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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>World's Biggest Flake, or Serial Killer?
Pestle 02:22 PM 06-07-2016
Potential DCM responds to Craigslist ad (I know, I know) with a small amount of info. I respond in kind, with a small amount of info and a request for more info. Eventually I give her my phone number. She calls, says she needs care immediately. I say she needs to come over, see the place, sign a contract. She says, 10:00 Tuesday.

10:00 comes and goes. At 12:30 she calls, says she overslept, can she come by at 2:00. Lots of children screaming in the background. Asks some more questions, says she needs care to start Wednesday.

At 2:45 she calls, says she'll be here by 4:00 if I still want to meet beforehand. I say she definitely needs to come today if she wants care tomorrow.

At 3:50 she calls, more kids yelling in the background, says she's heading out now (from half an hour away). Asks me to text my address because she left it in her email.

So it's 5:15 now, and I want nothing to do with this woman, but my biggest concern is whether this is some kind of Craigslist fraud or murder scam I haven't heard of. If so, I can't figure out how it's supposed to work.

I don't get the continual "I swear I'm on my way," though; it's not like I'm leaving a free couch on the curb. If she shows up tomorrow thinking she can drop her kids off, I'm posting the kids as freebies on Craigslist.
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Thriftylady 02:33 PM 06-07-2016
I don't understand people who want care the next day. I understand even less the ones who are willing to leave their kids with a stranger. But I know they are out there, I have talked to them.
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Josiegirl 02:47 PM 06-07-2016
Did she ever show up at all?
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Pestle 02:59 PM 06-07-2016
Nope! In the middle of this process, I was checking the white pages and Facebook to verify that she's a real human being with genuine children and a past that actually happened. It seems she is.

I just don't know why she'd bother trying to string me along all day. Unless she's been sitting outside the house all day, trying to get me to say, "Sorry, you can't come now; I'm leaving all my extremely valuable possessions unattended while I go shopping." You know. Those extremely valuable possessions that day care providers definitely can afford to own.
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Thriftylady 03:01 PM 06-07-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
Nope! In the middle of this process, I was checking the white pages and Facebook to verify that she's a real human being with genuine children and a past that actually happened. It seems she is.

I just don't know why she'd bother trying to string me along all day. Unless she's been sitting outside the house all day, trying to get me to say, "Sorry, you can't come now; I'm leaving all my extremely valuable possessions unattended while I go shopping." You know. Those extremely valuable possessions that day care providers definitely can afford to own.
So the children? She was waiting for you to leave her more children!
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NillaWafers 03:11 PM 06-07-2016
I had a lady like this. Now I don't reschedule after the 2nd time.

It's crazy someone can call you and TELL YOU they're leaving and just not show up, somehow. Like, did you get lost on the way and just decide not to show up?

I had a lady once come to look at a piece of furniture I was selling. She texted me she was on the street but I was busy and didn't see it. She never came to the door and just left, wasting her gas. like why?!
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Pestle 03:23 PM 06-07-2016
Originally Posted by Thriftylady:
So the children? She was waiting for you to leave her more children!


She definitely needs more of those, yes.
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Josiegirl 03:31 PM 06-07-2016
Maybe some people just need to feel all self important that they keep everybody waiting for them. Like their life is so much more important than anybody else's.

Haha I'd sure like to know which valuable possessions dcproviders can afford to own?? Are you talking about the Mercedes that's disguised as a 2007 Hyundai that, if I'm lucky, will make it til next spring and then fail inspection due to the rust underneath?
Or my valuable silverware that could be antique but the garage sale person sold it to me for $1.00 so he obviously didn't know?
Or it must be the RV that's sitting in my driveway. Oh wait, that's the neighbor's driveway.
I never made tons of money from this job, that's for sure, but I got to be home for my kids while they were growing up(most of the time that was a good thing). And now I get to be home with my dog-kids.

Your next potential dcf will turn out to be the real deal!! Not the world's biggest flake or a serial killer.
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Pestle 03:54 PM 06-07-2016
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
I never made tons of money from this job, that's for sure, but I got to be home for my kids while they were growing up(most of the time that was a good thing).

