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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DS Riles Up The Whole Group
LeslieG 11:02 AM 01-02-2018
I feel so overwhelmed right now.

I did daycare for 3 years before having children of my own. It ran very smoothly and I never had major behavior issues with the kids.

I now have an almost 3 year old DS and he makes things much more difficult. He doesn't always listen to me (because I'm his mom) and he riles up the whole group (I have mostly 2 year old boys). It turns into chaos with the whole group very quickly every day.. and on top of all that, I have a 3 month old DS that needs my attention a lot during the day too!

Has anyone gone through a similar situation?
hwichlaz 11:15 AM 01-02-2018
I did, and I found I had to be tougher on my own kids. If your regulations allow, I'd send him to play by himself in his room when he's like that. When my kids got a bit older I'd send them outside to run laps around the house.
daycarediva 11:16 AM 01-02-2018
Only every daycare provider ever. Almost all of us will agree our OWN children were the most challenging.

That being said, my solution was to enroll ds in part time preschool elsewhere. In summers, we did part time camps of his choosing. It gave him a break from the daycare kids and having to share mom, and gave me a much needed break.
hwichlaz 11:18 AM 01-02-2018
While I was really tough on my own kids, I also did what I could to make it easier on them. they got one on one time during naptime. When they were small enough to still need naps this meant offsetting their naptime by about an hour. It was hard on me, but they are only little for so long.
storybookending 11:21 AM 01-02-2018
Separate from the group of you can. Be consistent about it. Every time he acts up send him to his room, move him to another areas with quiet time activities etc..

A lot of providers end up making other care arrangements for their kids when they reach the ages of 3-4. Are there any morning programs he could attended such as a 3K program or something in your area? A lot of churches around here run programs such as these (typically 3ish hours long) and I have two cousins who are also providers and ended up sending their kids out of the house for awhile to attend such programs.

It’s also possible he’s acting out and testing you because of the new(ish) baby. Be clear on expectations and be firm and consistent about them.
Farmerswife 06:17 AM 01-03-2018
My DS is 9 and still drives me crazy when he's home. He doesn't do anything terrible, just likes to be in charge. One thing I have learned is not to "punish" him in front of the other kids and send him in another room during drop off/pick up. A few years ago, before my son was in school, I had a parent make digs that his son was learning my sons bad behavior. Both of his kids were very disrespectful, did not play nice, threw tantrums, etc. I actually had other parents comment about them. They are the only family I have ever termed. Anyway, I do not want parents putting blame on my child for their child's bad behavior. So, I take my son into the hallway to talk to him about his behavior so the other kids can't go home and repeat what I say to him.
TheMisplacedMidwestMom 08:55 AM 01-03-2018
My ds is 3... I feel your pain. For us I've found that I have to extra consistent with him (if he gets an inch he'll take a mile). Most effective so far are making him my shadow, or sending him upstairs to play in his room or our living room for a break. There are lots of days that are just exhausting, and I've considered sending him out for other care a few days a week but it's not feasible for us.

Also I've found that consistently reminding myself of why I have him home with me helps. The other thing is making sure I'm not letting him become the "scapegoat" because he's easiest target. It's much easier for me to say "Oh, there goes B again. This is awful, he's just so wild!" rather than really analyzing the situation and working to find triggers then solutions. (Not saying that what you are doing, just a trap I've found that I can fall into myself.)

LeslieG 11:13 AM 01-03-2018
Thank you! That is something to think about. It doesn't help that I have a group of mostly 2 year old boys! DS is extra wild on days when his best friend are here... they're all wild together. I want to pull my hair out by the end of the day!
Tags:center brats, contagious behavior, growing up in child care, providers own child, providers own children, unruly child
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