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AfterSchoolMom 05:13 PM 08-12-2010
What would you do?

I had an interview recently and the Mom flat out told me that she wanted to go to the gym after work and would pick up after that. My contract states work and commute times only, and she'd be off work around 4, but wants to pick up at 5. I don't have any other "prospects" currently, and since I only do care for SA's, I'll be getting to the point soon where it will be too late to get more kids since school will be starting.

Should I allow this, or tell Mom no way?
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tmcp2001 05:23 PM 08-12-2010
I guess it would depend on if you are okay with the hours she's requesting and if you are bothered by her working out while you watch her child. I personally wouldn't care as long as she sticks to the contracted times and is generally a good dcp.

Question though, most gyms offer childcare - why can't she bring her child there? I go several times a week - mostly because I have 2 hours of childcare everyday. And it's the only childcare I get, lol!
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emosks 06:06 PM 08-12-2010
If it's in your contract then you should stick to it.

Our contract isn't like that and we do have a mom who is done with work earlier in the summer and instead of working out at lunch she will sometimes go after work. Not a big deal to us because we usually have kids until closing time and she still picks up by her normal school year time. She works at a college and there is no childcare in the gym.
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momma2girls 06:27 PM 08-12-2010
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
What would you do?

I had an interview recently and the Mom flat out told me that she wanted to go to the gym after work and would pick up after that. My contract states work and commute times only, and she'd be off work around 4, but wants to pick up at 5. I don't have any other "prospects" currently, and since I only do care for SA's, I'll be getting to the point soon where it will be too late to get more kids since school will be starting.

Should I allow this, or tell Mom no way?
DO you have a closing time? I have a closing time at 4:30- I already provide a 9 hr. day. Maybe she should work out after her husband arrives home- I had a prospect tell me her husband woke up at 3:00 and couldn't pick up at 4:30- I said fine- so she left for another daycare that was going to be open 6-6- good luck!!!
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SunflowerMama 06:29 PM 08-12-2010
I have a mom that does that. She works from home most of the time and when she does go to the office she works out on the way home. She's always here by 4:45p even after the gym so I'm fine with it.
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AfterSchoolMom 06:53 PM 08-12-2010
Well, the other two that will be in my care will be leaving by 4:30, so I'd essentially be staying open an extra half hour just for this Mom.
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Former Teacher 07:27 PM 08-12-2010
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
What would you do?

I had an interview recently and the Mom flat out told me that she wanted to go to the gym after work and would pick up after that. My contract states work and commute times only, and she'd be off work around 4, but wants to pick up at 5. I don't have any other "prospects" currently, and since I only do care for SA's, I'll be getting to the point soon where it will be too late to get more kids since school will be starting.

Should I allow this, or tell Mom no way?
I dont mean ANY disrespect or being rude but why do you even care? What would have happened if she lied to you and said she worked until 5:00 p.m.? I totally understand the contract blah blah etc etc..but if the parent is paying for the service then why should it matter? I guess that is what is so confusing to me with all these home providers

On the flip side, if you do indeed close at 4:30 then would just tell this parent no. But is it worth losing the income?
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QualiTcare 07:33 PM 08-12-2010
Originally Posted by Former Teacher:
I dont mean ANY disrespect or being rude but why do you even care? What would have happened if she lied to you and said she worked until 5:00 p.m.? I totally understand the contract blah blah etc etc..but if the parent is paying for the service then why should it matter? I guess that is what is so confusing to me with all these home providers

On the flip side, if you do indeed close at 4:30 then would just tell this parent no. But is it worth losing the income?
i agree 100%.

i used to go home and get on the treadmill before i picked up my daughter. it's not like i was out partying and having a blast - i was working out! as she got older, it wasn't a big deal - but when she was a baby, she'd be trying to climb up on it or i'd have to stop and chase her down cus i didn't use a playpen.

i worked at a center before that had lots of moms on assistance who got free childcare and they didn't even have jobs. they'd drop their kids off in their PJs and TELL US they were going home and going back to bed. now THAT is annoying, but a mom who works hard and takes good care of their child should be able to take an hour to work out without feeling guilty.
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MyAngels 08:36 PM 08-12-2010
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
What would you do?