Your next potential dcf will turn out to be the real deal!!
Thanks for the encouragement! I know things will get better, but I'm a control freak and need the emotional security that comes from knowing the status of the present and the future.
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284878 07:20 PM 06-07-2016
could it be possible that it was another provider checking you out?
Try callIng her back on another line asking for day care.
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Thriftylady 07:55 PM 06-07-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
Thanks for the encouragement! I know things will get better, but I'm a control freak and need the emotional security that comes from knowing the status of the present and the future.
I am the same way with financial stuff. It causes me so much stress.
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Baby Beluga 09:13 PM 06-07-2016
Originally Posted by 284878:
could it be possible that it was another provider checking you out?
Try callIng her back on another line asking for day care.
I had the same thought. Especially since she gave you vague information in the email and you heard a bunch a children in the background.
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Mike 09:29 PM 06-07-2016
Originally Posted by 284878:
could it be possible that it was another provider checking you out?
Try callIng her back on another line asking for day care.

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Pestle 05:07 AM 06-08-2016
If she was trying to check me out, she really bungled it--the questions weren't general enough. She wasn't interested in finding out anything about the day care or how much I was charging per child; just if it was less than the $90/day per child the last person quoted her and how fast I could take them, and why I mentioned that she needed immunization records. (The last person must have been smarter than me. I should start quoting $90/day per child when it's someone I want to get rid of!) And she had my address but then called at the end of the day to ask for it again. Very strange.

So I just checked her Facebook page again to see if she was talking about starting a DC, but she was posting pics of her kids at the park at the other end of town yesterday, bragging about how great it's going to be working day shift now (at a major crappy minimum-wage employer here in town). I will never know why she gave me the runaround all day, but I'll take Nilla's advice and only ever reschedule once.

Fuggetabout it, and good luck to whoever ended up with her kids!
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hgonzalez 05:48 AM 06-08-2016
I had a family that rescheduled three times. I was desperate to enroll kids, so I ended up going along with it and enrolling them. The parent was the worst parent I have ever had. She insisted on attempting (note that I say attempting) to control everything, even things that did not affect her children's actual care.
I will never, ever enroll anyone again that sends off that many red flags. She was a nightmare and he 'rescheduling' indicated a lack of respect for me and my time.
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sleepinghart 06:25 AM 06-08-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
Potential DCM responds to Craigslist ad (I know, I know) with a small amount of info. I respond in kind, with a small amount of info and a request for more info. Eventually I give her my phone number. She calls, says she needs care immediately. I say she needs to come over, see the place, sign a contract. She says, 10:00 Tuesday.

10:00 comes and goes. At 12:30 she calls, says she overslept, can she come by at 2:00. Lots of children screaming in the background. Asks some more questions, says she needs care to start Wednesday.

At 2:45 she calls, says she'll be here by 4:00 if I still want to meet beforehand. I say she definitely needs to come today if she wants care tomorrow.

At 3:50 she calls, more kids yelling in the background, says she's heading out now (from half an hour away). Asks me to text my address because she left it in her email.

So it's 5:15 now, and I want nothing to do with this woman, but my biggest concern is whether this is some kind of Craigslist fraud or murder scam I haven't heard of. If so, I can't figure out how it's supposed to work.

I don't get the continual "I swear I'm on my way," though; it's not like I'm leaving a free couch on the curb. If she shows up tomorrow thinking she can drop her kids off, I'm posting the kids as freebies on Craigslist.
(^^bolding^^ by me)
~I don't think you have anything to worry about...well, at least as far as robberies, murder and such go; I think she's just a flake. I also think she could've been wanting you to eventually say that since she was having so many problems getting to your place that she could just show up with the kids tomorrow(today now) morning and drop them off. That, and she probably also had a couple more providers/places lined up for child care, and since she needed care the next day, was sorta playing it by ear and stringing each one of you along in her attempt to get the best deal while securing a spot at the same time. For example, maybe she had a less expensive than you provider that was her first choice however she wasn't sure that provider was going to give her a space so she was keeping the door open with you.

