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Unregistered 05:56 AM 10-31-2012
I'm a registered user but again, I've logged out for privacy.
So I'll try to make this a quick post...
I'm expecting our second child (14 weeks pregnant). I was down from 5 full time kids to 3 and kind of bummed because I wanted the extra money to help us get ahead and also give me more $ for mat leave (the more I make in 2012 the more I get for mat leave which will be 1 year)
A family called me about 6 weeks ago needing care ASAP for their twins. Reason- their last provider shut down and told them on a Friday. (Now that I know the kids/family I don't believe it- I think they were terminated). I agreed to take them on for the reasons above (more money now and more for mat leave)
The kids are a NIGHTMARE" ( the boy is the worst!) I've never seen kids like this....ever! They are almost 3 and don't understand much...don't have much in the line of vocabulary, almost never do as they are told and the boy has major outbursts and tantrums. Through the weeks it has become apparent that mom and dad are separated but still living together, dad doesn't do anything with the kids, and mom is "too busy" to really do much with them. Make no wonder they are the way they are.
I have literally turned into basically hating daycare because we never have a half decent day. I'm also now at the point where I'm getting headaches and migraines every day (and these twins don't help). My husband tried to convince me to term them but I wanted the money too bad.
Last week mom handed me their notice to resign from daycare (dad got laid off and can't afford it) so they gave their 30 days meaning their last day is December 4 (4 weeks away). I feel like I'm at my limit with these kids- I'm sick of the insane headaches, and having to be constantly after these 2 kids (he spends 1/4 to 1/2 of out day in time out or separated from everyone else).
My question is, should I try to suck it up and hang in there for 4 more weeks in order to make more now (before Christmas) and also meaning more $ while on mat leave or should I spare my sanity and take the loss financially and term sooner?
One minute I feel pulled together and feel strong enough to do it....the next minute I'm dealing with a splitting headache and feel so angry with these kids.
I should also mention that the other 3 daycare kids (plus my toddler) are NOT impressed with these 2 newer kids.
I'm so torn because I really want the benefit financially but I'm loosing my patience.
Thanks for your support and feedback
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Unregistered 06:40 AM 10-31-2012
NO amount of money is worth losing your mind over! Terminate-today!
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VTMom 07:33 AM 10-31-2012
I would hang on to them for the income, especially under your circumstances and with the holidays coming up. Just me though. I've been in your situation and it was the longest wait in my life! Sounds like the poor kids are really struggling in their lives right now. I know the feeling of being so stressed with problematic kids (headaches, losing sleep, dreading the moment they arrive at my house), but by providing solid, consistent care, you're giving them a great gift.

Get yourself a calendar and cross off each day until their last. I did this and had a count down rocking followed by a happy dance each day. Maybe on Fridays, plan something special, for you and the kids.

You can do it. You've made it this far! But if you really feel you can't make it, do what's best for your well-being as well as the childrens.

Good luck!
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Cat Herder 07:38 AM 10-31-2012
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
feel so angry with these kids.
I am one who always sides with working a bit longer to benefit all the families in my care, theirs and mine.

BUT once I felt true anger directed at the kids, then I'd say take the temporary loss.

Don't risk losing it all. Listen to your body and take a break.
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countrymom 07:44 AM 10-31-2012
this is why I do 2 weeks notice, I couldnt do a whole month. I would let them go early out of their contract, tell them your going on bed rest.
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Willow 07:55 AM 10-31-2012
Originally Posted by Cat Herder:
I am one who always sides with working a bit longer to benefit all the families in my care, theirs and mine.

BUT once I felt true anger directed at the kids, then I'd say take the temporary loss.

Don't risk losing it all. Listen to your body and take a break.

Agree.

Not to mention, being pregnant, if something were to happen due to all the stress or an injury from an out of control kiddo can you fathom coping through it? I think if you keep the kids and something happens to you or your growing baby you'll be inclined to blame yourself, probably for the rest of your life.

That's not a guilt I'd ever wish on another human being.
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Scout 08:34 AM 10-31-2012
Do not lie but, let them go. Your baby is the number 1 priority right now. How does the 1 yr maternity leave work? I am jealous!
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DBug 08:42 AM 10-31-2012
I'd start (if you aren't already) giving dcm feedback everyday about EXACTLY how the day went. Sometimes filling in the parent (and seeing their reaction) makes the decision easier to make .
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