I had an interview recently and the Mom flat out told me that she wanted to go to the gym after work and would pick up after that. My contract states work and commute times only, and she'd be off work around 4, but wants to pick up at 5. I don't have any other "prospects" currently, and since I only do care for SA's, I'll be getting to the point soon where it will be too late to get more kids since school will be starting.

Should I allow this, or tell Mom no way?
It sounds like you've already thought of this situation when you wrote commute times only into your contract, and based on that you probably should not allow it.

I, personally, wouldn't have a problem with it as long as 5:00 didn't become 5:15, then 5:30, etc. I have always had a 5:00 p.m. closing time, and am very, very clear when I interview parents that this time is not negotiable. I actually have it written into my contract that I do not charge a late fee, simply because I don't want anybody to think that it's okay to be late as long as they are willing to pay a fee. I've had excellent results from this policy.

I think I'm getting off topic here, sorry!
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mncare 08:51 PM 08-12-2010
If your contracted hours are for 4:30 then, no I would not do it. I have a closing time of 5 pm and made an exception for my neighbors and it backfired on me. I will not longer make any exceptions. I have it at that time so I can be with my child. She already hates that I do daycare, I need to dedicate my entire evenings to time with her!

But if your contracted hours are until 5 then I would go ahead. I agree, if they are a good family what does it matter as long as she is picking up on time. She may not have free childcare and doesn't want to pay extra at the gym?
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alyssyn 09:11 PM 08-12-2010
If it was me in my area, I would definately do it. With the way jobs are around here where I live, another hour wouldn't make any difference. If you needed the income.
If you don't need the income, that's a different story.
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Abigail 11:10 PM 08-12-2010
What time is your closing time? I know a lot of people have asked already, but I didn't see the response. I would be offended and switch daycare if I was told that picking up at 5:00 was unacceptable if I wanted to go to the gym after work. Her gym is probably on the way to your place and it's not like she is receiving free child care. Do you have anything else in your specific policy about your contract on times: maximum hours per day is 8 or 9 or 10? I personally just don't like the idea of "I'll only take your children if you are at work too". If I was taking a personal day, I would still want to bring my child to daycare to relax. You're still getting paid. JMHO, 5:00 is not late at all, especially around here!
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melskids 03:17 AM 08-13-2010
for me personally, i dont care where they are or what theyre doing as long as they pick up on time and pay me on time. thats just me. so for me, the question would be, do i want to change my business hours and stay open later to accomodate just her?
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AfterSchoolMom 04:44 AM 08-13-2010
Thanks everyone for your replies!

I can see both sides here. You're all right in that as long as I'm getting paid on time, I don't really care what she's doing with that time. I know how important it is to carve out time from a busy schedule to fit in exercise!

I changed my contract for the new school year from opening and closing times to work and commute times only because I've been burned. I had one family that never picked up at the same time of day (it varied by as much as two hours) each day, and another who constantly pushed my closing time. We have a busy schedule during the school year with our children and their activities, and last year my contract stated that 5:30 was the latest pickup time allowable - this particular family would pick up five or ten minutes late on a regular basis, and we'd have to race to get places on time. Not only that, but I was giving them a hefty discount. It's because of that family (who won't be coming back!) that I'm hesitant to start conceding things right at the beginning.
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momofboys 05:24 AM 08-13-2010
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
Thanks everyone for your replies!

I can see both sides here. You're all right in that as long as I'm getting paid on time, I don't really care what she's doing with that time. I know how important it is to carve out time from a busy schedule to fit in exercise!

