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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Any One Try The Bye By Binky Method For Taking Away Soothers
elle73 07:15 AM 04-29-2011
I was just wondering if anyone has used this method where you poke holes in the soother and after a couple of days cut the tip of the soother off. I'm getting ready to ween my son off his soother and really don't want to deal with him screaming all day lol.
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elle73 07:19 AM 04-29-2011
Here is a link to the bye bye binky article

http://www.bye-bye-binky.com/download/Bye-Bye-Binky.pdf
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cheerfuldom 07:20 AM 04-29-2011
I tried it with my older but we had much more success just weaning to naps only and then taking that away cold turkey.
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Zoe 07:22 AM 04-29-2011
With my daughter, we just took it away. She cried once about it then never mentioned it again.

My son was a little more attached to it. We tried to snip the tip off, but he still wanted it in his mouth. It didn't matter to him that he couldn't suck. So eventually we just took it away cold turkey. Again, he didn't complain more than a few times.
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Meyou 07:23 AM 04-29-2011
I weaned my daughter and dck's to naptime/bedtime. Then I stopped offering it so they only had it when they asked. They all forgot to ask within a month or two.
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Cat Herder 07:36 AM 04-29-2011
In 1990 my ped told me to poke a small hole in the base of the binky once an infant was well established on the bottle or breast. He said do not buy any more and the infant will gradually no longer want it.

This was an OLD method that he had been recommending since the early 70's.

It lasted this long because it worked.

No binkies in daycare.

Only exception Preemies with feeding/sucking delay/issues.

That is a HOME only item.
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jen2651 06:03 PM 04-29-2011
we just went down to naptime only then after a month of that, we just quit cold turkey...he did ask a few times, but there weren't really the fits I imagined. SAme with his last bottle before bed, it was more for me and my cuddle time than him needing it. I just told him I gave all the bottles to my friend.

I think we are more worried than the kids are when it actually has to happen. But, whatever you do, DONT give in! And the binky for nap and bed only was really good for that month...boy was excited to take a nap!
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gkids09 06:10 PM 04-29-2011
I don't have my own kids, but I was one of those kids who ALWAYS wanted the pacifier. My parents cut the tip off (not just poked a hole in it), and still talk about when I put it back in my mouth and said "It bwoke." lol

They kept ONE that they didn't cut the tip off, but said they never had to give it back. Said I kept saying "It bwoke," and then finally just threw them all away. ha!
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youretooloud 06:55 PM 04-29-2011
A lady on MDC took her son and all of his Binkies to Build a Bear, and they made a bear and put all the binkies inside the bear. It only works with an older child though.. not an infant.
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Symphony 07:46 PM 04-29-2011
My youngest has been biting and chewing on his binkies and most of them are broke now. I think we have maybe 2 that are still fine? He tells me they are broke and then he'll look for one that is less broke. If he can't find one, he'll take the broke one without complaint.
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Lucy 08:08 PM 04-29-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:

No binkies in daycare.

Only exception Preemies with feeding/sucking delay/issues.

That is a HOME only item.
Some infants NEED that sucking action even if they are NOT a preemie. I don't advocate letting it be a crutch, and would probably start weening it away by 8 or 9 months, but I completely disagree with flat out not allowing it for any but preemies.
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spud912 11:39 PM 04-29-2011
We did it cold turkey and our dd asked for it maybe once? It probably didn't help her seeing her baby sister still using one, but luckfully we used different pacifiers for the baby.

I've heard that older children respond well to no pacifier if you have them throw it away themselves. I was going to do that but was hesitant because I wouldn't mind keeping them as back-ups for the baby.
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Lucy 01:20 AM 04-30-2011
Originally Posted by spud912:
We did it cold turkey and our dd asked for it maybe once? It probably didn't help her seeing her baby sister still using one, but luckfully we used different pacifiers for the baby.

