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  #1  
Old 03-04-2013, 10:37 AM
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Default Do You Ever Feel Like There Is Too Much Togetherness?

I started doing daycare again a few years ago after my twins were born. I love doing daycare and my families, the problem is with my own kids, specifically my 4 year old boys. Lately it feels like all the boys do is fight, which then gets me involved and then it seems like a viscous cycle of us all arguing all day. I love them and want to be home with them, but lately I've been wondering if the problem is that we're spending too much time together. Essentially we're together 24/7, the boys even share a room, so they get no space from each other. I'm to the point where I'm considering going back to work and sending them to school to see if some separation improves the situation. And no these are not he took this or he did that fights, they're knock down drag out trying to beat each other up kind of fights. I'm just at my wits end and don't know what else to do. Any advice other than the normal rewards charts, taking just 1 on an errand, losing privileges, cause my hubs and I have tried it all. I almost think they hate me doing daycare
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Old 03-04-2013, 10:41 AM
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will they be starting kindergarten in the fall?

I am finding that the last 9ish months before kindergarten are HARD. Heck, a year ago I was already having awful problems with my DD and I didn't even know yet that she was going to go to kindergarten! Kindy solved the problems beautifully.

If they aren't going to kindy, then perhaps a preschool?

I do think there is such a thing as too much togetherness; parents and kids need space from each other sometimes.
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Old 03-04-2013, 10:41 AM
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I had a really hard time with my kids when they were the age of the kids I watch because they got on my nerves and I let them because they were my kids. now they are older and its gotten better. they arent here most of they day and that helps!
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Old 03-04-2013, 10:54 AM
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My two youngest sons are AWFUL to each other when they don't get enough space. If possible, can you send one to his room for alone time, and the other stay with you, then switch? Or one go to the family room and the other to his room? "Ok, I see you two can't play nicely, now you have to be separated." My ds (4) said "FINALLY!" yesterday when I said that to them. I'm dumbfounded that if he WANTED to play alone, why didn't he just go DO THAT? ACK!
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Old 03-04-2013, 11:04 AM
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They won't start kindergarten until fall 2014. I've looked into some local preschools, but the cost is ridiculous. There is a chance that they could get into the 1/2 day program at the local school, but I won't know until at least the end of sept/beginning of oct.

Up until this past oct I only had infants in care and there was never a problem. Since the 3 year old started in oct their bad behaviors have escalated, whether its coincidence or not, I don't know. I will admit this particular child requires a lot of my attention, more so than the infants at times.

I'm just trying to figure out what's best for us all right now.
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Old 03-04-2013, 11:09 AM
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I sent both my kids to a PT preschool a few days a week. And I agree that school seems to have solved the problems
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Old 03-04-2013, 11:11 AM
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I have tried sending 1 to their room, but they constantly call for the other to come play with them. They love to go at it like cats and dogs, but they hate to be apart, I don't know if that's a twin thing or what? Maybe I'll just force them to be apart for a while when they are really going at it and see if that helps.
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Old 03-04-2013, 11:16 AM
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My husband and I both really want to send them to preschool, but the public pre-k takes lower income kids before anybody else, including children with disabilities. We've applied, but won't know if there's a spot for them until after school starts in the fall. I really have a problem with the public schools turning away kids with disabilities or because their parents make too much money Anyways that only leaves us the church preschools, which are great, but my boys would still be in the same class, I really want them separated, and they're super expensive
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Old 03-04-2013, 11:19 AM
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You can talk to the church and let them know your financial situation and they may cut the costs for you. Is there a church you go to that has a preschool.
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