I changed my contract for the new school year from opening and closing times to work and commute times only because I've been burned. I had one family that never picked up at the same time of day (it varied by as much as two hours) each day, and another who constantly pushed my closing time. We have a busy schedule during the school year with our children and their activities, and last year my contract stated that 5:30 was the latest pickup time allowable - this particular family would pick up five or ten minutes late on a regular basis, and we'd have to race to get places on time. Not only that, but I was giving them a hefty discount. It's because of that family (who won't be coming back!) that I'm hesitant to start conceding things right at the beginning.
I would let her do it but I totally understand your point of view. For me I also had a family that constantly pushed my closing time of 5:00. They'd run late 10-15 min on a frequent basis. And part of the time it was b/c mom said she was home doing laundry & lost her keys or was late from running to Wal-Mart. Now I had NO problem with her doing laundry/running to the store,e tc but not if she was going to be 15 min late. How many hours will the child be in your care? Because everyone says, oh you are getting paid so what difference does it make? It does make a big difference if it pushes your work hurs from 9 or 9 1/2 to 10 or more. That is a long day. Since you have contracted hours only I would make an exception (if you want to) & say since your hours technically end at 4:30 on the days you go to the gym & pick up at 5:00 I will charge an extra fee of ***X. Or at least this is what I think I would do.
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legomom922 05:26 AM 08-13-2010
I see a problem with it either. If you will be staying open late just for her, just charge her a $5 late fee, or a $10 overtime fee.
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QualiTcare 05:44 AM 08-13-2010
So if u tell her no because ur fam has activities etc then shell remember that. So say a week later a new family who works til five wants ur care which is more income for u are u going to tell them no bc ur fam has activities?if u have a strict policy then it should be strict all the time - not flexible only to ur benefit.that's a very likely scenario so if u decide to tell her no I think u should tell her u only do work n commute only n that's y. Still her lesson will b that she shouldve lied about when she gets off.
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momma2girls 05:50 AM 08-13-2010
Originally Posted by mncare:
If your contracted hours are for 4:30 then, no I would not do it. I have a closing time of 5 pm and made an exception for my neighbors and it backfired on me. I will not longer make any exceptions. I have it at that time so I can be with my child. She already hates that I do daycare, I need to dedicate my entire evenings to time with her!

But if your contracted hours are until 5 then I would go ahead. I agree, if they are a good family what does it matter as long as she is picking up on time. She may not have free childcare and doesn't want to pay extra at the gym?
I agree, all the breaks I ever gave to anyone, always backfired on me in the long run- every single one of them!!! I am now done giving any kind of breaks!!!
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momma2girls 05:52 AM 08-13-2010
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
Thanks everyone for your replies!

I can see both sides here. You're all right in that as long as I'm getting paid on time, I don't really care what she's doing with that time. I know how important it is to carve out time from a busy schedule to fit in exercise!

I changed my contract for the new school year from opening and closing times to work and commute times only because I've been burned. I had one family that never picked up at the same time of day (it varied by as much as two hours) each day, and another who constantly pushed my closing time. We have a busy schedule during the school year with our children and their activities, and last year my contract stated that 5:30 was the latest pickup time allowable - this particular family would pick up five or ten minutes late on a regular basis, and we'd have to race to get places on time. Not only that, but I was giving them a hefty discount. It's because of that family (who won't be coming back!) that I'm hesitant to start conceding things right at the beginning.
I totally agree!!! Be strong and strict!!
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DanceMom 06:16 AM 08-13-2010
Originally Posted by Former Teacher:
I dont mean ANY disrespect or being rude but why do you even care? What would have happened if she lied to you and said she worked until 5:00 p.m.? I totally understand the contract blah blah etc etc..but if the parent is paying for the service then why should it matter? I guess that is what is so confusing to me with all these home providers