I've heard that older children respond well to no pacifier if you have them throw it away themselves. I was going to do that but was hesitant because I wouldn't mind keeping them as back-ups for the baby.
My sister-in-law did that. They reluctantly allowed their daughter to use one until she was 3 yrs old. They told her ahead of time that on her 3rd birthday she'd have to throw them all away. They took them to a cliff (don't worry - it was safe) and had her toss them over. Yes, it was littering. They realized there was probably a better way to go about it, but it made their daughter understand that the binkies were GONE for good! She watched them tumble down the embankment. She never asked for one again.
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Abigail 09:44 PM 04-30-2011
Originally Posted by Joyce:
My sister-in-law did that. They reluctantly allowed their daughter to use one until she was 3 yrs old. They told her ahead of time that on her 3rd birthday she'd have to throw them all away. They took them to a cliff (don't worry - it was safe) and had her toss them over. Yes, it was littering. They realized there was probably a better way to go about it, but it made their daughter understand that the binkies were GONE for good! She watched them tumble down the embankment. She never asked for one again.
I guess if you tie it to a balloon and watch it go is littering too, so whatever works. My sister said she brought her 2yo to Toys R Us and "exchanged" them for a toy......pre-paid for the toy and had her boy turn in his binkies to the cashier..............sadly she didn't follow through and gave him some of his little brother's at home. He has them in his mouth all day long and it drives me nuts! She can't even take it out of his mouth to take a picture and who wants to see 100 pictures of the cutie with paci's in every one of them?! UGH
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Lucy 12:28 AM 05-01-2011
Originally Posted by Abigail:
She can't even take it out of his mouth to take a picture and who wants to see 100 pictures of the cutie with paci's in every one of them?! UGH
I know!!! Drives me nuts too. I have a FB friend with a pretty little daughter, but EVERY pictures she posts of the 2 1/2 yr old has a stupid binky in her mouth. Jeez! 24 hours a day? Really?
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Cat Herder 04:59 PM 05-01-2011
Originally Posted by Joyce:
Some infants NEED that sucking action even if they are NOT a preemie. I don't advocate letting it be a crutch, and would probably start weening it away by 8 or 9 months, but I completely disagree with flat out not allowing it for any but preemies.
I am sure that works great for you in your program. I don't allow them in mine. I ONLY enroll newborn infants and have not had an issue with this policy at all.

The Hospitals don't pop them in infants mouths at birth here anymore. It is not as common and is not considered a NEED for most infants in my experience.

Here they are viewed as a potential Infectious Disease/RSV Issue in Group Childcare by both Pediatricians and Childcare Centers.

You are entitled to your opinion as am I. I am confident in my view.
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Lucy 06:38 PM 05-01-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
I am sure that works great for you in your program. I don't allow them in mine. I ONLY enroll newborn infants and have not had an issue with this policy at all.

The Hospitals don't pop them in infants mouths at birth here anymore. It is not as common and is not considered a NEED for most infants in my experience.

Here they are viewed as a potential Infectious Disease/RSV Issue in Group Childcare by both Pediatricians and Childcare Centers.

You are entitled to your opinion as am I. I am confident in my view.
You are right - everybody gets an opinion. I wasn't saying yours was wrong, I was juts adding my 2 cents. A little sensitive perhaps?

To clarify, I do NOT let them use one past about 8 months. And NEVER all day long. For newborns, it would be available to soothe when they are crying. I really feel that it is a natural human need for newborns to have that sucking motion. But at probably 4-5 months, it becomes just to get them to relax at nap time. By 7-8 months, I try not to give it at all. Believe me, I am TOTALLY opposed to using them over about 8-9 months! If a toddler shows up to daycare with one, I take it away and they don't see it till they leave. I hate binkies for anything but newborns.
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elle73 07:24 PM 05-01-2011
Thanks for all the respones everyone, I think we might do cold turkey because I have noticed lately that my son doesn't need his soother as much as he used to, he can go all day without it and only takes it if he is tired or upset.
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nannyde 08:04 PM 05-01-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
I am sure that works great for you in your program. I don't allow them in mine. I ONLY enroll newborn infants and have not had an issue with this policy at all.

