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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Everything He Does Just Annoys Me!!!!
Kcole1075 12:01 PM 02-12-2014
All my kids annoy me witg little things. But everything this one dcb does annoys me.

He is 4 and has a lot of issues here with listening, behavior and having accidents. I fight with this kid so much to get on the same page as everyone else that him even being here is beginning to annoy me.

Even when he is having a good day here I find myself annoyed with him. And its little things like his constant use of sound effects and noise with his mouth. He constantly has to make a noise no matter what he is doing.. Or the fact that he has to copy everything the other kids are doing. These are things kids just do and I know it. But I just cant deal with it with him.


Rant over
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Josiegirl 12:04 PM 02-12-2014
Is there any way you can let him go? It's not really fair to either of you to have a situation like that. I've had kids that do things that annoy me but it sounds like his whole being is annoying to you.
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melilley 12:05 PM 02-12-2014
Oh my word... Today I was just thinking this about one of my dcb's!
He is so slobbery, eats by grabbing a fist full of food and shoving it in his mouth, is starting to look at me and smile and do what he knows not to do, and a few other things. It just bugs me to no end! And to top it off his mom bugs me too, I like dad, but mom is of a strange nature.
I feel kind of bad talking about him, but it feels good to get it out!
You are not alone!
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Annalee 12:14 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by Kcole1075:
All my kids annoy me witg little things. But everything this one dcb does annoys me.

He is 4 and has a lot of issues here with listening, behavior and having accidents. I fight with this kid so much to get on the same page as everyone else that him even being here is beginning to annoy me.

Even when he is having a good day here I find myself annoyed with him. And its little things like his constant use of sound effects and noise with his mouth. He constantly has to make a noise no matter what he is doing.. Or the fact that he has to copy everything the other kids are doing. These are things kids just do and I know it. But I just cant deal with it with him.


Rant over
I think we all have one of those kids who we just do not jive with. In my instance it is a little girl...just gets on my nerves. She is very spoiled and the baby in the fam so everyone caters to her and she expects the other children and I to do the same....
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thetoddlerwhisper 12:21 PM 02-12-2014
we have 2 sisters like that. theyre 4 and 2 and they drive me bonkers. you say something and the 4 yr old will roll her eyes she cant sit still and she has one of those high pitched whiny voices.. the 2yr old just ignores everything you say or smiles and does it anyway the 2yr old has the same whiny voice too......
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providerandmomof4 12:27 PM 02-12-2014
I have felt this way about several dcks. I always knew that it wasnt them personally. Every one of them had sweet, funny, cuteness too, but....they did things that drove me and my family members crazy. Cause they werent my kids and I was spending sometimes 50 hrs a week with them. They were tired of dc and Iwas tired of them. I wont do those hrs anymore, and funny how I dont feel near as annoyed.
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SunshineMama 12:36 PM 02-12-2014
I had a kid like that for 2 years. Everything got on my nerves. His voice gave me a headache. I didn't know how bad it really was until he went off to school. Now I wonder how I put up with it for that long!
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rosieteddy 12:42 PM 02-12-2014
I find that in February everyone is annoying.My sister and I have a saying never make big decesions in this month.It is a short one but so loooooooong.Just today I fantasized about quitting and moving somewhere warm.The kids are of the wall,my husband is "working"from home and my adult sons hours are cut to four hours a day ending just as I put the kids down.AGGGGGGGGGGGH .wHAT DO THEY NOT UNDERSTAND ABOUT GGGGGGET OUT BETWEEN 1 AND 3;30. I find that I have to look away sometimes when the dckids start pushing my buttons. Also it doesn't hurt to have a secret pocket full of chocolate ...............Hang in there.
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craftymissbeth 12:53 PM 02-12-2014
I put myself in time out several times today... so that I could get away from one particular dcg who screams all day long... and so I could down a Diet Pepsi each time

I started advertising today so that I can term her. I just cannot bond with her. I find my brain rolling its eyes at her every time she makes the loud "eh! eh! eh!" sound, she eats fistfuls of food at a time, she grinds her front teeth, and she screams if anyone so much as looks at her funny.

