Default Style Register
Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCM Wants Me to Fail?
Unregistered 05:38 PM 09-07-2016
I have a new dcg, a year and a half old. At the interview, dcm asked odd questions - "Do you practice fire and tornado drills? How do you wash down your changing table?" And then she ignored all of the normal questions I get, food, sleep, curriculum, outdoor play...It almost felt like "gotcha" questions.

Dcm AND dcd make dropoff seem like a total bummer to dcg, new this week. "Oh, poor girl, you will get used to it..." That type of thing. Grrr...

Then today I get a text asking if dcg was eating and drinking today, because she drank 2 glasses of milk, and 1 glass of juice at home. I said, "Yes, but it is over 90 degrees and humid today, so keep that in mind."

Dcm's response, "Yeah, it takes a lot of energy to cry all day," implying dcg cried here all day.

I don't know if this is a vent or a help, but I feel like dcm and dcd want dcg to hate it here. What the heck?
Reply
LysesKids 06:49 PM 09-07-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a new dcg, a year and a half old. At the interview, dcm asked odd questions - "Do you practice fire and tornado drills? How do you wash down your changing table?" And then she ignored all of the normal questions I get, food, sleep, curriculum, outdoor play...It almost felt like "gotcha" questions.

Dcm AND dcd make dropoff seem like a total bummer to dcg, new this week. "Oh, poor girl, you will get used to it..." That type of thing. Grrr...

Then today I get a text asking if dcg was eating and drinking today, because she drank 2 glasses of milk, and 1 glass of juice at home. I said, "Yes, but it is over 90 degrees and humid today, so keep that in mind."

Dcm's response, "Yeah, it takes a lot of energy to cry all day," implying dcg cried here all day.

I don't know if this is a vent or a help, but I feel like dcm and dcd want dcg to hate it here. What the heck?
I would term... immediately; I do not keep clients on that can't trust me or my judgement AND from what I see already, they will try & sabotage you in every way possible... they didn't even give it one day before the bitching started & personally I don't play that game. BTW, I keep all my policies online & parents know from the get go how I work so playing me works against them
Reply
Unregistered 06:54 PM 09-07-2016
I would term, too. They seem like liars. If she's not crying with you, she's not crying at home about being there.
Reply
LysesKids 06:57 PM 09-07-2016
Added note.. One way to defeat that a kid was unhappy all day is to text pics of them happy & smiling with new friends; this will kill the child was crying all day down the tubes quickly
Reply
Unregistered 07:12 PM 09-07-2016
Originally Posted by LysesKids:
Added note.. One way to defeat that a kid was unhappy all day is to text pics of them happy & smiling with new friends; this will kill the child was crying all day down the tubes quickly
I totally did this! I just don't understand what they are thinking. Sure, dcg was upset a little. It's an adjustment. Did she cry all day? Nope. In fact, she's one of my best adjustments I've had.

I am considering terming. It's just odd behavior. She's part time, Mon-Wed, so this week I only had 2 days with her. I will give a few more days, but one more incident and I have to let them go. I don't like "gotcha" behavior, or not trusting me.
Reply
LysesKids 07:16 PM 09-07-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I totally did this! I just don't understand what they are thinking. Sure, dcg was upset a little. It's an adjustment. Did she cry all day? Nope. In fact, she's one of my best adjustments I've had.

I am considering terming. It's just odd behavior. She's part time, Mon-Wed, so this week I only had 2 days with her. I will give a few more days, but one more incident and I have to let them go. I don't like "gotcha" behavior, or not trusting me.
The fact they still bitch after a happy pic would say "nothing will make me happy"... Term now, not after one more incident. I have one that just started... mom couldn't be happier even though little bit started later than my other babes; happy as a clam and glad she found me... not tearing me down first day even after bubala cried the first hr; I have a happy pic on first day also
Reply
Unregistered 08:09 PM 09-07-2016
I could be wrong but if it's starting already it's gonna go from bad to worse.
Reply
Unregistered 12:17 AM 09-08-2016
Oh ick! The "crying all day" passive aggressive remark! I wouldn't mind the fire drill or changing mat question but the other stuff is ridiculous.

I'm not one to easily confront people but I'd have to come right out with a "we need to talk" and be up front with basic, "what is going on here" questions.

I hate game playing and couldn't stand it. If talking with the parent didn't work I'd have to term too.
Reply
Josiegirl 03:18 AM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Oh ick! The "crying all day" passive aggressive remark! I wouldn't mind the fire drill or changing mat question but the other stuff is ridiculous.

I'm not one to easily confront people but I'd have to come right out with a "we need to talk" and be up front with basic, "what is going on here" questions.

I hate game playing and couldn't stand it. If talking with the parent didn't work I'd have to term too.
THIS exactly!! Talk with dcm and lay it all out for her, plain and simple. To me, it's obvious dcm is the one with the problem, maybe that's how she feels about going to work every day and is passing it onto little one. Geez.....
Reply
Unregistered 03:48 AM 09-08-2016
I'm wondering if dcm wants dcg to be miserable so she can stay at home with her? That's my guess anyway. Dcm has started going to school, so she doesn't have a great way to just up and quit without some consequences.

If I had to guess - and this is just a gut feeling - I would say dcm wants to be a sahm (dcg has an older brother who is 6, and dcm has been home all this time).

I'm going to address the text she sent me. I have some sympathy because leaving your child forbthe first time sucks, but her attitude is crazy. I have had a similar parent who after a talk ended up being one of my best parents. So one more chance. Somehiw, I don't see this dcm reacting well to me calling her out on her crap though
Reply
daycarediva 09:41 AM 09-08-2016
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I'm wondering if dcm wants dcg to be miserable so she can stay at home with her? That's my guess anyway. Dcm has started going to school, so she doesn't have a great way to just up and quit without some consequences.

If I had to guess - and this is just a gut feeling - I would say dcm wants to be a sahm (dcg has an older brother who is 6, and dcm has been home all this time).

I'm going to address the text she sent me. I have some sympathy because leaving your child forbthe first time sucks, but her attitude is crazy. I have had a similar parent who after a talk ended up being one of my best parents. So one more chance. Somehiw, I don't see this dcm reacting well to me calling her out on her crap though
Yup. Call her out. Dcm, dcg is adjusting great! Do you have some reason to assume dcg is unhappy here? Are you unhappy with my care? I know you would prefer to be home with her, but she loves X, Y, or Z and will become an independent, outgoing, social little toddler in no time. If it happens again, term. I have a trial period for a reason.
Reply
Reply Up