~I think if it was another provider just trying to get information they would have just done so over the phone...Face to face would be too risky, and what would be the point of exerting so much effort when she could've got the same information over the phone. Plus, even if it was another provider just trying to get info, I don't think there would have been a reason for them to string you along...They would've just shown up at the first appointed time, got the information they wanted and left I think anyway . So, no...I don't think it was another child care provider, but rather just a flaky mom that would have most likely been just as flaky once she signed on with you; and the fact that she needed daycare so soon with practically no notice also suggests that she isn't the most "together" & responsible person. Be glad- It looks like you dodged a bullet here!

Originally Posted by Thriftylady:
I don't understand people who want care the next day. I understand even less the ones who are willing to leave their kids with a stranger. But I know they are out there, I have talked to them.
~I don't either. I think a lot of it though is just ignorance...them not knowing; they don't understand how the whole process works...interviews & such, and that we as child care providers are interviewing them just as much as they are "interviewing" us, and that we may or may not decide to take on/enroll their child/ren.
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LysesKids 06:45 AM 06-08-2016
Originally Posted by Pestle:
If she was trying to check me out, she really bungled it--the questions weren't general enough. She wasn't interested in finding out anything about the day care or how much I was charging per child; just if it was less than the $90/day per child the last person quoted her and how fast I could take them, and why I mentioned that she needed immunization records. (The last person must have been smarter than me. I should start quoting $90/day per child when it's someone I want to get rid of!) And she had my address but then called at the end of the day to ask for it again. Very strange.

So I just checked her Facebook page again to see if she was talking about starting a DC, but she was posting pics of her kids at the park at the other end of town yesterday, bragging about how great it's going to be working day shift now (at a major crappy minimum-wage employer here in town). I will never know why she gave me the runaround all day, but I'll take Nilla's advice and only ever reschedule once.

Fuggetabout it, and good luck to whoever ended up with her kids!
This is why I have a "contact me" form on my website... I get certain info upfront including their ph# before they get mine; all my info, policies & rates are on the website & I ask parents read it completely thru before contacting me. I know by that first phone call if they read it or not just from the first few questions lol.

Nobody gets my address until 3 hrs before scheduled meeting and it's by text so no excuses for not having it... blow me off, I remove your name from the list and go on to the next person. BTW, my CL ads only list my website & FB daycare page... no phone # so they have to click the link to get info on the childcare home
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Ariana 08:21 AM 06-08-2016
There are a lot of people living with mental illness and drug addictions so it is possible she might be one of them. The irratic behavior is a major red flag and I feel bad for those kids. Hopefully they at least get with a decent provider.
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Pestle 10:57 AM 06-08-2016
Originally Posted by LysesKids:
This is why I have a "contact me" form on my website... I get certain info upfront including their ph# before they get mine; all my info, policies & rates are on the website & I ask parents read it completely thru before contacting me. I know by that first phone call if they read it or not just from the first few questions lol.

Nobody gets my address until 3 hrs before scheduled meeting and it's by text so no excuses for not having it... blow me off, I remove your name from the list and go on to the next person. BTW, my CL ads only list my website & FB daycare page... no phone # so they have to click the link to get info on the childcare home
All great tips! I'm still slowly getting my website up and running (although I have an active, complete Facebook business page), and I don't provide my phone number in the Craigslist ad--but the big takeaways for me on this are 1) Always get their COMPLETE contact info before sharing my own, and 2) You get one chance to reschedule, provided you contact me ahead of time.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 11:55 AM 06-08-2016
Originally Posted by hgonzalez:
I had a family that rescheduled three times. I was desperate to enroll kids, so I ended up going along with it and enrolling them. The parent was the worst parent I have ever had. She insisted on attempting (note that I say attempting) to control everything, even things that did not affect her children's actual care.
I will never, ever enroll anyone again that sends off that many red flags. She was a nightmare and he 'rescheduling' indicated a lack of respect for me and my time.
I learned this as well my first year. Don't reschedule families who show an obvious lack of respect from the getgo.

I tried to be nice this past week and rescheduled a family that didn't call or show up to the interview. They also didn't call or show up to the second, but sent an apology e-mail 1.5 hours later. Oh my. I didn't feel compelled to respond.
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