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  #1  
Old 02-21-2011, 07:53 AM
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gbcc gbcc is offline
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Default WWYD - Pacifier Issue

I have this little girl that will be 2 in June. She has not had a bottle or pacifier here in at least 7 months. Well I just found out that the parents have been giving her one or the other at home for naps and bedtime.

So here is the issue I am having. The girl sleeps 9:30 to 10:30 in the am and then noon to 2:30 in the pm. The mom doesn't think she is sleeping enough so she wants me to give her the pacifier so she stays asleep longer?? I'm very confused here. For an almost 2 year old I think that is plenty of nap time. also, if she hasn't had a pacifier... Why in the world would she want me to start??

Also this girl is very far behind. She does not communicate or try to communicate at all. She will say "pa" for please and up if you make her but thats it. She doesn't babble even. She is just mute most of the day. She will not help pick up or come when called. They had her hearing checked and it was fine. I did notice the parents do not make her speak or pick up at home. I am very concerned that the pacifier will stunt her growth even more. I feel that maybe the parents don't want her to grow up, which is turning out to be very unhealthy for this little girl. IMO

What are thoughts or advice on this?
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  #2  
Old 02-21-2011, 08:01 AM
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Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
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No.....I can't belive she is not embarrassed to admit that publicly.
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:11 AM
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I would continue as you are and give her as many skills as you can when she is in your care. It sounds to me like the parents just can't see. You are with her long enough to have an impact.
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:09 AM
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Kids don't get pacis past 12 months here. I have a 2.5 year old boy that I know still gets the paci at home, but he is fine w/o it here.

I do away with the morning nap by 18 months here. That sounds like way too much napping for a 2yo.
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:13 AM
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I too think its too much nap for a 2 yr old. Also, I would start to make her talk. I don't allow the other kids to speak for a child either I have a feeling that no one talks to her at home so she just kinda does her own thing. My dd was in speech for several years. I don't do sign language so I would make the child talk. Like instead of grunting I would tell them to use their words, and make them repeat you. If they say something, say the word correctly and have them repeat it.
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:18 AM
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I would start using sign language with her and if you have any TV time during the day and a good library, try to get the Signing Time DVDs. All kids can benefit from learning sign language and it's a big help to toddlers!

Not picking up at 2 isn't a red flag to me because I don't even TRY to get them to help pick up that young--not a popular stance, but I just don't see the need until they're old enough to really understand. I model it for them and get spontaneous help, but I in no way expect it.

Not responding to her name and the other speech issues are a HUGE red flag for me; by two she should be communicating much more than that. Sign with her but don't FORCE her to speak/sign back--encourage it, but mostly just model it for her.

That doesn't sound like too much nap for a not-quite two--one of my 2's routinely naps for 3-3.5 hours and still sleeps well during the night. I would NOT give her a paci to sleep longer, but I might start shortening the morning nap to get her to one nap a day.
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:30 AM
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Ok Thanks! Just wanted to make sure I wasn't expecting too much. I have 2 other children in care. All 3 are just 2 weeks apart. The other two will repeat after me and if they whine or grunt I stand there until the words come out. This one just stares at me. Thats it. No whining, no grunting just stares.

Is she too young to worry about signs of autism
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:35 AM
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Originally Posted by gbcc View Post
Ok Thanks! Just wanted to make sure I wasn't expecting too much. I have 2 other children in care. All 3 are just 2 weeks apart. The other two will repeat after me and if they whine or grunt I stand there until the words come out. This one just stares at me. Thats it. No whining, no grunting just stares.

Is she too young to worry about signs of autism
No, she's not too young. It definitely sounds like she might have a speech delay and it's possible there are other things going on as well. Have you brought your concerns up to her parents?
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Old 02-21-2011, 08:36 AM
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No binkies here for any age.

I would be happy to give her a longer nap though.
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Old 02-21-2011, 09:01 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SilverSabre25 View Post
I would start using sign language with her and if you have any TV time during the day and a good library, try to get the Signing Time DVDs. All kids can benefit from learning sign language and it's a big help to toddlers!

Not picking up at 2 isn't a red flag to me because I don't even TRY to get them to help pick up that young--not a popular stance, but I just don't see the need until they're old enough to really understand. I model it for them and get spontaneous help, but I in no way expect it.

Not responding to her name and the other speech issues are a HUGE red flag for me; by two she should be communicating much more than that. Sign with her but don't FORCE her to speak/sign back--encourage it, but mostly just model it for her.

That doesn't sound like too much nap for a not-quite two--one of my 2's routinely naps for 3-3.5 hours and still sleeps well during the night. I would NOT give her a paci to sleep longer, but I might start shortening the morning nap to get her to one nap a day.


I would NOT use sign language! It will give her & her parents an excuse to not make her speak! She needs to learn how to talk. That is ridoulous to use sign language. Make her use words for what she wants or she cant get what she wants until she can say the word. Also, 2 yr olds are old enough to learn how to pick up toys. They need to learn at a young age to do little things like simply picking up some toys. Also, napping is individuale to the child. Maybe she needs more sleep,but would not give her a pacifer.
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Old 02-21-2011, 09:07 AM
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I would NOT use sign language! It will give her & her parents an excuse to not make her speak! She needs to learn how to talk. That is ridoulous to use sign language. Make her use words for what she wants or she cant get what she wants until she can say the word. Also, 2 yr olds are old enough to learn how to pick up toys. They need to learn at a young age to do little things like simply picking up some toys. Also, napping is individuale to the child. Maybe she needs more sleep,but would not give her a pacifer.
Oh for the love of pete!!! Using sign language does NOT interfere with their ability to learn to speak, and if she does have speech delays then it will HELP her learn to communicate. There is TONS of research supporting the use of sign language in early childhood environments with both neurotypical children and those with delays and research that I know of that suggests that it it not okay. Even children who speak and are developing normally benefit from learning sign at a young age--it gives them the tools they need to communicate before they are physically able to.

You can't FORCE a child to speak who isn't ready to, and you can do more harm than good by trying! When you teach a sign, you speak the word and make the sign at the same time and therefore are presenting both simultaneously--it in no way interferes with talking to the child or teaching them the spoken words for things. Signing is STILL communicating, and that's what's important at this stage.
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Old 02-21-2011, 10:57 AM
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I would NOT use sign language! It will give her & her parents an excuse to not make her speak! She needs to learn how to talk. That is ridoulous to use sign language. Make her use words for what she wants or she cant get what she wants until she can say the word. Also, 2 yr olds are old enough to learn how to pick up toys. They need to learn at a young age to do little things like simply picking up some toys. Also, napping is individuale to the child. Maybe she needs more sleep,but would not give her a pacifer.
You think sign language is ridoulous???? You are wrong!! Sign language is used everday probably by every provider. When we sing "when your happy and you know it" we use our fingers to our face and make a smile. When we sing "The wheels on the bus" we use our hands to this song. hummmm

And you can not MAKE her use words for what she wants. That would be cruel not to give her what she wants till she says the word.
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