hsdcmama 07:31 AM 01-14-2016
I have a dcb who will be 3 next month. I have had him since he was 10 months old. The older he has gotten, the worse his behavior has become. Pushing/hitting other kids, breaking things, throwing toys, lying, and this morning I caught him peeling off the caulk around my window frames. When I walked out to the living room, I could see him peeking out of the corner of his eye to make sure I wasn't watching as he did it. He does this all the time, doing things he knows full well he is not supposed to do, and then waiting till I turn my back to do them. His 6-year-old sister is sneaky in the same way. That kind of defiance really, REALLY bugs me. When my own kids did it, I nipped it in the bud immediately because I have no tolerance for it. I have been very consistent with discipline in dcb's case as well, but it has not been helping at all; he just continues to misbehave all day every day, and it's been going on for months. I have spoken to his parents several times about it, asked on different occasions if there was anything different or troublesome going on at home, etc. and they always say it's nothing going on at home & they don't know why he's behaving badly. Then I heard from mom in casual conversation that dad won't discipline him, and that he actually yells at mom for disciplining him and his sister!
I have had this family since the day I opened, and I really can't afford to lose them. But I feel like the inconsistent discipline at home/ dad undermining the mom's discipline is teaching the kids that they don't have to follow the rules, and they are making my days miserable (they are here 6:30-5 Monday-Friday, so it literally is every day). How am I supposed to combat the bad behavior here at my house, when their parents are not on board? I truly am at a loss, bc it's become clear that the situation at home is not going to change, and I don't have it in me to entertain "spoiled brat" behavior in my house.
rosieteddy 07:47 AM 01-14-2016
Three year old should get it.He is acting up on purpose.I had a playspace -walk in playpen.We called it the club house.If the child can not behave he would be in there with a toy until I could keep him in sight.The sibling would sit at a table if she would not behave.These children do not deserve freedom to pick and choose their activities.I spent a lot of time walking outside around block and playing outside to tire them out when they misbehaved inside.
Ariana 10:02 AM 01-14-2016
Time for him to become your shadow. Force him to follow you wherever you go. Explain why it's happening. "unfortunately you will have to stay with me today all day. I thought you were a big boy but I guess I was wrong. Whenever I leave the playroom you are doing XYZ". After a few hours ask him if he wants another chance. Give him a chance and then he becomes your shadow for the rest of the day after he tests you...which he will. Give him another chance the next day etc etc. until he stops. The goal is for him t become SUPER bored following you around so do it for as long as this takes.