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Old 11-22-2019, 07:40 AM
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Default New Daycare Child Not Adjusting At All

I have a new child who just started this week. I highly suspect he may be on the spectrum (my oldest son is high functioning), but heís just two. Heís never been in daycare but this seems like much more than that. He has meltdowns if heís not wearing red. Only wears his red shoes. Only paints with red. You get tre idea. We bought him red utensils, cup, bowl, plate, etc. to make him more comfortable but hehe still doesnít eat hardly at all.

It takes him a good hour to get to his default state. Which is just sad with periodic crying and asking about pickup with repetitive phrases all day. Instead of mostly playing and engaging with bouts of tears itís reversed.

He will sometimes play with cars and the racetrack, and tea set plates. Thatís it. Most of the time he wants to stand and look at the door. (Of course we redirect). Or he wants to sit next to you and not play st all.

He has no interest in initiating play or even responding to attempts to play from other kids. Heís very smart with an advanced vocabulary for his age. Heís also sweet. Heís just sad and it breaks my heart. He perks up some when itís almost pick up time and thatís about it. I can distract him for very short amounts of time only.

I asked his parents for ideas and most of them I canít do in a group setting as often as I would need to, as we canít go half an hour wirjhtojr repetitive pick up phrases happening. I canít give him stickers or let him color every time.

It takes him time with all transitions. For instance, it takes him a good half hour once getting in the playroom to play even with the cars/train he likes.

I thought about just telling them we canít do it. The crying gets everyone else down and it makes me sad that heís so sad. However, moving to a new place will be even harder for him. I do think heíd do better under one on one care by far. Preferably in his own home.

If things donít get better in a few weeks I may give them time to find that and be done. In the meantime though, what can I do? Please share any tips, tricks, strategies, etc we could try. I need to balance individual support with maintaining the group schedule and morale.

Thanks in advance!

Last edited by Michael; 11-22-2019 at 04:14 PM.
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Old 11-22-2019, 11:57 AM
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Ariana Ariana is online now
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Picture schedules work pretty well. Print them off and get him to move them for each 30 minute interval. You can google picture schedule. It might calm him to know what is coming next.

I would also require an assessment before continuing as you need professional support here. I have no issues with kids with ASD but they have to be diagnosed or in the process of being assessed. I canít support them on my own.
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Old 11-22-2019, 01:50 PM
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I would just try to let him get used to everything.His world has changed drastically . Maybe let him sit and watch things next to you.I often thought how strange it was that a child was dropped off with strangers. He has no idea his mom is coming back.He doesn't even know the other children.One day he was happily at home with his stuff,parents and even food.Then one day he is dropped off to a different house.A stranger and a bunch of noisy kids.It does take time to trust.Now the weekend is here and he will be home for a few days.I think its easier for infants,at two he is used to home.Give it time might take a month for him to make friends and trust everyone.How about fill a basket with a few toys and book .Let him sit next to you for awhile.May help him get used to everything Good luck.
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Old 11-22-2019, 02:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rosieteddy View Post
I would just try to let him get used to everything.His world has changed drastically . Maybe let him sit and watch things next to you.I often thought how strange it was that a child was dropped off with strangers. He has no idea his mom is coming back.He doesn't even know the other children.One day he was happily at home with his stuff,parents and even food.Then one day he is dropped off to a different house.A stranger and a bunch of noisy kids.It does take time to trust.Now the weekend is here and he will be home for a few days.I think its easier for infants,at two he is used to home.Give it time might take a month for him to make friends and trust everyone.How about fill a basket with a few toys and book .Let him sit next to you for awhile.May help him get used to everything Good luck.
You just perfectly described why I only enroll infants and raise them up, myself.
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Old 11-22-2019, 06:04 PM
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Play with the red thing... Give him a red square to sit on when hes feeling sad, a red a car. Point out to him "i have a red car to drive. would u like the red car?" May help him adjust. Mine was dinosaur boy (and totally autistic). we did everything with dinosaurs in some way (we ate spinach" like the dinosaurs", colored with the dinosaur on the table, peed like a dinosaur (ps dinosaurs in our world sit to pee).))
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