On the flip side, if you do indeed close at 4:30 then would just tell this parent no. But is it worth losing the income?
I was going to ask the same thing..I know my parents would lie to me every time and tell me they just got off work. My hours are 7-5 - within those hours you can do whatever you want..you dont even have to be at work..do I think that sucks for your kid that you send them to daycare and have the day off, yes...but its not my place to judge....my service is 7-5 - go shopping for all I care
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DCMomOf3 06:51 AM 08-13-2010
Originally Posted by Former Teacher:
I dont mean ANY disrespect or being rude but why do you even care? What would have happened if she lied to you and said she worked until 5:00 p.m.? I totally understand the contract blah blah etc etc..but if the parent is paying for the service then why should it matter? I guess that is what is so confusing to me with all these home providers

On the flip side, if you do indeed close at 4:30 then would just tell this parent no. But is it worth losing the income?
I agree. I don't even know if that would be an acceptable reason to refuse care. Can you legally ask, "What will you be doing while I am being paid to take care of your child?"

If she is asking you to work past your hours of operations is a different story.
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MommyMuffin 07:34 AM 08-13-2010
If you are willing to be open till five and dont want to lose the money then, when I gave her the contract to sign I would have it put in there the times (highlighted) that she would p/u 5:00 also while you are going over the contract tell her that her child needs to be picked up by 5:00 and if there is problems with late pick up you have no choice but to terminate. I would also add an additional fee for the extra 1/2 hour. Lots of parents are willing to pay a little more. Make sure it is worth your while.
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misol 07:44 AM 08-13-2010
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
Thanks everyone for your replies!

I can see both sides here. You're all right in that as long as I'm getting paid on time, I don't really care what she's doing with that time. I know how important it is to carve out time from a busy schedule to fit in exercise!

I changed my contract for the new school year from opening and closing times to work and commute times only because I've been burned. I had one family that never picked up at the same time of day (it varied by as much as two hours) each day, and another who constantly pushed my closing time. We have a busy schedule during the school year with our children and their activities, and last year my contract stated that 5:30 was the latest pickup time allowable - this particular family would pick up five or ten minutes late on a regular basis, and we'd have to race to get places on time. Not only that, but I was giving them a hefty discount. It's because of that family (who won't be coming back!) that I'm hesitant to start conceding things right at the beginning.
My honest opinion is that I think that you should trust your instincts and stick to your contract. Remember, you added those terms to your contract for a reason. This will be the only child you have in care for the last half hour of the day. In the back of your mind it will probably bug you to no end knowing that the mom is not working while this kid is the last kid in your care. I think it would be an easier pill to swallow if you didn't have to stay open longer for this family. I would advise against it.
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Lilbutterflie 08:03 AM 08-13-2010
Maybe you could agree, but add an additional price since you are staying later? Maybe $5-$10 more per week? See if it's worth it to her. I'd be willing to stay open later if I was being compensated for it. Since this is outside of your contract guidelines, she will have to pay extra for the extra service.
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misol 08:55 AM 08-13-2010
Originally Posted by Lilbutterflie:
Maybe you could agree, but add an additional price since you are staying later? Maybe $5-$10 more per week? See if it's worth it to her. I'd be willing to stay open later if I was being compensated for it. Since this is outside of your contract guidelines, she will have to pay extra for the extra service.
Yes. Maybe the price should be so high that she will decide it's not worth the extra money and just pick up after work!
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laundryduchess@yahoo.com 09:11 AM 08-13-2010
yet another reason I dont have open or close times OR commute times in my contract. I have contracted hours. I dont give a whoopity doo what they are doing, napping, working, taking a class or wrangeling stray pheasants from a farmers barn. They pay from such and such to such and such,.. period. If they are contracted from 4 to noon,.. then I dont care what they are doing as long as I can reach them.
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professionalmom 08:02 PM 08-14-2010
Originally Posted by misol:
My honest opinion is that I think that you should trust your instincts and stick to your contract. Remember, you added those terms to your contract for a reason. This will be the only child you have in care for the last half hour of the day. In the back of your mind it will probably bug you to no end knowing that the mom is not working while this kid is the last kid in your care. I think it would be an easier pill to swallow if you didn't have to stay open longer for this family. I would advise against it.
I agree that she should stick to her contract because she did put that in her contract for a reason. I think some people assume that those of us who had this type of contract did it because it was in some way "inconvenient for US", when the main reason I had it in mine was to entice the parent to spend as much time as possible with their child(ren). I wanted to facilitate the amount of time that the parent spent with his or her child(ren), so I did not see this as a "restriction" that I was placing on the parent. I saw it as encouraging the parent / child relationship and bonding. I am thinking that the OP put it in her contract for the same reason. But I could be wrong. But if I'm right, then she would be enabling someone to do something that she (the provider) does not support - spending more time away then is necessary. And it's not a judgment of the provider toward the parent, it's just a difference in parenting style. And I think the parent and provider should have the same (or similar) parenting styles for it to truly be a good fit and a positive experience for everyone (privder, parent, and child).
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QualiTcare 10:27 PM 08-14-2010
Originally Posted by professionalmom:
I agree that she should stick to her contract because she did put that in her contract for a reason. I think some people assume that those of us who had this type of contract did it because it was in some way "inconvenient for US", when the main reason I had it in mine was to entice the parent to spend as much time as possible with their child(ren). I wanted to facilitate the amount of time that the parent spent with his or her child(ren), so I did not see this as a "restriction" that I was placing on the parent. I saw it as encouraging the parent / child relationship and bonding. I am thinking that the OP put it in her contract for the same reason. But I could be wrong. But if I'm right, then she would be enabling someone to do something that she (the provider) does not support - spending more time away then is necessary. And it's not a judgment of the provider toward the parent, it's just a difference in parenting style. And I think the parent and provider should have the same (or similar) parenting styles for it to truly be a good fit and a positive experience for everyone (privder, parent, and child).
i don't think taking an hour to work out is going to affect any parent/child bonding process - jmo.
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professionalmom 06:54 PM 08-15-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
i don't think taking an hour to work out is going to affect any parent/child bonding process - jmo.
True. But then it will become "oh, I have to run to the grocery store", "oh, I have to run this errand", etc. The next thing you know, the child is in care an extra 2 hours a day while mom runs around doing other stuff. It's a snowball effect. Then where do you draw the line? I only say this because I have seen it happen far too much and it is sad when it does happen.

