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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>UGHHHHH!!!!! Really ill This Morning...
gkids09 07:41 AM 09-14-2011
One of my assistants quit two weeks ago today, and my new one started yesterday. She was FABULOUS. She sits down in the floor and plays with the kids, and is really really patient with them. Obviously she had to be fingerprinted and background checked, and everything was clear. Not to mention I know the girl, and know she's a decent person.

One of my daycare parents came in this morning and saw her. When the assistant walked into the other room with a kid, dcm said "Is SHE working here now??" I said, "Yes, she is, and she's really good. Your kids love her." dcm says "Call me later and I'll tell you about her."

Umm, NO. I don't care what you think about her because you went to high school with her. I DO NOT care. How do I say this NICELY to dcm when she comes to pick up dck this afternoon??

I feel like this dcm tries to control what I do, and I never let her, but this is almost too much for me to handle. YES she's working HERE, and NO I'm not going to fire her when she's great with the kids just because you don't like her!!!!!
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nannyde 07:43 AM 09-14-2011
What does your assistant say about how she knows the Mom?

I would hear the Mom out. You can't be harmed by her information.
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gkids09 07:46 AM 09-14-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
What does your assistant say about how she knows the Mom?

I would hear the Mom out. You can't be harmed by her information.

Assistant says last time she saw her, they were in high school, and they haven't had contact since then (not even "friends" on facebook! ) High school was YEARS ago...

If the dcm says anything to me this afternoon, I'll listen, but I'm not going to call her just so she can tell me why she doesn't like her. (dcm was one of the "popular" girls in high school, and assistant wasn't, so I am honestly thinking it's just because they were in different crowds and didn't see eye to eye on things.)
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nannyde 08:54 AM 09-14-2011
Originally Posted by gkids09:
Assistant says last time she saw her, they were in high school, and they haven't had contact since then (not even "friends" on facebook! ) High school was YEARS ago...

If the dcm says anything to me this afternoon, I'll listen, but I'm not going to call her just so she can tell me why she doesn't like her. (dcm was one of the "popular" girls in high school, and assistant wasn't, so I am honestly thinking it's just because they were in different crowds and didn't see eye to eye on things.)
I would listen to her though. I know you sound weary because feel controled BUT... information is good. Her opinion may not weigh an ounce with you but it's in your best interest to hear her out.

You can listen without giving any reaction at all. Just repeat back to her what she is saying to make sure you are hearing what she is really saying and then give yourself time to think about it.
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melskids 09:05 AM 09-14-2011
i live in a small town, about 2000. EVERYONE knows everyone, except for me of course, cause i'm the newbie.

every time someone new comes along, all the other parents feel the need to tell me about it.

i have heard it all, from drug use to tax fraud to homewrecking women.

if i judged everyone based on what i hear about them, i wouldnt have ANY clients.

but i listen. not to judge, or to gossip. only to help me be a little cautious about who im going to trust. because sometimes, as it turns out, it isnt the drug addict tax evasive homewrecker i need to avoid. its the big mouth gossip.
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gkids09 09:07 AM 09-14-2011
I definitely understand what you're saying...I will hear her out, and see what she has to say. EVERY time I've ever gotten a new employee, she has found SOMETHING wrong with them (she's too loud, she's too quiet, she's not pretty, etc etc etc). I guess that's why I don't want to hear her complaints.

I hired this girl and put an ad in the newspaper all at the same time, just in case it didn't work out. I am prepared for it not to, but she sure does seem great so far. I guess I just don't want to be disappointed after being so impressed with her!

Thanks for the advice though. I will see what she has to say and go from there...
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gkids09 09:11 AM 09-14-2011
Originally Posted by melskids:
i live in a small town, about 2000. EVERYONE knows everyone, except for me of course, cause i'm the newbie.

every time someone new comes along, all the other parents feel the need to tell me about it.

i have heard it all, from drug use to tax fraud to homewrecking women.

if i judged everyone based on what i hear about them, i wouldnt have ANY clients.

but i listen. not to judge, or to gossip. only to help me be a little cautious about who im going to trust. because sometimes, as it turns out, it isnt the drug addict tax evasive homewrecker i need to avoid. its the big mouth gossip.

Sounds EXACTLY like where I live!! Thanks!!

It's kind of funny actually...I was venting to my mom about it this morning, and she said if we were all judged by some of the things we did in high school, most of us wouldn't have jobs! dcm had a BAD BAD reputation in high school, so my assistant may have been thinking some thoughts about her when she walked in the door.

I'm going to hear her out, but I'm not going to take it very seriously unless it's something MAJOR.
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Meeko 10:06 AM 09-14-2011
Sounds like DCM has issues! Unless she tells you that your new assistant is a serial killer....despite passing background checks.......just ignore her high school drama.
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gkids09 08:10 AM 09-15-2011
HAHAHAHA

Turns out, dcm tried to.....umm...."get" with assistant's husband a few years ago. They were going to lunch secretly, and assistant confronted her about it, so it stopped. dcm came in yesterday saying that she was bi-polar because she went off on her for going to eat with her husband...uhhh....DUH!!

Anyway, dcm said "Is she good?" And I told her how good she has done so far. This morning, same dcm came in and said ds told her last night that he "likes the new girl."

Guess she changed her mind about her...
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Blackcat31 08:16 AM 09-15-2011
Originally Posted by gkids09:
HAHAHAHA

Turns out, dcm tried to.....umm...."get" with assistant's husband a few years ago. They were going to lunch secretly, and assistant confronted her about it, so it stopped. dcm came in yesterday saying that she was bi-polar because she went off on her for going to eat with her husband...uhhh....DUH!!

Anyway, dcm said "Is she good?" And I told her how good she has done so far. This morning, same dcm came in and said ds told her last night that he "likes the new girl."

Guess she changed her mind about her...
Now THAT is funny!!!

Well atleast it was worth a laugh to hear her out!
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laundrymom 11:14 AM 09-15-2011
Lol. This is so funny!!!
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erinalexmom 11:17 AM 09-15-2011
If someone tries to "get with' my dh then I would totally go "bi-polar" on her butt!
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Tags:assistant, conferences, gossipping parents, parent - conversation, references
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