The Hospitals don't pop them in infants mouths at birth here anymore. It is not as common and is not considered a NEED for most infants in my experience.

Here they are viewed as a potential Infectious Disease/RSV Issue in Group Childcare by both Pediatricians and Childcare Centers.

You are entitled to your opinion as am I. I am confident in my view.
No binkies here. I have had many kids that use them at home which works out great for the parents until it's time to wean. I hear about it but it's just another "what happens at home stays at home" deal.
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Live and Learn 10:15 PM 05-01-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:

No binkies in daycare.

Only exception Preemies with feeding/sucking delay/issues.

That is a HOME only item.
My policy exactly.
Never had a paci child here.
I call them baby corks. The parents want/need them more than the children.
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elle73 06:53 AM 05-03-2011
I guess I was worried about this issue for nothing lol, I've noticed the past week that my son has been going pretty much all day without his soother, this morning he came downstairs without his soother and blanket and when I asked him where they were(because he normally sits for about 1/2hr with both of them when he first wakes up)he said to me "no mama stay upstairs" and hasn't asked for either of them since.
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QualiTcare 07:18 AM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by Joyce:
Some infants NEED that sucking action even if they are NOT a preemie. I don't advocate letting it be a crutch, and would probably start weening it away by 8 or 9 months, but I completely disagree with flat out not allowing it for any but preemies.
i agree. ever read or heard about freud's oral stage of development? it doesn't even matter what you think about freud - this particular theory is supported by evidence.

fetuses start sucking their thumbs in the womb. i have an ultrasound pic of my son sucking his thumb. freud says if infants don't get enough of that "sucking action" they'll have an oral fixation later on - whether it be eating too much, smoking, or constantly chewing on things (nails, pens) etc.

it's not so far fetched.
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QualiTcare 07:25 AM 05-03-2011
i told my daughter we were giving all her pacis to the babies bc she was a big girl and didn't need them. she went around the house looking for one and found one under the couch! that happened a couple of times so we had a few relapses, but it really wasn't that hard. the whole "big girl/big boy" thing seems to work pretty well.
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nannyde 07:35 AM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
i agree. ever read or heard about freud's oral stage of development? it doesn't even matter what you think about freud - this particular theory is supported by evidence.

fetuses start sucking their thumbs in the womb. i have an ultrasound pic of my son sucking his thumb. freud says if infants don't get enough of that "sucking action" they'll have an oral fixation later on - whether it be eating too much, smoking, or constantly chewing on things (nails, pens) etc.

it's not so far fetched.
Of course we have heard about oral stage of development. I've got thousands of dollars worth of suck toys for the babies here. They are also here nine of the twenty four hours a day. They can get their suck on a binky for fifteen hours a day at home.

I'll tell ya what.. the breast feeding moms LOVE the no binky here deal. When they get their baby home they get DRAINED real quick like. They know the difference of breast feeding on the weekend and what it's like during the week. They LOVE the instant relief they get when power sucker latches on.

The ones that aren't breast feeding also dig the no binky here. They have some PEACE AND QUIET allllllllllll the way home and at night. I promise you ... after the age of six months... there's not a single one of the parent binky users that would WANT them to use it here. That's for sure.
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QualiTcare 07:46 AM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Of course we have heard about oral stage of development. I've got thousands of dollars worth of suck toys for the babies here. They are also here nine of the twenty four hours a day. They can get their suck on a binky for fifteen hours a day at home.

I'll tell ya what.. the breast feeding moms LOVE the no binky here deal. When they get their baby home they get DRAINED real quick like. They know the difference of breast feeding on the weekend and what it's like during the week. They LOVE the instant relief they get when power sucker latches on.