I'm just not the right fit for her. It's sad and my pocket is going to take a huge hit terming her... but I'll regret it if I keep her.
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daycare 01:07 PM 02-12-2014
Sorry not trying to sound rude,but I agree with letting this child go. It's not your fault, some people just don't click. Including children with adults.

when children experience shared positive interactions it leads to a positive relationship with you, provides less stress for all of the kids in the environment and helps open them to learning.

Our emotions with the children are contagious. if the child is crabby and we let them work our nerves, we become crabby and it affects the whole group.

I know its hard to break this cycle of letting this child annoy you like this, but its very important that the you and the child have a strong connection, this helps them feel safe, confident, they learn what to expect from you and learn how to behave.

some kids just never adapt to us and our program. If I were you I would let this child go where they could be somewhere they are understood.

I have had a child like this before and it took me a full 3 months to turn it around and make a strong bond with them. He is now one of my favorite children.,

Perhaps if not letting him go is an option, you could take the time to try to bond with him so that you have a more positive experience and interactions for him which will benefit your whole group.
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lilcupcakes09 01:07 PM 02-12-2014
I have one of these too! Glad it isn't just me!
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Kcole1075 01:08 PM 02-12-2014
I could term him. But it would be my first term. And I feel like I am failing.

He is an only child and is still the baby so he gets everything done for him. So I have to fight with him on picking up his mess, putting on his own shoes pulling up his own pants, and so on. So after he throws a fit about having to do it and it being to hard or whatever I am just so frustrated that he begins to annoy me with little things.
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daycare 01:36 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by Kcole1075:
I could term him. But it would be my first term. And I feel like I am failing.

He is an only child and is still the baby so he gets everything done for him. So I have to fight with him on picking up his mess, putting on his own shoes pulling up his own pants, and so on. So after he throws a fit about having to do it and it being to hard or whatever I am just so frustrated that he begins to annoy me with little things.
you are not failing....you are doing what you know how to do.

if you know he is struggling with these things then maybe you can come up with a plan/game to motivate him to try and succeed. If you can create positive interactions with him he will want more and the more he gets the more he will want to behave and try for you. children are eager to learn by nature.

this kid may be stressed out that he is being asked to do something he can't or is not motivated to so he shuts down or acts up.
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daycare 01:39 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by daycare:
you are not failing....you are doing what you know how to do.

if you know he is struggling with these things then maybe you can come up with a plan/game to motivate him to try and succeed. If you can create positive interactions with him he will want more and the more he gets the more he will want to behave and try for you. children are eager to learn by nature.

this kid may be stressed out that he is being asked to do something he can't or is not motivated to so he shuts down or acts up.
try working with him on the clothing issue when you are not in a transition time, like needing to toilet, etc
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Blackcat31 02:15 PM 02-12-2014
Ok, I am going to offer another perspective.

I would NOT term him. Not liking or clicking with a child is just part of the deal. Do you think all teachers in Kindy click or really like their students?

Probably not.

I think whether or not you term him is dependent on whether or not YOU are capable of treating him the same as everyone else.

I always have my favorite kids and my not-so-favorite kids. I can't help that. I am human.

BUT, I treat them all the same. Whether Joey annoys me or not has no bearing on the treatment and/or care he receives from me.

Joey has NO clue that I probably don't care for him as much as I do Billy.

Billy likes him though and in the grand scheme of things, that is what is important.

Do you feel you treat him differently than others?
Do the other kids treat him as a friend and as an peer?

Depending on those answers you will know the right thing to do.
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Play Care 02:23 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Ok, I am going to offer another perspective.

I would NOT term him. Not liking or clicking with a child is just part of the deal. Do you think all teachers in Kindy click or really like their students?

Probably not.

I think whether or not you term him is dependent on whether or not YOU are capable of treating him the same as everyone else.

I always have my favorite kids and my not-so-favorite kids. I can't help that. I am human.

BUT, I treat them all the same. Whether Joey annoys me or not has no bearing on the treatment and/or care he receives from me.

Joey has NO clue that I probably don't care for him as much as I do Billy.

Billy likes him though and in the grand scheme of things, that is what is important.

Do you feel you treat him differently than others?
Do the other kids treat him as a friend and as an peer?

