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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Disruptive Toddler HELP
hgonzalez 12:07 PM 10-11-2016
I have a child in my care this is out of control. He is 18 mos old. From the minute he walks in until the minute he leaves, he is out of control. ANY time he is put in a high chair, playpen, pack n play etc. he is screaming. ANY time he is out of those, he is hitting, throwing toys at the others' head, taking toys or throwing toys at my walls, windows, tv. Everytime I pick him up, he tries to bite my arm.
While he is eating, he screams for more when his mouth is full of unchewed food. I make him wait so he doesn't choke, he goes ballistic. When I finally give him more, he throws it across the room or on the floor. He screams for his cup, I wait till he's calm to give it to him, them he screams because he wants me to take it back. At naptime, he throws both his blanket and pacifier out and then screams for them.
When we are outside, I have to have a safe place (playpen) set up for him. He repeatedly take off his socks and shoes, pushes cars and bikes out into the road and runs out into the road himself. He never tries to ride them, and rarely appropriately plays with any outdoor toys.
I have a great playroom that is divided up for under 2s and 2 and up. I have tons of toys and tons of play equipment outside. He plays with NONE of it. He literally walks around looking for some way to be disruptive. He looks right at me before doing something, so I think he knows he is doing it.
I know some of this is normal toddler behavior, but this is literally 9 hours a day of this.
I can't afford to term him until I have a replacement, so I need some ideas on how to survive the day until that time comes.
Any ideas are appreciated!
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Ariana 12:19 PM 10-11-2016
This is definitely not normal toddler behavior. If this were me I would be asking the parents how they handle this behavior at home to get some clues as to why he is behaving this way. Then I might push for some kind of evaluation. It sounds to me that he is a very angry little guy who needs affection and positive attention.
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Blackcat31 12:27 PM 10-11-2016
Originally Posted by hgonzalez:
I have a child in my care this is out of control. He is 18 mos old. From the minute he walks in until the minute he leaves, he is out of control. ANY time he is put in a high chair, playpen, pack n play etc. he is screaming. ANY time he is out of those, he is hitting, throwing toys at the others' head, taking toys or throwing toys at my walls, windows, tv. Everytime I pick him up, he tries to bite my arm.
While he is eating, he screams for more when his mouth is full of unchewed food. I make him wait so he doesn't choke, he goes ballistic. When I finally give him more, he throws it across the room or on the floor. He screams for his cup, I wait till he's calm to give it to him, them he screams because he wants me to take it back. At naptime, he throws both his blanket and pacifier out and then screams for them.
When we are outside, I have to have a safe place (playpen) set up for him. He repeatedly take off his socks and shoes, pushes cars and bikes out into the road and runs out into the road himself. He never tries to ride them, and rarely appropriately plays with any outdoor toys.
I have a great playroom that is divided up for under 2s and 2 and up. I have tons of toys and tons of play equipment outside. He plays with NONE of it. He literally walks around looking for some way to be disruptive. He looks right at me before doing something, so I think he knows he is doing it.
I know some of this is normal toddler behavior, but this is literally 9 hours a day of this.
I can't afford to term him until I have a replacement, so I need some ideas on how to survive the day until that time comes.
Any ideas are appreciated!
I know this isn't what you want to hear but I don't think you can afford not to term him.

Some of the things you listed (especially the running into the road thing) are a bit frightening.
I've read about providers shut down on the DHS site for far less.
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hgonzalez 12:31 PM 10-11-2016
Well, I don't LET him run into the road....he tries to. He ends up spending a good portion of our outside time in the playpen for unsafe behavior, and screams.
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Cat Herder 12:32 PM 10-11-2016
I agree with BlackCat, as she typed it before I posted.

This child will need a different classroom environment. One where the play areas are divided and there is a way to prevent his access to other children or hazards, without restraint, while working on his issues.


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Cat Herder 12:38 PM 10-11-2016
Originally Posted by hgonzalez:
Well, I don't LET him run into the road....he tries to. He ends up spending a good portion of our outside time in the playpen for unsafe behavior, and screams.
I don't think it was a judgement or accusation. There is not one of us who can meet all needs.

This child simply has needs that require a different setting.
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Blackcat31 12:39 PM 10-11-2016
Originally Posted by hgonzalez:
Well, I don't LET him run into the road....he tries to. He ends up spending a good portion of our outside time in the playpen for unsafe behavior, and screams.
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
I don't think it was a judgement or accusation. There is not one of us who can meet all needs.

This child simply has needs that require a different setting.
Yes to what Catherder said...


I was NOT at all implying you let him.... I am just saying IF he was successful at ANY point, it's YOU that suffers the consequences.

I have a hard time keeping kids that put my livelihood at risk.
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KSDC 12:40 PM 10-11-2016
Originally Posted by hgonzalez:
I can't afford to term him
I'm not sure you can afford to keep him. If he is this disruptive, it might start costing you your current clients. I can't imagine that your other families like having their children in that atmosphere.


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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:51 PM 10-11-2016
This made my heart sad to read. I can't imagine the amount of stress you feel as you listen to this and try to contain the chaos with this one child while taking care of the others as well.

This child's behavior is not neurotypical. Something is going on. They need to have him evaluated and he needs a place, like a daycare center, where they can give more one on one care to him and have a playground that is completely fenced in so he cannot escape.
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daycare 06:01 PM 10-11-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Yes to what Catherder said...


I was NOT at all implying you let him.... I am just saying IF he was successful at ANY point, it's YOU that suffers the consequences.

I have a hard time keeping kids that put my livelihood at risk.
I am just saying IF he was successful at ANY point, it's YOU that suffers the consequences.

when i read your post, this is all that I could think of. what will you do if he is successful, a loss of a child and you behind bars.

someone here said it before,
when it happens at home it's an accident
when it happens at daycare, its criminal.

this sounds very serious, I really hope you can advocate for that child to get him/her to the right place.

hugs to you, like pp said, I can't imagine how you deal with this each day and you must be under so much stress.
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