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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Anyone Jealous or Upset With Other Providers Near You?
LovetheSun 10:26 PM 02-17-2015
Hi there!

Long story short after working for 9 years in a daycare as a assistant I decided to open my own daycare (not in the same area)... which bought us a lot of conflict between the owner and myself.

I build up her daycare with her, I was there from the beginning and gave a lot of myself. I had many ideas and didn't hold back anything, I don't want to sound like I'm bragging but I worked so so so hard and thought as her as a close friend.

She really try to stop me from leaving (offering to work with her when I finally passed my license, saying to people I still work with her when I already opened) she discourage me so many time so we hasn't spoke in a while.

But I must admit, I hate it, but I secretly spy on her.. Facebook and else. She copy lots of the stuff I put on my website..

And I am experiencing jealousy which I hate even more even if I am doing well myself.

Anyone had similar experience? How do you deal with jealousy?
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laundrymom 05:26 AM 02-18-2015
My advice is to move on. Stop checking up on her. Do your own thing and be confident in yourself and your program. I've not been jealous in this way but do envy a fellow provider who has a SWEEEEET setup that I'd like to use as a template for my own once I find a new home. I hope she doesn't feel angry because I am not trying to be her-just the best version of me I can.
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Annalee 05:40 AM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
My advice is to move on. Stop checking up on her. Do your own thing and be confident in yourself and your program. I've not been jealous in this way but do envy a fellow provider who has a SWEEEEET setup that I'd like to use as a template for my own once I find a new home. I hope she doesn't feel angry because I am not trying to be her-just the best version of me I can.
^^^^ There are all kinds of clients and each provider is unique even if we all share ideas about how we set up or run our programs. I have child care centers within 5 miles of each side of me. We are all on the main highway. BUT we never seem to have issues. There have been some daycare swapping but usually it is due to rates/hours/or having to do with holiday/vacation pay. I hold to my contract just like the other providers do and the client makes the choice of where to attend and what contract they want for their family. BTW, FB has more information than I want to know personally and professionally...getting away from FB will alleviate stress and jealousy....can't be jealous of what you don't know about
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Thriftylady 05:44 AM 02-18-2015
I am not jealous of anyone. I think that is the joy of being in business for yourself. We each get to make our program what we want it to be and do things the way we think they should be and enjoy doing them. We also each get to tailor or program to the kids in our group. No home daycare can or should be the same.

I think it is great you put your all into that job when you had it, but you have moved on, so not it is time to put your all into your home daycare and make it everything you want it to be. Ignore her program, it is hers and yours is yours. Have faith in yourself.
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Unregistered 05:55 AM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by Annalee:
^^^^ There are all kinds of clients and each provider is unique even if we all share ideas about how we set up or run our programs. I have child care centers within 5 miles of each side of me. We are all on the main highway. BUT we never seem to have issues. There have been some daycare swapping but usually it is due to rates/hours/or having to do with holiday/vacation pay. I hold to my contract just like the other providers do and the client makes the choice of where to attend and what contract they want for their family. BTW, FB has more information than I want to know personally and professionally...getting away from FB will alleviate stress and jelousy....can't be jealous of what you don't know about
So agree! I don't go near FB, with a 10 foot pole. Especially in the winter, when I'm stuck inside and bored. For ME, I know it's not a healthy way to spend my time. (Also, remember that FB is the annual Christmas card photo. It's a manipulated projection of what they want you to see--not always the truth.) And honestly, I think it's hard to come up with an original idea in this business that hasn't already been used--when we're all devoting so many hours and days to the same job.
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Annalee 05:58 AM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
So agree! I don't go near FB, with a 10 foot pole. Especially in the winter, when I'm stuck inside and bored. For ME, I know it's not a healthy way to spend my time. (Also, remember that FB is the annual Christmas card photo. It's a manipulated projection of what they want you to see--not always the truth.) And honestly, I think it's hard to come up with an original idea in this business that hasn't already been used--when we're all devoting so many hours and days to the same job.

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Rockgirl 05:59 AM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by Thriftylady:
I am not jealous of anyone. I think that is the joy of being in business for yourself. We each get to make our program what we want it to be and do things the way we think they should be and enjoy doing them. We also each get to tailor or program to the kids in our group. No home daycare can or should be the same.

I think it is great you put your all into that job when you had it, but you have moved on, so not it is time to put your all into your home daycare and make it everything you want it to be. Ignore her program, it is hers and yours is yours. Have faith in yourself.
This!
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Unregistered 08:16 AM 02-18-2015
Stop watching her fb and keep developing your own ideas.

I live in a big city. I have centers/preschools : 1 block, 1 block another direction, 3 blocks, 3 blocks another direction, 4 blocks, 4 blocks another direction but I don't even think about it because we all offer different things. In fact going to write this, I kept thinking Oh, and that one too! And I have dc homes within those distances too. I do not even feel we are competition for each other because we are all so different.

Do what you do and dont worry about her.
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Blackcat31 09:35 AM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
So agree! I don't go near FB, with a 10 foot pole. Especially in the winter, when I'm stuck inside and bored. For ME, I know it's not a healthy way to spend my time. (Also, remember that FB is the annual Christmas card photo. It's a manipulated projection of what they want you to see--not always the truth.) And honestly, I think it's hard to come up with an original idea in this business that hasn't already been used--when we're all devoting so many hours and days to the same job.


My husband always says Facebook is nothing more than social masturbation.
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laundrymom 09:58 AM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:


My husband always says Facebook is nothing more than social masturbation.
Get your butt to indiana and get these kids back to sleep because I quite literally just spit tea across the room and woke two up!!!!
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Blackcat31 10:00 AM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by laundrymom:
Get your butt to indiana and get these kids back to sleep because I quite literally just spit tea across the room and woke two up!!!!
(whispering quietly) sorry....

But it's so true, right?!
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daycarediva 10:02 AM 02-18-2015
LOL BC! How very accurate!!!

I don't have a personal facebook page. No thanks. LOL!


I have a provider copying me (literally- copying and pasting, not just ideas/crafts/parties/events), local, drives me nuts. So not jealous of her. MAD? you betcha.
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melilley 02:18 PM 02-18-2015
I'm not jealous of the other providers in my area. In fact, many of us are on a local fb forum and we help each other out. We even share assistants if we need time away for something. I am however jealous of some of their set ups, but it's an envious type of jealousy...lol
Some have these huge rooms or basements and I wish I could have that, but I know I'm doing the best I can with my space and in time, will have it the way I want....maybe...lol

There is one provider who is not in my immediate area, but sort of closer, that likes to copy parts of my fb ad and it bothered me at first, but comparing hers to mine and listening to advice on here, made me realize that she must love my ad to want to use parts of it in hers.
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Janiam 07:30 PM 02-18-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:


My husband always says Facebook is nothing more than social masturbation.
OMG....dying here! That is so true!
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KidGrind 05:11 PM 02-21-2015
I am happy for my peers.

I don’t have time for envy or jealousy. I think when you allow those feelings to creep into your mind the focus on WHAT YOU’RE DOING shifts to WHAT SOMEONE ELSE IS DOING.

Focusing on what someone else is doing isn’t beneficial to my business or life.
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