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EchoMom 10:50 AM 09-08-2014
Do you have any children with severe speech delays/disorders?

If so, do the severe speech errors bother you?

Do you worry about the influence on your own child?



I currently have infants and 4 preschool age children (including my son). Myself and my assisstant (my mom). I've never had this problem so bad but now I have high percentage of children with severe articulation disorder. My own son just turned 3 and speaks very well. Another child his exact age also speaks perfectly. But the other 2 children are almost 4 and both diagnosed with severe articulation disorder that makes 90% of their speech unintelligible.

The well spoken child has been with me 1.5years. One of the delayed children has been here since 24 months so 2 years. The other delayed child has only been here a few weeks and didn't talk enough at the interview to notice.

The long term child has sometimes bitten and scratched out of communication frustration but has mostly grown out of that acting out. The new child is very well behaved. But both BUTCHER everything they say and neither are receiving any intervention.

I know it's not nice to say but now lIstening to TWO severe speech disorders makes my ears bleed and drives me BANANAS. Would it concern anyone else for your young 3 year old to be listening to 2 out of 3 peers speak so unintelligibly for 40-50 hours a week?

Please don't underestimate how severe the articulation disorders are. Really an outsider does NOT understand anything these 2 (unrelated) children say. The only reason we can understand some is because we spend so many hours a week listening to it.
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TwinKristi 10:51 AM 09-08-2014
I'm dealing with this right now. I have 2 delayed talkers/learners and it can be tough. I just posted in the members only area about it.
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EchoMom 10:53 AM 09-08-2014
Thanks I'll look there too.
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NeedaVaca 11:19 AM 09-08-2014
If they have been diagnosed why on earth are they not getting therapy services? They are free at the school! I feel like that is neglect and would not keep them in my care unless parents were getting them the help they need.

Yes, I do have someone with speech problems. MY son, he has Apraxia. No, I do not worry about his speech impacting the other children in my care, they speak wonderfully and as a matter of fact I believe his speech improves by interacting with the other kids.

If the way they talk bothers you this much you should probably let them go...the families need speech services and a provider that is willing to help with speech throughout the day as well.
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EchoMom 11:28 AM 09-08-2014
Oh my goodness I definitely agree and I HAVE tried to help throughout the day for 2 years with the one child. I have pushed and pushed the mom to get her assessed and intervention. I've researched the delay to death and had it accurately diagnosed before the mom FINALLY got the assessment. But there is nOthing more I can do and now having a second severely impaired speaking child is REALLY discouraging and really wears on me to listen to all day. ..

NeedsVaca, also though, I agree it's probably excellent for your son to soak in the speech of his on target peers. But what about the reverse where my son is on target but outnumbered by only one well speaking peer and two severely delayed children (speech only)?
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NeedaVaca 11:47 AM 09-08-2014
I just haven't seen that happen. All the kids my DS is around, DCK's, cousins, neighborhood kids they talk the way they always do, I have never seen them reverse in any way. I don't think its likely...Picking up bad habits-yes,bad words or behaviors-yes but to start speaking so that they aren't understood? no

As for the parents not getting the child services? I could not be a part of that...I would tell the DCM either she get's him services or I'm terming.
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melilley 11:59 AM 09-08-2014
I have 2 children who have speech delay's. They are both being assessed. One child used to only point and say ouuuu ouuuu over and over, all day and it drove me nuts just because it was over and over and over, but I just kept talking to him and kind of got used to it. He is almost 3 and his is JUST now getting him assessed in a couple of days. She kept saying, I'll wait until he's this old, then this old. Finally I was blunt with her and told her that I thought he should get assessed and she thanked me and made the call.

The other child is 2 and can say a few words, but is always pointing and saying things, but I can't understand him. Mom and dad say that he can say about 20 words, but I've only heard about 4. It doesn't bother me.

My other dck's speak very well and I don't think that the speech delay's of the other children affect them.

My ds is 2 and has been talking a little, but in the last 2 months, has really started talking. I was a little worried that he would hear how the other two boys talked and wouldn't talk, but he seems to be picking up on new words every day so I am not worried anymore.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:03 PM 09-08-2014
I have one now and had one in the past. It doesn't bother me. Only repetitive things bother me, regardless of their speaking skills. My little guy with a speech delay isn't repetitive. My very well spoken whiner is and THAT makes my ears bleed.

I would absolutely insist that they see someone about their delays and seek treatment. That is so unfair to the children.
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Kabob 12:42 PM 09-08-2014
Originally Posted by EchoMom:
Do you have any children with severe speech delays/disorders?

If so, do the severe speech errors bother you?

Do you worry about the influence on your own child?



I currently have infants and 4 preschool age children (including my son). Myself and my assisstant (my mom). I've never had this problem so bad but now I have high percentage of children with severe articulation disorder. My own son just turned 3 and speaks very well. Another child his exact age also speaks perfectly. But the other 2 children are almost 4 and both diagnosed with severe articulation disorder that makes 90% of their speech unintelligible.

