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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>OT- My Own DD Evening Dilema
Alice Of Legend 06:53 AM 10-23-2012
My DD, 11mos, is a great baby and generally really happy. The only time we really struggle is in the evening after bath. I'm at my wits end and I'm wondering if you guys have any advice.
She's happy all evening & loves her bath but the second we step out of the bathroom she turns into a monster. Screaming and crying to the point that the dog hides and I have to go around and close all the windows (when it was nice out at least) because it sounds like we're beating her but what's really happening is putting her diaper, onesie, and pjs on. She's had a cold recently so we've had to use the bulb syringe on her nose which makes the screaming worse. Its been 3 months of this and I'm not sure what to do to make the transition easier. I usually ignore the screaming and get her dressed as fast as I can but that's not helping. I tried starting our routine earlier thinking maybe she was over tired and also tried doing her bottle 1st (usually bath, bottle, book, bed) thinking she was getting really hungry maybe but neither made any difference. Lately she doesn't like diaper changes (or getting dressed) in general but she just fidgets and whines, it's nothing like the evening.
She's happy all evening & loves her bath but the second we step out of the bathroom she turns into a monster. Screaming and crying to the point that the dog hides and I have to go around and close all the windows (when it was nice out at least) because it sounds like we're beating her but what's really happening is putting her diaper, onesie, and pjs on. She's had a cold recently so we've had to use the bulb syringe on her nose which makes the screaming worse. Its been 3 months of this and I'm not sure what to do to make the transition easier. I usually ignore the screaming and get her dressed as fast as I can but that's not helping. I tried starting our routine earlier thinking maybe she was over tired and also tried doing her bottle 1st (usually bath, bottle, book, bed) thinking she was getting really hungry maybe but neither made any difference. Lately she doesn't like diaper changes (or getting dressed) in general but she just fidgets and whines, it's nothing like the evening.
daycarediva 06:57 AM 10-23-2012
I am assuming she has made the connection between being done with bath=going to bed and is protesting that. I have no advice, just sympathetic ((((HUGS))))
JenNJ 06:58 AM 10-23-2012
I find white noise machines/CDs to be very soothing to event he most upset babies at transition times. Have you tried talking her through the steps?
"DD, we are going to take a nice relaxing bath. After that, we will get into our comfy PJs and read a story while we have our bottle. then we will lay down and close our eyes for bedtime." And repeat the steps before and as they are happening. Sometimes a calm, monotone voice explaining things can help.
"DD, we are going to take a nice relaxing bath. After that, we will get into our comfy PJs and read a story while we have our bottle. then we will lay down and close our eyes for bedtime." And repeat the steps before and as they are happening. Sometimes a calm, monotone voice explaining things can help.
Lyss 07:06 AM 10-23-2012
Originally Posted by JenNJ:
I find white noise machines/CDs to be very soothing to event he most upset babies at transition times. Have you tried talking her through the steps?
"DD, we are going to take a nice relaxing bath. After that, we will get into our comfy PJs and read a story while we have our bottle. then we will lay down and close our eyes for bedtime." And repeat the steps before and as they are happening. Sometimes a calm, monotone voice explaining things can help.
I think the music is a good idea, Maybe try a different locationI find white noise machines/CDs to be very soothing to event he most upset babies at transition times. Have you tried talking her through the steps?
"DD, we are going to take a nice relaxing bath. After that, we will get into our comfy PJs and read a story while we have our bottle. then we will lay down and close our eyes for bedtime." And repeat the steps before and as they are happening. Sometimes a calm, monotone voice explaining things can help.
nanglgrl 07:09 AM 10-23-2012
I know it's been three months so these might not even be things to think about but i'll throw them out there just in case. Is it possible she has a minor ear infection and the water is causing some pain? Or do you use any bubble baths or soap on her private parts? This could cause discomfort in some kids. I agree though that she is probably just associating it with going to bed.
Alice Of Legend 07:10 AM 10-23-2012
Originally Posted by JenNJ:
I find white noise machines/CDs to be very soothing to event he most upset babies at transition times. Have you tried talking her through the steps?
"DD, we are going to take a nice relaxing bath. After that, we will get into our comfy PJs and read a story while we have our bottle. then we will lay down and close our eyes for bedtime." And repeat the steps before and as they are happening. Sometimes a calm, monotone voice explaining things can help.
