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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>If It's Not One Thing, It's Another
Kabob 06:26 AM 04-07-2014
Does it always seem like once you get rid of or correct a "problem parent", another one steps up to fill the void?
It's like the parents have a meeting every Sunday night and say "Gee, so-and-so isn't here anymore so one of us has to be crabby/late/bring a sick child/not listen/generally act like a spoiled child."
In my case, I was stupid enough to grandfather in a dcm when I changed to contracted hours and started closing at 5pm instead of 6pm. I wimped out and have been letting her pick up at 5:15-5:20pm for no additional charge (normally $5 per 15 minutes for "overtime"). So dcg is here over 10 hours a day from open to past closing. I told dcm that I will do this as long as it works for me. She was upset about that because she said she could never pick up earlier or drop off later because she and dcd have schedules that will never change. Of course they both dictate their schedules but she just likes the schedule she has because she can have more days off for working longer hours...
I know that if you give "special" treatment they will eventually see it as normal or required treatment...and that certainly seems to be the case. Dcm let it slip that dcd had the day off Friday and instead of picking dcg up at 5pm or earlier, or even dropping dcg off later, he wanted dcm to drop off and pick up at the "normal" time...taking advantage of those free 15-20 minutes. I got so angry with myself. I know better. I just had hoped as a long standing client (for me anyway since I'm still new), she wouldn't take advantage of me. Well duh I've obviously been mistaken.
So now I must fix this. She already is upset she has to find daycare for 2 weeks (unpaid for me) when I have my baby (in 2 months or less).
She also is upset I don't do free sick days anymore. She has never used one until today....she called at the scheduled drop off time to say she was coming later today because dcg vomited last night. I said sorry to hear that, see her tomorrow. Dcm got upset and said dcg wasn't sick, just ate something icky and I replied, well we don't know that since it hasn't been more than a few hours. So yeah...my morning is free but I'm not happy about it...
I guess this is more of a vent than anything...I keep trying to do nice things thinking that person will appreciate it and not take advantage of me...and so far I've been wrong every single time. Ugh!
It's like the parents have a meeting every Sunday night and say "Gee, so-and-so isn't here anymore so one of us has to be crabby/late/bring a sick child/not listen/generally act like a spoiled child."
In my case, I was stupid enough to grandfather in a dcm when I changed to contracted hours and started closing at 5pm instead of 6pm. I wimped out and have been letting her pick up at 5:15-5:20pm for no additional charge (normally $5 per 15 minutes for "overtime"). So dcg is here over 10 hours a day from open to past closing. I told dcm that I will do this as long as it works for me. She was upset about that because she said she could never pick up earlier or drop off later because she and dcd have schedules that will never change. Of course they both dictate their schedules but she just likes the schedule she has because she can have more days off for working longer hours...
I know that if you give "special" treatment they will eventually see it as normal or required treatment...and that certainly seems to be the case. Dcm let it slip that dcd had the day off Friday and instead of picking dcg up at 5pm or earlier, or even dropping dcg off later, he wanted dcm to drop off and pick up at the "normal" time...taking advantage of those free 15-20 minutes. I got so angry with myself. I know better. I just had hoped as a long standing client (for me anyway since I'm still new), she wouldn't take advantage of me. Well duh I've obviously been mistaken.
So now I must fix this. She already is upset she has to find daycare for 2 weeks (unpaid for me) when I have my baby (in 2 months or less).
She also is upset I don't do free sick days anymore. She has never used one until today....she called at the scheduled drop off time to say she was coming later today because dcg vomited last night. I said sorry to hear that, see her tomorrow. Dcm got upset and said dcg wasn't sick, just ate something icky and I replied, well we don't know that since it hasn't been more than a few hours. So yeah...my morning is free but I'm not happy about it...
I guess this is more of a vent than anything...I keep trying to do nice things thinking that person will appreciate it and not take advantage of me...and so far I've been wrong every single time. Ugh!
Evansmom 07:37 AM 04-07-2014
I'm sorry this is happening to you. I did similar things for a family once trying to help and they ended up walking all over me too. And they seemed like such nice people in the beginning. But I think they wanted to feel they were special somehow and when I started treating them like all the other families they got mad about it.
If there is one thing I have learned in life it's this: when someone shows you what they're like, believe them. They're showing you what they're like, they take advantage of you. So now you have to believe them.