The well spoken child has been with me 1.5years. One of the delayed children has been here since 24 months so 2 years. The other delayed child has only been here a few weeks and didn't talk enough at the interview to notice.

The long term child has sometimes bitten and scratched out of communication frustration but has mostly grown out of that acting out. The new child is very well behaved. But both BUTCHER everything they say and neither are receiving any intervention.

I know it's not nice to say but now lIstening to TWO severe speech disorders makes my ears bleed and drives me BANANAS. Would it concern anyone else for your young 3 year old to be listening to 2 out of 3 peers speak so unintelligibly for 40-50 hours a week?

Please don't underestimate how severe the articulation disorders are. Really an outsider does NOT understand anything these 2 (unrelated) children say. The only reason we can understand some is because we spend so many hours a week listening to it.
To answer your questions:

Yep.

Nope.

Nope.

My own child is speech delayed and he gets speech therapy every week. I had to switch pediatricians because his old one kept putting off my concerns about his speech...she literally would say "let's wait another 6 months" at every appt. When he was about 2 I had enough and got his assessed and also found out he had no hearing in one ear and very little in another. After getting tubes the problem with his hearing was solved but now he is almost 3 and we still struggle daily with his speech. We are making progress and it only bugs me when he melts down because he can't get his point across to me.

My thing is: why are you so concerned about your child's speech? In the past 1.5 years have they regressed? Is your child showing other worrisome behaviors?

I believe children do mimic things they can be tweaked (i.e. "use your words please") or if they are regressing then maybe they have an issue of their own that needs to be addressed (i.e. autism, stress, hearing, etc). Please inform those parents of your concerns or term if it really bothers you that much. There's nothing wrong with drawing a line with what you can do for a child. It is not your responsibility to "fix" the delay.

This is a topic near and dear to me as I once had a former parent come up to me in public and inform me that after not being in my care for months, dcg suddenly stopped talking to her recently so it must be my son's fault. It hurt. She knew I was struggling with helping ds talk and she was angry about being kicked out of daycare but it still hurt even though I knew it wasn't true. That's like telling a parent of an autistic child that you don't want your child to play with them anymore because you're afraid they'll catch their autism.

I mean this in the nicest tone possible; just trying to give this a different perspective.

Maybe the parents haven't done anything because they also have pediatricians that are telling them to wait. Maybe they are afraid to do the hard work. Maybe they don't want to admit that their child is behind because they worry that reflects on them.

Also, I have a 2 yo dcg that has been here for over a year and her language has blossomed here. She is well ahead of other children her age and we have lovely conversations every day. So, no, my son did not affect her development and she definitely didn't regress. She also is my only "talker" here so the young dcks have not slowed her down either. Some days I wish she'd give me a break with all the chattiness.
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melilley 12:50 PM 09-08-2014
Also, if you think about it, many times we say that a child isn't talking because they have older siblings/peers talking "for" them. In that instance, there are kids who are talking, but the other child isn't.

I don't think that because a child has a speech delay, that other children won't talk because of it.

Just a random thought.
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melilley 12:52 PM 09-08-2014
[quote=Kabob;493561
This is a topic near and dear to me as I once had a former parent come up to me in public and inform me that after not being in my care for months, dcg suddenly stopped talking to her recently so it must be my son's fault. It hurt. She knew I was struggling with helping ds talk and she was angry about being kicked out of daycare but it still hurt even though I knew it wasn't true. That's like telling a parent of an autistic child that you don't want your child to play with them anymore because you're afraid they'll catch their autism.

[/QUOTE]
That was really crappy of that person to say that to you. Some people are so ignorant. I'm like you, it would have broke my heart to hear that.
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EchoMom 01:06 PM 09-08-2014
Good Question. No, my son's speech has continued to flourish and shown no signs of being negatively affected.

However, I am a worried and this is a new situation. I've never had TWO daycare children with severe speech impairments before. Also I've never had only ONE well speaking peer for him to talk to before.

I'm just wondering thoughts from others because there is abundant info when I Google speech delays but nOthing regarding the reverse. If being surrounDed by positive peer mOdels is beneficial for a delayed speaker to soak up... I'm just wondering if it works in the reverse of what happens when an on target speaker is outnumbered by delayed pee models if it has a Negative soaking up effect.
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Kabob 01:09 PM 09-08-2014
Originally Posted by melilley:
That was really crappy of that person to say that to you. Some people are so ignorant. I'm like you, it would have broke my heart to hear that.
Yeah. I went home and cried. I don't usually get that emotional but I was just celebrating that he started saying "mama" and then I got hit with reality so to speak. People try to talk to my son all the time and he'll just smile but not respond so they immediately ask me what's wrong with him. I don't take it personal but it's tough getting those looks...I know I'm a young mom so people are quick to assume...
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Kabob 01:12 PM 09-08-2014
Originally Posted by EchoMom:
Good Question. No, my son's speech has continued to flourish and shown no signs of being negatively affected.

However, I am a worried and this is a new situation. I've never had TWO daycare children with severe speech impairments before. Also I've never had only ONE well speaking peer for him to talk to before.

