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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Stay in the Bathroom with Pre-school Age?
Boymom 07:34 AM 10-20-2016
When a 3 or 4 year old goes to the bathroom, do you go in there with them or wait outside the door? Or do you let them go by themselves while you are tending to other kids in the next room?
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Blackcat31 07:40 AM 10-20-2016
Originally Posted by Boymom:
When a 3 or 4 year old goes to the bathroom, do you go in there with them or wait outside the door? Or do you let them go by themselves while you are tending to other kids in the next room?
Depends on the kid.

Most of my kids that I consider fully toilet trained perform bathroom duties on their own. If they need assistance, they just ask. ...Well, they yell from the bathroom...usually loudest during baby's nap time... but you get the point.

The younger ones that are just mastering toileting or are in the end stages of completion usually require my assistance in putting the stool in place, turning the faucet on or flushing etc.

Some kids go in, shut the door and do it all on their own.
Others do everything everything on their own but with the door open.
Others come get me and use the bathroom with my assistance.

Mostly I try to stay out of bathroom stuff if they wear underwear. My philosophy is that if they are old enough to have mastered toilet training, they deserve privacy.

What level of privacy is dependent on their level of mastery.
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Boymom 07:53 AM 10-20-2016
Thanks Blackcat! Since I've never worked in a center, and I've only been doing this for a year, I question pretty much everything I do! Haha!

I had a dcb this morning lock the bathroom behind him ugh, so I started thinking maybe I should stand by the door next time for this particular kid, but I think the other kids are ok by themselves!!
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Blackcat31 08:21 AM 10-20-2016
Originally Posted by Boymom:
Thanks Blackcat! Since I've never worked in a center, and I've only been doing this for a year, I question pretty much everything I do! Haha!

I had a dcb this morning lock the bathroom behind him ugh, so I started thinking maybe I should stand by the door next time for this particular kid, but I think the other kids are ok by themselves!!
Licensing does not allow us to have locks on the bathroom that can't be opened from the outside for that reason.

If a kid locked themselves in, we'd be in trouble.

I would require that child leave the door open if you don't trust him to not lock the door. Or remove the locking ability from the bathroom door....move it higher for adults if you don't want to remove it completely or make sure you have a key to unlock it from the outside. Just in case.
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Rockgirl 10:10 AM 10-20-2016
I do the same as BC. Awhile back, a dcm came for pickup, and I told her that her dd4 was in the restroom. She said, "She goes by herself?? You don't have to go sit with her? She won't go alone at home. I have to go sit on the tub."

Because I have time to hang out and chat in the bathroom with each of my six preschoolers.
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kendallina 10:58 AM 10-20-2016
All of my kiddos go potty with the door open. I can hear, but can't see them when I'm in the preschool room. I can see them if I'm in the kitchen. And other kids can see them if they're standing in line to go potty or wash hands. None of the kids seem to mind or have ever questioned why the door is open when they pee, I think they consider it like home.

Sometimes I'll have a 5-year old child before kinder that closes the door, which I have no problem with at all.
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daycarediva 11:07 AM 10-20-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Depends on the kid.

Most of my kids that I consider fully toilet trained perform bathroom duties on their own. If they need assistance, they just ask. ...Well, they yell from the bathroom...usually loudest during baby's nap time... but you get the point.

The younger ones that are just mastering toileting or are in the end stages of completion usually require my assistance in putting the stool in place, turning the faucet on or flushing etc.

Some kids go in, shut the door and do it all on their own.
Others do everything everything on their own but with the door open.
Others come get me and use the bathroom with my assistance.

Mostly I try to stay out of bathroom stuff if they wear underwear. My philosophy is that if they are old enough to have mastered toilet training, they deserve privacy.

What level of privacy is dependent on their level of mastery.
pretty much. I don't allow the dc kids to see each other when they use the potty- we start privacy chats at that age, too.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 12:00 PM 10-20-2016
Originally Posted by Boymom:
Thanks Blackcat! Since I've never worked in a center, and I've only been doing this for a year, I question pretty much everything I do! Haha!

I had a dcb this morning lock the bathroom behind him ugh, so I started thinking maybe I should stand by the door next time for this particular kid, but I think the other kids are ok by themselves!!
I have all preschoolers (12) and all potty trained children are all permitted to use the bathroom by themselves while I tend to others. I have 1 diapered child each day and they need my assistance when attempting.