If there is one thing I have learned in life it's this: when someone shows you what they're like, believe them. They're showing you what they're like, they take advantage of you. So now you have to believe them.
Blackcat31 07:45 AM 04-07-2014
Normally I would not say this but I know that sometimes when working with a longevity type client, they do start feeling "pissy" when the rules or policies change......NOT that you have to continue doing things her way but what I would do is offer to allow her the opportunity to continue coming on the schedule she has been using but rather than grandfather her in at no cost, charge her for these extras.
Present it like a compromise and let her know that you are willing to give the time IF she is willing to give the $. Win-win for both of you.
Say something like this:
Dear DCM
Working 10+ hours per day has worked for me in the past but as of now these long days are slowly taking away my personally family time.
As a compromise, I am willing to allow you to continue picking up and dropping off at your normal times however, there will be an additional fee for this additional time.
I feel that is the best way to meet both of our needs as well as being a reasonable compromise for both parties.
Thank you for your respect and consideration in this matter
Sincerely
Daycare Provider
Present it like a compromise and let her know that you are willing to give the time IF she is willing to give the $. Win-win for both of you.
Say something like this:
Dear DCM
Working 10+ hours per day has worked for me in the past but as of now these long days are slowly taking away my personally family time.
As a compromise, I am willing to allow you to continue picking up and dropping off at your normal times however, there will be an additional fee for this additional time.
I feel that is the best way to meet both of our needs as well as being a reasonable compromise for both parties.
Thank you for your respect and consideration in this matter
Sincerely
Daycare Provider
Laurel 10:08 AM 04-07-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Normally I would not say this but I know that sometimes when working with a longevity type client, they do start feeling "pissy" when the rules or policies change......NOT that you have to continue doing things her way but what I would do is offer to allow her the opportunity to continue coming on the schedule she has been using but rather than grandfather her in at no cost, charge her for these extras.
Present it like a compromise and let her know that you are willing to give the time IF she is willing to give the $. Win-win for both of you.
Say something like this:
Dear DCM
Working 10+ hours per day has worked for me in the past but as of now these long days are slowly taking away my personally family time.
As a compromise, I am willing to allow you to continue picking up and dropping off at your normal times however, there will be an additional fee for this additional time.
I feel that is the best way to meet both of our needs as well as being a reasonable compromise for both parties.
Thank you for your respect and consideration in this matter
Sincerely
Daycare Provider
Normally I would not say this but I know that sometimes when working with a longevity type client, they do start feeling "pissy" when the rules or policies change......NOT that you have to continue doing things her way but what I would do is offer to allow her the opportunity to continue coming on the schedule she has been using but rather than grandfather her in at no cost, charge her for these extras.
Present it like a compromise and let her know that you are willing to give the time IF she is willing to give the $. Win-win for both of you.
Say something like this:
Dear DCM
Working 10+ hours per day has worked for me in the past but as of now these long days are slowly taking away my personally family time.
As a compromise, I am willing to allow you to continue picking up and dropping off at your normal times however, there will be an additional fee for this additional time.
I feel that is the best way to meet both of our needs as well as being a reasonable compromise for both parties.
Thank you for your respect and consideration in this matter
Sincerely
Daycare Provider
Also, make the extra money a fair amount to YOU. Don't cheat yourself by not charging what you really feel you should have for this extra service you are providing.
Kabob 11:03 AM 04-07-2014
Thanks! I felt like I was being really crabby about it. My attitude now is of she leaves, she leaves....my days have begun to stretch towards 11 hours again and I'm not thrilled...
TwinKristi 11:12 AM 04-07-2014
Originally Posted by Laurel:
Also, make the extra money a fair amount to YOU. Don't cheat yourself by not charging what you really feel you should have for this extra service you are providing.
Exactly! And maybe dad would have picked up on time if they have to pay for that time instead of it being free!Also, make the extra money a fair amount to YOU. Don't cheat yourself by not charging what you really feel you should have for this extra service you are providing.
Kabob 11:16 AM 04-07-2014
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
Exactly! And maybe dad would have picked up on time if they have to pay for that time instead of it being free!
I could be a real meanie and charge both overtime fee and late pickup fee... $10 per 15 minutes...I just don't want to sound greedy. I just want my days to be shorter...they are the only ones that drag it out...everyone else is 9 hours or less...so maybe I just got too cozy.Exactly! And maybe dad would have picked up on time if they have to pay for that time instead of it being free!