We've tried talking through it. DH does bath time and he usually tries to prepare her for the transition by letting her know bath is almost over, he gets her towel ready a little before so she sees it, he lets her pull the drain and watch the water go down and then he gets her out (at which point she's still OK). The screaming starts the second we walk through the bathroom door.I find white noise machines/CDs to be very soothing to event he most upset babies at transition times. Have you tried talking her through the steps?
"DD, we are going to take a nice relaxing bath. After that, we will get into our comfy PJs and read a story while we have our bottle. then we will lay down and close our eyes for bedtime." And repeat the steps before and as they are happening. Sometimes a calm, monotone voice explaining things can help.
I didn't think of the music/white noise. She loves her music and the white noise works great at nap so I'll have to give that a try.
JenNJ 07:24 AM 10-23-2012
Originally Posted by Alice Of Legend:
We've tried talking through it. DH does bath time and he usually tries to prepare her for the transition by letting her know bath is almost over, he gets her towel ready a little before so she sees it, he lets her pull the drain and watch the water go down and then he gets her out (at which point she's still OK). The screaming starts the second we walk through the bathroom door.
I didn't think of the music/white noise. She loves her music and the white noise works great at nap so I'll have to give that a try.
She may extra sensitive to the cold after a bath. Maybe bring her PJs into the bathroom and get her dressed in there in the warm, humid air before taking her into another room. My kids are 4 & 6 and we still do this because they get cold easily and HATE being chilly!We've tried talking through it. DH does bath time and he usually tries to prepare her for the transition by letting her know bath is almost over, he gets her towel ready a little before so she sees it, he lets her pull the drain and watch the water go down and then he gets her out (at which point she's still OK). The screaming starts the second we walk through the bathroom door.
I didn't think of the music/white noise. She loves her music and the white noise works great at nap so I'll have to give that a try.
spud912 07:48 AM 10-23-2012
I just wanted to give some sympathy. My older dd never liked getting her diaper changed (starting around 4 months old). She would scream bloody murder every time and it was a huge "event" every.single.time!!! The only thing that got her out of that was potty training, but to this day, she has to go to the bathroom on her own terms. If I send her to go potty, she still throws a huge fit (at 3 1/2 years old!!).
I don't have any advice since nothing really worked for us. I agree with the others, change her into pj's in the bathroom and give her something to look at and hold while you're dressing her.
I don't have any advice since nothing really worked for us. I agree with the others, change her into pj's in the bathroom and give her something to look at and hold while you're dressing her.
Cat Herder 08:02 AM 10-23-2012
You could also try doing her baths in the mornings, instead of evenings, for a bit to help narrow down the issue. 
Obviously if the morning bath presents no issues for her, it will point to other things to rule out.
Obviously if the morning bath presents no issues for her, it will point to other things to rule out.
Loveyoustinkyface 08:14 AM 10-23-2012
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
You could also try doing her baths in the mornings, instead of evenings, for a bit to help narrow down the issue.
Obviously if the morning bath presents no issues for her, it will point to other things to rule out.
Great idea~ I was going to suggest bathing her before dinner. Bathtime stimulates my children! It does NOT help them wind down for sleep.You could also try doing her baths in the mornings, instead of evenings, for a bit to help narrow down the issue.
Obviously if the morning bath presents no issues for her, it will point to other things to rule out.
cheerfuldom 11:41 AM 10-23-2012
sounds like she has decided to use post bath time as her power struggle. really every kid picks something. some kids are horrendous at the table, some act like animals when you try and put them in the car seat, some have the clothes issue.
I might try a few things but after that, just ignore it and continue on with the plan. its not like bath, clothing or bedtime are optional. no kid is going to be happily cooperative at every moment of the day
I might try a few things but after that, just ignore it and continue on with the plan. its not like bath, clothing or bedtime are optional. no kid is going to be happily cooperative at every moment of the day
iheartkids 11:49 AM 10-23-2012
I think some kids are hyper sensitive about being naked. Maybe she doesn't like this feeling. Try wrapping her up in a big towel and snuggle with her before getting her dressed. When my ds was a baby I would dry him off then wrap a really soft warm blanket around him and just hug and cuddle with him for a few minutes before getting him dressed.