Depending on those answers you will know the right thing to do.

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daycare 02:23 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Ok, I am going to offer another perspective.

I would NOT term him. Not liking or clicking with a child is just part of the deal. Do you think all teachers in Kindy click or really like their students?

Probably not.

I think whether or not you term him is dependent on whether or not YOU are capable of treating him the same as everyone else.

I always have my favorite kids and my not-so-favorite kids. I can't help that. I am human.

BUT, I treat them all the same. Whether Joey annoys me or not has no bearing on the treatment and/or care he receives from me.

Joey has NO clue that I probably don't care for him as much as I do Billy.

Billy likes him though and in the grand scheme of things, that is what is important.

Do you feel you treat him differently than others?
Do the other kids treat him as a friend and as an peer?

Depending on those answers you will know the right thing to do.
she said she gets annoyed so I take that the other children are aware of this. I normally agree with you BC, but I would not keep a child that I could not click with. Bonding with a young child is extremely important. Children know when they are being treated different and other children are aware of it too. they can tell by our facial expressions change of tone in our voices, etc
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Blackcat31 02:32 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by daycare:
she said she gets annoyed so I take that the other children are aware of this. I normally agree with you BC, but I would not keep a child that I could not click with. Bonding with a young child is extremely important. Children know when they are being treated different and other children are aware of it too.
I get annoyed with kids too. HOW I manage that annoyance is the point.

Just because I am annoyed, doesn't mean others can tell or see it.

I don't like a couple of my daycare parents but I guarantee you they have NO idea. I am polite, professional and friendly with all my parents.

I also don't think kids are quick to pick up on those things all the time. Some kids are good at reading adults but others aren't.

I think it is ALL dependent on how a person displays (or doesn't display) their annoyance that makes a difference.

I also disagree on the bonding thing. I do not bond with my DCK's in the same sense as a parent would. I have a relationship with my DCK's based on routine, trust, consistency and guidance but not the kind of bond that a parent would have with their child.

I have a child in my care right now that I do not care for. Not a naughty kid. Just a kid I don't "click" with. They have several really annoying behaviors but I display the same excited, enthusiasm for that child when they accomplish something as I do for everyone else.

Maybe some people aren't as good at that type of thing, but like I said....it's something ALL teachers do.

So I stand by what I said. Terming this kid would be HIGHLY dependent on how the other kids treat him and on how much or little the provider "shows" her annoyance of him.
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daycare 02:46 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I get annoyed with kids too. HOW I manage that annoyance is the point.

Just because I am annoyed, doesn't mean others can tell or see it.

I don't like a couple of my daycare parents but I guarantee you they have NO idea. I am polite, professional and friendly with all my parents.

I also don't think kids are quick to pick up on those things all the time. Some kids are good at reading adults but others aren't.

I think it is ALL dependent on how a person displays (or doesn't display) their annoyance that makes a difference.

I also disagree on the bonding thing. I do not bond with my DCK's in the same sense as a parent would. I have a relationship with my DCK's based on routine, trust, consistency and guidance but not the kind of bond that a parent would have with their child.

I have a child in my care right now that I do not care for. Not a naughty kid. Just a kid I don't "click" with. They have several really annoying behaviors but I display the same excited, enthusiasm for that child when they accomplish something as I do for everyone else.

Maybe some people aren't as good at that type of thing, but like I said....it's something ALL teachers do.

So I stand by what I said. Terming this kid would be HIGHLY dependent on how the other kids treat him and on how much or little the provider "shows" her annoyance of him.
I see what you are saying. the fake it to until you make it. BUT parents are at our door for 5-10 minutes I can do that no problem. But the kids we have all day long.

When the kids have a connection to us, it helps the children to feel safe and secure, as well as giving her a sense of belonging. When we do this,it sets them up to be more successful socially and emotionally. For most of these kids we are their first experience of navigating through the world without mommy and daddy there.

When we have a good bond with these children, chances are they will be more excited to go to our house. they will listen better, feel more comfortable in their environment and become more successful in it.

In my classes, I have been taught that as these children's first teacher (provider)
connection is an important one for longterm academic achievement. From what I have read and taught children with a secure attachment to their first teachers feel more confident, are more successful at learning, and show increased kindergarten readiness.

