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blueclouds29 01:55 PM 07-26-2011
I'm at my wits end here... I have a 15 month old DCB who throws everything ALL THE TIME!! I talked to mom about it and she said 'its funny isn't it, he's so rough... ' ummm no its not, not when he shucks a toy at a child! He's not doing it to be mean just to be funny. When i take him aside and tell him, 'no we don't throw our toys, we play with them, he just smiles and laughs. UGhhhh...
Sitting him aside and saying 'no, we don't throw', is not working or taking the toy he threw away. I also do the positive praise when he puts something down or does something good.
Any ideas.. please!
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dEHmom 02:01 PM 07-26-2011
Originally Posted by blueclouds29:
I'm at my wits end here... I have a 15 month old DCB who throws everything ALL THE TIME!! I talked to mom about it and she said 'its funny isn't it, he's so rough... ' ummm no its not, not when he shucks a toy at a child! He's not doing it to be mean just to be funny. When i take him aside and tell him, 'no we don't throw our toys, we play with them, he just smiles and laughs. UGhhhh...
Sitting him aside and saying 'no, we don't throw', is not working or taking the toy he threw away. I also do the positive praise when he puts something down or does something good.
Any ideas.. please!
i'm in the same boat with my 2 dcb's which are also about 15 mths old. they both melt down and have a crying fit and one of the yells in his quack talk anytime i try and teach them not to throw.
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MarinaVanessa 02:49 PM 07-26-2011
How about separating him and giving him his own soft "baby" toys to play with, you know ...something boring. Each time he throws say "No throw" and put him in his "space" with these toys. If he throws any of the baby toys out of his area he loses them, eventually he may have nothing to play with. Start with smaller time frames like 15-30 minutes and then let him rejoin the group. If he does it again separate him again but double the time. Rinse and repeat. I did this with one of my DC boys and it worked. He was so bad that sometimes he spent more of his day separated and playing with baby toys than with the other kids until he finally figured it out (took 2 weeks or so). He sometimes forgets still and throws something and all it takes is a stern look and a firm "do you want to play baby toys?" to get him back on track.
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blueclouds29 03:26 PM 07-26-2011
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
How about separating him and giving him his own soft "baby" toys to play with, you know ...something boring. Each time he throws say "No throw" and put him in his "space" with these toys. If he throws any of the baby toys out of his area he loses them, eventually he may have nothing to play with. Start with smaller time frames like 15-30 minutes and then let him rejoin the group. If he does it again separate him again but double the time. Rinse and repeat. I did this with one of my DC boys and it worked. He was so bad that sometimes he spent more of his day separated and playing with baby toys than with the other kids until he finally figured it out (took 2 weeks or so). He sometimes forgets still and throws something and all it takes is a stern look and a firm "do you want to play baby toys?" to get him back on track.
I LOVE this idea! Can't wait to start tomorrow! Thank you!
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dEHmom 02:27 PM 08-02-2011
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
How about separating him and giving him his own soft "baby" toys to play with, you know ...something boring. Each time he throws say "No throw" and put him in his "space" with these toys. If he throws any of the baby toys out of his area he loses them, eventually he may have nothing to play with. Start with smaller time frames like 15-30 minutes and then let him rejoin the group. If he does it again separate him again but double the time. Rinse and repeat. I did this with one of my DC boys and it worked. He was so bad that sometimes he spent more of his day separated and playing with baby toys than with the other kids until he finally figured it out (took 2 weeks or so). He sometimes forgets still and throws something and all it takes is a stern look and a firm "do you want to play baby toys?" to get him back on track.
i like this idea but don't really know how to separate them. I don't have any space other than their pnp's in a different room. I put one in time out just now. and he tried to sneak out (17 mths old) and when i looked he scootched back. He knows right now he is not allowed to play with a certain toy, but he keeps trying to sneak it, and i look at him and he backs away. but then he's throwing EVERYTHING else right now when i dont' have my eye on him for a second. He's being sneaky about it which tells me he completely understands the behaviour. but he is throwing his shoes, sippy cup, toys, and anything else he can get his hands on. his dad will be here right away, but he's driving me mad, and i hate when a parent comes and their kid is crying.

Also, i know he does this at home, cause his moms asked about the throwing food/plates/etc also, and I would like to give some advice on how to deal at home for them, and i want to be consistant, but to them he is still a baby, and we probably won't see eye to eye. They don't want to think that he "understands" discipline, bad behavior etc. Even though they know it, they won't admit it. They are good parents, but baby him a little too much.
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kidkair 02:56 PM 08-02-2011
If acceptable I give them something they can do with the behavior they are doing. So with throwing I'd give them bean bags/rolled up socks/small balls and a basket/box to throw them into. I'd have it available all the time and move them to that area if they decided to throw a different toy.

Food/plates/cups I take away all food and tray and make them stay in the chair until the end of the meal.

I also use a very stern "no" when I catch them the instant the toy has left their hand before redirecting or taking away food. I follow the no with a longer statement generally a positive.
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dEHmom 03:06 PM 08-02-2011
Originally Posted by kidkair:
If acceptable I give them something they can do with the behavior they are doing. So with throwing I'd give them bean bags/rolled up socks/small balls and a basket/box to throw them into. I'd have it available all the time and move them to that area if they decided to throw a different toy.

Food/plates/cups I take away all food and tray and make them stay in the chair until the end of the meal.

I also use a very stern "no" when I catch them the instant the toy has left their hand before redirecting or taking away food. I follow the no with a longer statement generally a positive.
yes this is exactly what i do minus the throwing beanbags etc. I don't have anything like that and don't intend to get it. We have balls and stuff outside to play with, but I don't allow any throwing inside because it always gets extreme with the older kids.

I just discussed with dad, asked him how they deal with it at home so that I can be consistent with what they are doing. We talked about how dcb understands the behavior, discipline and all that. And we came to an agreement on how to deal with it. Sounds like they are on the same page because what he said they do i said is what I do, but I went a little further to explain that when dcb throws dcd's phone and he takes it away, it means nothing to him, because he's not supposed to have it anyway. I also told him that today dcb had a timeout (i hate that word) because he was hurting other kids by throwing toys, and that he completely understood the timeout.
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Sugar Magnolia 03:16 PM 08-02-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
i'm in the same boat with my 2 dcb's which are also about 15 mths old. they both melt down and have a crying fit and one of the yells in his quack talk anytime i try and teach them not to throw.
That makes three of us! patience, patience, patience.... "No throwing" with stern voice and frown! Repeat repeat. My chucker is 18 months....hang on!
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dEHmom 03:21 PM 08-02-2011
i just realized there are about 3 threads on this exact same thing going on right now lol.

i did the timeout today because i've had enough. my back is killing me today, and i've had an icky stomach for about a week now. with the long weekend 1 kid wasn't here for almost a week, and the one who was bad today was gone since noon on friday and back today. so it was a tough day. timeout worked pretty well, but he's in the testing phase, so he sits there touching something and waits for you to look, he'll run away and throw it when you go for him, too. it's annoying, and it's been going on for about 2 months now, but it gets better and worse depending on whether he's been home with mom or not.
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blueclouds29 04:59 PM 08-02-2011
How about when they look at you and laugh, then throw the toy or hit someone. Then when they are put in time out they get up and do again. This is repeated over and over with a laugh.. I don't think he hears 'no' at home. Mom says, 'oh, he's just a boy, they are going to be rough'. Yes, but they need to learn the word 'no' and listen when you are not supposed to do something. Errrr
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Tags:discipline - consistency, throwing
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