Plus, if this mom was a subsidy recipient, the state (here in MI) wouldn't pay for child care while the mom is working out. I actually used DHS's guidelines in my daycare, but of course, that was pretty easy since most of my clients were subsidy recipients, so if DHS didn't pay for that time, they couldn't be there because the parents couldn't afford to pay for it themselves.
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QualiTcare 07:31 PM 08-15-2010
Originally Posted by professionalmom:
True. But then it will become "oh, I have to run to the grocery store", "oh, I have to run this errand", etc. The next thing you know, the child is in care an extra 2 hours a day while mom runs around doing other stuff. It's a snowball effect. Then where do you draw the line? I only say this because I have seen it happen far too much and it is sad when it does happen.

Plus, if this mom was a subsidy recipient, the state (here in MI) wouldn't pay for child care while the mom is working out. I actually used DHS's guidelines in my daycare, but of course, that was pretty easy since most of my clients were subsidy recipients, so if DHS didn't pay for that time, they couldn't be there because the parents couldn't afford to pay for it themselves.
i dunno - using daycare to work out and to run errands are really different. i would leave my daughter in daycare to work out. have you ever tried lifting weights or being on a treadmill with a baby?

it's kinda like comparing going to the obgyn and using daycare to going to the grocery store.
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professionalmom 09:11 PM 08-15-2010
Originally Posted by QualiTcare:
i dunno - using daycare to work out and to run errands are really different. i would leave my daughter in daycare to work out. have you ever tried lifting weights or being on a treadmill with a baby?

it's kinda like comparing going to the obgyn and using daycare to going to the grocery store.
They may be different, but it's the train of thought that I was referring to. For instance, if the provider is willing to make an exception and stay open another hour so the mom can go to the gym, then there will come a day when the mom needs to run a quick errand and will think, "oh, DCP didn't mind staying open for an extra hour for me, so another 10 minutes won't matter while I go do this one errand." Then the next time it may be an errand that will only take 15 minutes, then 20, and so on until there is another hour tacked on just for errands. The train of thought is, "you didn't mind giving an exception for this, so why would it matter if you made another tiny exception." Then it becomes, "you didn't mind this or that, so what's the problem NOW?"

