for a young baby to be stimulated. That would be a feeding, diaper change, a little play time on the floor, a cuddle with mom, and back to bed.

My 13 week old, full term dcb makes it an hour most of the time, then he's a train-wreck. I am actually working on stretching it, because he also wants to eat every 2 hours...and it takes him 45 minutes to finish a bottle and be satisfied.

Also, a lot of playing/light/stimulation may be a little too much for her little nervous system, which may be why she shuts down and sleeps. Try a little more low-key interactions. Not quite so bright, not quite so loud. See, in the evening YOU are tired and probably tend to be softer and quieter..which she's loving.
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Hunni Bee 09:16 AM 09-24-2013
Originally Posted by Heidi:
I'm going to say the opposite:

That being up from 8:30 to 11:30 is way too long for such a young baby, and that is causing her to sleep such long stretches later in the day.

If she's up at 8:30, her first nap should be at around 10:00. Even if she doesn't act tired then, try that for a few days and see if it helps. 1 1/2 hours is a decent stretch for a young baby to be stimulated. That would be a feeding, diaper change, a little play time on the floor, a cuddle with mom, and back to bed.

My 13 week old, full term dcb makes it an hour most of the time, then he's a train-wreck. I am actually working on stretching it, because he also wants to eat every 2 hours...and it takes him 45 minutes to finish a bottle and be satisfied.

Also, a lot of playing/light/stimulation may be a little too much for her little nervous system, which may be why she shuts down and sleeps. Try a little more low-key interactions. Not quite so bright, not quite so loud. See, in the evening YOU are tired and probably tend to be softer and quieter..which she's loving.
Very interesting. I never considered that she is being awake too long. It makes a lot of sense.

Aaaand, today I found out why she doesn't like toys - its because I dance them around in front of her, make them talk, etc. Today I just put her on my lap, put the toy in front of her and just sat there silently. Sure, enough she played, "talked to" and stared at it for about 15 minutes! I could have wept...

Yesterday she wouldn't even look at a toy.

So I think you may be right, Heidi. I'm still over stimulating her. I'll chill out

Thanks a ton, and to everyone else that posted.
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My3cents 09:24 AM 09-24-2013
Originally Posted by Brooksie:
She was premature right? My advice? Never wake a sleeping baby! At 2 months old (technically less if she is premature) there is no "getting her on a schedule". She makes the schedule because its what she needs. She will eventually adjust and figure out when is day and when is night. Try to keep her engaged during the day, run errands, play games with her, talk to her a lot when she is awake. When she is up at night keep it calm and quiet. She will start to realize nothing interesting goes on at night and that's when she should be sleeping. I've even heard not to turn on lights during night time changes. Literally get her up, feed her, change her, lay her back down and rub her head until she falls back asleep; All of this should still be done in the dark or with a small night light.

Besides that: GIVE YOURSELF A BREAK. You will NOT ruin your baby. You are giving her what she needs. Its just time and patience that you need. My daughter didn't sleep through the night until she was (seriously) like 15 months old, even though a lot of that had to do with her allergies. And as far as a "schedule", she created her own and that wasn't until maybe 4-7 months. I can't remember exactly. Best advice is to feed her when she is hungry, let her sleep when she is tired, keep the lights low at night, and snuggle and lover her always. Good luck!
I agree with above and she is little to have her on a schedule and I know that is hard for you- I would let her set the schedule but push towards the schedule you want her to have. You mom is right wake her up and play with her a little earlier then when she would normally get up. A good way to do that is undress her a bit, socks off, don't freeze her out of course but make her comfort stage a more playtime temp and less snuggle up like a bug. Preemie and such an infant you should go on her schedule. Enjoy! I know its a lot of work and hard esp when your trying to take care of others that are on a set time frame but it is only a short time they are little little. Make sure your getting help and taking care of you YOU! Daycare and never ending being needed is draining. Let others step in and help you, go out with the hub on a date night, do things that interest you- best advice I can give you........ Take care of you and your needs as a human being. Infants are a love like no other, taking care of Mom and her needs are essential.
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MNMum 02:02 PM 09-24-2013
Originally Posted by My3cents:
I agree with above and she is little to have her on a schedule and I know that is hard for you- I would let her set the schedule but push towards the schedule you want her to have. You mom is right wake her up and play with her a little earlier then when she would normally get up. A good way to do that is undress her a bit, socks off, don't freeze her out of course but make her comfort stage a more playtime temp and less snuggle up like a bug. Preemie and such an infant you should go on her schedule. Enjoy! I know its a lot of work and hard esp when your trying to take care of others that are on a set time frame but it is only a short time they are little little. Make sure your getting help and taking care of you YOU! Daycare and never ending being needed is draining. Let others step in and help you, go out with the hub on a date night, do things that interest you- best advice I can give you........ Take care of you and your needs as a human being. Infants are a love like no other, taking care of Mom and her needs are essential.
This
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Heidi 02:09 PM 09-24-2013
Hunni...

Here is a great resource for you. I am not ******** about any one school of thought, but Janet Lansbury trained with Magda Gerber at RIE, and she has some really cool stuff on her website.

Look it over and take away whatever makes sense to YOU.

http://www.janetlansbury.com/
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