New Provider, New Baby

[Jaybird]

Hi everyone! I just opened my own home daycare after having my own baby. Right now I have one other infant who is 12 weeks old, same as my son. Her mother said she’s “cuddly”, which I have now learned is code for “she’s held 24/7 at home”. My son is very easygoing. We have delayed responding to his cries by 30 seconds since he was born. We put him down when he was asleep and set him down to play as a newborn. All of this has made him fairly independent and patient.

Well, the new baby is anything but patient and independent. I obviously can’t hold her 24/7, so she ends up crying quite often during the day. She doesn’t even really fuss, she just goes right to screeching. And unfortunately she has one of those cries that gives you the nails on a chalkboard feeling. I hate to let any baby cry, but she HAS to adjust to not being held all the time. So, how long does it take for babies to adjust to daycare vs being home with Mom all day? What can I do to help her get over this? Any advice?

[Ac114]

Is she a breastfed baby? I only ask because it could take a little longer for her to adjust. Can you ask mom to bring a shirt that she slept in the night before and let her hold on to it when she gets really upset. I would wait it out a month to see if there is ANY positive changes and if not, then reassess if you want to continue caring for this child.

[BrynleeJean]

Originally Posted by Ac114

I would wait it out a month to see if there is ANY positive changes and if not, then reassess if you want to continue caring for this child.

I would that this advice into your childcare career, especially with the infants because of this issue, put it right in your policies that the first month is a trial period for both you and the family to see if this is the best fit for both you and your family as well as the child and their family. Tuition gets paid and all but at the end of the 30 days they can choose or you can choose to terminate care. then you aren't stuck with an infant that just never adjusted!
in the meantime i like the advice about bringing a shirt, I've heard that works great like this
The but give yourself a certain amount of time for the child to adjust. if you put in your contract that you'd give two weeks notice id consider that when you think about how long you want to wait.
I had a child that i waiting about a month and half of crying, hoping for adjustment right around the corner that never came THEN gave her a notice, two weeks, and that was TWO MONTHS of crying. i could have saved myself if i worked it hard for two weeks and then pulled the plug or whatever.

[storybookending]

12 weeks is still pretty young but if I were you I would deff not be sugar coating your days when mom asks how the baby did (not saying you are). Mention the things you are doing to help her adjust to mom and tell her that you need her help in doing the same things at home to get her adjusted to group care.

[Jaybird]

Yes, she is breastfed. Mom said she’s been sleeping with a blanket to get her scent on it, but she keeps forgetting to bring it. :/ I’ll send her a text early tomorrow and remind her.
Thanks for all the advice!