Plus, by setting the relationship up in the beginning with making this parent your "special" client that you are giving exceptions to, you are saying that the contract is completely negotiable and that the mom can changes things at HER will, not the provider's. And as another provider has pointed out, when you give an exception, the parent does see it as an "exception". The parent sees it as "THE" normal terms. Then they may (in my experience, WILL) try to get you to bend these terms.
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QualiTcare 09:28 PM 08-15-2010
Originally Posted by professionalmom:
They may be different, but it's the train of thought that I was referring to. For instance, if the provider is willing to make an exception and stay open another hour so the mom can go to the gym, then there will come a day when the mom needs to run a quick errand and will think, "oh, DCP didn't mind staying open for an extra hour for me, so another 10 minutes won't matter while I go do this one errand." Then the next time it may be an errand that will only take 15 minutes, then 20, and so on until there is another hour tacked on just for errands. The train of thought is, "you didn't mind giving an exception for this, so why would it matter if you made another tiny exception." Then it becomes, "you didn't mind this or that, so what's the problem NOW?"

Plus, by setting the relationship up in the beginning with making this parent your "special" client that you are giving exceptions to, you are saying that the contract is completely negotiable and that the mom can changes things at HER will, not the provider's. And as another provider has pointed out, when you give an exception, the parent does see it as an "exception". The parent sees it as "THE" normal terms. Then they may (in my experience, WILL) try to get you to bend these terms.
i dunno - the mom did mention it during the interview so that tells me she's not oblivious to the provider's schedule. otherwise, she would've just mentioned it later or showed up late. errands can be done once a week or during a lunch break. doctor's appointments are something that comes up every blue moon. working out is something a lot of people do every day and it can't be done during lunch if you don't want to go back to work sweaty. i guess everyone's opinion would depend on whether or not they work out too. some people don't and they wouldn't understand. some people do it every day so they'd be able to understand it. whether or not they take advantage of the situation is up to the provider. if the time is 5 then it's 5. if they want to go shopping then they can skip the workout and pick up by 5.
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AfterSchoolMom 05:27 AM 08-16-2010
I'm going to allow it. It looks like I won't be full, so I don't want to lose them. I DO work out, so I can definitely understand her position, and it's not as if I'll be providing care until dinner time. However, this is the ONLY exception they'll get from me, and I'm going to make sure that they understand that. There will be no extra ten minutes, other errands, etc. I did the contract with the extra time built in, so pick up time is pick up time, whether she's exercising, running errands, or street performing - I don't care, as long as she picks up on time.
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MyAngels 06:33 AM 08-16-2010
Originally Posted by AfterSchoolMom:
I'm going to allow it. It looks like I won't be full, so I don't want to lose them. I DO work out, so I can definitely understand her position, and it's not as if I'll be providing care until dinner time. However, this is the ONLY exception they'll get from me, and I'm going to make sure that they understand that. There will be no extra ten minutes, other errands, etc. I did the contract with the extra time built in, so pick up time is pick up time, whether she's exercising, running errands, or street performing - I don't care, as long as she picks up on time.
An "Oh, and for the days when you are not at the gym I'd expect you to pick up immediately after work" couldn't hurt either! lol
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Childminder 07:15 AM 08-16-2010
Charge overtime fees (time and a half) for anytime over contracted hours. Personally I don't care what they do I am being paid for watching their child. Period.
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