I know that each person runs their program differently and I think that if you are able to do the fake it until you make it TOTAL control of your emotions then no issue, but I don't know too many people that can do that. even my own children tell me daily, OMG my teacher totally lost it today on this kid.......
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Blackcat31 02:58 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by daycare:
I see what you are saying. the fake it to until you make it. BUT parents are at our door for 5-10 minutes I can do that no problem. But the kids we have all day long.

When the kids have a connection to us, it helps the children to feel safe and secure, as well as giving her a sense of belonging. When we do this,it sets them up to be more successful socially and emotionally. For most of these kids we are their first experience of navigating through the world without mommy and daddy there.

When we have a good bond with these children, chances are they will be more excited to go to our house. they will listen better, feel more comfortable in their environment and become more successful in it.

In my classes, I have been taught that as these children's first teacher (provider)
connection is an important one for longterm academic achievement. From what I have read and taught children with a secure attachment to their first teachers feel more confident, are more successful at learning, and show increased kindergarten readiness.

I know that each person runs their program differently and I think that if you are able to do the fake it until you make it TOTAL control of your emotions then no issue, but I don't know too many people that can do that. even my own children tell me daily, OMG my teacher totally lost it today on this kid.......
Building a secure attachment with a child doesn't mean having to love or even like them.

The faking it part is something we should all learn.

You can't term every kid that annoys you.

Like I said before, it's all in how you display your personal feelings.

I serve peas. My DCK's love them. I loathe them but NONE of my kids know that.

I am not arguing about whether or not we make a difference in kids' lives as their first teacher or not, I am merely pointing out that the provider doesn't HAVE to term a child that annoys her simply because they annoy her.
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daycare 03:01 PM 02-12-2014
i agree with that to a point. I guess I find a way to build strong bonds with my DCKs, I do love them, not like a parent, but as a friend.

I said term because of the last sentence she wrote that she that she just can't deal with him. If a child has driven you to that, then you should let them go......
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craftymissbeth 03:20 PM 02-12-2014
I termed mine today. It was my first real term actually.

In my case, I was so annoyed by this child I couldn't even force myself to fake it any longer. She doesn't know I'm annoyed by her, but the taking it was draining me and I was starting to loathe my own business.
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daycarediva 04:16 PM 02-12-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Ok, I am going to offer another perspective.

I would NOT term him. Not liking or clicking with a child is just part of the deal. Do you think all teachers in Kindy click or really like their students?

Probably not.

I think whether or not you term him is dependent on whether or not YOU are capable of treating him the same as everyone else.

I always have my favorite kids and my not-so-favorite kids. I can't help that. I am human.

BUT, I treat them all the same. Whether Joey annoys me or not has no bearing on the treatment and/or care he receives from me.

Joey has NO clue that I probably don't care for him as much as I do Billy.

Billy likes him though and in the grand scheme of things, that is what is important.

Do you feel you treat him differently than others?
Do the other kids treat him as a friend and as an peer?

Depending on those answers you will know the right thing to do.
I have one dcb I don't have a connection ( or click ) with. Nobody has a clue.

When this happens to me, I do a lot of faking it til I make it. I treat them like they're my best bud, spend more 1:1 time, and really try to find things I like about them.

Sometimes it works....sometimes not.
Originally Posted by craftymissbeth:
I termed mine today. It was my first real term actually.

In my case, I was so annoyed by this child I couldn't even force myself to fake it any longer. She doesn't know I'm annoyed by her, but the taking it was draining me and I was starting to loathe my own business.
This is when I would term in these conditions, when I was miserable or just couldn't hide my annoyance.
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Kcole1075 10:10 AM 02-13-2014
Both my parents are teachers so I totally understand the whole you can't get rid of kids because they annoy you.

I have been faking it a lot with him. I don't think the kids or dcb can tell he annoys me. But he annoys them so they might be able to tell.

He is a part timer here so I deal with him the first 3 days of the week. I am so relaxed tge rest of yhe week.
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Tags:annoyed, discipline - positive, discipline plan, probation - length, provider - burnout risk, terminate
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