The ones that aren't breast feeding also dig the no binky here. They have some PEACE AND QUIET allllllllllll the way home and at night. I promise you ... after the age of six months... there's not a single one of the parent binky users that would WANT them to use it here. That's for sure.
what's a "suck toy" exactly? and - what's the difference between allowing "suck toys" and pacifiers?
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nannyde 07:52 AM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
what's a "suck toy" exactly? and - what's the difference between allowing "suck toys" and pacifiers?
Suck toys are infant toys that they suck on. I have a huge collection of really nice baby toys.
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Blackcat31 09:57 AM 05-03-2011
I think that those children that need the extra suckling should simply use what God gave them...their fingers or their thumb. It is natural and has it's own way of eliminating the habit later by forcing the child to remove their thumb or finger so they can play with whatever toy or activity happening. This also occurs naturally as they grow and develop so there isn't the issue with weaning in most cases.

I find no real hard evidence that suggests a man-made or artificial nipple is necessary for any child (except possibly preemies for obvious reasons). IMHO, pacifiers are simply an artificial means in which to provide some sort of stimulation to the child in which he/she already has the capacity of doing on their own (thumb).

Freud also states that "An infant can remain fixated on this stage if the mother overindulges her infant's sucking desire." which to me says pacifiers are bad not necessary.

If pacifiers were necesssary, children would be born with a binky attached. Instead they are born with thumbs and fingers to get the job done for the short amount of time the child spend in the oral fixation stage.
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wdmmom 10:50 AM 05-03-2011
My daycare is a NO BINKY ZONE. I have 1 infant that comes in with it clipped to his bib everyday. He doesn't get it here and he couldn't care less. He's the same happy baby with or without a plug.
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Lucy 12:00 PM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I've got thousands of dollars worth of suck toys for the babies here.
How does one spend thousandS of dollars on "suck toys"? I love me some babies, but to spend $2,000 or more for them to suck on something?
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QualiTcare 12:14 PM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I think that those children that need the extra suckling should simply use what God gave them...their fingers or their thumb. It is natural and has it's own way of eliminating the habit later by forcing the child to remove their thumb or finger so they can play with whatever toy or activity happening. This also occurs naturally as they grow and develop so there isn't the issue with weaning in most cases.

I find no real hard evidence that suggests a man-made or artificial nipple is necessary for any child (except possibly preemies for obvious reasons). IMHO, pacifiers are simply an artificial means in which to provide some sort of stimulation to the child in which he/she already has the capacity of doing on their own (thumb).

Freud also states that "An infant can remain fixated on this stage if the mother overindulges her infant's sucking desire." which to me says pacifiers are bad not necessary.

If pacifiers were necesssary, children would be born with a binky attached. Instead they are born with thumbs and fingers to get the job done for the short amount of time the child spend in the oral fixation stage.
i personally HATE it worse than a pacifier when kids suck on their thumbs. infants is one thing, but i disagree that kids naturally stop sucking their thumbs to engage in activities. i've not seen a lot of 4-5 year olds have pacifiers, but i've seen a lot of 4-5 year olds suck on their thumbs who god only knows where they've been. you can take a pacifier away - you can't take a thumb away unless you wanna cut it off.

yeah, too much can be detrimental also - that's why they're meant to be weaned away. i just mentioned not enough bc that was the discussion at the time. the only way a child would get TOO much is if the parents can't take it away, or the bottle, or the breast, etc. that's another story though.
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nannyde 12:40 PM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by Joyce:
How does one spend thousandS of dollars on "suck toys"? I love me some babies, but to spend $2,000 or more for them to suck on something?
I buy Sassy, Lamaze, Baby Einstein, Leap Frog... the high end toys that last. We have four exersaucers covered with toys and attachment toys and three 18 sqare foot play yards filled with infant toys... all of which are suck toys.