I'm just wondering thoughts from others because there is abundant info when I Google speech delays but nOthing regarding the reverse. If being surrounDed by positive peer mOdels is beneficial for a delayed speaker to soak up... I'm just wondering if it works in the reverse of what happens when an on target speaker is outnumbered by delayed pee models if it has a Negative soaking up effect.
I also had 2 speech delayed children in my care...my son and an older 3 yo boy. Again, no effect on the younger children and the older speech delayed children just worked around them, so to speak. It was like having two nonverbal infants in care that happened to be walking and participating in older kids' activities. I guess they just don't give it much thought. At least, that's my experience.
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daycare 03:14 PM 09-08-2014
I am working right now with two kids that have speech delay and I feel your pain.

one has no words at all and the other we can't understand anything she says.

I have been working with a speech-language pathologist, but having them come once a month does not give me enough to help these two.

I just try to remind myself that they are different and with that being said, we do have to do things differently with them. I do all that I can to make them feel as respected and loved as the rest, but it does take a toll on me.

Thank goodness both of mine are both part time.
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knoxmomof2 04:10 PM 09-08-2014
I don't have that experience right now with the dck's, but I do have experience with speech delays (DS11 had speech delays and speech therapy for about a year and was eventually dx'd with High Functioning Autism). DD(now 10) was lisping at 3-4 and, due to my experience with DS, we had her evaluated and were told that at her age the lisp was not a huge concern since there is development still happening. She outgrew it within the year.

I said that to say this: biggest lessons I learned from the professionals who helped him: 1) repeat what they said, but say it correctly in the form of a question/ statement 2) choose your battles because it can affect the child's sense of self at some point if you're constantly correcting everything.

I don't know what the specific issues are, so a vague example could be: if he says "I runned and I jump-ed and I swimmed fast!" You could say "Oh yeah? You RAN and JUMPED and SWAM fast? Wow!" (emphasizing the correct words). It seems subtle, but it's what you, as a caregiver, are able to do for him. He doesn't really realize you're correcting him, you're just modeling good speech. Again, try to kind of stagger when you correct and when you don't. I realize you're talking about WAY more than just a few words, but maybe that will point you in the right direction?

As far as your son, if you find him repeating bad grammar/ pronunciation, do the same thing as suggested above, except you can be a little more vigilant if you know that he knows the proper way to say it.

I do it with my own 2 even today. If their grammar is wrong, I correct them- just more directly since they're older.

As far as no therapy, I don't know what your dcp's reasons are, but for us it was a couple of things: #1, we were in denial that our son could have a problem (very common btw), #2, we didn't know where to start. My FIL told us about ChildFind and free monthly screenings they held in our county. They are generally nationwide, so a good place to start if you can ever get them to consider it. Good luck!
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Kabob 06:34 AM 09-09-2014
Originally Posted by knoxmomof2:
I don't have that experience right now with the dck's, but I do have experience with speech delays (DS11 had speech delays and speech therapy for about a year and was eventually dx'd with High Functioning Autism). DD(now 10) was lisping at 3-4 and, due to my experience with DS, we had her evaluated and were told that at her age the lisp was not a huge concern since there is development still happening. She outgrew it within the year.

I said that to say this: biggest lessons I learned from the professionals who helped him: 1) repeat what they said, but say it correctly in the form of a question/ statement 2) choose your battles because it can affect the child's sense of self at some point if you're constantly correcting everything.

I don't know what the specific issues are, so a vague example could be: if he says "I runned and I jump-ed and I swimmed fast!" You could say "Oh yeah? You RAN and JUMPED and SWAM fast? Wow!" (emphasizing the correct words). It seems subtle, but it's what you, as a caregiver, are able to do for him. He doesn't really realize you're correcting him, you're just modeling good speech. Again, try to kind of stagger when you correct and when you don't. I realize you're talking about WAY more than just a few words, but maybe that will point you in the right direction?

As far as your son, if you find him repeating bad grammar/ pronunciation, do the same thing as suggested above, except you can be a little more vigilant if you know that he knows the proper way to say it.

I do it with my own 2 even today. If their grammar is wrong, I correct them- just more directly since they're older.

As far as no therapy, I don't know what your dcp's reasons are, but for us it was a couple of things: #1, we were in denial that our son could have a problem (very common btw), #2, we didn't know where to start. My FIL told us about ChildFind and free monthly screenings they held in our county. They are generally nationwide, so a good place to start if you can ever get them to consider it. Good luck!


Again, I wouldn't expect you to "fix" my son's speech and your families shouldn't either. You can work with them to support their efforts or simply let them go. It does take extra work in some cases to help speech delayed children through the day...my own son used to melt down a lot during transitions or when he couldn't get me to understand him. It was draining. I would not have expected any other daycare provider to deal with that stress. You do what ya gotta do.

Again, if it is bothering you, there is nothing wrong with speaking up and even going so far as to term if you feel that you can't provide the care they need and/or it is taking a toll on you. I can't term my son but there are some days where I make dh take him aside when he is getting overly frustrated. I am lucky to have that resource. If I didn't have that resource, I think I'd be bald at the end of some days.
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