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Unregistered 11:21 AM 01-08-2020
At what age should a child be able to be laid down for nap and not scream/cry excessively until they fall asleep? I have a 19 month old who immediately stands up after I put him down for nap and proceeds to scream and cry until he falls asleep. He almost always wakes doing the same thing. All other children I have in care, including a 13 month old either lay quietly or babble until they fall asleep. Do the same when they wake.
I will be asking mom today at pickup (again) to very specifically tell me how they handle this at home. In the past mom has said that he doesn't really do that for them, but I have a hard time believing that since it is an every day occurrence here. She has mentioned that they go in and reassure him that everything is okay and rub his back. I have tried this, but have found it only prolongs the screaming. I feel like when go in, he is expecting to be picked up then gets even more upset when that doesn't happen.
I guess I am needing advice as to what I can say to mom. Is it normal for some kids to still do this at this age or more of a learned behavior?
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Unregistered 12:34 PM 01-08-2020
Learned behavior! Going to be hard to change at his age. I'm willing to bet they co-sleep at home. This is the exact reason I don't enroll children who co-sleep.
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Ariana 02:47 PM 01-08-2020
The parents are being evasive with you. He doesn’t cry with them because they pick him up. You will basically need to sleep train him. Just ignore him until he falls asleep and keep doing it until he stops screaming, which he will eventually. I have had to sleep train many kids over the years and it usually takes a few days but eventually he will be like the other kids. Chances are the parents either cosleep or get him up when he makes any sounds.
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Snowmom 03:09 PM 01-08-2020
How long have you had him?

I've had several new enrollees act this way.
Only 1 never adapted to the daycare nap expectations. It usually takes 2-3 weeks (of FT enrollment!) to fall into routine.

It sounds like you're being honest with how it's progressing at daycare. I'd continue that and let the parents know what they CAN do to help ease their child's stress at daycare (because it IS causing him stress). Give them education (handouts) about safe sleep practices, self soothing techniques, etc. That can help!
If it were me, I'd have a deadline in mind though. If I don't see improvement in a specific timeframe, I will let them go. It's too stressful for everyone involved to have a screaming child disrupting rest time for everyone. Not healthy!
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Unregistered 11:11 AM 01-09-2020
I have had him since he was an infant. He has never gone down easily. He screams for 10-20 minutes every day before falling asleep.
I talked to mom about it again yesterday and asked her what their routine is at home. She told me that each night they brush teeth, put pjs on, read a story and then tell him its time for bed. Dad puts him down and he cries no more than a minute. She suggested that maybe he is having nightmares here when he wakes screaming? I told her I really doubt this considering that he screams himself to sleep each day as well.
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Tags:co-sleeping, co-sleeping and daycare, mats, milestones, naptime - screamer, won't sleep
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