The kids cannot shut the door completely. I have a foam door stopper at the top of the side of the door and I instruct them to gently close it so it doesn't break off (eventually they do, but they're CHEAP and I buy 10 at a time from Ebay for $1.88). http://www.ebay.com/itm/like/112009992802
I also have a door handle that has NO lock. So, even if they tried they aren't going to be able to lock the door!
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Controlled Chaos 12:18 PM 10-20-2016
I keep the door open a crack and stand near by. The bathroom is attached to the playroom so I can supervise both. All 3yos go completely independently. About half the 2s go alone, the younger 2s I help. My SA was the least trust worthy, so I always stood right by the door with it cracked when he went. (He's gone now )
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Pestle 10:41 PM 10-20-2016
I keep the bathroom door propped open and stay by the door. My oldest is barely 3 and has some potty issues, so she needs reminding during the process.
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MissAnn 04:55 AM 10-21-2016
Originally Posted by kendallina:
All of my kiddos go potty with the door open. I can hear, but can't see them when I'm in the preschool room. I can see them if I'm in the kitchen. And other kids can see them if they're standing in line to go potty or wash hands. None of the kids seem to mind or have ever questioned why the door is open when they pee, I think they consider it like home.

Sometimes I'll have a 5-year old child before kinder that closes the door, which I have no problem with at all.
This is exactly how I did it until one night I got a phone call at 10 o'clock at night complaining that her child had seen a boy go potty. Her child had just turned three! Later I found out she had called all the other daycare parents and got them in an uproar. All except one who told me she could care less if her daughter had seen a boy go potty! This is hard to explain but I can't have the kids shut the door. There is a stool in front of the sink so the kids can reach. The stool is right where the door would open into the bathroom. I don't want the kids moving the stool all around plus it would end up causing cross contamination. Now I have a curtain on the outside of the door that hides the kids inside. I resent having to have this curtain but if it keeps parents from calling each other and complaining.....so be it.
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Gemma 10:16 AM 10-21-2016
Originally Posted by Boymom:
When a 3 or 4 year old goes to the bathroom, do you go in there with them or wait outside the door? Or do you let them go by themselves while you are tending to other kids in the next room?
It depends on the child! some kids require no assistance/supervision, others do.
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kendallina 10:51 AM 10-21-2016
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
This is exactly how I did it until one night I got a phone call at 10 o'clock at night complaining that her child had seen a boy go potty. Her child had just turned three! Later I found out she had called all the other daycare parents and got them in an uproar. All except one who told me she could care less if her daughter had seen a boy go potty! This is hard to explain but I can't have the kids shut the door. There is a stool in front of the sink so the kids can reach. The stool is right where the door would open into the bathroom. I don't want the kids moving the stool all around plus it would end up causing cross contamination. Now I have a curtain on the outside of the door that hides the kids inside. I resent having to have this curtain but if it keeps parents from calling each other and complaining.....so be it.
Ugh...Yeh, it doesn't surprise me. I've definitely considered doing something so that kids can't see each other, but at this point, if a parent had a problem with it, then they are welcome to find care elsewhere. Fortunately, I tend to get 'crunchier' type families and no one has expressed an issue with it.
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Luke25 11:38 AM 10-21-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Depends on the kid.

Most of my kids that I consider fully toilet trained perform bathroom duties on their own. If they need assistance, they just ask. ...Well, they yell from the bathroom...usually loudest during baby's nap time... but you get the point.

The younger ones that are just mastering toileting or are in the end stages of completion usually require my assistance in putting the stool in place, turning the faucet on or flushing etc.

Some kids go in, shut the door and do it all on their own.
Others do everything everything on their own but with the door open.
Others come get me and use the bathroom with my assistance.

Mostly I try to stay out of bathroom stuff if they wear underwear. My philosophy is that if they are old enough to have mastered toilet training, they deserve privacy.