It doesn't take long at all to get to 2K I know I could replace what I have now for that amount of money. That's for sure.
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nannyde 12:49 PM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by Joyce:
How does one spend thousandS of dollars on "suck toys"? I love me some babies, but to spend $2,000 or more for them to suck on something?
http://cgi.ebay.com/Group-7-LAMAZE-B...item19c517edf8

These are the kind I really like. Just seven used ones are 49 shipped. You might get it down to 45 or so but that gives you an idea. I have hundreds of these kinds of toys.
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Symphony 12:53 PM 05-03-2011
I don't allow them at daycare other than nap, but then I'm happy to give a binky. We actually recently had a required sleep seminar in our state that encouraged providers to offer pacifiers at sleep times because it reduces the risk of SIDS.
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Blackcat31 01:17 PM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
i personally HATE it worse than a pacifier when kids suck on their thumbs. infants is one thing, but i disagree that kids naturally stop sucking their thumbs to engage in activities. i've not seen a lot of 4-5 year olds have pacifiers, but i've seen a lot of 4-5 year olds suck on their thumbs who god only knows where they've been. you can take a pacifier away - you can't take a thumb away unless you wanna cut it off.

yeah, too much can be detrimental also - that's why they're meant to be weaned away. i just mentioned not enough bc that was the discussion at the time. the only way a child would get TOO much is if the parents can't take it away, or the bottle, or the breast, etc. that's another story though.
I'm with ya on the thumb sucking habits of older kids, but I am referring to the thumb sucking of little ones....I have seen the exact opposite here. I had 3 kids in the last 5 years who suck their thumbs (2) and fingers (1) and all three stopped on their own naturally when they hit about 18-24 months. The activitiess we did or toys they played with mandated the use of both hands so thumb/finger sucking while up and playing became impossible.

On the opposite side, I have 3 kids right now who are 2, 2.5 and 3.5 yrs old and all three have a paci! They put it in their cubbies the second they arrive here or momma takes it with her then when she returns they physically accost her looking in her pockets for that stupid paci while momma stands there looking like she has no clue how to deal with the whole situation!

I guess either way, it takes some good parenting and a bit of pre-emptive behavior (don't let the paci use go past first year) to break what is now a bad habit.... But I do shudder ever time I see a kid who walks upright and appears to be a big kid until they turn around and have a paci attached to their face! Just like sippy cups and toys from home...keep them on your time and we will get along just fine....

As for the SIDs and paci thing, my class instructor told us it was just one glimmer of a connection that they hoped may prevent it, but there was no hard evidence to suggest it had any real merit.
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Cat Herder 01:33 PM 05-03-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
As for the SIDs and paci thing, my class instructor told us it was just one glimmer of a connection that they hoped may prevent it, but there was no hard evidence to suggest it had any real merit.
Yep, it was an oral interview of 185 families in California, only. Some babies were from SIDS families who died, some were families whose babies had no problems. Just as official/scientific as a poll here. It was in 2005 and NOTHING was proven.

At best a paci keeps them from rolling over on their stomachs at worst it becomes an airway occlusion.

(My children and I were actual participants in the research studies of Back to Sleep in case any newbies were unaware.)
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gkids09 07:54 PM 05-03-2011
I don't allow paci's at my daycare, just because of the germs that can/will be spread when the kid pulls it out and throws it in the floor for someone else to take.

I had TWO kids last year who wanted a paci. At first, I thought it wasn't such a big deal, until they started trying to trade. That was NOT a good thing... One, a dcg, was 2 before her parents even STARTED GIVING IT TO HER, which made me ill to begin with. lol

I finally just started taking them when they got there, putting them in their cubbies, and going on with our day. Dcg NEVER asked for hers. The other one, dcb, did ask for it, but when we told him he'd get it when he went home, he was fine.

Have a new 2 yr old dcg and same dcb (will be 3 in Sept) who still take paci's at home. dcb comes in sometimes with one in his mouth and one in each hand. They act SHOCKED that he's "found" them in the car (yeah right, he's buckled in...), and take them, seeming embarrassed. His teeth are really showing signs of it, as are the 2yr old dcg's.

On the other hand, I also have a FOUR year old dcb who sucks on his fingers. Don't know how to stop it. It's disgusting. He plays with the toys, sucks his fingers, touches the toys. I take them away, make him wash his hands, and he goes right back. UGH.

I would think taking the paci away would be easier just because it's not available at any given moment like a finger/thumb, but that's just my opinion.
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