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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Awkward situation...Help
organicdclady 06:07 PM 06-26-2015
Hi everyone, I need some advice on an awkward situation...and fast would be great. I have one dcg who is one of only two full timers. She has been coming for the past 3 or 4 months. She is SA and I did not raise her rate when school got out, felt bad for dad who is a newly single parent. Dad told me she was going on vaca with grandma sometime this summer. Never gave exact dates-I tried to ask and he kept saying he wasn't sure. I just told him not to worry, I don;t really need to know. Last Friday he informs me she is leaving and will be her last day for two week. This week goes by and he didn't pay-I guess I just assumed he would bring a check by-per the contract he signed, and info from handbook, everywhere it says the payment is not for care, but for the spot. They are expected to pay whether they come or not.
Anyway texted him today and asked if I should email an invoice so he can pay online-he replied back with "sure that would be fine" I could tell from that text he isn't happy. oh well. a minute later he texts "she wasn't at daycare this week. Right?" I went ahead an sent the invoice and haven't responded to the text.
I am new, only opened about 6 months ago. I do not want conflict, don't want to lose him either, but I need that money. I can't let it go. What should I say? Anything? Or just see if he says anything back? Or will he even pay it?
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Baby Beluga 06:23 PM 06-26-2015
I would say something along the lines of "Yes, DCD, DCG was not here last week however per your signed contract tuition is due regardless of attendance. Please refer to page X of your contract for this information"
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Nisaryn 06:24 PM 06-26-2015
I would remind him that he signed a contract and that your contract states that he must pay in order to hold a spot in the daycare. I can understand feeling bad for him but if he knew that it was required and is expecting you to "give him a break" based on the situation then I would gently remind him again that you need to be paid so that he knows your not going to back down, otherwise he might need to consider sending his child somewhere else.
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LovetheSun 06:31 PM 06-26-2015
You need to respect your own rules!

As a lot of people say if you don't respect your rules, the parents will eat you up and ask more and more of you.

If you don't apply your rule, he might go on vacation again and decide not to pay. Imagine if other parents find out...

Did you take a deposit at enrollment? I would advise to pay a deposit that you apply to the last week of attendance if a 2 weeks notice is given. (even if is just $100 most people will not want to lose that money!) I charge full full weeks deposit at enrollment.
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organicdclady 06:57 PM 06-26-2015
Thank you all. That was the boost I needed-I texted him back. Nervous about his reply-but I have to enforce the rules-you're all right. I had the other full timer on vaca last two weeks and they did pay prior to going.
I did collect a deposit from him. The other issue is that was some miscommunication with him in the beginning and he has been paying the Friday after care, instead of before. It wasn't really a big deal, until now. We could have had this conversation face to face instead of through text. I am having a hard time overcoming having to ask for money. For some reason it makes me embarrassed and feel ashamed. I know I need to get over that real quick so I don't get taken advantage of...
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organicdclady 07:06 PM 06-26-2015
What I meant was-contract requests that a week is prepaid. He actually pays at the end of the week, after the care takes place. If I would have made that more clear, I would have asked him last Friday for payment even though she was going on vaca. The thing I did not realize upon opening is that there is such a learning curve. I worked in a large hdc for years before I decided to open. I saw the director getting walked all over left and right. It bothered me and I would tell her she needed to stand up for herself. Now I realize why she never would. It is hard to potentially make a parent upset when you essentially depend on them to survive.
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Josiegirl 04:14 AM 06-27-2015
I've been doing this forever and asking for what is owed me is still one of the hardest things to do. Don't ask me why cause I have no clue. I'm a people pleaser and don't want to make anyone angry, upset, mad, etc., at me. BUT this is your paycheck, your living, if you don't request it for yourself there isn't anyone else who's going to do it. Was dcd not understanding the policies? Was it dcm who paid attention and he just went with it? If it was signed they should know.

Yes, you already know you need to stand behind your own handbook, from past experience. Be assertive. YOU can do it!!! We've got your back!!

I've found, at least with my own dcfs, they just need a gentle reminder, as if they'd forgotten.
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Josiegirl 04:19 AM 06-27-2015
A member on here(cannot remember who) said the way they start off an awkward situation is to come right out and say "This is uncomfortable for me to bring up but....". I'm keeping that in mind for future use. It's honest and opens the door for an awkward confrontation.
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organicdclady 10:17 AM 06-27-2015
Thank you Josie, I am happy I found this forum. I haven't posted much but I read posts almost everyday and it really helps with everything from to day to day to sticky situations. I have found a lot of confidence just through reading everyone's stories and experiences.
As for this situation with dcd, he ended up paying the invoice this morning but didn't text me back last night after I reminded him about the contract that he signed. Dcg mom passed away in January, dad travels for work and ended up in my city in February (or about). He enrolled on a Sunday and she started the next day. I think the whole experience is new to him so I've been really lenient and tried to help out as much as possible.
I'm glad I found my backbone and forced the issue of payment. Otherwise, I'd probably be in hysterics right now. House payment is due in just a few days-you know how it goes!
Thank tou for taking the time to reply. You have no ideas how appreciated it is. Knowing there are so many people out there who have been through this and willing to lend a hand or a voice is amazing.
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