What level of privacy is dependent on their level of mastery.
Sorry for hijacking this post, but what do you do with the other kids while helping ones in the bathroom? I have a group that can't be left alone for even a second (I have a biter) and I have one I know will be potty training any time. Any ideas for me?! Im sort of stumped. I'm ready for them to be potty trained but nervous about that part.
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Blackcat31 12:23 PM 10-21-2016
Originally Posted by Luke25:
Sorry for hijacking this post, but what do you do with the other kids while helping ones in the bathroom? I have a group that can't be left alone for even a second (I have a biter) and I have one I know will be potty training any time. Any ideas for me?! Im sort of stumped. I'm ready for them to be potty trained but nervous about that part.
Honestly, my kiddos are pretty darn good... I also run a pretty tight ship when it comes to expectations. Usually I don't have more than one or two that need assistance and usually they don't need the help for very long so it's not a regular thing that I deal with....

If I had a biter or a child I *knew* was a potential danger to others, I'd either take that child with me or I'd plop them in a PNP for a few minutes. ANY thing so that I am able to prevent injury or conflict while I am pre-occupied.

If I am helping a one in the bathroom, they are usually at least 3yrs old or older so directives can be just as helpful as physically helping...kwim? Instead of actually assisting Janey with pulling her pants up, I can just as easily say "Janey, use your hands and grab on to the back of your pants. Use your other hand and grab the front. Yes, just like that. Now pull them up. A little farther, yep! You got this!" You get the gist...

I guess the biggest thing for me is knowing the kids in care and how their dynamics work. If I know Billy and Johnny argue over toys alot, I will find something for them to be preoccupied with while I am busy for a few minutes... I'll give each boy a specific job to do... Kids love being "helpers" I'll have one child straighten books or look for a specific one... basically anything to keep them busy while I am busy with someone other than them.

The key for older kids is to make sure they know your expectations BEFOREHAND and have a consequence for those that don't behave. For the littles ones that don't understand expectations, be proactive. Put them somewhere they can't get into anything or be a danger to themselves or others. HTH
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Pestle 02:38 PM 10-21-2016
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
I got a phone call at 10 o'clock at night complaining that her child had seen a boy go potty.
That's ridiculous. My daughter's at a private school with separate boys' and girls' bathrooms and she's come back telling me that "John has a big urethra and Mary has a little one like me and Bob has a big urethra . . . ."



Trying too hard to keep the kids from learning anatomy is just going to give them a complex. Or constipation. Or both.
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Febby 08:54 PM 10-22-2016
Do you want the licensing approved answer? Because legally, (in a center) we're required to see (and hear) all children at all times, which requires me to watch the child in the bathroom.

In reality, it's more of a judgement call. The majority of children do not need me to stand in the bathroom and watch them. A couple in my current group do need someone to keep an eye on them and to give out reminders as needed. The rest are fine on their own, though they do occasionally require minor assistance.

As far as children that I can't leave alone, I have a table between my two bathrooms and said child gets to sit there with an activity. Fortunately, I don't have those very often. If I had a whole group I couldn't leave alone, I guess they'd all be at tables doing table activities.
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Luke25 07:15 PM 10-23-2016
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Honestly, my kiddos are pretty darn good... I also run a pretty tight ship when it comes to expectations. Usually I don't have more than one or two that need assistance and usually they don't need the help for very long so it's not a regular thing that I deal with....

If I had a biter or a child I *knew* was a potential danger to others, I'd either take that child with me or I'd plop them in a PNP for a few minutes. ANY thing so that I am able to prevent injury or conflict while I am pre-occupied.

If I am helping a one in the bathroom, they are usually at least 3yrs old or older so directives can be just as helpful as physically helping...kwim? Instead of actually assisting Janey with pulling her pants up, I can just as easily say "Janey, use your hands and grab on to the back of your pants. Use your other hand and grab the front. Yes, just like that. Now pull them up. A little farther, yep! You got this!" You get the gist...

I guess the biggest thing for me is knowing the kids in care and how their dynamics work. If I know Billy and Johnny argue over toys alot, I will find something for them to be preoccupied with while I am busy for a few minutes... I'll give each boy a specific job to do... Kids love being "helpers" I'll have one child straighten books or look for a specific one... basically anything to keep them busy while I am busy with someone other than them.

The key for older kids is to make sure they know your expectations BEFOREHAND and have a consequence for those that don't behave. For the littles ones that don't understand expectations, be proactive. Put them somewhere they can't get into anything or be a danger to themselves or others. HTH
Thanks black cat! I figured you'd have some good advice!
That's pretty much what I was thinking for my little ones but hearing from a professional helps. I taught kindergarten but this is a completely different ballgame with these little ones!haha I'm learning as I go and want to do the right thing for my sweet littles.
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